On a recent Instagram post, Mo Abudu shared tips on how we can overcome our fears and start achieving successes. Above all, the need to believe we are as important like the important people we look up to.
Read her note here
….. I have said it time and time again, IF YOUR DREAMS DO NOT SCARE YOU, THEN THEY ARE SIMPLY NOT BIG ENOUGH!!! Please be rest assured that FEAR is part of the process.
Often times fear is caused by a lack of preparation. Overcoming fear is about being prepared and mapping out your plan. This leads me to the most popular reason you all gave for not achieving your dreams–PROCRASTINATION!!!
I strongly believe FEAR AND PROCRASTINATION work hand in hand. Once you map out your plan and start to work your plan – taking it in baby steps or big leaps and jumps depending on how you approach things, you will start to see progress. This is where PROCRASTINATION ends!!! As I always say, “IF YOU CAN THINK IT – YOU CAN DO IT”.
The challenge is how many of us are moving beyond “thinking” – we have to get up and “Do It”. Please do not be fooled by thinking the most successful people in this world are more intelligent than you or better than you – the secret is that they get up and “do” everyday! Never giving up! Never getting tired! Never taking no for an answer. This is the key to success. So please start drawing up those plans now and start doing!#MoAbudu
Favour Osiri Wisdom is an encourager, a certified marriage and relationship mentor with The Institute of Marriage and Family Affairs USA. A certified negotiation and conflict analysis expert with (USIP). United States Institute for Peace. She is the coordinator of the foremost marriage academy in the south south region of Nigeria; The Wisdom Driven Marriage Academy in the city of Port Harcourt which equips both married and intending marriage couples to acquire skills to build the marriage of their dreams.
Favour is passionate about women and girls. Having suffered so much under intense poverty growing up as the first child amongst seven children. She founded the Model Woman Foundation in 2016 where she mentors weekly organizing online seminars. She and her Pastor husband are presenters of a weekly relationship show called “For better for us” on Facebook . She recently authored two books tilted How Not to Marry an I.D.I.O.T and Before You Marry.
Favour believes her background cannot keep her back on the ground and she is determined to help restore more homes. She shares her story in this inspiring and educative interview.
Childhood My childhood is full of interesting events that have shaped me into the woman I am today. I didn’t have luxury growing up so being the first child amongst 7 children; my mind was constantly processing on what next to do to make money.
I learnt how to braid hair at age 10 and every Christmas season I made money from braiding hair I wanted to go to school at all cost because at that time I was going to be the first graduate in my compound ( both in my maternal and paternal home) .The poverty around me was just too much, I sold oranges during its season, I was involved in the “bole” business (roasted fish and plantain) which I inherited from my mother.
I ran a bukka joint in a mechanic garage at age 19. In 1998 I went to NYSC orientation camp in the city where I lived at that time to do food business.
When I saw the corp members come to buy food from my stand, I remember weeping one day because I wanted to be like them. I thank God I later saved up money from my mechanic garage food business to buy forms into the Polytechnic and went on to become the first graduate in my family (maternal and paternal) with many other degrees. All of these experiences are instrumental to what I do now which is to encourage and stir women around me to rise up
Inspiration behind The Wisdom Driven Marriage Academy and The Model woman foundation The wisdom driven marriage academy kicked off in 2016 and has brought illumination to a lot of singles and married couples. The testimonies are amazing.
The Modelwoman foundation is my gift to womanhood. It was founded in 2016. I am an encourager so I never fail to shamelessly use myself as an example of a woman who dare to excel against all odds I could speak to someone for hours with the intent to make sure they move to another level.
I was doing this with women around me and I saw them began to soar and felt I could reach more women globally using technology so in 2016, we started on whatsapp with few women and today we are grateful. We now hold an online conference tagged “The Complete woman Conference and a live conference tagged “Ignite”
My books; how Not to Marry an I.D.I.O.T & Before You Marry
How not to marry an I.D.I.O.T came as a result of my personal experience of manifesting these traits in the past and my interaction with intending couples and married couples alike. I have seen people marry with all the red flags telling them not to and the marriage breaks after few months. Some people also think marriage does not require skills but it does seriously.
Infact it is the most skilled intensive venture I know because you are dealing with the emotions and destiny of people. I.D.I.O.T is an acronym for traits which are red flags telling you not to continue with the relationship. People with Idiotic attitude are not ready to learn, they want to do marriage the way they like.
A lot of marriages are going through pain because of these Idiotic attitudes. The beautiful thing about the book is that it proffers solution on how to overcome these traits as a single or married person and gives you a step by step approach to end a forever idiotic relationship.
Before You Marry is a compilation of 50 things (There might be more) to consider before you marry. The book is to help intending couples with some of the relevant questions and discussions they need to have before they walk the aisle we live in the age where people see marriage as the next thing to check on their list without asking relevant questions. Questions reveal a lot of things.
Impact of Model Woman The modelwoman foundation has been a blessing to a lot of women. Most of these women I have never met because 90% of our engagement is online.
The vision of the foundation is to build excellent legacies so we deployed the strategy of pray and learn. Weekly we pray and organize seminar sessions addressing different issues. We have testimonies of over 60 women who have started new businesses in the group, women who had no idea on what business to start when they joined us, we have marriages restored through the seminars in the group, we have women discovering their purpose and pursuing them.
We have women who have been spiritually revived, the sessions on parenting was life transforming for the women. we have single mums, divorcees in our midst whose self esteem has been restored and are doing so well. We have ladies who were so deep into being side chic to married men end the relationships and turned a new leaf, we have married women involved in illicit relationships end the relationships and became purpose driven.
Challenges I work with women mostly, the challenge has been the limiting mindset where some of them believe they can’t get to certain heights because of their gender.
Another challenge is some people think getting married is the next thing to be checked on their list without adequately preparing for marriage. They prepare for wedding and not marriage. Just like flying a plane requires skills, marriage, even relationship in the work place requires skills else the marriaage will crash like a plane manned by an ignorant person.
Some couples are excited and working hard ontheir marriage, it is not that they have not had issues, they were only equipped with tools to handle even challenging seasons in their marriage.
Other Projects I have a passion for women, I also want them to pass the same passion to their daughters so we have the Mum and Daughter Ball (MDB) which is aimed at creating that intentional bonding relationship.
The maiden edition will hold this year. I also have a project for single mums and single dads which will come up before the end of this year. The big one is the Wisdom driven marriage retreat and resorts. A place for couples to unwind and bond.
Reward The testimonies of changed lives. One incident is a single lady who has been in a relationship with a married man for many years and depended on him for financial assistance. She told me she had always wanted to end the relationship but couldn’t because of the financial assistance she was getting.
Through the sessions on the modelwoman platform, she was able to break free and has an amazing life today working and making a living. So my greatest rewards are women who have found themselves and are unapologetically living their best lives.
On the cause of broken marriages lately Ignorance is a big issue. I am a firm believer that whatever you are not skilled in, you will kill and if you keep doing it for a long time, it can kill you.. People go to different schools to acquire knowledge in different fields and that’s why they do well. Communication skills, negotiations skills, parenting skills, financial skills and many other skills to build a solid marriage.. These skills are supposed to be acquired pre and post wedding.
Most pre-marital counseling curriculum are not updated to even handle today’s peculiar challenges. When these skills are lacking, marital frustrations begins to set it.. Many people want it fast and are not ready to be patient. Another example is when you do not recognize that the spouse you married 20 years ago has changed and you also need to change.( change here means growth)
To women who are about to get married
Discover yourself before you say yes to a marriage proposal. Your purpose in life will guide your choice. Be economically empowered.
Go into marriage as an asset not a liability. Be equipped with the skills and ensure your would be husband does same. Do not give in to pressure to marry anyone just because everyone around you is getting married. You will stand alone when the heat comes as those who pressured you will be no where to be found.
Give the relationship time. Ask questions. Because I am a Christian and believe that God ordained marriage, I will encourage that women talk to God about their proposed spouse or marriage. Also don’t be carried away by emotions, ensure both of you are agreeable.
My Inspiration My husband is my number one inspiration and cheer leader. The way he handles pressures and responds when there is a challenge is inspiring.
My 3 wise children constantly push me to study because of the enormous potential they carry. Every day I want to become a better parent who will continually unleash their potential for them to impact their world.
Being a woman of Rubies Wow! I decided long ago I was going to make a positive mark on every woman I meet. So intentionally mentoring them and ensuring they follow the process to make progress is what I think makes me a woman of rubies.
When we as women collaborate and not compete we will achieve so much because value is in people not places.
God has trapped what we need in relationships. Having the skills to find and nurture these relationships as women will make life so easy. So I must commend Women of Rubies for what they are doing by celebrating women. That’s the spirit!
Final words of advice for women all over the world Lookout for other women in your community, office, neighborhood. Collaborate, don’t compete. Aspire to the highest level God has designed for you. Don’t think because you are a woman you are inferior; you are the express image of God. Learn from other women. Celebrate a sister whose time of shinning has come and you will attract same.
At exactly 10:42pm on 8th of March 2017, I wrote “Heaven I need a Hug” on my wall , perhaps I needed a hug considering the fact that I have several back logs and I was stressed at the time, but beyond that I wanted to see how people will respond , I wasn’t disappointed with the number of e-hugs I received within thirty minutes BUT two friends had to slide to my inbox and asked me to put down the post, one said it showed too much emotions and the other said “you are too strong to be perceived like a weak woman Esther , bring it down its not good for your brand”. Wetin concern personal brand with emotions ogini?
This is exactly the reason why people suffer and die in silence , imagine if all the people who committed suicide recently put up a post similar to mine just to let people know they need help and get such response from their friends?
Please let’s allow people express themselves on social media the way and manner they like, as a matter of fact I want to encourage anyone who is down, depressed or about to give it all up , put up a post and let’s know what you are going through , sometimes the closet people to us are our biggest problem and you cant tell your problem to a problem, it’s fine to seek help on Facebook or any other social media platform or other direct means.
Feel free to write messages such as :
“I am Depressed”
“I need help”
“I need to talk to someone ”
“Please help”
“I need a therapist”
“I need a counsellor ”
Etc etc etc
Just express yourself however you feel and I am sure someone out there will reach out to you. I am positive we have good people who truly care in Nigeria, all you need to reach them is to SPEAK UP!
I have been down that road before, and it’s not just being depressed because life happened or stress, I was in my world, the over analysing and over thinking stage where you feel living isn’t worth it anymore, and I don’t pray to ever go there again, I was in self denial of my state of mind till a true friend who didn’t judge me asked that I seek help from a therapist . I am a survivor, no shame at all, and a proud Mental health advocate for She Writes Woman
I have a listening ear , I will give you a hug, give you my time and attention, walk you through the process but sadly I can’t offer you the professional help you need like the above mentioned persons. Please don’t die in silence , reach out, SPEAK UP and don’t let depression and suicide win.
Kindly add names of other therapist in the comment section ???.
Victoria Obaze, a Nigerian from Imo state made history on Wednesday, May 15, after she was sworn into office as Civic Mayor of London Borough of Tower Hamlets, United Kingdom (UK).
The News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) reports that Obaze’s inauguration on Wednesday, May 15, is the latest in turn of events that have seen Nigerians emerge as Mayors in their area councils of residence in the UK.
Obaze who contested three previous councillorship elections in 2010, 2014 as well as 2016 and failed, eventually succeeded in an election conducted on May 5, 2018 in Whitechapel Ward. She later became the council’s deputy speaker following her nomination by her Councillor Colleagues from where she took over the mantle as Mayor of London Borough of Tower Hamlets.
A statement containing brief history of Obaze obtained by NAN from her close associate and UK Chapter Coordinator, Ugonwanne Social Club Nigeria Int’l, a Nigerian socio-cultural group in UK, Ms Blessing Chijekwu, revealed that the newly sworn-in Mayor had lived in Borough for over 30 years.
“For Councillor (Cllr) Obaze life is all about service to humanity with diligence. Her political experience started when she was elected as one of the board of directors to oversee the regeneration of her area, the Ocean Estate, in the 1980s.
“The move motivated her to get into politics having noticed that there were no black women in the council chambers and this led her to open a project named Healthy Life Style for Stepney Women, East London.
“The project was funded by local authority through Ocean African Caribbean Association which she and her late husband Chief Evangelist Charles Obaze, co-founded.
“She also established Ocean Saturday School aimed at ensuring school attainment for children, as well as Ocean Football Club through which young boys were able to have residential football experiences with Chelsea football Club.
“Above all, Cllr Obaze loves God with a passion; she is a member of Parochial Church Council (PCC), as well as an Executive Council member at St Dunstan’s Church of England Parish in Stepney. “She is also a Secondary School governor in Tower Hamlets and a habitual visitor to the elderly and physically challenged in the community,” the statement quoted Chijekwu as saying.
The statement also quoted Lolo Ngozi Nwanze, President, Ugonwanne Social Club Nigeria Int’l as saying that Obaze was chosen as life matron of the club because of her meekness and morality. “These are the virtues that have brought her to where she (Obaze) is today.”
Selena Gomez is voicing her concern about the “terrible” effect that social media has had on her generation, and says she advocates taking breaks from the platforms.
Gomez who is the third most followed person on Instagram after soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo and pop singer Ariana Grande, said during a press conference at the Cannes Film Festival that she gets “scared” when she looks at the exposure of young girls and boys on those platforms.
“They’re not aware of the news or anything going on. It’s selfish I don’t wanna say selfish because it feels rude but it’s dangerous for sure. I think our world is going through a lot, obviously. But for my generation, specifically, social media has been terrible,” she said.
Asked what more she could do to improve the social media environment, given her large following, Gomez said it is “impossible” at this point to make it safe. She also said she tries to be conscious when posting on Instagram, to avoid putting unnecessary pressure on her fans.
“I’m very grateful I have the platform in any way, I can still share things I’m passionate about. I don’t do a lot of pointless pictures. I like to be intentional with it.” “I see these young girls, I’ll meet them and they’re just devastated dealing with bullying and not being able to have their own voice” she said.
Gomez also called on people to take breaks in social media use:
“It can be great in moments, but I would just be careful and allow yourself some time limits when you should use it and when not.”
Over 200,000 fans of the HBO series have signed a petition to redo the show’s final season.
According to the Change.org petition, called “Remake Game of Thrones Season 8 with competent writers,” fans of the show want the creators to step aside.
David Benioff and D.B. Weisshave proven themselves to be woefully incompetent writers when they have no source material (i.e. the books) to fall back on. This series deserves a final season that makes sense. Subvert my expectations and make it happen, HBO!
With 5 episodes already aired, the final episode of Game of Thrones airs on Sunday (May 19).
The petition is asking for 300,000 signatures and they almost have it with 291,671 signees at the time of posting.
According to the fans, “This series deserves a final season that makes sense.”
Bolaji Oluwadunsin Precious is a final year student of Federal University of Technology Akure, Ondo State. She is also the CEO of Dunsin Craft Collection Company @Dunsincrafts, a fashion brand aimed at using creativity to advance fashion and style. It specializes in using Ankara fabrics to make several products such as Souvenirs for events and conferences, Laptop bags, Handbags, Backpacks, Document holders, Notepads, etc.
She has trained about 200 females in the art of Crafts with Ankara to make up to 8 products in 2018.
Childhood
I was born in Ibadan but grew up with my dad at Abeokuta. My parents got divorced when I was 3 and my dad took custody of all 5 of us. I’m the 4th child.
After few years, my mum took custody of my younger sister and I. Growing up wasn’t so adventurous.
Inspiration behind Dunsin Craft Collection
The fear of poverty inspired me. There is a saying that ‘Worst situations bring out the best in people’…. I am a living example. I channelled that energy into what I love, Craft. I can make so many things with my hands, that’s why there is “Collection” at the end of my brand name.
Training of over 200 females in the craft of ankara..
I trained over 200 females in the craft of Ankara and the impact has been very strong. Months after the training, about half of them called me and chatted me up to express their gratitude and to also informed me of their progress. DCC is already working on a platform where we can do more.
The reception so far…
It has been amazing! The African fabrics (Kente/Ankara) has always given our products uniqueness and beauty!! Everyone, I mean everyone that sees the Ankara designed products are always wowed and show interest in them.
Inspiration
I am always inspired by women doing great things (Oprah Winfrey, Linda Ikeji, Michelle Obama, Alakija). I make researches online to see products other African countries make and I get motivated.
Greatest reward
Recognition as the Number one Accessory Designer in Ondo state. Top blogs and Website carried the feat.
Challenges
The major challenge I face, is balancing academics with business. I’m in my finals at FUTA. Others are financial which has made me put in for grants and apply for international applications where my business can be funded for more exploits.
On winning the Entrepreneur Of The Year award
I am encouraged to do more. To aspire more. To keep pushing. If I could get this award, I know greater things are on the way.
On giving up…
I have entertained the thought of giving up countless times. I would tell myself “why don’t you just marry a rich man” …. Lol. But then, the fear of marriage scares me sometimes, so it’s not an option. There are times when I would have less than a thousand naira in my account and make no sale for weeks. It’s been God holding me up.I just want to be like those I look up to and to inspire a lot of ladies too.
I am a Woman Of Rubies
My goals. My vision. My strength. My feminine power. My determination. My fighting spirit. My ability to keep moving forward even when nothing made sense.
Final word for women aspire to go into my line of business
Nothing is ever easy. So expect difficult situations. Always plan, so nothing takes you by surprise. Don’t stop believing in yourself, its dangerous. Run from anything/anyone negative. Eat and rest. Ask for help when you need it. Go out and connect with other entrepreneurs. Your biggest client might be into tech. Make research on what you do regularly. Love and Pray.
– DCC is a fashion brand aimed at using creativity to advance fashion and style. It specializes in using Ankara fabrics to make several products such as Souvenirs for events and conferences, Laptop bags, Handbags, Backpacks, Document holders, Notepads etc
Contact us :Facebook : Dunsin craft collections DCC Twitter : @DunsincraftsTel No :08107795747
You are offered a nice job position, in a nice communication agency, well located. You feel great.This was supposed to be the biggest announcement of 2019 so far.
First day : everyone is smiling at you, welcoming, but you don’t know how to act, feeling everyone’s look upon you. 15 days later, you’re done. Nobody speaks to you.
My first (and peculiar) reaction : asking Google about that. Because that state of loneliness hit me so hard that something in my head told be to check on the internet if I could share this with other people. I found several psychological/kind of depressing articles, but didn’t find anything appropriate. These were just a bunch of people complaining without giving advices about it.
Being connected to a social circle has never been so important as far as Facebook, Twitter Instagram or Snapchat have (or at least one of them) taken over our lives. (Really ?). But Internet is another problem.
At work, indifference is the greatest contempt
People at work can be even more cruel and can really destroy you for no particular reason. When you’re highly implicated, work hard, do the best you can and all of a sudden you feel so bad because you see people gathering themselves to talk, make private jokes, working (or acting like working) closely together, trust me, it is normal to feel left behind.
Welcome to ostracism. A land where your imagination is tortured everyday. It is not about being sensitive, because sensitivity is different from one person to another. It is strictly about being ignored.
So how can you handle at work ?
Right now, your boss is not talking to you anymore, and you’re one of these scared “millenial” that thinks that work should be a place where you can express yourself, in a blossoming workspace, with some intricate and thrilling frameworks, imagining stories that matters. And you’re not doing any of these things. You’re not fitting to the work spirit of the company, and now, panic-stricken.
All social interactions with your coworkers are slowly going down, to the point of not even saying “hello/goodbye”. It’s going wrong for real. And this ostracism can lead to depression, because feeling useless and hopeless
1 — Stop complaining
Did I mention that I’m French ? I think it is truly specific to my country. People are complaining every minute in advertising/digital agencies. About clients, about emails, about the amount of work, about the boss… This is clearly annoying. Their time spent complaining could be used doing real-work no ?
So if you’re being ostracized, be strong, and simply face this fact as it is. Being down-to-earth is very useful when facing that kind of situation. It is important to visualise the situation to better go forward and being less stressful.
2 — Dig up your mind
Ok so, now that you have understood the situation, let the anger and worries go and stop trying to make clumsy conclusions or getting ahead of yourself, asking “but why is this happening, what did I do, did I made something wrong, maybe I’m not good enough…” In every overrated advertising agencies, people are mostly the same, so you will face this situation in every one of them. Just sayin’. I’ve been working in agencies for 4 years, and it’s been exactly the same, most of the people are faking work.
“Think outside the box, make things that change things” (and other posh mottos), they said. Agencies are mainly copy and paste. They are baking and re-baking ideas since 1980’s, but with higher prices, using the same Istock / Getty / Shutterstock/ Thinkstock image banks. Using the same reportings with so low Facebook interactions, not even asking themselves what people would like to see when interacting with brands. It is really funny since I’m writing this from my desk, in a nice advertising agency, observing people writing emails, sending Gif or tagging themselves on the last Tasty recipe on Facebook.
If you are feeling alone and like you’re in the spam box, it’s seriously no big deal. You have now time to think about yourself and step back at how different you are, simply by speaking your mind and asserting yourself .
3 — Just do something else with your free time
Now that you are barely transparent, you can do things far more interesting than nothing. Meaning : “Great ! I’m out of this sham and mockery system.” Read, take time for yourself, leave your phone, learn something you didn’t know. In a nutshell, be curious.
If you read this, you can now take a deep breath and play down the situation. And if you want more cool, follow me 🙂
LVMH and Rihanna’s fashion venture is finally materializing. Riri is set to present her first collection for the new label, which will be branded Fenty, later this month in Paris.
The label is called Fenty, after the singer’s full name – Robyn Rihanna Fenty, and will launch in Spring 2019.
Rihanna will become the first woman to create an original brand at LVMH, the first woman of color at the top of an LVMH Maison, and her line will be the first new house created by the group since Christian Lacroix in 1987. It joins such storied heritage brands as Dior, Givenchy, Celine and Fendi and positions Rihanna as a breakthrough designer on a number of levels.
The singer, who has 70 million followers on Instagram, is widely known for her bold fashion choices.
Fenty, which will produce clothing, shoes, and accessories, is the first new label under the LVMH brand since 1987. The label will join around 70 brands already in the LVMH group, including Louis Vuitton, Christian Dior, and Givenchy.
In a statement, Rihanna said that she had been given a “unique opportunity to develop a fashion house in the luxury sector, with no artistic limits.”
She added: “I couldn’t imagine a better partner both creatively and business-wise, and I’m ready for the world to see what we have built together.”
The chairman and CEO of LVMH, Bernard Arnault, said Rihanna would be supported with a team and resources.
“EVERYBODY KNOWS RIHANNA AS A WONDERFUL SINGER, BUT THROUGH OUR PARTNERSHIP AT FENTY BEAUTY, I DISCOVERED A TRUE ENTREPRENEUR, A REAL CEO, AND A TERRIFIC LEADER,” HE SAID.
The singer’s cosmetics brand, Fenty Beauty, reached nearly 500 million euros (£431 million) in sales by the end of 2018. The brand has been widely praised for its inclusivity.
Rihanna also launched her own Savage X Fenty lingerie line in 2018.
19-year-old Nigerian medical student, Emediong Uduak Uko’s painting of music legend, ‘Lagbaja’ has become the first African work to be displayed at the Cyprus Modern Art Museum.
Emediong is also the youngest artist and only African to have her work exhibited at the museum, which is the largest in the Mediterranean region.
The excited artist shared the news on her Instagram page @Emilyuko where she further revealed that her painting is now in the possession of Forbes-listed Cypriot businessman, Suat Günsel.
Emediong explained in her social media post that she dedicated her painting to the iconic faceless singer, Lagbaja because he inspired culture and created both war and peace with his passion.
She wrote, “I’m pleased to announce to the general public that my artwork is now a part of the vast collection of the Cyprus Modern Art Museum!
“This is the largest museum in the Mediterranean region. My work is now in the possession of the owner of my university- Forbes listed Cypriot Businessman, Suat Günsel.
“Apparently, I am the youngest and only African Art piece in the entire museum with works dating as far back as 1940. Somebody pinch me!
“More importantly, this painting is dedicated to none other than the legendary Nigerian musician and political activist himself, Lagbaja. @officiallagbaja.
“I decided if I’m going to put a timeless piece in the walls of a foreign land, it should be about the ones back home.
“Sir, if you’re reading this, know that you’ve inspired a culture. You’ve created both war & peace with your passion and creativity and that is everything I stand for. This is the least I could do to show appreciation.
“I’d like to thank God and his Spirit that makes things possible through me- He placed me here. The fact that my art value has gone up more than 10x by reason of this event is still mind-blowing.
“To all the curators and friends who kept this huge announcement on the down-low and pumped me with endless support, I love you,” she said.
Emediong is also a muralist and mixed-medium artist who runs a budding arts company called Asher’s Palette.
