Tag

women of rubies

Browsing

In the article, renowed writer  Catherine  Kupta stated that in her opinion, the reason why we see so few highly successful women at the top is that women are not as aware as men are of the power of personal branding, whether it’s self-promotion, projecting confidence or strategic networking. She then gives seven tips for success based on her discussions with over 150 highly successful women.

We hope these tips make your journey to the boardroom smoother and shorter.

Enjoy!

  1. Speak out at meetings

In general, women tend to speak up less than men in meetings and wait to be asked a direct question before they speak. While this can be polite behaviour, it can be misinterpreted. People might even think that you lack ideas or confidence or talent. You have to learn to join the business conversation and confidently express your ideas if you want to be successful.

  1. Stay “on brand”

Highly successful women know what they stand for and are authentic and consistent in the way they present themselves at every touch point too, whether it’s participating in meetings, leaving a succinct voicemail message on the phone, composing an email or attending corporate events.

  1. Don’t under-market yourself.

Humility may be a virtue but women can take it too far! One global study of male and female leadership found that most women tend to downplay their accomplishments, while men tend to promote their accomplishments. Highly successful women don’t leave career success to chance. They learn how to promote themselves and figure out a way to do it that’s authentic and effective. After all, if you don’t market yourself, who will?

  1. Fake it until you make it

Women are notorious at feeling that they’re not ready for a new assignment or promotion unless they can check off every box in the skill set required for the position. Highly successful women often tell me that they forced themselves to go after stretch assignments even if they weren’t ready. Sometimes you need to “fake it until you make it,” to get over the initial jitters and until you feel confident in a new role.

  1. Be visibility minded

Many women are visibility challenged and are not well-known outside of a very small network. Talent is important, but visibility separates those who are wildly successful from those who are just doing okay. That’s because there is a “visibility premium.” If you’re well-known, people think you are better than others who are not so well- known. She must be good because she’s well-known in the company is how the thinking goes.

  1. Pay attention to style

Women are scrutinised more in the business world, so you might as well turn it into an advantage! Realise that your clothes, hairstyle, office, even your make-up convey “messages” to others. You want to convey the right message for your organisation but have your own style. For most career women, there’s one important message your image must convey; you must project authority.

  1. Take a power pose

Poses such as standing tall, leaning in towards others or expansive hand gestures convey high power. Crossing arms across your chest or crossing your legs convey low power. Highly successful women try to use high power poses to underscore the words that they use.

Source: Source: Catherine Kaputa at http://www.hrzone.com

If you want to know the positive impact of social media , Please go on Olufunmilayo Odunaike wall on Facebook, this beautiful woman who have been tagged “Mother Theresa” on Facebook made a simple post to give 20,000 to someone in need and ended up getting more donations of over half a million from well meaning Nigerians.

Although this is not the first time she will be “Paying it forward”on her page but this particular post however went viral and got the attention of  passionate Nigerians , who not only donated but also gave material support to those in need. Sh also had a panel who helped in the selection criteria to help in disbursing the money to those who TRULY need it.

Since she kicked off the “Paying it forward” initiative several accolades have been rolling in from different people, mostly Facebook users who were blown away by her kind heart.

 

Here is what some have to say about her kind gesture:

Chris Adetayo wrote:

Homage. To Olufunmilayo Odunaike, Facebook Nigeria’s Mother Teresa and the Sage of “Paying It Forward”. 2017 is only 2 months old but it’s doubtful if anyone will surpass what she has already done for quite a number of unknown folks in Nigeria via Facebook in what remains of the year.

Like all great things, it started out rather casually. And small. She put up a post asking anyone who is struggling to provide food for self and or family to write out a small justification for support. She had N20,000 on offer. Before long, she was flooded with lots of tear-inducing stories of folks seeking help. More impressively, many friends joined in contributing money for the cause. By the end of the day, she had enough to offer 17 “unknown” people N20,000 each.

Fuelled by the growing financial support of many who are drawn by 1] the keen desire to help those going through hard times and 2] the innate trustworthiness of Funmi, this cause has grown in leaps and bounds. And ever so diligently, Funmi and a small panel of like minds select recipients based on well-judged and clearly spelt out criteria, disburse the sums available and render full account of same. All on her Facebook wall. This week, this self-imposed task has seen this full-time worker, wife and mother visit some patients in an hospital to make donations. Mother Teresa will be immensely proud.

So, Sis, take a bow. The world is celebrating you already! And to all my FB friends who are moved to help out the needy in this trying times, please reach out to them through this lady with a heart of gold. The Angels will smile at you” 

Omotoyosi Ogunbanwo  had this to say :

See ehn…. anyone who asks who Facebook epp needs a slap on the face really.

Olufunmilayo Odunaike made a post this morning promising to give #20k to someone in need. And right now I have no idea how much the total donations have been.

This evening it was about 240k in total.

Wow…. I am beyond surprised.

Loads of people are in need.

You don’t have to have enough to give out.

I always tell people, you can never give out without receiving. As long as you do it with happiness and love.

I have no words for all the donors.

It is my prayer that the universe smiles on them. And they get all they ever wish for.

People are suffering. The economy is hard. Give the little you can. Your neighbour might have no idea what to eat for dinner. 1k can do a lot in some people’s life.

Give and never stop giving.

And you would never lack.

Try it.

You don’t even need to pray. Just give with love.

Thank you @olufunmilayo for this initiative.

Yesterday Funmi gave a report on how much was raised on her Facebook page:

Paying it forward.

N175,000 raised between yesterday and today. Wow! All donors prefer to remain anonymous. Some have indicated that the funds go to 2yrs old Mary Idowu who is finally receiving treatment. I am glad we’ll be able to go back to LASUTH as promised. From a meagre N20,000, we already disbursed N615,000 and raisedN790,000 in total. My people, you are the reason we continue to pay it forward. God bless you. When we come together, we can do amazing things. Thanks to you all.

*** We salute your courage and appreciate all you have done and still doing to help humanity. Thanks for giving hope to the hopeless and shining a light on their dark path.

You are a Woman of Rubies inside out and we celebrate you Funmi.

 

Gospel artist Glowreeyah is a year older today!

The Musician took to her Instagram page to release new photos, in which she looked absolutely Gorgeous! She also shared a powerful message in form of an open letter to God.

Read the letter below

From the very moment when I became a destined thought on your mind
For my first cry and for my last smile
For every angel and humanoid assigned to bless me on this journey
For every Gethsemane night and for every Hosanna day
For every teardrop and for every joy fount
For every wilderness and for every green pasture
For every height and for every depth
From Bridget’s womb,for my first breath till my final sigh at the appointed time when i behold your glory …when i finally see your face

Written by your own hand,I remain your story of unending mercy and custom-made grace!
Make my life your eternal expression as I waltz into this new season with you..for you…because of you!

You remain my ultimate affection.
I remain your Glow-child!

Thank you for being a Loving and Living Father to me!

Your Daughter,

Glowreeyah
#mybirthdayworship #glowreeyah #madein1977

See more photos below

Credit
Photography @tybello
Styling @tybello and @chechesignature
Makeup @jbeautyfull

Africa produces nearly 70% of the world’s cocoa yet the continent is not known for making luxury chocolate. Princess is a woman on a mission to change that. Her company, Kalabari Gecko produces different kind of chocolates in Nigeria, using only Nigerian contents.

Princess had always loved chocolate from as far back as when she was little. This is probably one of the things that motivated the business. In her own words, “there is something very compelling about the visual structure of chocolates and its formation in a box. There is the mystery embedded in the interiors of its inner cavities, and the burst of polyphenols, a reward your brain is always thankful for.”

Another reason she started making chocolates was the fact that whenever she traveled outside Nigeria, she was always asked to come back with chocolate, when there’s so much cocoa in the country. She wanted to change the narrative.

The journey to achieving this has not been easy. Since there were no chocolate making schools or classes in Africa, she had to go to North Europe to learn the art of turning bean to bar.

Her dream is for her factory to produce high quality affordable chocolate for Nigerians and the people they love all over the world.

On how knew how to make chocolate

I have always had this love for chocolate. I think it was as far back as when I was a little girl and being ascribed to as having a chocolate complexion. Also as a child, my sister planted a cocoa tree in front of our house all on her own.

There is something very compelling about the visual structure of chocolates and its formation in a box. There is the mystery embedded in the interiors of its inner cavities, and the burst of polyphenols, a reward your brain is always thankful for.

Whenever I travelled outside Nigeria, people would request I come back with chocolate. That used to get me upset. My response sometimes would be, “But we have cocoa, why don’t we make ours?” It was even sadder when visiting friends or family abroad, I had nothing to offer as gifts from my beloved Nigeria. So, you can say it was a two edged-sword. Thinking about Nigeria and the cocoa we have motivated me to stop talking and start creating.

She wants to make Nigeria the sweetest place in Africa!

 

Most people toy with the idea of becoming entrepreneurs at least once in their life. I mean who wouldn’t? Especially after coming across a very successful one. Yeah, I know that feeling. But frankly speaking, entrepreneurship is not as rosy as it seems. So don’t just run into it because your cousin did so, and he seems to be doing well.

Personally I took that leap of faith that made me a die-hard entrepreneur sometime in 2013, and since then I have not looked back. I have had my fair share of challenges, but rather than deter me, they propel me for greater heights. And if given the opportunity again, I will still opt for entrepreneurship over and over again.

What about you? Have you ever toyed with the idea of being your own boss? Have you ever wondered if starting and running a business is your thing?

Don’t look too far. The clues below will help you make that decision. Of course, it is not exhaustive, but don’t hesitate to raise your hands and shout Hallelujah if I make a point that kinda hits close to home.

Let’s walk…

You wanna be Independent
Earlier this month, I visited an old friend of mine in Warri. And even though we have been in touch to an extent, I was really shocked and excited to see how well he was doing for himself. We had a lot of catch-up time, and I just couldn’t resist asking him what prompted him to quit his job when he did.

I mean, I remember when he was working in Enugu. And before I knew what was happening I heard he quit and started his own business. His main reason? Independence.

You see that life where you call the shots on how you spend your day, where you go, what you do, when you work or not, and most especially, how much you earn, it cannot be quantified.

For me, my eureka moment was when I told myself that even if I was selling zobo and puff-puff, I would make much more than I was being offered in the last place I worked. And when I got to that point, there was no stopping me.

Your job doesn’t give you fulfillment
I know what it means to work at a job that doesn’t give fulfillment. I mean you wake up in the morning happy, only to get sad at the thought of going to work.

Yeah, used to happen to me a lot when I was working with an Insurance company in Lagos.

Truth is that everyone wants to be fulfilled. And if your job doesn’t offer you that, it’s time you thought seriously about creating a job that could give you just that. If working at that crazy million dollar idea of yours smells fulfillment to you…that’s a sign right there.

You don’t want to compromise on your life Goals
Sometime in 2009 I wrote down a list of things I hoped to do before I die. One of them was what drove me to go for what became my first swimming experience. Apart from that, I equally wrote a lot of things that had to do with starting and running a couple of businesses.

But I didn’t just write these goals down; I got committed to pursuing them. I knew that a goal I don’t pursue will never get actualized.

If your job is not helping you achieve your life goals and you’re no longer comfortable with that, it is time to consider moving from employee to entrepreneurship. Nothing should matter more than achieving your life goals. That should form the very essence of your daily activities. So look at your job again, is it servicing your life goals?

Recurrent ideas
Don’t quit your regular job because of one idea that just flashed your mind. Ask every successful entrepreneur, it really has to be an idea that keeps coming to you. In my own case, the thoughts kept me awake at night, and gave me daydreams during the day.

So don’t be deaf. Take note of those ideas that keeps coming to you. The more recurrent, the clearer it becomes. These recurrent ideas come with an unusual surge of energy. If that is you, then entrepreneurship is for you.

An idea is the first milestone in building a successful business. Tweet that!

Your passion
Passion fuels inspiration. If your inspiration is fueled by a passion for something outside your regular 9-5 job, then please consider following your passion.

Find something you are passionate about and do it passionately. If you love the social media a lot, Instagram for instance, then let your passion drive you to seek out how to monetize that Instagram account.

But note that passion, not money, should guide your decision to become an entrepreneur. If you are genuinely passionate about providing a solution, then you are surely going to do well as an entrepreneur.

The hallmark of entrepreneurs is their passion for providing solutions other than just the prospect of a better paycheck. (Quote me)

So, what’s your story? Has the thought of starting your own business been giving you sleepless nights? What’s been keeping you from taking that leap of faith, even if it’s a side-hustle? What are you waiting for?

 

Source: Bellanaija.com

You know we love profiling Amazons and Trailblazers, Women who beyondjust being part of the board room are making change happen. We  profile some of this  epic black and female innovators you should know.

The_Budgetnista-headshot-2

The’ Budgetnista’ Tiffany Aliche.

She works tirelessly to make sure more women worldwide become more financially savvy. Isn’t that amazing? She does this through her Facebook group and bestselling books. Because of her consistency and excellence in the field, she has been featured on Forbes, New York Times, Essence and more.

Laura Weidman Powers

laura-weidman-powers-hero-2350x1520

What’s not to love about a beautiful and fearless woman who daily does all she can to make black people proportionately represented in tech. She is the co-founder of CODE2040 a nonprofit organization that creates pathways to educational, professional, and entrepreneurial success in technology for underrepresented minorities.  Laura was a senior policy adviser for Science and Technology in Obama’s administration.

Evita Robinson

 

SONY DSC

Who creates a group dedicated to building a community of travelers and making world travel more accessible to people of color and successfully builds the group to more than 14, 000 members? Evita! She has even built a successful business around the community.

Bozoma Saint John

3062124-poster-p-2-the-apple-breakout-star

Boz as she is fondly called is the Ghanian- Amercian woman , making waves at Apple Music. She was recently appointed the head of global consumer marketing for iTunes and Apple Music and has proved her worth ever since. She is the brains behind the biggest Apple Music ad ever starring Taraji P. Henson, Mary J. Blige and Kerry Washington.

Lindsey Day

5898a42f1900003400e0a400

Natural hair is the in thing but we love that Lindsey found a new way to celebrate the movement. She started CRWN, the world’s first natural hair magazine. The quarterly publication amplifies the experiences of women of color with curls and afros to celebrates them like the queens they are.

Curled from Leadingladiesafrica.org

Kunbi is the executive director of SESEWA; a company she founded while still in university in 2009. She holds an LLB from Obafemi Awolowo University and was enrolled as a solicitor and advocate of the Supreme Court of Nigeria in 2010. Her company, SESEWA is at the forefront of providing internship and career opportunities for Nigeria’s young generation and she is building a legacy for internship businesses in Nigeria. Adekunbi is a frequent speaker at youth events, and a big inspiration for young people in Africa cities in Africa. In this interview, the beautiful entrepreneur opens up on how she has been able to build SESEWA into a formidable brand.

Growing Up
Growing up for me was fun and filled with lessons. I was the child that was born to work…. I was really enterprising, I still am but when I was younger, I engaged in several kinds of businesses. I was particularly thrilled by the reward and satisfaction I got when I delivered a certain value or sold something. Let’s just say I was born for enterprise!

Inspiration behind Sesewa?
My sesewa experience is one that has changed my life forever.
Xby Counterflix

For me, SESEWA is not just a business idea; it is more like a mandate attached to my life. It is seated at the core of my existence. SESEWA started first with my deepest desire to have people experience clarity and pursue a career they were really in love with because that was what I felt like after I had an internship in a law firm as an undergraduate. That experience left me empowered and I felt everyone deserved this opportunity- To be sure about what they wanted to create with their lives.
This desire grew into a business because of my highly entrepreneurial spirit. The business operates as a social enterprise designed to tackle the diversified problems of recruitment and unemployment in Nigeria. We specialize in providing internship, volunteering and job-shadowing opportunities to youths. With our well-developed curriculum, training school and set of assessments, the regular Nigerian graduate is transformed into a job-ready professional. This serves a dual purpose, in that it also provides organizations the best wave of talents to drive their corporate vision. For those who don’t know, the name SESEWA is a coinage gotten from a Yoruba expression ‘Se ise wa?’ (Is there a Job?)This seems to be question on the lips of many Nigerian graduates and SESEWA will always say YES! We have got the RIGHT JOB for you!

Beyond Expectation
The truth remains that the big picture for SESEWA keeps expanding as we break new grounds; and yes! SESEWA is having the effect I caught a glimpse of in my mind years back. It just keeps getting better. Today, young people walk into my office with potentials that are worked upon and made valuable. They always leave better than they came. I have my interns go to clients and I get feedbacks from clients saying the interns are so fantastic that it is difficult to pick just one intern for the job. We call it the SESEWA Experience… As I will always say, “there is no discrimination against excellence.” Once you deliver excellence with innovation and passion, it doesn’t matter the color of your skin, you will stand before kings.

Reception
Just like every other ‘new’ idea, SESEWA had some acceptance issues, basically because the concept was not so popular when we started. We just did our part, defined the value we were offering and we were determined to be the best at it. It wasn’t long before individuals and organizations started warming up to the idea. Let me mention here that there are times you just need to believe in you enough to give others the right reasons to believe in you too. I had people who believed in SESEWA because of the confidence and passion with which I spoke about the value we proposed to deliver even though we were doing it for the first time. I look back now; I am so fulfilled and grateful to God for being my Anchor.
Xby Counterflix

Giving Up
This is one truth not so many people talk about. Fulfilling purpose is not as easy as spelling P.U.R.P.O.S.E. It sometimes feels like swimming against the current, it is super difficult. There were days that didn’t look so bright, there were days I didn’t feel up to the title “Executive Director” but at such times I was reminded of the WHY behind SESEWA and I got energized again. This is one thing I tell everyone who cares to listen, understand the purpose behind anything you do because when the road gets rough, you will be in one piece, strengthened by WHY you started in the first place. So, at the times I felt like giving up, I remembered SESEWA is not about me. This makes me jump out bed every morning whether I felt like it or not. Though right now, I feel we have gone too far to look back. The only RIGHT way is FORWARD!
Relationship with Interns
Yes, we have succeeded in building a FAMILY. It is not just a work relationship. Our lives are so intertwined with the entire process that after the internship, it is hard to go back as just regular people. For the SESEWA family, we are consciously raising a new breed of excellent, talented professionals to redefine work in this part of the world.

Challenges
Every idea, business and journey has peculiar challenges. SESEWA had the challenge of acceptance as certain organizations didn’t understand what we were proposing at first. We had to work on our product, curriculum to ensure we deliver excellent value every time. We were also faced with fund challenges just as many start-ups with bills rising and demanding attention.

Future Plans for Sesewa
We hope to expand our sphere of influence, reach out to more youths, develop more products and programmes that can come in handy to youths as we groom the best waves of talent, the most sought after in the land. We also hope to establish solid local and international partnerships with other organizations.
Advice for Young unemployed Female Graduates?
Give yourself more credit. You are awesome too if only you can believe in yourself. Please don’t define your entire life by your current phase of being without a job; just don’t be idle. Keep your hands and mind busy. Get as much skills as possible. The internet has made it so easy for you to learn practically anything, enroll for online courses, volunteer for projects, get an internship just ensure you are increasing in value. What employers pay for is not the number of years you spent in school or the kind of school you graduated from but the value you can bring to the table.
For those who want to run their businesses, don’t get too excited yet; get the needed skills and knowledge and please get a mentor! The concept of mentorship has been abused but I am sure you can still find great people who will be willing to take you through the paths they have walked in smarter ways.
What Makes You A Woman Of Rubies?
I will just describe who I am in my own words and you will decide if that qualifies me to be a ‘Woman of Rubies’, I am simply Adekunbi Adeoye, a woman passionate about living out the blueprint of the Master for her life. I love God with my whole being. The process of fulfilling my purpose of helping others discover who they are has developed traits in me that I find amazing myself. I am a fantastic problem solver. I don’t see problems; I see opportunities to touch lives. I am highly enterprising, I am so gifted that I believe I can sell anything even sand and still create a lucrative business out of it.

Final Word for Young Women?
Don’t put a pause on your life waiting for anything! It doesn’t suggest that you shouldn’t be patient; just don’t be mediocre. Discover what your life was designed to be and spend every moment living it out. Live freely! Dance, Sing out loud! You are beautiful, celebrate yourself always and quit settling for less!

 

Bonang Matheba keeps winning our hearts all the time! Call her a diva, a social media queen, a super woman – she is all of that and much more!   Here are our top ten reasons for not being able to get over her:

  1. Bonang is pro-woman all the way

Boning is a staunch lover and promoter of women. Even more, she is a strong believer in the strength and dreams of African women. To her, a woman can have it all.  Her dream to promote self-love in women led her to launch her lingerie line, Distraction. Through it, she encourages women to embrace their bodies.

  1. She’s got burnt and made it through

Bonang did not just wake up one morning to become an overnight ‘disney’ princess. She has had her very fair share of disappointment and frustration. She’s been called names. What she did? She moved past it all and gave herself a better choice. She grew to be the woman we all love now.

  1. She’s a serial achiever

Bonang is such an inspiration to many young ladies. She has had more achievements than most media personalities can get for themselves. Of course, she has become a favourite cover star for renowned international fashion and lifestyle magazines such as Grazia, Marie Claire and Elle South Africa. Talk about a black girl who rocks?

bonang-ema

  1. She is love’s biggest fan

For Bonang, love is everything. That, for her, is the biggest principle to live and work by. She tells LLA, “it is the love that drives the passion of what I do, being true to myself means I will always be authentic in what I do and the brands I align myself with, happiness brings positivity into your life and the more of it the more life seems great”.

  1. Bonang is an early planner

For Bonang, life did not have to start at 21. At 13, she did not have anyone telling her what to do, she had it all figured out. She knew just what she wanted to be and went right ahead to chase after it at 16 by kicking off her career in a South African’s television series for kids.

  1. She’s a perfect fit in two contrasting worlds

If she is not here on the noisy, photo-splashed side of glam, then she’s on the other side. Either way, Bonang makes a perfect blend of both worlds. She knows how to be just the diva and the home girl.

IMG_1745

  1. She’s a super slay queen

Bonang is a fashion favourite and definitely a designer’s muse. She does as much justice to the red-carpet as to the streets. She is a slay queen with a capital ‘S’.

  1. She’s not just about the glam

Bonang is not just about the pretty face or the 6-inches. She pushes herself to be better and smarter, and we’ve come to know that a pastime of hers is reading. Oh yes, she loves to read. Her favourites are socio-political books. So, thinking of being the next Bonang? Try reading a few books.

  1. She is on the look-out for everyone

There is no disputing the fact Bonang loves her fans and wants as much good for them as she does for herself. She is an amazing giver. Whether it involves offering mentorship to young girls or inviting her fans to an expense paid trip, Bonang is willing to do so much and more.

  1. She stays leading!

Bonang is our quintessential Leading Lady! She just keeps on winning! She is a perfect blend of both the entertainment and fashion industries. She is leaving the B prints everywhere she can possibly be. We love, love, love her!

Source: Leadingladiesafrica.org

Last week I had loads of fun with the Old Girls’ Association of my secondary school. It was the maiden edition of our reunion and we were happy to see each other again. Of course we have changed, both in looks and sizes, but one thing was sure, we all have fond memories of our secondary school days. It was weird to realise that I graduated from secondary school exactly 20 years ago. There was so much to catch up on, and so much to gossip about. I am looking forward to the gathering again.

My school, St Joseph’s College Aba, was a very popular school and one of the best schools in our time. The standard of education and moral values were high. It also was also reputed to have the finest girls then, and as such our school activities always witnessed large turnout of male guests’ et al. We, the students, always represented that image with well-ironed short school uniforms and our heads held high.

I lived in boarding house and it was great fun. In fact, I learnt how to look out foe and take decisions for myself in the boarding house.I went into the boarding house young and naïve, but I came out sharp and street smart.

You see, lesbianism didn’t start today o. Oh no, even in Biblical times it has always existed. I, however, came to the knowledge of lesbianism in the boarding house. My school being an all-girls school was very much into lesbianism.

It was called ‘sure’ and the partners were referred to as lovers. Some school mothers and their school daughters turned their relationship from mentorship to lesbianism. It was a big deal then, and if as a junior student you didn’t have a lover you were deemed as being ‘jew’ – an unattractive and inactive person. I was initially curious to know what and how they did their ‘sure’ act, and when those who have experienced it narrated it to me, it just didn’t feel right to me. I believed intimacy was supposed to be between both sexes and not vice versa.

Anyway I kept my thoughts to myself and went about my business, no one wanted me as a ‘supe’. I was too stubborn to the seniors. I would flout school rules and regulations with my friend, and would be the first to report any senior that victimised or intimidated me to the principal – in well spoken English. God help the senior if she did not defend herself in English, as well as I did, the principal would show her pepper.

So, they all hated me and used every opportunity available to flog me. However in my JSS 3, I was almost lured into ‘supe’. It had become a norm amongst my friends, and I was almost the only one who didn’t have a lover.

One of the most beautiful and popular seniors in SS3 approached me after admiring my legs. I promised her I would think about it, because I had my reservations about her due to the rumours about her being possessed by evil spirits.

She persisted, buying me snacks during break, and making sure I ate the best portion of food during dinning hours.  Valentine’s day was approaching, so I decided to give the ‘supe’ thingy a trial. On Valentine’s Day, she sent me the biggest card I had ever seen and a set of lingerie. I was touched. Later that evening I honoured the invitation to her hostel, not knowing that I was going to sleep there. So when I entered the seniors’ hostel, I saw that all the bunk beds had been covered with mosquito nets and then bed sheets. There was practically no way to let air into the bed, I got scared because I can’t stay in a choked environment. She explained that the bed sheets were for privacy. I started wondering how I would breathe through the covering. I quickly lied to her that I hadn’t taken my bath because I thought that I would go back to sleep in my hostel. I begged her to let me go and freshen up and then come back. She agreed. I ran to my hostel and slept there.

She was very angry with me the next day. I apologised to her, promising to repeat the visit, while inwardly wondering how I would get myself out of the mess I was in. Fortunately for me, she woke up very early one morning and sat on the bare floor in front of her hostel. She refused to get up, claiming that she was instructed by her ‘people’ to stay there for the whole day, and indeed she stayed there even in the hot sun. My friends, the kain Ben Johnson wey I do. I ran faster than Usain Bolt and never contacted her again. I was more than relieved when she got another girl in my set as her ‘supe’ and forgot about me.

After that experience, I learnt never to allow myself be influenced by peer pressure or the need to belong. We can’t al  belong in the same place. Some can belong in the sitting room and some can belong in the kitchen.

You can share any tales about your secondary school as well….