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Popular Nigerian OAP and entrepreneur, Toke Makinwa in a recent tweet said that Feminism is not hatred towards the male gender.

She said this in respond to some followers who insinuated that she and Tonto Dike hates men.

Toke replied that she does not hate men, but ‘I hate patriarchy and I speak against “male privileges” ‘

She opined that feminism is speaking against patriarchy, it is inclusion and some men are in support of it.

She tweeted ;

“Know the difference and set yourself free.

Feminism is not hatred towards the male gender, I just can’t stand the male privileges that exists.

It is speaking out against patriarchy, it is inclusion and there are men who support feminism too.”

 

Cardi B, who is one of the four stars to cover Vogue magazine’s January 2020 issues, gave her opinion on feminism. She also explained why she got back with Offset after they broke up.

On feminism, Cardi, whose birth name is Belcalis Marlenis Almánzar, said: “Women always want to talk about feminism and supporting everybody, except if it doesn’t fit your category of what to support.

“Certain women that claim they are feminists only think that a certain type of woman should represent that. Like oh, you have to have a college degree, and you have to fu**ing be, practically, like, a senator, or Mother Teresa, or a Christian holy woman. No, you do not.

“Feminism means being equal to a man, and I am.”

 

Cardi B gives her opinion on feminism as she covers Vogue magazine with her daughter

 

On why she got back with Offset after she separated from him for cheating on her last year, she said: “Everybody has issues. I believe in forgiveness. I prayed on it. Me and my husband, we prayed on it. We had priests come to us. And we just came to an understanding like, bro, it’s really us against the world.”

She added: “He has my back for everything, I have his back for everything, so when you cheat, you’re betraying the person that has your back the most. Why would you do that? We have come to a clear understanding. For me, monogamy is the only way. I’ll beat your a– if you cheat on me.

 

Cardi B gives her opinion on feminism as she covers Vogue magazine with her daughter

 

Addressing fans who weren’t in support of her and Offset getting back together, she said: “When me and my husband got into our issues — you know, he cheated and everything — and I decided to stay with him and work together with him, a lot of people were so mad at me; a lot of women felt disappointed in me.

“But it’s real-life sh**. If you love somebody and you stop being with them, and you’re depressed and social media is telling you not to talk to that person because he cheated, you’re not really happy on the inside until you have the conversation. Then, if you get back with them, it’s like, how could you? You let all of us down.”

Cardi shares her Vogue January 2020 cover with Kulture Kiari Cephas, her 1-year-old daughter with Offset.

 

 

Credit: LIB

Adepeju is a girl development advocate, inspirational writer and a penultimate law student at the University of Lagos. She is passionate about the development of girls . She answers our famous #7questions below;

  1. What is your biggest fear?

I believe fear is part of life and I have a number of them. Life is full of distractions thus, my biggest fear  is to become lost in the ocean of life. That is, losing focus and losing myself.

  1. In your darkest moments, what do you do?

I like to be alone. This may be for some days or hours before i turn to my support system. Sometimes, I speak with my mum, friends or siblings.

  1. What is that one thing you will like to change about yourself?

Sometimes, I wish I could more versatile than I am at present. My strength lies more in scholastic activities than in artistic things. I wish I could be more artistic.

  1. Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?

I have numerous 5 year goals.

Firstly, i want to have started my legal career in a reputable international organization. This will be coupled with my ability to compete globally.

Then, I want to have reached out to more people in need. Girls, women, orphans among others.

Similarly, i want to have multiplied my network.Then yes, i want to have travelled to certain countries in the world.

5. What keeps you going?

What keeps me going has been my hope for a better tomorrow. A number of times when I am faced with  challenges, I ask if everything will make sense eventually. With time, I have built my confidence around the belief that amidst the tempest, the ship will get to harbour.

6. What is your stand on feminism? Do you consider yourself a feminist?

Feminism started as a journey to liberate women and give them certain rights. Nowadays, what I see is women hating and competing with men. I hear so many views such as willingness to abort male foetus. The concept of feminism has now been polluted. I do not consider myself a feminist. I prefer to say that I am a Girl Development Advocate.

7. What keeps you up at night?

The thought that when things need to be done, I should not wait for others to do them. Rather, I should get them done.I am only able to sleep when I’m satisfied that jobs have been well done.

Send a mail to info@womenofrubies.com to participate in our #7questions

Chimamanda Adichie has advised women to do whatever pleases them including wearing whatever they like. 

She made this known during an interview with CNN‘s special program on Africa, ‘African Voices.’ The award-winning author said it is important that women do not have to do anything to please anyone.

“Wear what you want to wear. I say that as kind of a joke. But in a larger sense, I think it would be, don’t think you have to do what people want you to do. Increasingly, in part of growing older for me, I’m 41, and when I was 30, when I was 27, I think I was a lot more invested in kind of thinking about what people expected and what people wanted. And I think it’s mentally exhausting to do that. 

“And, you take away from yourself, the energy that you could have used to do things that are actually meaningful to you. Now, I feel old and wise and I would say to that younger version of myself, and actually, I’ll say also to young women all over the world to, it’s so important not to think that you have to perform for somebody else. It’s really important to, what I like to call own yourself,” she said.

 

Credit: pulse.ng

With her husband, Prince Harry as the President and their new baby on the way, the Duchess will highlight the Trust’s partnerships with young people across the Commonwealth, most especially its work supporting women and girls in her new prestigious role.

Meghan joined a special panel discussion of female thought-leaders and activists convened by The Queen’s Commonwealth Trust to mark the appointment and celebrate International Women’s Day. They also discussed various issues affecting women today.

Kensington Palace

@KensingtonRoyal

On The Duchess of Sussex has become Vice-President of The Queen’s Commonwealth Trust.

The @QueensComTrust, of which The Queen is Patron and The Duke of Sussex is President, exists to champion, fund and connect young leaders around the world

Queen’s CW Trust@queenscomtrust

We are delighted to announce that as of today The Duchess of Sussex will take on the role of Vice-President for The Queen’s Commonwealth Trust.
Please join us is welcoming Her Royal Highness to #TeamQCT@KensingtonRoyal

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Kensington Palace added:

“THE QUEEN’S COMMONWEALTH TRUST, WHICH THE QUEEN IS PATRON AND THE DUKE OF SUSSEX IS PRESIDENT, EXISTS TO CHAMPION, FUND AND CONNECT YOUNG LEADERS AROUND THE WORLD.”

Members Of The Royal Family Attend Events To Mark The Centenary Of The RAF

Nicola Brentnall, chief executive, said:

“WE ARE PARTICULARLY DELIGHTED THAT THE FIRST OPPORTUNITY OF FORMALLY WORKING TOGETHER WITH HER ROYAL HIGHNESS COMES ON INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY. THIS SQUARES PERFECTLY WITH OUR FOCUS ON AMPLIFYING THE WORK AND CONTRIBUTION OF THOSE FURTHEST AWAY FROM POWER. WOMEN ACROSS THE COMMONWEALTH AND THE GLOBE OFTEN FACE THE BIGGEST IMPEDIMENTS TO SUCCESS. SO WE ARE DELIGHTED TO HAVE OUR VICE-PRESIDENT’S SUPPORT IN HELPING OTHERS TO OVERCOME THOSE OBSTACLES.”

At the Women’s Day panel, Meghan Markle was joined by model and founder of Gurls Talk Adwoa Aboah, Chair of Global Institute for Women’s Leadership at King’s College London Julia Guillard, Chrisann Jarrett, founder of Let Us Learn, and Angeline Murimirwa, Executive Director Campaign for Female Education.

At the panel, Meghan Markle mentioned that she’d love for her baby to be a feminist.

The Duchess said:

“I’D SEEN THIS DOCUMENTARY ON NETFLIX ABOUT FEMINISM AND ONE OF THE THINGS THEY SAID DURING PREGNANCY WAS ‘I FEEL THE EMBRYONIC KICKING OF FEMINISM’ I LOVE THAT. SO BOY OR GIRL OR WHATEVER IT IS, WE HOPE THAT THAT’S THE CASE WITH OUR LITTLE BUMP.”

This is not be the first time Meghan Markle will be involved in issues concerning women globally. She has been on this mission since 2014, and has also worked for the United Nations’ Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women.

Watch the highlight of the Women’s Day panel:

US publishing company Merriam-Webster has named the noun its Word of the Year for 2018, after it saw a 74% spike in look-ups compared with 2017.

“The concept of justice was at the center of many of our national debates in the past year: racial justice, social justice, criminal justice, economic justice. In any conversation about these topics, the question of just what exactly we mean when we use the term justice is relevant, and part of the discussion” the company said when explaining its choice.

“Justice” was among the most-consulted words on Merriam-Webster’s website throughout the year, the company said, and saw jumps in search volume in the wake of numerous news stories.

“Justice” takes the Word of the Year title from last year’s winner, “feminism.” Other words that saw large jumps in look-ups included “Laurel,” which was at the heart of a viral debate over a short piece of audio in May, and “respect,” which spiked in searches after the death of the “Queen of Soul,” Aretha Franklin, in August.

 

Credit: LIB

A woman is a person,” Nollywood actress Nse Ikpe-Etim writes in an Instagram post, letting everyone know womanhood is not contingent of motherhood.

Not all women will be mothers, she shared, some because they are unable to and others because they don’t want to. This doesn’t make them any less of a woman, she shared.

A woman is a person. A person who can decide what she wants to do with her body or her time.

So, it is extremely ignorant to expect all women to eventually be mothers.

There are many reasons why a woman may not have children.

Infertility is more common than we know and to immediately ask a woman why she doesn’t have a child is extremely insensitive.

There are also women who have chosen to not have children simply because they will not put their bodies through pregnancy. They simply do not want to have kids and this is perfectly okay.

Whatever a woman decides to do – to have babies or to not; or whether they are battling infertility is no one’s business.

Happiness is all that matters. Gratefully, it is absolutely free.

My prayer and hope is that one day we will not judge unfairly unmarried or childless women.

That being said, if children will make you happy, I pray that you have loads of them.

If you do not want or cannot have kids, remember that you can still find joy and do not allow anybody make you feel less.

Enjoy life. Breathe freely and enjoy all the beauty in the world.

For me, love and light are the truth and all I ever want is to live in happiness and pure truth.

Recently, award-winning author and feminist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie in an interview with the UK Guardian came out to say that she would be more successful in Nigeria if she is not a feminist.

“Feminism is not that hot. I can tell you I would sell more books in Nigeria if I stopped and said I’m no longer a feminist. I would have a stronger following, I would make more money” she said.

She is spot on in this case. Feminism in Nigeria is an endangered movement or belief; it is associated with so much bile, prejudice and stigmatisation. You are either ascribed to one or more of the following stereotypes; man-haters, angry nasty women, pro-abortionists, homosexual or pseudo homosexual, unmarried or a career woman, anti-motherhood ,an atheist, unbeliever, a bad wife or an amoral woman. . .

A little over a year ago, Senator Biodun Olujimi sponsored a bill to seek redress on gender parity issues which purpose was to permit women to have equal rights with men in marriages, education, property rights and employment etc. As we all know it was met with strong opposition based on cultural, political and religious colourations.

Is this the right way to swing? I leave that to your judgement.
According to the World Bank in 2015, the women population in Nigeria stood at 49.07%. Yes, almost half of our population are women; and the sad reality is that large factions of these women are handicapped socially, medically, politically and economically. Factually speaking,  we should highlight and enforce women rights in our country if we truly seek redress on our economic productivity, improved sustainable development. We should ensure that our policies are more representative for a more holistic effect in the society. Are we deliberately going to leave this faction of our populace undervalued, defenceless, faceless, unemployable and underpowered? In which case they are more vulnerable to abuse, poverty, health issues and even death.

Nigeria is a signatory to the Maputo Protocol otherwise known as The Protocol to the African Charter on Human and Peoples Rights on the Rights of Women in Africa. This guarantees comprehensive rights to women and propagates gender parity in core areas which would further empower the African woman. This seeks to address pertinent challenges affecting the girl child and women in Africa, which have been relegated to the background for too long. It has consequently hindered the growth and empowerment of these women. In so many ways, their dreams are caught short as soon as the doctors declare their sex in the labour room.

These issues such as child marriage/early marriage, domestic violence, female genital mutilation (FGM), stigmatisation, gender pay gap, rape culture, marginalization of all forms, denial of property rights and inheritance, etc. are familiar occurrences in our society which affects girls and women. They fight these battles silently and the least that we could do is empathize, commiserate and sensitize these issues. But alas, our silence is just another web in the tangling and vicious cycle.

According to Wikipedia, feminism is a range of political movements, ideologies, and social movements that share a common goal: to define and advance political, economic, personal, and social rights for women. This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment.

What it means to be a feminist in Iceland or Rwanda which are of the world’s best countries in terms of gender equality, is very different from what it means to be a feminist in Semen, Syria of even Nigeria. This is why feminism is a relative concept and a ready tool which could be used to advocate and propagate women rights that we require in our society  – to enable women to assume their full potential and prospects.

It would be truly amiss for me as a typical Nigerian not to highlight the religious/ cultural angle that casts a shadow on the propagation of women rights in our country. Religion and cultural norms play a huge role on our stance on so many issues, as such most antagonists usually use this premise to expound why women rights should not be enforced or just given the cursory lip service. But then should this be a justification to hamper our development? Especially as it can be clearly seen that the lack of / enforcement of such rights are detrimental to our women and future generations yet unborn.

It’s truly amusing when certain individuals try to besmirch women rights and associate the affiliation of such rights to the breakdown of nuclear family, home values and the dynamics of marriage in general. It is perceived as a threat to the stability and dynamics of the family.

I would argue that this would in fact create a more stable, well balanced homestead; in most heterosexual societies women are wives, homemakers, mothers, breadwinners etc, whose roles in building the future and society cannot be overstated. So in that vein, why shouldn’t they be empowered in all spheres of life according to their capacities and abilities instead of the norm of limiting the scope of what they can even dream about?
I ask again why not?

So when people ask me why I am a feminist in Nigeria. These are my reasons as stated above and so much more. I simply choose not to be silent. I am a Christian first, a feminist second and both at the same time. (I will elucidate on this in another article.)

I stand with women rights. What about you?

Source: Bellanaija

Now, this LONG POST is not to fight any gender unless you would rather perceive it that way. I am unapologetic over this post please note. I have never been apologetic over any of my posts anyway.

I am yet to see a man who does not have a female in his life be it his daughter, mother, cousin or even a friend, so it would be very awkward if anyone interprets this post as a fight against men.

It is still January, it’s a new year, this is the time we really need to be hitting hard on very serious and sensitive matters lest this year ends the same way it has always been for many Nigerian women. . Why do we avoid telling ourselves some hard truth no matter how uncomfortable they may sound?

Listen and listen good, In Nigeria, a stay at home mum has dug her own grave already. Are such women for real at all? Listen o, no matter how good a man is, a woman who is totally dependent on her husband in 2017 is a sorry case.

Let me say this, when I was in the Banking industry working as a marketer, 99% of the married men who opened an account through me didn’t use their wives as next of kin. I was forced to ask some of them at some point why they didn’t do that? Their reason,” Ah! If they died, the woman will marry another man”.

I asked – So if you die, who will take care of the kid(s) you left for the woman? They all had no answers.Many Nigerian men hardly have long term plans for their immediate families but their wives are still playing the dutiful wives.

Death is inevitable, a man can die first, a woman can also die first,. In a situation where the man is the sole provider how do such women intend to cope with the kids? They will turn into beggars abi? In Nigeria, most times the moment a man dies, whether he left a will or not, his greedy family members can swoop on his assets. It is pathetic that Nigerian women who can’t mention the topic of writing a will to their husbands, they cant even suggest joint ownership of everything are still the same women who fight with all their might to stay married at all cost in a marriage where there is no future for them, worse still, they prefer to be stay at home mums.

Apart from this death thing, here in Nigeria, a man can take as many wives as he want even the ones married under the statutory law, let us not deceive ourselves as if we have not seen it happen time and time again. Or is it from my mouth you’ll be hearing it for the first time that a man married under the statutory law took another wife and nothing happened? Nigerian women don’t sue their husbands for bigamy because they don’t want to be “husband-less” Don’t blame them, it is because Nigerian women are required to approach the gates of heaven with a penis in one hand. .

So when a woman is totally dependent on the man, how would she be able to sort herself out if it is a messy situation she can’t condone? Mfon Abia Effiong wrote on a post and I agree, “Money is a defense”

The last time I checked, Nigeria is still a patriarchal society. Any woman of sound mind who took her time to look through that gender equality bill which our Senators rejected would know that Nigerian women are in “one chance.” What do we spend our time doing sef? Gossiping and back biting even though it doesn’t better your lives when there are real issues which women should focus their attention on. The average Nigerian woman fights to protect her marriage at all cost yet that same marriage she spends all her life fighting for, she is just like a tenant there. Go argue with the rejected bill on gender equality.If you want a copy, I have the pdf one with me.

In Nigeria, if any party should be a stay at home Parent, it should be the man, until women have equal rights as men. Otherwise, in the event of whatever, she stands to lose everything.

Do we think our Senators who rejected that bill were sleeping when they did that? They won’t want to approve that kind of bill because it protects Nigerian women and they don’t want that. They know whether a woman works or not, she has the same rights as the man of the home. They know everything he has ever worked for in his life also belongs to his wife. These things were stated clearly in that bill.

In fact, that gender equality bill would have protected stay at home mums and I would be very willing to advocate that women stay at home and take care of their tender kids as a child rights Advocate since women have nothing to loose, but until then, any woman staying at home regardless if it is her decision or not has dug her own grave already. .

Please don’t come and be writing blablbalablbla here because we prefer to deceive ourselves You are free to “test the waters” with any decision you make as a woman but be very ready to face the consequences.

In this life, a human being of sound mind should be able to think positively and negatively at the same time and we should deploy means of how we won’t fall Victims, most especially if you are resident in a Country like Nigeria and you are a woman.

A Nigerian woman’s brain must be functioning like a wall clock, working every second, you cant afford to “na ge re” (translate in English yourself)

Credit : Bukola’s Facebook Account