Author - Women of Rubies

In Inspiration March 29, 2024 By Esther Ijewere

Hon. Justice Mabel T. Segun Bello: Beacon of Legal Brilliance and Leadership

In the field of justice, there exist individuals whose careers radiate with brilliance, serving as beacons for others to emulate. Hon. Justice Mabel T. Segun-Bello stands prominently among these distinguished figures, acclaimed not only for her profound expertise as an adjudicator but also for her captivating persona as an inspirational speaker and educator. Let us explore the exceptional voyage of this experienced adjudicator, accomplished author, skilled arbitrator, and adept mediator.

Early Life and Education

Born on the 20th of April in Zaria, Kaduna State, Justice Mabel Segun-Bello embarked on her educational journey that spanned primary, secondary, and tertiary institutions in Ilorin, Kwara State, and Jos, Plateau State. Her academic pursuits laid a solid foundation for her future endeavors, shaping her into the remarkable individual she is today.

Professional Ascension

Justice Mabel’s ascent in the legal arena began with her call to the Nigerian Bar in January 2001. Under the tutelage of the notable Prince Lateef O. Fagbemi, SAN, she honed her skills at L.O. Fagbemi, SAN & Co. Temitope Chambers. Her quest for knowledge and diverse experiences led her to a brief stint in the banking sector, where she gleaned specialized skills in risk asset management and credit administration.

Transitioning back to the legal sphere, Justice Mabel held various leadership positions, including Vice President of the Law Students’ Society at the University of Ilorin and Treasurer and later Financial Secretary of the Magistrates Association of Nigeria (MAN) in Abuja. Her dedication and expertise garnered recognition, earning her awards for outstanding leadership and impact.

Judicial Career

In April 2022, Justice Mabel’s illustrious career reached new heights with her appointment as a Judge of the Federal High Court of Nigeria. Prior to this appointment, she served diligently as a Magistrate and District Court Judge with the FCT High Court of Justice Abuja for 18 years. Her tenure saw her rise to the position of Chief Magistrate and later as Deputy Chief Registrar and Director for Oaths, where she pioneered the first-ever Digital Affidavit Registry Management System (ARMS) in the Nigerian Judiciary.

Beyond the Bench

Justice Mabel’s impact extends beyond the courtroom. She is a member of prestigious organizations such as Rotary International, advocating for peace, education, and sanitation. Her commitment to continuous learning is evident through her memberships in the Chartered Institute of Arbitrators and the Institute of Chartered Mediators and Conciliators.

As a sought-after conference speaker, Justice Mabel imparts her wisdom on soft skills and specialized training, leaving a lasting impression on diverse audiences. Additionally, her contributions to the Faculty of GOTNI Leadership Center and her authorship of the book “Handbook on Common Court Orders and Directives” underscore her dedication to leadership development and legal guidance.

Personal Life

Beyond her professional achievements, Justice Mabel finds joy in her family life. Happily married to Dr. Olusegun Bello, a medical doctor, she is blessed with three children who undoubtedly inspire her pursuit of excellence.

In conclusion, Justice Mabel T. Segun-Bello exemplifies the epitome of a trailblazer in law and leadership. Her journey is a testament to resilience, dedication, and the relentless pursuit of justice both inside and outside the courtroom. As she continues to inspire and empower others, her legacy will undoubtedly endure for generations to come.

In Career Gems December 1, 2023 By Women of Rubies

Women Of Rubies Quarterly Media Visibility BootCamp: Meet The Fireside Chat Speakers

We’re excited to announce a highlight of our Women of Rubies Media Visibility BootCamp: a captivating Fireside Chat with distinguished speakers renowned for their influential work across various sectors. These industry leaders are true icons, ready to share their profound insights and inspiring journeys with us.

This exclusive dialogue is set to take place on December 18, culminating in the BootCamp experience. Register here to be a part of this enlightening session and the entire BootCamp. Don’t miss the chance to connect with and learn from these industry titans!

Azeezat Adejare: Lawyer and Culinary Entrepreneur

Azeezat Adejare is a figure of legal understanding and culinary innovation. A licensed attorney, she has woven her expertise through the fabric of legal practice, earning recognition for her commitment to justice and client advocacy. Beyond the courtroom, Azeezat has embraced her passion for African cuisine, establishing herself as a culinary entrepreneur. She is a pioneer in redefining and promoting African food, intertwining cultural heritage with contemporary taste, garnering her admiration within the culinary community.

Her achievements span diverse realms, reflecting her multifaceted interests and capabilities. Azeezat’s journey is a testament to her versatility and dedication, breaking stereotypes and fostering community through her dual pursuits. Her work has garnered attention, positioning her as a community pillar elevating African cuisine and advocating for legal empowerment.

Chinanza Favour Youth Ambassador and Author

Chinanza Favour is a distinguished Youth Ambassador and Author whose work has made a substantial impact in the realms of personal transformation and global empowerment. Hailing from Nigeria, she has become a beacon of inspiration for her dedication to fostering positive change and uplifting communities.

Chinaza is a Youth Ambassador who advocates for education, leadership, and personal development. She also works towards gender equality and youth empowerment at local and international levels. as an author and in youth empowerment, she highlights her commitment to positively impacting the world, especially among young people seeking personal growth and global empowerment.

Wendy Wintech: Content Creator and Youtuber

Wendy, or Chyluv, is an award-winning tech professional with a decade of experience. She serves as a Senior Agile Business Analyst at a major North American logistics company and is a Program Manager at BlackTECH. Wendy is passionate about bridging gender inequality in the tech industry and has earned recognition, including the Community Champion Award and Women in Tech Excellence Award. She holds a degree in Computer Science and a master’s in Human Capital Management, with expertise in Business Development, Agile Business Analysis, Strategy, and Content Creation. Wendy is also certified in several areas. She values quality time with her family, including her spouse and four children.

Rinret Gofwan: Mental Health Expert

Rinret Gofwan, an expert in behavioral change and emotional well-being, specializes in trauma therapy, emotional intelligence coaching, and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). With a strong educational background, she holds degrees from the University of Abuja, the University of Jos, and the University of Maiduguri, including a Master’s in International Relations and Strategic Studies. Rinret is also the visionary founding director of the Miriam Gofwan Women and Children Foundation.

Emily Wale-koya: Women’s Empowerment Coach

Emily Wale-Koya is a renowned figure in personal branding and online entrepreneurship. With a background in law, Emily transitioned into the digital space and has since made a significant impact. She created the School of Personal Branding to assist people in uncovering and optimizing their brands.

Emily’s accomplishments are notable. She has successfully coached and mentored numerous individuals, empowering them to transform their online presence into profitable ventures. She empowers women through Women of Rubies by sharing insights and experiences.

Emily Wale-Koya’s LinkedIn profile showcases her extensive personal branding and entrepreneurship expertise. Her impressive achievements include turning dreams into 7-figure realities, a testament to her dedication and proficiency in the field. Her journey from law to digital entrepreneurship exemplifies the power of reinvention and the pursuit of one’s passion to succeed in the ever-evolving online landscape.

In Inspiration October 22, 2023 By Esther Ijewere

Chinaza Favour: A Beacon Of Inspiration For Personal Transformation And Global Empowerment

In a world teeming with potential and aspiring individuals, there are those who stand out as beacons of inspiration. Chinaza Favour is undeniably one of them. Her journey is a testament to her unwavering dedication to personal transformation, positive social change, and the empowerment of individuals worldwide.

An Author with Impact

Chinaza Favour is not just an accomplished author; she’s a life changer. Her books, ‘Who Are You, Really?’ and ‘Dear Young One,’ have touched the lives of over 15,000 youths across the globe. These aren’t just words on pages; they are catalysts for profound personal transformation.

Youth Ambassador and Brand Ambassador

Chinaza serves as the Youth Ambassador of the La Roche Leadership Foundation, an organization founded by the esteemed former governor of Lagos State, Dr. Akinwunmi Ambode. Her influence also extends to being a brand ambassador for WORITAL, one of Africa’s leading publishing companies. In 2023, RRANA recognized her as one of the top 100+ authors in Nigeria.

Nurturing Literary Talent

Her deep appreciation for art and literature is evident in her annual literary contest. This initiative rewards and spotlights the exceptional literary talents of artists, nurturing the geniuses of the literary world.

Passionate Mental Health Advocate

Chinaza’s advocacy extends to mental health awareness. She’s on a mission to destigmatize therapy and other forms of mental health intervention, a cause that’s more critical than ever in today’s world.

Modest Fashion Model

As a modest fashion model, she elegantly showcases the beauty of decency. She proudly embraces her African roots and inspires other young African women to do the same, without feeling inferior to other races.

Awards and Recognitions

Her contributions to youth development have earned her numerous accolades. In 2022, she was recognized as an Illustrious Writer in Personal Development and Academia by BEWA Africa. She was named the 2022 Outstanding Young Personality of the Year by TIBA and received the Industry Leader of the Year award from CWIN Africa. In 2023, Chinaza was honored with the prestigious Impact Women in Leadership Award by the Women In Leadership hub, among several other accolades.

Restoring Hope and Compassion

Chinaza’s overarching goal is to restore hope, love, and compassion to humanity. She firmly believes that we can change the world one person at a time, and her mantras reflect this: ‘Healing for the world begins with healing within us,’ and ‘You are, because we all are,’ drawing inspiration from the Ubuntu Philosophy.

Chinaza Favour is not just a writer and speaker; she’s a beacon of inspiration, guiding the way towards a brighter, more connected, and empowered world.

You can connect with Chinaza Favour on her social media platforms:

In Inspiration September 2, 2023 By Esther Ijewere

Margaret Aligbe: A Journey Of Empowerment From Scholar To Published Author

Margaret Ojochide Aligbe is a graduate of Kogi State University and Uppsala University, Sweden (MSc in Sustainable Development), currently pursuing a Ph.D. in Transdisciplinary Sustainability at Memorial University of Newfoundland, Canada. An enthusiastic foodie with a penchant for chronicling everyday tales, she’s a versatile reader spanning various genres and is now a recognized author. Her compositions grace platforms such as BusinessDay Nigeria, The Eco-Instigator, Bella Naija, and more.

Margaret boasts a diverse background in community development, social enterprise, project management, data analytics, communications, and content creation. Driven by a fervour for community growth and tangible sustainability, she’s a beacon of inspiration. Explore her work and musings on her website: https://www.skinfullybooked.com/

Her latest creation, “Candid Conversations: Life. Lessons. Growth,” draws from personal dialogues and life encounters that have profoundly influenced her journey. Delving into subjects like social media, navigating life as a Black international student in three distinct nations (Nigeria, Sweden, and Canada), securing a full scholarship for postgraduate studies overseas after turning 35 with family commitments, adapting to life as a Nigerian abroad with insights for personal growth, all while harmonizing motherhood, marriage, and defying odds to triumph.

This insightful book is now available on Amazon in both paperback and hardcover editions.

Childhood Influence

Yes, all my life I have always loved reading, writing and traveling. I am the type of person you could easily connect with just by talking about reading and books. So yes, somewhere in my childhood and adulthood, there is a bridge that connects the dreams I had and the goals I am pursuing now.

Leaving Nigeria for Studies Abroad

I left Nigeria to study abroad for the first time in 2019, even though I had gone on tourist trips, this was the first time I was going on something related to a long-term goal. The journey to Sweden was an answered prayer as I have always wanted to go back to school after my first degree in 2007/2008. But being a married woman with children and being over 35, a lot of opportunities are limited, so you have to dig deeper, and work extra smarter for spaces and opportunities that have room for women like me. Hence, in 2019.

I got the Swedish Institute Scholarship for Global Professionals (SISGP) to pursue my Master’s degree in Sustainable Development at Uppsala University Sweden. This was after my second attempt and since then I have gone on to win other scholarships and fellowships.

Academic Journey Across Different Countries

My background in community development work is intertwined with sustainability. This was the foundation of my work in Nigeria, Sweden and Canada. Anyone who does NGO work understands the importance of the Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) and its practical application and measuring the impact. This includes being able to show the work you do and applying for grants and connecting with donors/partners. While back in Nigeria, a lot of these sustainability-related issues were more of theory than practical.

We continue to talk about the SDGs but there is still so much to do in practically bringing it to life, and seeing the sustained impact in the life of the people at the bottom of the social economic ladder. (This is a space where the knowledge I now have is useful, I am still looking for opportunities to apply my knowledge in Nigeria and people to partner with).

Hence, it became important for me to begin my graduate studies abroad in 2019 in the field of sustainability in Sweden; a country known for how advanced its systems are and how well they continue to score high on the yearly sustainable development index. The experience allowed me to better understand the challenges we face in Nigeria regarding issues of community development, and gain practical knowledge of sustainability because living in Sweden was me living it daily.

My Book “Candid Conversations” and Its Impact

One major conversation is the limited opportunities for women over 35 years and even more difficult for married women with children. Too many opportunities are pegged at 18-35. Many business competitions in Nigeria, mentorship competitions, job opportunities and the like. Once you are outside that age bracket, you have to either start on your own or continue to digger even deeper for very rare opportunities, but they exist. The experience became a catalyst to seek funded study opportunities abroad.

My Passion for Sharing My Experiences

I have written about my scholarship journey being a married woman of over 35 with children; climate change impact, Carbon footprints of wars, flooding, Nigeria’s sachet economy and life as an international student. I tend to write about topics that I have practical relevance and sometimes, on topics I have experienced because I don’t struggle with putting the words to paper and I can put them in a better context.

Integrating my Various Skills into My Current Pursuits and Projects

The field of community development and sustainability is a perfect space to bring these skills to action. It is a field that combines broad interdisciplinary collaboration in dealing with complex problems which different in each context. The skills I have allow me to be versatile across roles and partners, an essential requirement in bridging research, policy and practice. My present research in transdisciplinary sustainability is aimed at looking beyond a siloed approach to research and collaboration. Hence, all these skills combined are been vital for my Ph.D. journey and for thriving professionally in Canada.

The Motivation Behind my Website; “Skinfully Booked

After all the recent drama with social media, I decided that I would get a website where I can connect with people with or without social media because as a user, you basically cannot dictate anything. The owners can just wake up and add or remove a feature that could impact your engagement on the platform but there is little to nothing you can do other than rant. So, I designed and launched my website https://www.skinfullybooked.com/ myself in early 2023.

The decision has proven to be positive as I can now show my portfolio outside social media, building my subscriber community both online and offline. Also, I have just launched my store embedded on my website. The website has allowed me to better amplify the skilfully booked brand I am building.

My Journey as a Black international student across three countries

I would say racism and being the only Black person in some spaces; this is a fight in progress. Coming to terms with racism as a Nigerian who moved abroad, not for tourism as an adult was new for me. Defining racism based on your experience, like finding the right words for what you feel is a learning process, and it takes time to recognize what racism and othering people only because of their skin colour means. To read the signs, allow yourself to feel the trauma; to be better equipped to deal with it instead of being positively blinded by the japa rave; to feel like because you want a greener pasture then you can bear discrimination, no matter how much your rights are trampled upon. Because how much can you take? How long will you continue to suck up knowing that you become just an EDI statistic and when you hustle, there is already a system designed to cap your rise as a Black person.

The other challenge would be juggling children and academics. I have been blessed with the gift of extended family when I first moved abroad alone leaving my children and husband behind before my nuclear family came to join me. The experience was really difficult being separated but the end goal remained a motivation for all of us. My husband is also supportive which allows me to attend conferences, do some work and school. I can practically chase my dreams as a married woman, and I am blessed that my husband supports my dreams. I also had a baby during my MSc in Sweden but since it was not my first, I was able to manage the emotions of pregnancy, nursing a baby and still graduate in good time.

The Women Who Inspire Me

I have many women who inspire me, but I would mention these three below.

Myself: I am a self-starter and this has been one of my biggest blessings because self-inspiration as a life-long skill has been helpful while I was living in Nigeria with all the “over 35years woman” challenges, navigating opportunities abroad, finding scholarships, jobs and coping with failures.

Luvvie Ajayi Jones because of her style of writing awaken my inner genius to act on my dreams and deal with Imposter syndrome.

Viola Davis because she inspires me to genuine self-love in my Black skin, own my journey and be compassionate towards myself no matter how messed up it gets.

Work-life Balance

Once children are involved you have to wear your multitasking hat to be able to juggle successfully. I work with a schedule, and I am task oriented. So, knowing what I need to do at specific times with deadlines helps me to stay organized. I also, I am a very spontaneous person, it allows me to act on my goals without overthinking.

Plans for the Future

My goal is to finish my Ph.D. and make the Skinfully Booked brand more visible and profitable. I also would love to collaborate with people in Nigeria and other parts of the world in the field of community development and projects aimed at bringing the SDGs to life. I mean projects that are sustainability-inclined seeking real impact and real people.

You can connect with me on my website: https://www.skinfullybooked.com/

Also on Twitter and Instagram: @madeeveryday

In Inspiration March 27, 2023 By Women of Rubies

Esther Enewerome Odafe: Writing A Brilliant Book Involves A Lot Of Research

A notable Author once said; “There is no friend as loyal as a book”. Reading is like a voyage through time, the more that you read, the more things you will know. We can’t downplay the culture of reading, and authors who write and curate the contents we digest.

Award-winning Amazon bestselling author, Esther Enewerome Odafe is one of such authors promoting reading culture, and also helping professionals, entrepreneurs, organizations, and individuals fulfill their dreams of becoming published authors.

The famous writer has worked with local and international clients to birth top-notch quality books that reflect their personal or business brands with 0% plagiarism. Her passion for equipping individuals with the right knowledge and skill set for decent work and economic development in line with the Sustainable Development Goals (SDG 8) has led her to birth a Facebook community of passionate and talented individuals who want to earn from their skills and grow their businesses.

Esther was shortlisted for the 2018 African Writer’s Award- Flash fiction category and; the 2020 SME100 Nigeria 25Under25 Awards- Creative Writing & Content Creation category; and her book won the 2021 Bookney Book of the Year Award.

She is also the founder of The Midas Touch Literary Services and co-founder of Bookney. Her works have appeared in local and international magazines, blogs, and television programs including Writers Space Africa magazine, Freelancers magazine, and Patabah books blog

She shares her inspiring journey with Esther Ijewere in this exclusive and insightful interview.

Childhood Influence

Growing up, my parents would buy me storybooks to read, and I believe it was their way of helping me to cultivate a reading habit. The great thing about reading is that it sharpens your mind and makes you want to bring your imagination to life through writing. Today, as a ghostwriter, writing a brilliant book involves a lot of research, which has to do with intensive reading. So, yes, my childhood prepared me for what I do.

The inspiration behind Bookney and From Hobby To Career Africa

Bookney was founded by me and Precious Osikha in 2020. In 2019, we noticed many authors complained about intellectual property theft, people selling their books and making money off them. This was what prompted us to start a unique and safe platform for book reading and publishing with better incentives for both authors and readers. I started the Facebook group, From Hobby to Career Africa out of a passion for equipping individuals with the right knowledge and skill set for decent work and economic development in line with the Sustainable Development Goals (SDG 8). My goal is to help passionate and talented individuals who want to earn from their skills and grow their businesses.

The journey so far

It has been an interesting journey so far, but not without challenges. However, persistence and seeing the bigger picture of my dreams have kept me going.

Being an author, ghostwriter, editor, and managing all the hats I wear

For me, it all boils down to knowing what jobs to take and how to arrange my schedule. Anytime I feel pumped to work, I do all the ‘heavy-lifting’ jobs and reserve the more fun ones for when I am lethargic and need an energy boost.

The ripple effect of training 100 newbie writers

This is certainly one of the most fulfilling things I have done. Getting testimonials and seeing milestones from past students about how they have put the training to use either by working for companies or running their businesses makes me happy. Also, helping clients who never thought they could become authors write their books and become bestsellers is fulfilling.

Challenges of my work

The major challenge for me would be meeting several deadlines around the same time. As someone who wears many hats, jobs come in at different times with varying deadlines. Sometimes they are so close, that it becomes hectic meeting those deadlines.

3 women who inspire me and why

My mum is my number one inspiration because of how resilient she is. The next person would be Esther Ijewere for her doggedness in helping people notwithstanding the outcome. Last but not the least, I would say to myself because of how determined I am to achieve my dreams.

Nuggets on how to become a successful ghostwriter and editor

The first thing I would recommend is to love knowledge. Whichever way you want to gain knowledge about new things is up to you although, I would recommend reading wide as your best shot. Also, develop the habit of being meticulous if you are not because you need this trait to deliver excellent work. Finally, learn the act of marketing your services and closing sales because, without sales, you are just not in business.

Being a Woman of Rubies

I am a woman of rubies because I am valuable, strong, and giving. Every business venture I have started, every book I have written, has all been intending

Contact details;

Social media handles:

Instagram: @enewerome

Facebook: Esther Enewerome Odafe-Ohakah

Email: contact@estherenewerome.com

www.estherenewerome.com

In Inspiration July 27, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

#MondayMotivation | 5 Ways To Gain Better Control Of Your Life

Achieving personal goals feels great. However, failing to achieve them can deal a massive blow to our egos. After all, this failure is personal, and it often makes us question our own convictions. Of course, every life is filled with failures: some are not too severe, and some are valuable lessons, but failures make us feel weak, powerless, and demotivated.

When things don’t go as we planned, we start to experience this lack of control, and that is truly depressing. It affects how we behave; it prevents us from being happy, and we feel stressed out as a result of all the self-doubt we are experiencing. Luckily, these problems are not beyond solution, and you can conquer this weakness one step at a time.

Learn to accept yourself and give yourself some more credit.

You need to know that every trait you possess can be viewed from both a negative and a positive perspective. If you consider yourself to be determined, and if you do not give up easily, other people might perceive this trait as stubbornness. If you are ambitious, others might call you greedy, whereas if you are humble, they might say that you lack ambition. Abandon the notion that you can become someone that everybody will admire, and focus on being someone you would admire. If you try to impress everyone, you’ll end up forsaking yourself and, as mentioned, these personal failures are far more disappointing. It’s a truth as old as humanity itself: we have our own vision of ourselves, while others have a different perception, and the truth is somewhere in between. In other words, do not take criticism too seriously, and do not be self-absorbed all the time; just learn to accept yourself, and only work on the flaws that you truly wish to eliminate.

Learn how to handle your finances.

Another reason why we might feel stressed out and powerless is when we have trouble handling our finances. When you start to live your own life, there are unexpected expenses that pop up each month, and since these expenses can easily lead to debt, you need to think ahead and save money for those occasions. Whether we want to admit it or not, money is also a form of power, and without it, we feel less secure and less confident. If you are stressed out because of your finances, there are two solutions. You can see what you can do to earn more money; you can ask for a higher paycheck at work, and see what the requirements are; or, you can simply learn how to redistribute your spending budget. Sit down and calculate how much money you need to pay the bills, and then see how much money you have left and create your daily budget based on that number.

Add more organization to your life.

When you feel a lack of control over your life, then you can combat it with a grain of OCD. Start to organize everything you can. It was already mentioned how you can organize your finances and how to earn money by selling things you don’t use. However, you can take this a step further and reorganize your home and daily schedule. The main reasons why this is useful is because you’ll feel a lot better when you are in a well-organized environment, and unexpected problems and obligations are less likely to sneak up on you when you monitor things more adequately.

One thing is certain though: you will feel so much better if your entire living space is neatly organized and if everything feels in its place. Plus, you’ll be motivated to maintain that order, since you worked hard on building it.

Work on self-improvement.

Self-improvement can imply a lot of things. It can mean a change in your governing philosophy, or acquiring new skills, or simply changing your lifestyle for the better. So far, everything mentioned here was a form of self-improvement, and all that remains is that you work on your competence. You can try and do better at work, or you can start to learn other skills that can help you with house maintenance. You don’t need to spend money on this, since you can find online tutorials and start learning this way. As you improve, you will start to fix things on your own; you will start to feel that you have greater control of your life, and you will be proud of yourself. You can train yourself to become a good craftsman, which is fulfilling, and it can help you earn some extra cash on the side.

Learn to rely less on other people.

Lastly, the less you rely on others to solve your problems, the more powerful you will feel. It’s all right to ask for help, and you don’t have to do everything on your own, but if you aren’t able to solve problems without relying on others, then you will be frustrated.

This is why self-improvement is important, because when you are self-sufficient, you feel more liberated and less pressured. Furthermore, with more skills at your disposal, you can even help others, and people will start to appreciate you more. Besides, when you are helpful, you will feel better.

So, know that you are capable of many things, know that you do not need to rely on others, but also, do not refuse or shy away from asking for help. The whole point of this is to make your life easier and to gain more control over it — not to embrace unnecessary struggles.

By: Esther Ijewere

Email : Esther@womenofrubies.com

Instagram & Twitter : @estherijewere

Facebook : Esther Ijewere

***Esther is a social activist, Entrepreneur, Author and prolific writer. She is the Editor-In-Chief of the Award winning Blogazine “Women of Rubies”.

In Rubygirls October 19, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

“I DON’T ALLOW ANYTHING LIMIT ME FROM GOING FOR WHATEVER I WANT”- ADURAGBEMI AKINTEPEDE

Aduragbemi Akintepede is a nineteen year old undergraduate of Law at Olabisi Onabanjo University. She started writing at the early age of nine and published her first book, a play at the age of fourteen. She has also authored “New Cheese,” a memoir and “Late Last Year,” a short story.

Aduragbemi has a passion for writing, campaigning for women and child rights, acting, teaching and humanitarianism.

One Good Turn” which is her first published book is currently on Ogun State Ministry of Education Science and Technology’s Approved List of Textbooks for use in Junior Secondary Class Two, Literature-in-English text for 2019/2020 academic session in schools across the state.

She shares her inspiring story with me in this interview.

Childhood Influence

My parents are educationists, my dad used to be a civil servant at the Ministry of Education, Science and Technology while my mom is a teacher. So, as a little child, I had access to books early. While growing up in primary school, my dad used to have lots of books hanging around the house and some on shelves. I read “Eze Goes to school, Mayor of Casterbridge, Merchant of Venice, Things Fall Apart and books by Wole Soyinka which I didn’t understand but always kept reading. They informed my early writing and I started writing my version of stories as they came to me, in drama, firstly on the plain back of A4 papers not in use anymore at home, then, later I progressed to notebooks when I was admitted into secondary school.

My love for the female gender also grew from my home too. I have two siblings and they are both girls. So, we’re three girls. Our experiences while growing up as children made me love and appreciate femininity. That made me drift more towards the female gender, identifying with their struggles, empathizing with experiences of adult females around me, having a great feeling of joy when females around me are excelling and achieving feats.

My writing journey

I discovered that I love imagining stories and writing them out. Like I said, I started with drama, writing out dialogues. It was fun. Allowing my imagination run wild, writing things I felt should come after another. I had a friend in Junior Secondary Class One then who I write with on notebooks. I wrote my first play in Primary Four. I wrote the second with her. I had graduated to writing stories on notebooks. I would sit with her during break or after exams and start writing. It was our way of playing. Suggesting a plot of action, creating our characters to suit it. Making the dialogue flow. Everything was fun to us.

My friend left my school after our Junior Secondary education. In Senior Secondary Class Two, with the help of my parents, I was able to publish my first book, “One Good Turn Deserves Another.” A publisher advised them to let me publish my stories, so, my play was worked on and I became an author at fourteen.

Started at age 9 and publishing my first book at 14

Looking back, I must say that the journey so far has been God’s special grace. I am not the most creative or talented among my peers, I am still a budding writer but so far God has helped me to transition from then till now. When I started out, writing was a childhood hobby and I had the desire to make great impact, do great exploits even at my young age and that childhood dream is still driving me and I hope younger ones and adults alike can read from me and know that age can never be a determinant or barrier to success.

Being a Government endorsed Author at 19

I must say that being a government endorsed author at such a young age is an incredible honour for me and I’m still in awe of it. I should be the youngest author on the entire list of recommend texts for secondary schools in the state and I feel so honoured. It is also a great encouragement to me and to fellow young people that your age notwithstanding, you can be anything you set your mind to become.

My passion for women, child rights, humanitarian work and it’s Impact

I am passionate about women and children. For women, I recognize and can relate to their strengths, struggles, challenges and flaws.

We have single mothers in our society, we also have women who are married yet single in the actual sense because they bear the entire responsibilities of the home or are denied of marital bliss, love and affection. Naturally, I have a sense of empathy for them and it breaks my heart when I hear sad stories about women being abused, sidelined, going through one pain or the other.

I have always been passionate about the reading culture, mostly for teenagers because I feel it is declining in my generation and it is important to start with the little ones.

I did a revision to my first book early this year shortly before it was adopted by the Ogun state government for Junior Secondary Class Two. I ensured I included lots of vocabularies in it, some of which I learnt myself during the course of writing. It also has questions for each Act in the play. All of these were put in place so that as much as students are reading the didactic part of it with morals being instructed into them, they are also adding to their wealth of knowledge and usage of new words and can also attempt questions on what they have read.

My Goals

I intend to have a book drive in primary and secondary schools firstly in Ogun state where it is a recommended literature text, then, extend it to other states. I also intend to partner with brands mentioned in the play such as Bigi Drinks, Mentos Sweet and Nestlé as well as foundations owned by youths to have book reading sessions, talks, acting out of scenes from the book and also donating books to schools in indigent areas where students cannot afford to buy notebooks not to talk of literature texts.

Other Projects and Activities

I am also a member of organizations which give me platforms to reach out to these category of people I’m passionate about. I belong to Junior Chamber International Nigeria (JCIN), Jesunpadabo Charity Initiative which is a Christian missionary intitiative where people are fed with both the word of God and material needs too, Our Little Gist Foundation where we reach out to the girl child. By God’s grace, I am an executive member of these organizations and my activities in them always bring me a step closer to my dreams.

Balancing it all

I am a Law student in my third year, I don’t really have to give a detailed report to my parents on my academics because they trust me well enough to balance it all. However, I am accountable to my elder sister who is a medical student and also to an older friend of mine. They monitor my grades and academic progress. So, because I know I’ll have to give them a detailed report at the end of every semester, I ensure I perform well.

I also have people who do not cease to remind me to balance everything together. I have seniors in my Law faculty who commend me for doing well in other areas and also urge me to excel in my academics, so, I can be given a platform on my valedictory day to talk about school and my writing as well.

Personally, while following my passion, I always remind myself that I must excel in other areas too. So, I always try to create a balance, write or carry out other activities during semester breaks or periods I don’t have school work to do. I attend tutorials too almost every weekend and so far I have been excelling greatly in my academics.

Challenges

I am a young writer and as much as I really love writing. Most times, I lose interest in finishing up a story I’m working on. I keep procrastinating or waiting for inspiration. So, far, the knowledge that I am to take the first step- start writing, even if I feel inspired at the moment or not has been of great help. It is more like a farmer who keeps waiting for the sun to come out before setting out, he will definitely fail.

I also have a particular person, my older friend whom I mentioned earlier, Lanre Omodele who really keeps me in track. He gives me deadlines to finish up a story I have lost interest in or been procrastinating.

On Giving up

No, there hasn’t. I am passionate about everything I do and that drives me. There are times I feel discouraged or have low moments but there has never been a time I felt like giving everything up. When I’m down, I turn to God for strength, allow myself to drop my fears and worries at His feet and walk into His rest. My parents have also been very supportive. They help out in almost all areas and are fully involved in every process; writing, editing, publishing and marketing. The immense support and sacrifices of my family, adults who believe in me and youths alike keeps me going.

Being a Woman of Rubies

I feel so honoured to be a Ruby Woman and I feel that what makes me a Woman of Rubies is that I don’t allow anything limit me from going for whatever I want and also the courage to always do things afraid. I also feel that my desire to impact and impart younger generations, to be an epitome of the saying, “it is never too late or too early to start something new or achieve great feats,” makes me a Woman of Rubies.

Dear Young Woman….

For young women who are hesitant to take a leap of faith even while being afraid, I will advice them with two of my personal quotes from my second book, a memoir, “New Cheese” which goes thus:

“Work on self discovery and dare to be a new, better and positive version of you than you were yesterday.”

“Embrace you, assess you, celebrate you and above all, love you everyday to know you deserve the newest cheese out there!”

In Career Gems December 11, 2018 By Editor

MEDIA PERSONALITY, ADENIKE OYETUNDE SETS TO RELEASE HER FIRST BOOK

Media personality and founder of Amputees United, Adenike Oyetunde is set to release a new book named after her.

She’s sharing her inspiring story in the new book. Adenike was 20 when she got the news that would change her life. She was in her sophomore year in the university and was at home one weekend when she slipped and landed on her right knee while doing chores. This caused a pain that defied painkillers. She was eventually taken to the hospital and was told she had a blood clot due to the fall and the limb had to be drained out.

After this, she went back to school but her condition kept deteriorating. Another x-ray revealed that the clot was still there. This was when she was referred to the National Orthopedic Hospital, Igbobi. She was later diagnosed with Osteogenic Sarcoma (a malignant bone tumor) and was told her right leg had to be amputated to save her life.

Congratulations, Adenike!

In Career Gems November 1, 2018 By Editor

CHIMAMANDA ADICHIE HONORED WITH HUMANITARIAN AWARD AT THE 2018 ACTION AGAINST HUNGER GALA

Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie attended the 2018 Action Against Hunger Gala at 583 Park Avenue on October 30, 2018, in New York City.

At the event, she was honored with the Humanitarian Award, presented by CEO of the organization, Andrea Tamburini.

Every year, hundreds of Action Against Hunger’s most dedicated supporters come together for an evening of inspiration and hope and 2018 was no different.

The special night is an opportunity to reflect upon Action Against Hunger’s mission to save the lives of children worldwide and to present their most prestigious award, The Action Against Hunger Humanitarian Award, to individuals and corporations that have significant contributions to the humanitarian field.

See photos from the event below.

NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 30: Chimamanda Adichie attends the 2018 Action Against Hunger Gala at 583 Park Avenue on October 30, 2018 in New York City. (Photo by Jared Siskin/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images)

NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 30: Chimamanda Adichie speaks at the 2018 Action Against Hunger Gala at 583 Park Avenue on October 30, 2018 in New York City. (Photo by Jared Siskin/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images)

NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 30: Chimamanda Adichie and Andrea Tamburini attend the 2018 Action Against Hunger Gala at 583 Park Avenue on October 30, 2018 in New York City. (Photo by Jared Siskin/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images)

Photo Credit: Jared Siskin/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

Credit: Bella Naija

In Interviews&profile October 24, 2018 By Editor

#INTERVIEW: “TO EVERY GIRL CHILD, YOU ARE COMPLETE” -CHINYERE DISTINGUISHED ANOKE, AUTHOR

ChinyereDistinguished Lydia Anoke is a certified NLP Practitioner and the author of the fast-selling book, “SINGLE, FRUITFUL, FULFILLED”, a book that addresses most of the challenges/questions in the heart of Singles, and empowers them to live whole and productive lives.

She is the Steward of the SFF COMMUNITY – a Community with the mandate to raise a generation of whole and productive youths who live fruitful and fulfilled lives in all spheres of life.

She is also the Founder of Kompendia Concepts, a one-stop company for copy-writing, ghost writing, editing and publishing of books and articles.

ChinyereDistinguished is an intentional young lady with a burning desire to live out all that God has deposited in her for the benefit of mankind and ultimately for His Glory. Through her numerous write-ups on different platforms – blogs, social media and books, she is able to fulfil her passion of helping young adults to overcome self-limiting doubts, take full responsibility for their decisions, and hence, live a life of Excellence without limits.

She is a sought-after Speaker especially on topics relating to Singlehood, Self and purpose discovery, personal development, writing.

Read her exclusive interview with Women Of Rubies below:

CHILDHOOD

My dad always gave us books and compelled us to read them. Most of the things I learned and do today are things I read from books or magazines or other forms of written materials.

These books exposed me to different cultures, lifestyles and mindsets beyond that of my immediate environment.

Also, being a Pastor’s child put me and all my siblings in the spotlight from the word go. It wasn’t something I was comfortable with while growing up, but it prepared me to know that there are always eyes watching my every move. That made me very conscious and helped me deliberately cultivate integrity as a lifestyle; so my life in secret is congruent with my life in the public.

I didn’t understand how important that was until more recently when I started sharing my story on social media and even in my books. Now I have people who I didn’t know were watching, leave comments that collaborate my story.

MEET ME

My name is Chinyere Distinguished Lydia Anoke and I come from a family of 9; 2 parents and 6 siblings. My parents are clergy – my dad is a Bishop and my mum is a Pastor. From the above description, you can tell that I was raised in a Christian home and that forms the core of my beliefs and values.

Professionally, I am a Content developer and an Editor even though I studied Computer Science in the University of Nigeria Nsukka. In fact, I spent 5 long years studying the 4 year course, and eventually graduated with a 2’1.

However, I left the ICT field when it fully dawned on me that I was struggling to comprehend basic programming concepts. At this time, I was working as a Software Test Analyst with Wema Bank. My job role was to detect potential bugs in systems starting from the document stage, but I ended up detecting more grammatical errors in the Business documents that I was given. I advised myself and left before my ‘poor ICT sense’ caused some havoc. Fortunately at that same time, I got a Content Development job offer from Mavis Computel Limited, so I gladly resigned.

Afterwards, I took some online courses aligned with my interest and natural flair for writing and editing. Today, I run my own Content development and editing firm – Kompendia Concepts, where we help writers and authors refine their writings to be precise, concise and professional, to enable them communicate better and connect easier with their audience.

Socially, I am passionate about helping young adults overcome self-limiting doubts, take full responsibility for their decisions and actions and ultimately, live a life of excellence without limits. Gradually, I am achieving this one step at a time through my numerous write-ups on blogs, books and the social media.

ABOUT MY BOOK “SINGLE, FRUITFUL, FULFILLED”

My book, “SINGLE, FRUITFUL, FULFILLED”, popularly known as the SFF Book, is a detailed guide on how to make the most of Singlehood. We live in a society that is so marriage-oriented that a lot of times, children, especially female children, are made to believe that their sole purpose in life is to marry and give birth; or at least, have a man in their lives, even if she is the side-chick or 4th wife.

The SFF book is divided into four major parts.

I: Who is a Single? – This explains what is means to be Single; not just an unmarried adult.

II: Why do you want to get married? – Marriage of course is a good thing and a God-ordained institution. However, this section of the SFF book compels the reader to pause and question why he/she wants to get married… the motive, the mindset and the preparedness for marriage.

III: What to do before “I Do” – This section enlightens and empowers the reader with the four critical things to do before marriage.

IV: Dealing with SFF Challenges (loneliness, anxiety, pressure, etc.) – Just like every other phase in life, Singlehood has its unique challenges, so this section of the book addresses some of these challenges. Beyond addressing them, it also equips the reader with the right tools with which to handle and overcome their own peculiar SFF challenge(s) which may not be written in the book.

The SFF book is an easy and essential-read for all Singles. It is also highly recommended for anyone who desires to live a fruitful and fulfilled life, and as well support others to do same, regardless of their marital status.
You can find some testimonials about the SFF book on http://bit.ly/SFFfreeDownload You can also download the first two chapters for FREE with that link.

INSPIRATION BEHIND SFF

Even though I had always fantasized and desired to write a book, I never imagined that I’d write a book for Singles. But as they say, God takes your mess and turns it into a message; that it exactly what happened with the SFF book and the entire SFF Vision.

I was engaged to be married in 2015. Traditional and white weddings were scheduled for 5th and 12th December, respectively; unfortunately that never came to be. At this time I was already desperate for marriage because we were (un)consciously groomed by both our immediate families and the society at large, to believe that the deadline for ladies to get married is age 25. So I was determined to marry at that age, even though there were so many red flags in my relationship.

I had turned 25 in October 2015, so when my wedding couldn’t hold in December, my anxiety skyrocketed. I had already told most of my close friends about my wedding plans, plus we had already booked some vendors. Imagine my embarrassment each time my friends called to ask “how far?” I felt worse when 2016 came and some of my friends who weren’t even in relationships when I was planning my wedding, started getting married.

Fast-forward to October 2016 when I was going to turn 26 and my plans were still falling more apart rather than coming together, I cried desperately to God: “Father, it seems you have forsaken me. Another Christmas is approaching and I’m still single!” And He replied, “Chinyere, I see you.” Then He started showing me so many things that were wrong with both my relationship and my mindset about marriage. I had stopped desiring marriage; I was desperate for it to obtain the idol status of MRS.

Long story short, that relationship had to end the following month. Then God gave me the SFF Vision – to enlighten, encourage and empower Singles with the right mindset about singlehood and marriage. It started with an SFF interview Series on my blog. The second part is the SFF book. Now we have an SFF Community where we groom Singles. We also have the MFS (Married, Fruitful and Satisfied) part of the SFF Vision which is focused on married folks; this part is still in the pipeline for now.

THE SFF COMMUNITY

The SFF Community is an online platform where we are raising a generation of whole and productive Singles. Singles who are committed to:

– Make the most of Singlehood.
– Take full responsibility for their lives – where they are today and how they want the rest of their lives to play out.
– Be people of influence wherever they find themselves.
– Change the negative narrative about Singlehood.
– Re-write the negative marriage stories we have today with their power and exemplary marriages when they get married.

It is basically designed to help and support Singles to live fruitful and fulfilled lives before and after “I Do”. Every month we work with a theme, and then discuss sub-topics aligned with that theme throughout the month. We also bring in expert facilitators for each topic of discourse, if we don’t have any capable facilitator within the community.

For instance, our theme for April was “Understanding singlehood”. In May and June, our theme was, “The Single and his Emotions.” And in this month of October, we are discussing “The Single and his finances.” We also read a book or see a movie aligned with the theme for each month.

The SFF Community is currently run on whatsapp and we take in new members at the beginning of each month.

SINGLE LADIES OUT THERE CAN BE SINGLE, FRUITFUL, AND FULFILLED, WHILE WAITING FOR ‘MR RIGHT’….

First, SFF is not a female thing, it’s for both males and females. This is why when we launched the first part of the SFF Vision – the interview series; we got 5 males and 5 females to share their thoughts on the topic: Is it possible to be single, fruitful and fulfilled? This is also why the SFF community is for both males and females, because at the end of the day an SFF lady needs to marry an SFF man for both of them to successfully graduate into the MFS life – the Married, Fruitful and Satisfied life.

So while waiting for marriage, both the lady and the gent need to practice Part 3 of the SFF book – what to do before “I do”:

– Explicitly define what being Single means to them. Until you define a thing rightly, you cannot treat it right, even if that thing is yourself. This is the first step to being single, fruitful and fulfilled.

– Take responsibility for their individual lives. You cannot effectively take responsibility for others – a future spouse or kids, if you are not responsibly taking care of yourself as a single.

– Manage their relationships. You cannot effectively manage a lifelong relationship with a future spouse and in-laws, if you are not currently managing your (in)formal relationships well.

– Find fulfillment. This is the most interesting part. A lot of people suspend fulfillment, waiting for marriage to happen first. Then marriage happens, and it’s still not there so they wait for the kids to arrive, and so on. Truth is marriage does not give fulfillment neither is fulfillment tied to any one or any achievement. It’s something you find and cultivate NOW.

All these are explained with practical steps on how to achieve them in the SFF book.

CHALLENGES FACED

Initially when I started the SFF Series and the SFF book, some people accused me of preaching against marriage and all. So the initial challenge was resistance to the message. But with consistent sharing and more details, a lot more people now understand what it is about and are buying into the vision.

The second challenge which I am still facing is getting the SFF book into more hands. Some people complain about the cost is high, which I believe is affordable. The SFF hardcopy is N2,000, while the SFF e-book is available in 2 options: buy from okadabooks at N1,000 or have the PDF sent to your email at N1,500.

So I’m praying to have sponsors who will buy in bulk and distribute; and also for opportunity to speak on bigger platforms from which I can reach more Singles and share the SFF good news with them. So far, I’ve mostly spoken to the youth arm of different churches and some online youth platforms where I am invited to speak.

PROJECTS AND ACTIVITIES

Most of my other projects are still in the pipeline. First, I’m planning an SFF hangout for Singles within Lagos where we can have a relaxed fun meeting to gist and learn. Proposed date is last week of November, though I haven’t made a public announcement yet.

I’m also working on my new book – Turning 28: My journey to true Singlehood, which will be launched in December.

I’m also working on an online course for Singles – Single, Fruitful, Sought-after (SFS); and an online course for writers and authors – The Profitable Author. I have noticed that a lot of writers publish their books/articles and then keep mute about them. Every article is an asset that can generate social and financial capital for the writer, so I’m putting together how to exploit this revenue option in an online course for writers.

GREATEST REWARD

The testimonials! My God! Nothing brings me more joy than when someone sends a message or puts a call across to express how my book or posts have helped them make a positive decision, take a bold step or just see things in an entirely new light.

One typical example is a Facebook friend, Blessing Best. We connected last year via Facebook when I was doing my book pre-launch campaign; she was one of the first people to pre-order. Once in a while, she’d ask me for some advice or the other. Then late last year, she sent me a message that the SFF Book gave her clarity on her own calling and today she runs a community for Singles with focus on Love and Relationships. Each time I see her progress and success, it makes me smile.

Some others have started their businesses, some have published their own books, which they’d been afraid to publish, some have left relationships which were not helping their destinies and so many other testimonies.

MY BRAND IN 5 YEARS TIME…

In 5 years time, I see the SFF Vision as a Global mindset. I see a scenario where people will organize SFF groups and clubs using the SFF book as guide. I see my Team and I being invited to different nations across the globe to speak on how to live a whole and productive life before and after marriage.

I see organizations and individuals sponsoring their staff and loved ones to take the SFS course and other SFF materials.

As an Editor and writer, I see Kompendia Concepts as a sought-after brand for the elite, to handle all their content, editing and publishing works.

ON GIVING UP…

Yes, especially in running the SFF Community. I’ve never wanted to be at the forefront of any movement. So sometimes when people are not active in the group, leave the group or it appears that all my efforts are not bearing any fruits, I feel really discouraged.

Mercifully, God always inspires one or more persons at that instant to send a heart-warming message or call to express how the SFF Community has been a blessing to them even though they’ve been ghost members.

These days, such hardly gets to me. I have learned that God is the Founder of the SFF Community and I am just the Steward, so I daily pray over what He has given to me and trust Him to bring the results and increase.

MY INSPIRATION…

My parents; when I look at how much they have invested in me, I am fired up to be better and help them to enjoy their old age.

Jesus Christ; when I reflect on how He loves me shamelessly and desperately looks out for me to help me be all He wants me to be, I’m fired up to make Him proud of me.

My younger siblings – Mmeso, Victor and Chisom; I’m challenged to be the best I can be in order to help them reach their individual Zeniths faster, so they don’t waste as much time as I did, trying to figure out a lot of things.

I AM A WOMAN OF RUBIES

A Woman of Rubies is a treasure and an asset, I believe. She is one who lights up her environment with love and her commitment to help others become better. I am all these and more, so I am a Woman of Rubies.

WORDS OF ADVICE TO EVERY GIRL CHILD

The theme for this year’s International day of the Girl is – With her: A skilled girlforce. And what I’ll like to share with every girlchild is this:

You are complete.

God has given you all the spiritual, physical, mental, emotional, psychological and social capacity that you need to excel in life.

Develop your skills, deploy your potentials, read, read, read, believe in God and believe in yourself, cultivate a personal relationship with God early, surround yourself with positive-minded people and finally, take small steps of faith towards achieving the dreams in your heart; clarity comes from doing, not from over-analyzing.

You can get my book, “Single, Fruitful, Fulfilled” from the following platforms:
1. Okadabooks – bit.ly/SFFonOkadabooks
2. RovingHeights – http://bit.ly/SFFonRH
3. Konga – http://bit.ly/SFFonKonga

Blog: www.distinguishedlives.wordpress.com
Instagram: @chinyeredistinguished | @kompendiaconcepts
Facebook: ChinyereDistinguished Anoke | Kompendia Concepts
Twitter: @CDistinguished
Email: chinyeredistinguished@gmail.com | kompendiaconcepts@gmail.com