womenofrubies Archives

In fashion&style July 22, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

#OWAMBESATURDAY: LIT IRO AND BUBA GAME!

Happy weekend, WORriors! On today’s edition of #OwambeSaturday, we will be looking at different styles of rocking dear old Iro and Buba.

The Iro and Buba trend has been in existence for decades..our Mamas proudly rocked it, same way we are rocking it now. The good news is that, fashionistas have figured out new, classy ways to rock Iro and Buba and we are falling in love with ‘Iro ati Buba’ all over again!

Check out pictures of different styles you can achieve with Iro and Buba!

Images credit: google.com

In Interviews&profile July 22, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

#INTERVIEW: ”HEARING THE SOUNDS OF THE BOMB BLAST HAS BECOME A MOTIVATION TO TELL THE POSITIVE SIDE AND PERSONAL STORIES OF SURVIVORS” -NELLY ATING, PHOTO JOURNALIST

While the world focused on the negative effect of Boko Haram in the northeast. She was compelled to show and tell the virtues of resilience and the collectivist African culture displayed by the refugees. Nelly lived through the surge of Boko Haram; slept in a house once occupied by the terrorists.

Nelly Ating lives with the story, as a Photojournalist working in these high-risk zones, She h has heard the sounds of the bomb blast; it has become a motivation to tell the positive side and personal stories of survivors. More of putting faces to the personal stories, a show of dignity in humanity, this is why her story is unique. In her words “ I am fearless, something must kill a man”. Nelly shares her inspiring story as a Female Photojournalist documenting liberated Boko Haram Communities

Meet Me

My name is Nelly Ating, I am from Akwa Ibom State, but I like to identify myself first as a Nigerian before any ethnic group or tribe. I am a 28-year-old female Photojournalist based in Yola, Adamawa State. A graduate of Journalism from the American University of Nigeria, Yola.

How the journey started…

I left my job in 2014 as a Video Coordinator in a small Multimedia company based in Port Harcourt to return to Yola. This was at the peak of the insurgency. The drive was stirred from a curiosity of the actual situation on the ground. I came back thinking that from the plane I would be dodging mines, but that wasn’t the case. Life was buzzing only with a strong visible security presence. Mainstream media had painted the image that the northeast was red zone. Quite well, the insurgency, but we had beautiful stories there were underreported. Stories such as a ‘Peace model ‘ used in addressing violent extremism that no one was thinking about. A university using research drawn from community development projects to approach resolution in a volatile zone. This was not in the news, I began documenting all the University activities.

Most of my images that are viral now were taken in 2014 as they were no actual people who were reluctant to visit. The peace model had given us stories such of how people were thriving on soccer to bring unity between two religious groups. Churches that opened up their cathedral to feed refugees. Muslim prayers were said in church cathedrals and same with Christian prayers. Instantly, I knew history was set and these stories would be needed.

Full nature of my job

My job as a photojournalist is a risky one as right now I am considering visiting Sambisa and this is a plea to Nigerian Army to allow us to tell the stories of the war from both the people and the military perspective. But however, something must kill a man so I am not afraid.

Challenge

My worst challenge was having a congestive cardiac failure last year from pursuing this route in life. And coming face to face with a live IED in Michika local government area or listening to bombs go off few miles from Madagali while people went on with their normal activities.

Fearless Nelly!

I have heard the sounds of the bomb blast; it has become a motivation to tell the positive side and personal stories of survivors. More of putting faces to the personal stories, a show of dignity in humanity. Just like three days before September 11, 2015, Malkhoi IDP bomb blast in Yola, I had accompanied some university students who went to mark World Literacy Day with the refugee children. Last year, I was diagnosed with Tuberculosis and Congestive Cardiac Failure (CCF) which was traced to my constant visit to various concentration camps. None of the above deters me, I woke up from being bedridden for nine months to host a photo exhibition in honor of those lost their lives, the INGO who have worked tirelessly to relief the suffering of the refugees.

The world has a lot to learn from the tales of Boko Haram insurgency which started like a joke until millions of Nigerians in the Northeast became internally displaced suffering from hunger, trauma, and deprivation.

This war will fade, but in managing conflict/peace resolution, history must be revisited, our children must learn, unlearn, and relearn from the mistakes of our government. The path of war lives trails that last forever, especially in the minds of children who are the most affected as their education and future are cut short. Exactly why we shouldn’t take the growing Biafran agitation for granted, the effect of war is pain and trauma.

Social Media as a tool

I have been able to use social media to keep pushing this work out there, of which has proven a success. Last year, I hosted an exhibition themed “The Refugee’s Prayer” in honour of the victims who died. Monies generated were use to support eight Boko Haram orphans residing in Yola, Adamawa State through completing their Junior Secondary Education (Grade 7-9). The campaigns were mostly on social media and the reviews were positive. Recently, another generous Nigerian has decided to support more children in Michika local government area, Adamawa State.

Greatest reward

I have eight children who are victims of this war in school. One is very dear to me, his name is Mahmoud. He was captured by the insurgents for few days and has lost contact with his family. He was a truck-pusher in the market hustling for N150 daily to survive. With help of friends from Facebook we bought Mahmoud, school supplies and paid in full school fees from Jss1-3. And, recently I had a couple from Lagos sent money to a Pastor who is harboring orphans and supporting Boko Haram widow in Michika. I also link NGO’s with direct help through my images and stories.

I once slept in a house full of terrorists…

I went to Michika for an assignment and spent a night in this house that was occupied by Boko Haram when they had seized that town in 2014. I listened to the widow who owned the house tell me the things she discovered in her house when she returned right after the military liberated that community. She said they had changed her toilet from the water system to pit toilet. Stole her China wares and generator.

The house was so dirty, the left behind sanitary towels. It was eye opening to discover that they terrorists move with their own families in groups when they seize towns. But honestly sleeping with such information in that house, I felt hunted.

Life in bomb blast IDP camps

The government in conjunction with the international NGO’s are doing a lot to support the IDPs, though there is more to be done, the situation is much better compared to 2014 when some IDPs would prefer to live in the host community than living in the camps. Although, some IDPs have started going back home, especially those from communities that have been liberated.

Greatest fear?

Nothing, I would have said failure. I have failed so many times that I see it as a step to success.

Inspiration

I am inspired by these IDPs who are living despite what they have gone through. To understand the true meaning of happiness, one should listen to these people’s stories and watch them live life. It is called resilience. Then, of course, knowing that you were called to serve humanity.

My Philosophy

My philosophy is not just capturing these faces, but as a creative artist, development impact to the community through photography is my motivation. With my camera, I am creating impact one picture at a time.

Final words to the government and well-meaning Nigerians

We have more people in need of help, you can help a widow by adopting a child. It is a lot easier to be a widow in the south than in the North which has a religious and cultural undertone stigma. They have to work twice as hard to support their families. Most of them have assumed heads of household responsibility; a reality they were not prepared for. We also have young girls who were forcefully married to Boko Haram soldiers. They need rehabilitation, they complain of being stigmatized. Then instead of NGO’s supporting just farming, can we train young people who are interested in Suya making on how to make package Kilishi etc. Let’s find ancient trades that the northerners have been practicing and teach them how to grow that business. Did you know that Mubi has an International Cattle Market? We need to think of leveraging the opportunities here to create employment for youths instead of giving them just food. Lets, go to financial literacy training and break it down to the street food seller etc.

I Am a Woman of Rubies

Oh, being a woman who is fearless! The humility to accept challenges and learn daily.

Final word for women all over the world

Go to the world and do exploit! We are in no competition with men. Our world is gearing towards artificial intelligence, especially as African women, we need to set the pace for the next generation women to grow! The best resources Nigeria has, is not in its mineral resources, but the PEOPLE. I am challenging a generation of women to fill in most of those spots.

In self development July 21, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

SIJU YUSUF: WORKPLACE SEXUAL HARASSMENT

One sexual harassment (I have experienced quite a number) I will never forget was when the cussed man groped me in his office, right in the presence of another staff.

I didn’t see it coming. My tongue must have been very twisted or was it my brain? I remember being numb and dumbfounded. It took few expensive seconds to come to terms with what had just happened or what was happening. And in those long seconds, if the blaze in my eyes could start a fire, the fire department would not have been able to control the damage down the street.

Till this day, I don’t know if I would have felt better was there no third party. If I would have grieved my injured self worth with saner thoughts. A huge part of me would have preferred I was humiliated ‘privately’ but overtime, I have seen a million and one reasons to be thankful for the other presence in the room/office.

If he could grope in such close perimeters with another soul, he definitely had no cares at all and it could have been worse.

It happened so fast, it left me drained, tactless and stupefied.

To crown it all, I could not report it. The case was and never will be reported because of peculiar reasons top of which was – I would have been kicked out of the job. (The Nigerian Bosses- Subordinates Factor).

I relive that experience till this day. And as I grow older, feeling the need to sensitize people on a number of things.

No one should ever go through such demeaning, discriminating and objectifying acts.

Work place sexual harassment shouldn’t be taken lightly.

I was harassed in more than one way.

He sent suggestive emails, told lewd jokes, touched inappropriately, made sexual comments about my appearance (he couldn’t even stop staring at my rear), he made way too many inappropriate sexual gestures!

Some people didn’t get of his hook as ‘easily’ as I did but their stories are theirs to share, not mine.

I am extremely grateful to the support group I had outside of work then. If (God forbid) I find myself in a similar situation now, I know better to handle it differently or to do extras.

To share some of the things I did/would have done-

1. I spoke to him about it. This may not have fetched me much, but should the case have become legal, it will be on record that I knew what he was up to and called his attention to it. Denial will not be easy for him.

Or I could simply be telling him about it in the hope that he changes.

2. I documented a lot. I saved and printed the unsolicited rude messages I received. Again, for legal purposes.

3. Report. This I never did but will definitely do if the situation presents itself again. Who knows the number of people I will be saving by doing so. I have learnt that the worst that can happen is to lose the job. Jobs are being lost daily anyway.

The documented evidences over time will come in handy here.

4. Leave. In my case, I couldn’t take it to the HR because of his level and whatever loyalists he had in HR. The story could have been flipped on me and I couldn’t bare to not have a job. (Now I know I will always get another or better still, start something on my own). So I kept quiet till miraculously, he was taken away/got carried away by some other conquest.

It is important that steps 1 and 2 are simultaneously. Steps 3 and 4 would come on the heels of the other if 1 and 2 have failed.

Should you want to take it further, enlist legal practitioners or seek assistance from relevant NGO.

Stand for what you believe in!

credit: Siju Yusuf

In self development September 2, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

OLORI WURAOLA IS ON A MISSION TO CHANGE THE SOCIETY’S ATTITUDE TOWARDS VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN

The queen of Ife, Olori Wuraola Zaynab Otiti Ogunwusi says that she will not rest until she has contributed her quota towards changing the way the African society views violence against women. The world class monarch and highest queen in South West Nigeria had recently shocked the world by marching on the streets of Lagos to condemn and raise awareness against the scourge of gender based violence and sexual abuse victimizing women in Africa. Her campaign called #1in3Africa was to be the first time ever a globally renowned monarch was to be involved in such a grassroots activism to fight a social malady that is fast growing to point of a pandemic.

Now she has revealed that this is the beginning of the struggle and anyone who views this act as horrendous should join in the eradication of this epidemic. The March in Port-Harcourt and in Abuja dates are yet to be disclosed. She also hopes that through this process will start a proceeding towards having a bill passed that will accord more protection for Nigerian women at the hands of potential abusers. She says her organization will set up help lines for women undergoing abuse to obtain help, create communication systems to create awareness against the crime and also employ other means such as counseling and rehabs to restore women who have suffered abuse. She also plans to drive for more arrests and prosecutions of more offenders.

In explaining her motivation for getting involved in such activism, Olori Wuraola said: “Many people have expressed shock that a queen will get involved in a street march of this nature. But then, that is the whole point! I have been so shocked by what I see the society turning into that I am left with no choice than to march in the streets to raise awareness against this malady, if that is what I have to do. People can be quick to condemn flimsy things without condemning injustice I run a foundation that cares for rural women. I have seen women who are so afraid of their husbands that they are afraid of coming out to receive economic empowerment, preferring to remain in abject poverty, rather than be subjected to battery by overbearing husbands, who want them to remain in subjugation. A man you should love and respect suddenly wants you to be scared of him. Marriage is partnership and that’s how it works. I find it so hard to believe that such a deep rooted evil in our society will be existing and people are going about as if nothing is going wrong!”

She is alarmed that society treats violence against women as “family matters” while thousands of young women are dying daily as a result of injuries inflicted by battering husbands and lovers. She believes that gender based violence and sexual abuse against women is a crime and should be treated as such.

According to her: “The most troubling aspect of the whole issue is that these women suffer from a soul-deep emotional trauma and it robs them of their self-esteem, they become permanently damaged psychologically and they do not even know it. These women see themselves as undeserving of aspirations to a better life and future. And it impacts on their children who are conditioned to see themselves as inferior people, devoid of the right to ambitions!”

Olori wuraola strongly believes that emancipating women from domestic violence will free the real potentials of Africa and enable the innate human capacities that will take the continent to the next level to be unleashed. She advocates that economic empowerment of African women should begin with social emancipation of African women from Battery and abuse.

#1in 3 Africa campaign march took place on Friday 30th June 2017 at 10AM, from Falomo to Bar Beach across Akin AdesolaStreet in Lagos. It featured a large throng of women from all walks of life, with highly illuminating presence of celebrities among the crowd.

The march has had the support of a- list celebrities such as Ooni of Ife, Emir of Kano, Muhammad Sanusi II, Nollywood actors like Tonto Dikeh, Mercy Aigbe, Kate Henshaw, Ini Edo, Monalisa Chinda, Uche Jumbo, Funke Akindele, Adunni Ade, and Annie Idibia. Other celebrity partners include; Seyi Shay, Ndidi Obioha (Enthyst), HRH Queen Chika Acholonu, Onari Duke, Dare Art Alade, Ifeoma Williams, Yutee Rone, Toke Makinwa and many more.

In self development July 21, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

BURN SURVIVOR , SOLARA SHARES INSPIRING STORY OF STRENGTH, BRAVERY & SELF-LOVE

We love amazing testimonies and Solara‘s (@yeetgod) is one of them. She remains strong and confident even after a tragic fire incident when she was two years old. But that didn’t just happen, she went through a lot of challenges and down times and she has decided to share her story with the world.

After several surgeries and procedures, Solara attempted to take her life at least four times, but she ended up coming out stronger. “I hated that I’m covered in scars but I slowly started to learn to love myself,” she said, adding “I’m a survivor.”

Solara | Photo Credit: Instagram – @yeetgod

A GoFundMe campaign has been set up to assist Solara with medical expenses. You can support her HERE.

Solara after the tragic incident

Read her story below:

I was born in Lebanon (a country in the Middle East) the accident was caused from an explosion, several people were injured and some were even killed. Of those killed my baby brother was one of them. I suffered third and fourth degree burns on 70% of my body, I was two years old at the time of the accident.

Doctors predicted that I’d only live 24 hours after the explosion but I survived and was put on life support. I was in a coma for 6 months after that. When I woke up I couldn’t hear, see or walk. I had several surgeries in Lebanon but I came to the U.S for more treatment and surgeries.

I’ve had dozens, maybe even a hundred procedures and surgeries. A large portion of my life was spent at the hospital and for a period of time during my childhood I couldn’t walk.

The first time I attempted suicide I was 12 and since then I attempted suicide 4 times, I didn’t want to live. I thought the world was against me. I had suffered so much pain and I just wanted it all to end. I was put on suicide watch at the adolescent psychiatric unit all 4 times with extensive counseling, it didn’t seem helpful at first but looking back I think it was.

I had extreme insecurities, I was insecure about my facial deformities. I was insecure because i have scars on the right side of my breast. I hated that I can’t use my right hand. I hated that I’m covered in scars but I slowly started to learn to love myself. I still very much have insecurities but I’m taking it one day at a time.

Beauty is a concept I have struggled with but I have a lot more confidence now than I did as a kid. I think I’m beautiful. My scars tell a story, they represent my strength and bravery. I’m constantly thinking of my brother who passed away, I think he’s my guardian angel, he is what keeps me going as well as my family, friends, and son. I am surrounded by love and happiness. I’m a survivor.

View this post on Instagram

Aww.. go Solara @yeetgod! ❤❤ Thank you for sharing your story. You can donate to support she and her family here: https://www.gofundme.com/help-solara-with-medical-expenses Video via @shalom_blac

A post shared by BellaNaija (@bellanaijaonline) on Jul 19, 2017 at 6:06am PDT

Source: Bellanaija.com

In Career Gems July 20, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

BLAC CHYNA AND DAUGHTER, DREAM KARDASHIAN, GRACES THE COVER OF PEOPLE MAGAZINE

Reality TV Star and model, Blac Chyna, who recently went through a controversial, messy separation from her fiancee Rob Kardashian, gave an exclusive interview to People.com. as she and her daughter, Dream Kardashian, graces the cover of the magazine.

Read excerpts from her interview below:

Sitting down with PEOPLE in the living room of her six-bedroom Los Angeles home, the model and Lashed Cosmetics entrepreneur opens up about remaining dedicated to Dream, her 8-month-old daughter with Kardashian, and King Cairo, her 4-year-old son with rapper Tyga.

“I’m not going to take something that happened to me in the past into my future,” Chyna, 29, says in the current issue of the magazine. “First and foremost, I’m going to make myself happy because once I’m happy, then Dream can be happy and then King can be happy and then everybody else around me can be happy.”

Being happy hasn’t necessarily been easy for Chyna recently after Kardashian, 30, took to Instagram and Twitter on July 5 to post nude photos of her and accuse her of cheating and using drugs. But after being granted a restraining order on July 10, Chyna is ready to focus on the positive in her life — and help others who’ve experienced similar retaliation from exes.

“Words are words, but once you start posting actual pictures, then that’s just not right. It’s actually against the law,” she says. “If I was to go and do a very artsy, high-end photo shoot exposing my breasts, that’s my choice. This is my body. It’s my right. Once somebody else does it, it’s just not right. I’m hoping that somehow, some way, this will let [more people] know, ‘Don’t do it.’ ”

Chyna says women have approached her both in person and online since her July 10 court appearance to let her know that she has inspired them to take control.

“I just want to voice my story — voice what’s real — because at the end of the day, the person next to me could possibly be going through the same thing. For people to actually look up to me really means a lot. These types of things, they happen every day. A lot of women, they don’t address it. See it, recognize it — but don’t be tainted by it. Just be strong and positive.”

Chyna admits she is concerned about Kardashian’s social media rant – but only to a degree.

“When somebody that’s actually been the closest to you says these things, other people are going to believe it,” she says. “But the people that I actually care about, my family and friends, they’re all I worry about. I’m not going to sit here and hide in my house over somebody else being hurt or jealous or insecure.”

Chyna is steadfast in her belief that there is “no turning back” in regards to her romantic relationship with Kardashian.

“I’m glad I’m relieved of [Rob], but damn, why did I have to get relief in this way?” she says. Though through it all, she thinks she’s found a silver lining: “I feel like God does certain things — not to hurt you, but to show you your true strength. I feel like, if I can come out of this, I can come out of anything.”

credit:People.com

In Career Gems July 20, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

IBIDUN IGHODALO CELEBRATES DAUGHTER AS SHE TURNS A YEAR OLDER

Pastor Ituah and Ibidun Ighodalo, Keke, turned a year older yesterday, July 19th and Ibidun took to her Instagram page to celebrate their daughter and praise her husband.

See post and photos below:

”#July19 – the best day God created ….#myown #oniseiyanu????
Where do I start from ?

Happy birthday to my senior husband with a heart of gold…. touching everyone you come across positively…. it is truly a privilege to share the same birthday with you hubstar, my twin, my rock, my support system, my everything????????????❤❤❤ I pray that my Good God will show up for you when you need him now and ever more .love you my twin, my protector, my own ???????????? best dad to @omoehii and awesome husband to @ifeyinwaighodalo
Happy birthday to my own, my baby, my princess, the one who lights up my world, the one whose smiles and makes me know everything is just alright, the one who God has blessed me with, my star, my everything….. where do I start thanking God from??? My miracle worker , my promise keeper …From before time began He destined you and I to be born on the same day , name sake and He did it in such a breathtaking way.

My God is THE master planner….. You came and silenced all the naysayers #MySilencer … #OurBlood the one God miraculously brought forth for us….keke you have brought nothing but joy to my life and I couldn’t have asked God for a better daughter! You energy so out of this world. No one can keep up with you ????????????Brilliant, beautiful, witty, charming, delightful, you are everything and more that I could ever wish for my darling and I pray that God Himself will raise you to be a woman of excellence and virtue. You are my sign and my wonder and I bless God for you every waking moment. Have a day as fabulous as you my darling. Mummy loves you fiercely. ❤️???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? #Triplets#BirthdayMates #Hubby #Daughter#MyPrideAndJoy #BirthdayBehaviour#TheIghodalos
@tybello you are simply the best ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? thank you for these lovely pictures ????????????

In Career Gems July 20, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

IBIDUNNI IGHODALO & DAUGHTER GIVES US MOTHER-DAUGHTER GOALS IN NEW BIRTHDAY PICS

Beauty queen and successful event entrepreneur Elizabeth R/The Dorchester/Avant Garde Ibidunni Ighodalo and her beautiful daughter Keke are celebrating their birthday today.

Renowned photographer Ty Bello in her usual style took to her Instagram page to share photos from their shoot accompanied with a beautiful message.

‘..A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back EXOTIC SURPRISES …. (from proverbs 31 . The message translation)

I was thinking about @ibidunni_ighodalo today and my heart went to proverbs 31. .. I read through.. and I was like yeah I know her .. the babe’s name is Elizabeth R.
Ibidun is really a proverb .. a beautiful mystery .. the baby-faced – delicate- always blushing flower .. but stronger than most people I know. Soft spoken and introverted yet open and spontaneous in her kindness. I’ve been through many season with’ Dun-dun ‘ .. I’ve never seen any one dare to dream so openly …and spread hope like she has even when going a tough season …But look at you ..Ibidunni…it’s clear .. God knows how to take care of his flowers .. I’ve seen him carry you wind-blown by faith to this most beautiful place .. making all things new .

Ibidun like in proverbs 31 .. God really is always using you to bring exotic surprises .Your life is such a testimony and I’m so proud of you . Happy birthday to you and your beautiful bundle of endless energy Keke. For every time your heart whispered the word ‘twins’ .. now you know what He meant.. ????????????????????????same birthday .. same smile .. same everything !!!this God amazes me..You’re both so beautiful.. so so so beautiful!! Thank God for the 19th of July !!#tybellophotography #mother-daughter #birthdaysession

In Career Gems July 20, 2017 By Esther Ijewere

”TONTO DIKEH IS NATURALLY A KIND SOUL” -HALIMA ABUBAKAR

Ailing actress, Halima Abubakar, has come out to defend Tonto Dikeh after fans came for her for posting a photo of sick Halima. In an Instagram post, Halima narrated how Tonto came to pick her from the hospital and took care of her.

See her IG post below;

“I want to use this Lil strength in me now to thank my wonderful friend @tontolet who came into town to shoot a movie, but left her work to come pick me up when I told her I was in the hospital. she said don’t move an inch give me the address (bless her) out of love she made sure I was safe and I already shared my journey with you all.

“How many friends will make sure you take your medication, force you to eat and monitor your temperature? All she did was out of love and so you all can pray for me you all have seen me at my best and you should see me at my lowest (no shame)I basically showed you all my womb,a picture is nothing to me(I rocked the baldness) help me thank her for dropping all she had to do for me..Notting but pure love.

“Only good friends will do that.Money was never involved in her gestures.She is naturally a kind soul and I will forever be grateful @tontolet for that single post, you all have been praying for me❤️❤️❤️ that’s noble act. I love you for ever. you are a great friend #but those drugs bitter sha thank you mama king. pls thank her for doing that for me.

“I have nothing but respect for you. #womensupportingwomen#friendshipforever”