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This seem to be the ready question asked a sexual harassment or rape victim by his/her audience, regardless of whether they are of the same or opposite sex. As awkward as it may sound, this question is often from people of the same sex as the victim. Aren’t they supposed to demonstrate more empathy?

Is this in the bid to confirm known statistics (which have undeniable high tones of ‘agenda setting’)of harassment as a result of indecent dressing or in a callous/insensitive bid to justify the acts of the abuser?

Whatever the case, this question shouldn’t be our default when we encounter victims. The experiences are too horrible to then, again, be asked, if they asked for it. Will it make any difference on your sense of judgement or your humanity/morality should the victim have dressed indecently? *Indecent dressing being subjective. Our definitions of this varies vastly and are often influenced by levels of exposure*. 

I digress.

What a victim, who has damned all consequences to share his/her story begs of us is empathy, love, acceptance, reassurance and support through the dark and lonely paths of healing. 

Avoid asking questions that suggest you question the genuineness of her story and screams ‘you got what you deserved’. If you can’t be supportive, don’t bother. Maybe, ‘choke’ on your questions? (Figuratively). 

A seamless foundation application should be crease free, not settle into fine lines or be patchy or flaky and most importantly should feel and look like your skin- you shouldn’t be able to tell the difference between your complexion and your foundation- it should fit picture perfectly.

To achieve seamless foundation coverage, there are easy tips to be followed through to make sure the rest of the makeup go on perfectly as well.

  1. Allow your foundation sit and dry before going ahead with other beauty products. Making sure the foundation gets dry ensures it doesn’t melt into other products and ‘wash or melt’ them off.

  2. Never use dirty tools to apply foundation. Clean beauty tools to ensure a clean layer of product is spread on the face when applying foundation. When dirty tools are used products are re-transferred on the face and this cause breakouts, block pores etc.

  3. To ensure even foundation distribution, start applying foundation from the centre of the face and work outwards, this helps to even out the foundation around the face.

  4. Don’t apply foundation only on the face, apply product right around the jawline, work product around every visible skin around the face and blend products down towards the neck area, the ears etc for an even and seamless coverage.

  5. Never skip primer/try out the powder before foundation technique. Make sure your foundation stays in place by first priming the skin or start out with translucent powder (for light every day wear) to keep foundation in place.

 

 

 

Credit: pulse.ng, totalbeauty.com

Award winning Nigerian fashion designer, Toju Foyeh yesterday shared a message to her fans on being consistent and also believing that “What is for you is for you”.
See her post below;
 
 
2,733 likes
 
84 comments
#TBT October 2015 I was called to meet and dress the First Lady of South Africa (Her Excellency Bongi Ngema-Zuma) …oh how God has blessed me. I remember that day like it was yesterday. They must have called atleast 5 times for me to come over to meet a VIP client. Each time I was reluctant, Because for security reasons they couldn’t reveal who she was to me..I was actually afraid to leave my office to meet someone I don’t even know. After the 5th call, I decided to go…ofcourse I prayed before hand. On my way there, they called and told I’d be escorted into the premises and need to go through security checks…I’m thinking hmm…did I make a mistake by agreeing to see this person? When I arrived they told me it was the First Lady of SA…oh how I felt so silly for being long with them and asking a million questions 😂 Moral of the story is…God blesses us in ways we least expect. When I started fashion design, it wasn’t even sure about it but there a force inside me that kept me going and I know that was God telling me ‘I’m destined for GREATNESS’ Another very important lesson is – what’s for you is for you. No one and nothing can block your blessings from God. A lot of people get discouraged, influenced by what’s happening in other people’s lives. Just focus on your own goals and leave the rest to God. They didn’t have to keep calling me back, but It was destined by God that would be my blessing. Some times it’s hard, but I hold on to the words of Philippians 1v6: ‘Be confident of this very thing, he (God) who began a good work in YOU, will see you through till the day of Christ. Just want to encourage someone today, as a child of God you are not alone – even in your darkest hour, have FAITH, don’t give up, praise God, be patient, he will surely bless and surprise you beyond your expectations. #SoGrateful #BlessedAndHighlyFavoured Kai my chubby days are behind me 😂

In an op-ed for the New York Times, Lupita wrote that she met Weinstein in 2011, at an awards ceremony in Berlin, while she was still a student at the Yale School of Drama.

He had been introduced to her as the “the most powerful producer in Hollywood,” she wrote.

Wary about both strangers and the “intentions of men,” Lupita had sought others’ opinion of Weinstein, looking to vet him.

“Keep Harvey in your corner.” a female producer had said. “He is a good man to know in the business, but just be careful around him. He can be a bully.”

They had exchanged contacts, and although she continued to refer to him as Mr. Weinstein, he insisted she call him by his first name.

Not long after, he invited her to attend a screening of a film with his family at home in Westport, not far away from New Haven where she was staying at the time.

They had had lunch at a restaurant first, and although she ordered juice, Weinstein insisted she had vodka and diet soda, telling the waiter, “Get her what I tell you to get her. I’m the one paying the bill.”

When the drink arrived, along with water, she had only the water, and Weinstein had called her stubborn.

Watching the movie in his home, maybe 15 minutes in, Weinstein said he wanted to show her something.

She wanted to see the movie, she said, but Weinstein insisted, saying they would return shortly.

He led her into a bedroom, his bedroom, and said he wanted to massage her.

“I thought he was joking at first,” Lupita wrote. But he wasn’t.

Panicking, she offered to give him one instead, hoping it could put her in control of the situation.

While massaging his back, Weinstein said he wanted to take his pants off. She said no, and because he insisted, she walked away, standing by the door frame and telling him: “If we’re not going to watch the film, I really should head back to school.” He called her stubborn again.

He had his driver return her home, gifting her a boxed collection of “The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency,” an HBO show that he had produced.

The next time he invited her over, it was to a staged reading of his new Broadway show, “Finding Neverland,” which, feeling unsafe, she attended with 2 male friends.

Weinstein was on his best behavior, and she believed they had been able to get past their awkward beginnings, and could now sustain a professional relationship.

That was why she could accept and attend alone a screening of “W.E.” he invited her to. After the screening, they would have drinks.

As planned, after the screening, they sat to eat at Tribeca Grill, and hadn’t even began eating, when Weinstein said: “Let’s cut to the chase. I have a private room upstairs where we can have the rest of our meal.”

She refused, saying she’d rather eat at the restaurant.

He asked her not to be naive, that if she wanted to be an actress she had to be willing to do this sort of thing.

“You have no idea what you are passing up,” he said.

“With all due respect, I would not be able to sleep at night if I did what you are asking, so I must pass,” she said.

Afraid of her career, “I just want to know that we are good,” she told him.

“I don’t know about your career, but you’ll be fine,” he said.

 

 

credit: stargist.com

Michelle Williams, a member of former girl group Destiny’s Child, in a recent interview with CBS’ ‘The Talk’ has opened up on her battle with depression.

She said:

I’m in one of the top-selling female groups of all time, suffering with depression.

When I disclosed it to our manager (Mathew Knowles) at the time, bless his heart, he was like, “You all just signed a multi-million dollar deal. You’re about to go on tour. What do you have to be depressed about?”

So I was like, “Oh, maybe I’m just tired”

Michelle also disclosed that she had been feeling that way since she was thirteen, and not until she got to her 30 did she  realize it was depression.

She also said:

“I think at the age of 25, had I had a name to what I was feeling at the time, I would have disclosed that ‘I’ve been suffering from depression.,

After the show, Michelle tweeted,

 

Thank you @TheTalkCBS for being a safe place to talk about !! Don’t be afraid to reach out for help!

 

Gina Ehikodi Ojo, OAP, Food Blogger and CEO of Foodies And Spice, a Pidgin Culinary TV Programme for all food-lovers is celebrating the one year birthday of her twin boys which she had despite negative doctors report.

Gina had been told she had fibroid by a Sonographer but she refused to believe his report and told him she was coming back with her twins.

Long short, she went home and started preparing for twins by faith and without using any fertility drugs or any special regimen, she got pregnant and delivered her twin boys.

She took to her Instagram page @geenafoodiesandspice to share the testimony.

Read below.

To celebrate the twins first birthday, she also penned a letter to  them. See below.

 

 

 

culled from fabwoman.ng

Actress Adesuwa Etomi has taken to her Twitter page to dish out five key rules of spending, and she totally nailed it!

See her tweet below:

1. Save before you spend

2. Don’t spend money on more ‘wants’ than ‘needs’

3. Don’t spend money that hasn’t hit your account yet.

4. Don’t buy things on credit.

5. Don’t buy things to impress anyone, it’s foolish.

 

 

Niniola Apata, better known by her name Niniola, is a Nigerian singer and songwriter. She was born on 15 December 1986. She rose to recognition in 2013 after finishing third runner-up on the sixth season of Project Fame West Africa. Upon the release of her breakthrough debut single “Ibadi”, Niniola was nominated in the “Most Promising Act to Watch” category at the 2015 Nigeria Entertainment Awards. She currently has a record deal with Drumroll Records.

Niniola is a native of Ekiti State but was born in Lagos State where she had her primary and secondary school education at Apata Memorial High School. She is an alumna of the University of Lagos where she graduated with a Bachelor of Education certificate.

She competed in Season 6 of Project Fame West Africa where she placed 3rd Runner-Up. During the competition, she performed a live rendition of “Limpopo” with KCEE and also performed her composition “Itura” which was produced by Cobhams Asuquo. She cites Dolly Parto, Whitney Houston, Celine Dion, The Cranberries, Madonna, Beyonce, and Angelique Kidjo, as her music influences.

On 19 March 2014, Niniola released her debut single “Ibadi”, produced by Sarz. The song received positive critical reviews, topped national music charts and gained extensive airplay.“Ibadi” and her single “Gbowode” were used as soundtracks in the Season 2 of Nigerian television drama series Gidi Up. In 2015, she was listed on notJustOk’s  “15 Artists to Watch in 2015” and was nominated in the “Most Promising Act to Watch” category at the 2015 Nigeria Entertainment Awards.

Niniola has performed in different shows, and won several awards and recognitions. She describes her style of music as “Afro-House”, a blend of afrobeat and house music.

 

Women Of Rubies celebrates you, Niniola!

A new housing development in Ibeju-Lekki, Lagos is doing its own little part to honour women whose efforts in shaping the history of Nigeria, have been unceremoniously forgotten. Okang Ashiwel Ochui, who is currently working on the project, took to Twitter to ask for help in naming 21 of the community’s streets after unsung female heroes in Nigeria’s history.

View image on Twitter

Guys, I need to name 21 streets, and I’d like to name them after some of the undercelebrated women in Nigeria’s history. Suggestions?

It didn’t take long for people to suggest a bunch of worthy names, from authors and activists to politicians and musicians.

Okang later tweeted out a shortlist which included 31 amazing women that all deserve the recognition. So, we wait to see which names get selected for the honour.

 

 

culled from konbini.com