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self development

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Most organisations today operate in a highly complex matrix structure with multiple reporting lines and different levels of expertise requiring you sometimes to be vast across a number of skills.

This can be overwhelming sometimes especially when you have multi-functional projects and your delivery is dependent on others as you are not able to do most of the tasks on your own. Thing is, the priority level of each task is different from function to function but each action adds up as an essential for you. More importantly, you need not be overwhelmed but have the ability to ask for help , that way, you spend less time struggling.

It is important to have an enabling environment that allows you to function in a way that fosters better collaboration. Asking for help should not be seen as a sign of weakness but rather, recognizing what you are good at and appreciating what someone else’s is good at.  This enables both sides to benefit and gain valuable experience.  The person receiving helps adds nuance and texture to their thinking, overcome cognitive biases and flaws in their logic while at the same time giving someone else an opportunity to shine and validate their knowledge – this could make someone else’s day!

In asking for help, first acknowledge that you don’t have a solution to a task/problem or that you can’t do it alone – be sure to explore possible solutions as your own first step. Remember, no one person can know everything, so allow yourself to be human. It’s also better to build a reputation to be known to give assistance to others. This paves the way for reciprocity and encourages others to reach out without incurring social debts or negative repercussions, making it an admirable trait.  Additionally, ask for help smartly, as a ‘SMART’ request (Why you need it, what you need, When you need it, from who do you need help) is easy to respond to as you never know what people know or how they can help until you ask. Not only will you have the benefit of extra advice, you will also have people to share your successes with.

An enabling work environment makes it easy to ask for help by encouraging the practices and setting the tone and the norms. However, we must take time out to say ‘thank you’ and really mean it to express our gratitude for the help. It’s important to close the loop by letting the other person know how valuable your help was – people appreciate recognition and follow through. On both sides, emotional intelligence, diplomacy, self-awareness and patience are required to avoid damaging consequences to individuals and the organization.

To be successful in today’s work environment, you need to ask for what you need as it can become a powerful tool, if employed strategically – save yourself and others time by asking insightful questions that demonstrate your curiosity, inquisitiveness and your interest in understanding the process and not just performing your step of the cycle. Two heads… Or more…are better than one, strong people ask for help. Avoid muddling through a bad situation on your own, as challenges presents opportunities to cultivate our network and proactively build relationships.

Again, remember to frame the ‘ASK’ properly.

 

 

ABOUT  TOLA

Bamigbaiye-Elatuyi Omotola is a Regional Marketing Manager for West Africa in an FMCG. A firm believer in empowering others for success in the work place as she is a well sought after facilitator on Marketing and Business management. She also manages Workplace Management columns and Consumer Insight columns in magazines published across West Africa as well as volunteering with NGO’s as a child educator.

Instagram: tolaspeaks
Twitter: alottola

Currently ranked by Forbes as the richest woman in Nigeria with an estimated net worth of $2.1 billion, Folorunsho Alakija has proven to be a successful woman both career and business wise.

Alakija who is the managing director of The Rose of Sharon Group, executive vice-chairman of Famfa Oil Limited, founder of Supreme Stitches and a host of other businesses has shown that she has what it takes to  be a power woman.

She started her career as an executive secretary who rose to the top without a college degree against all odds.

Here are 5 Life lessons every lady can learn from her.

1.   Be Passionate About What You Are Doing

The first lesson you can learn is if you are currently in a position or a job that is not your dream job, do not let that stop you from learning as much as you can from that role. You never know who you may meet in that position that would help you move forward.  Alakija was once a company secretary because of her fathers wishes and she excelled as an executive secretary and eventually rose to become the first director of corporate affairs for Nigeria’s International Merchant Bank.

2.   Take Advantage Of Opportunities

If you intend to start your own business someday you should read alot about that industry, attend events, and talk to people who are doing what you are currently interested in. If you find an opportunity that is not currently being addressed, you should dive into it before the opportunity passes you by.

Alakija ventured into the Nigerian fashion industry at a time when things were beginning to grow.  According to her, “It was a time when Nigerians were very proud of display African fashion.

3. Make An Impact Regardless Of Your Position

Regardless of your position, there is something you can share with people looking up to you as a mentor.  Make an impact in your immediate community, neighborhood.

Alakija has a foundation named Rose of Sharon Foundation, a non-governmental organization that supports widows and orphan children through programs and educational grants. Even before she became a philanthropist, Alakija was involved in community programs and shared her expertise with others through speaking engagements and attending volunteer events.

4. Be Enterprising

Every lady shouldn’t always rely on her salary alone, you must have other legitimate sources of income. Learn to do a business on the side. But ensure it won’t affect your major work schedule. Alakija’s primary sources of wealth are rooted in oil and fashion. Currently, She is the Vice Chairman of Famfa Oil, managing director of The Rose of Sharon Group and the founder of Supreme Stitches, a fashion label that catered to upscale clientele.

5. What Is Worth Doing At All Is Worth Doing Well

Every lady must have the ”what is worth doing at all is worth doing well attitude”. It would help you achieve a lot in your business and career. You Must be able to juggle the competing demands of a career or business and family.  Alakija successfully manages many streams of business and also keeping her home together.

 

 

Credit: fabwoman.ng

On October 5 2017, Aisha Ahmad was nominated by the President, General Muhammadu Buhari to fill in the position left behind by a former Central Bank of Nigeria deputy Governor, Sarah Alade who retired in March 2017. Her appointment has been subjected to the Senate for confirmation.

Below are nine facts about her;

 

1.) Ahmad who hails from Niger State was born October 26, 1976.

2.) She holds an MSc in finance and management from the Cranfield School of Management in the UK, an MBA with a specialisation in finance from the University of Lagos and a graduate degree in accounting from the University of Abuja.

3.) Ahmad has worked at local and global institutions, including NAL Bank Plc, Stanbic IBTC Bank Plc (a member of Standard Bank Group),  Zenith Bank Plc and Bank of New York Mellon among others.

4.) She is currently responsible for the consumer banking division at Diamond Bank Plc comprising consumer banking group, privilege banking group, retail assets group and bancassurance.

5.) Ahmad is a member of the Chartered Financial Analyst (CFA) and Chartered Alternative Investment Analyst (CAIA) Associations – globally recognised programmes for investment analysts and portfolio managers.

6.) She is the chairperson of the executive council of Women in Management, Business and Public Service (WIMBIZ), a Nigerian non-profit organisation founded in 2001 by 13 women and one man who identified a serious issue concerning women in the workplace and in business, particularly in the areas of leadership capacity building and avenues for networking for growth.

7.) Hillary Clinton who she shares her birthday with inspires her.

“Hillary Clinton who happens to be my ‘birthday mate’ has been a strong influencer over the years. I admire her ability to stay focused on making an impact and my admiration for her has only been validated by her recent nomination as the US Democratic presidential candidate.”

8.) She is married to Abdallah A. Ahmad, a retired brigadier-general, and their union is blessed with two teenage sons.

9.) She is also a board member of the SOS Children’s hospital.

 

 

source: Nigerian Monitor, naijainfo.com

Morna International Children’s Foundation will be kick starting an Initiative tagged: “The Girl Child Matters” in commemoration of International Day of the Girl Child on the 13Th Of October, 2017 at Ikotun, Alimosho Local Government area of Lagos state.
It is going to be a Seminar for adolescent girls in various Secondary and Primary School pupils.

Guest Speakers for the Seminar are Jesuleke Akinpelumi, a female Pilot with Caverton Helicopters Susan Ikegwu, a Gender Activist, and ACP. Aderemi Adeoye,  an Assistant Commissioner of Police seconded to African Union Commission.

Key areas the Initiative will focus on are;

The right of the girl Child to Education

The right of the girl Child to protection from abuse

The right of the girl Child to equality

The right of the girl Child to Health & Care

The right of the girl Child to survival

The Girl child matters is subsequently going to include campaigns, rallies, and workshops in order to spreads its message.

Bukola Afolabi Ogunyeye

Executive Director / Founder

MORNA International Children’s Foundation (MICF)

Phone number: 08175625915

Email: info@mornafoundation.org

Website: www.mornafoundation.org

ABOUT MORNA INTERNATIONAL CHILDREN’S FOUNDATION (MICF)

MICF is a registered Non- Governmental Organization. She campaigns against Child Abuse, it’s prevention and assist Victims of Sexual Abuse and promotes the rights of the Nigerian Child. Her vision is to build a word where Children are respected and protected from all forms of abuse.

MISSION STATEMENTS

1. MICF’s mission commits to nurture and empower Children on their fundamental Human rights.

2. To provide public awareness on the current state of Child abuse and neglect in Nigeria.

3. To spread programs that focus on advocating prevention and early intervention in Child abuse and neglect through public education.

Yesterday I spent the day at my Refresh soul sisters dental office. She had her annual free Dental day where she and her team of dentists give free dental care to the less fortunate. She recruited me to give motivation, inspiration and transformation and when Tejumade St Matthew-Daniel calls you…you feel compelled to come 😉. 

They saw over 200 patients. And at the end of the day, as is her way, she asked me what the most impactful moment was for me. 

There were so many but l’ll tell you what touched me the most was how she and her husband worked together. He was front and center supporting and pouring into his wife’s mission. He is a successful physician himself (He was actually on call that day) and he brought his office team to volunteer. While she was seeing patients, he was not somewhere sitting as Oga concerned. He was walking around, working with the volunteers, speaking to the people waiting for medical attention. 

During her thank you speech, she honored him and whenever I speak to either of them, they speak so highly of each other. It was beautiful to see a model of a marriage fueled by purpose and bound by love. 

Some might think he isn’t Nigerian but he is. They are both Nigerian and they are one of the powerhouse couples I know. 

It strikes me as amazing because unfortunately, so often there is some unnecessary tension in some marriages. Some men have been socialized to believe that being a husband means controlling a woman and sometimes even suffocating her passion and drive out of her. Some are so threatened by strong women. 

If you meet Tejumade, you will say she is a strong woman. She is. No doubt about it. If you meet me, you might say the same perhaps. 

So many (Nigerian) men find strong women troubling. I myself have heard the phrase “be forming strong woman there o!) from different men. 

But then some women get it twisted too. They are also controlling and emasculating and more. Some women become warriors at war with the wrong enemy. But these control dramas are not about gender…

They are about emotional and spiritual immaturity. 

For the insecure and immature, love is often replaced by control and intimidation is used by many husbands/wives as opposed to affection and loving communication. For some men, they just want their wives to be quiet. Just acquiesce. To have no voice…as if she was not created by God to fulfill purpose…and sometimes it is the voice of your partner that will alert you to danger. 

My father and I were talking last year about culture, tradition and gender relations. And he said finally…any society that doesn’t value and make room for the contributions of it’s women is like a dog trying to walk on just two legs. 

Our people say that what an old person sees sitting down, a young person can not see standing up. 

Back to the couple of the hour. I have been blessed to spend time with them and they are both purpose driven, sold out to God and constantly investing in their own growth. This I believe is the key. They are both yearning to be the best people they can be. Individually and together and they support each other’s growth. 

We are all meant to be strong in the Lord. To be of good courage is not a mandate only for men. For God has given us all (men and women alike) a spirit of power, love and a sound mind. 

When a strong man and woman unite = 💥💥Powerhouse couple.

Yesterday, because of the efforts of a powerhouse couple and their teams, hundreds of lives were changed. 

Selah.

Curled from her Facebook page 

It may seem like your friends are entering the next phase of their lives — and many are — but a lot of relationships don’t work out and a lot of your friends who are in relationships may eventually start wondering what else is out there. After all, the grass is always greener… or so we think.

As a product of how much people change throughout this period, I’ve come to realize that it’s not such a bad thing to wait, to find out who you are first and to find love later.

So while you’re figuring this out, you might as well enjoy being single. Here are ways to do just that:

Be spontaneous.

This may be one of the only times in your life when you can do whatever you want, when you want and not be restricted by someone else’s desires.

Travel.

It’s one of the best ways to discover who you are; you’ll meet lifelong friends and make lifetime memories along the way.

Spend as much quality time with friends and family as you can.

Having another person in your life leaves less time for others you love, so make the most of being able to give current loved ones as much of your time now as you can.

Work hard, play harder and take time in between to reflect.

Your only responsibility is yourself, so enjoy having time to focus on what you want.

Learn to be okay alone.

You’ll get to know yourself better and it’s a quality you’ll need throughout your life.

Go on as many dates as you want.

The more, the better because the more guys you get to know, the easier it will be to know when you’ve found the right one.

Read hundreds of really great novels.

It’ll expand your knowledge and provide you with life lessons that will help to guide you along the way.

Experience what life has to offer — get out there and do it.

Appreciate being young and free because eventually, when you do settle down, you’ll feel far more content and have less of a desire to look back. You’ll be ready for the next phase if you make the most of your youth.

Enjoy the freedom of being able to make decisions based solely on what you want.

This right once belonged to your parents and soon, you’ll make decisions with your partner. But right now, you hold all of the power.

Buy the expensive bag or the overpriced shoes you love.

Eventually, your hard-earned money will have to go towards more important, less exciting things. Right now, however, it’s all yours. Treat yourself.

Figure out what you enjoy most and use any spare time you have to focus on it.

Learn to surf, get fit, write a book and take advantage of the time you have. It belongs to you and no one else.

Move to a new city.

If there’s nothing tying you down to where you currently live, don’t waste the chance to experience a new place, new people and new challenges. Home will always be there for you when you need it.

Be a “yes” person.

You have more space in your life now than you ever will; don’t let any opportunity pass you by.

As cliché as it is, try not to look for love.

It will only distract you from what you could be enjoying during the here and now… just let it happen.

Do all of this and more.

One day, when you’re telling your children about life in your 20s, you will be able to tell them how much you truly lived and how ready you were when you brought them into the world.

 

 

credit: Elite Daily

Yetnebersh Nigussie is a blind Ethiopian lawyer who was recently named a joint winner of the 2017 Right Livelihood Award, also known as Sweden’s alternative Nobel Prize.

The 35-year-old  lawyer was honoured for her inspiring work in promoting the rights and inclusion of people with disabilities. She was awarded 3 million Swedish crowns ($374,000) which will be shared among the three joint winners.

According to her,

“With this award comes international recognition, but with recognition comes responsibility. You cannot sleep once you are recognised”. Women with disabilities in Ethiopia face multiple layers of discrimination. My role is to link the two communities, of disabled and able-bodied women, that have faced historical discrimination.”

Nigussie co-founded the Ethiopian Centre for Disability and Development, a driving force for inclusion, and is now an adviser for Light for the World, an international organisation working to reduce preventable blindness. She lost her sight after contracting meningitis as a baby but said she was lucky to be educated at a special primary school for blind people run by nuns.

“We didn’t know that we would face isolation and segregation, as we were all blind. It was mixed, boys and girls, but all the women were leaders so for me, women were leaders. I didn’t understand until much later that women were considered to be of lower rank in society,” she says.

Her story changed at the age of 12, when she joined a mainstream school for the first time. She reveals,

“I had no friends for six months. Everyone played in the playground and no one noticed me. I was different. But I scored the best grades in school, and then everyone wanted to be my friend so I could help them. I became popular and I thought: ‘If I can excel, if I can bring about my own change, I can help others.’’

 

credit: fabwoman.ng

In a recent post which Content creator and positivity advocate (HIV/AIDS), Mary Ero, shared on her Instagram page, she narrated a short story of how life dealt with her andd how Banky W helped her.

See what she wrote:

“So today this happened. On the surface it might look like an ordinary celebrity /child-of-starstruck-parent photo opp but there is a deeper story here.

About 8 years ago, while about 6 months pregnant with this little girl here, I fell onto terribly hard times. I have chronicled most of it on my social media platforms but to summarise it, I was abandoned by my child’s father, lost my house, was kicked out unceremoniously from my job at MTV for no reason, and to crown it all, diagnosed HIV positive.

Shortly after that, my then best friend, with whom I was staying, decided she had had enough so I was given an eviction notice.

Long story short, I began to reach out to my friends and acquaintances to try to pick up the pieces, get a place to stay, deliver safely and move on. Suffice it to say that practically none of my celebrity ‘friends’ ever came through. These were people who would call me non-stop when I was in MTV but suddenly, I was invisible.

The only people that did were this man, @bankywellington, and @funlolafar. (Funlola I don’t consider a friend but a sister, or worst case my cousin anyway.😊) What was funny is that both of them had no knowledge of the situation I was in. I think this will be the first time Banky will be hearing of it. I just told him I was trying to raise money for a place, I think.

In those days @bankywellington had not even come close to being as successful as he is now. Yet the next morning, before 7am, he had driven from his place in Lekki, to my house in Magodo with cash for me. And as usual, a hug.

Now one reason people are scared to ask for help especially money from friends is that the dynamics of the relationship changes after someone has helped you out. People who give suddenly feel somewhat superior to the receiver or even feel that the receiver is a tiresome distraction. Not all the time but a lot of the time. However, with Banky there was never that awkwardness. I met him several more times as I managed to get back on my feet over the years and he never behaved like anything like that transpired between us. He was always warm, always hugging, always kind.

Today at ICM which I took my daughter to entirely by coincidence, I ran into him doing his ambassador duties at the Samsung stand. This would be the first time he would see my daughter ever. I had no intentions of her taking pics with him but he just grabbed her and asked ‘where’s your camera’? Then he began to tell her how he and I go way back. It was all I could do not to cry a little. As we left, my daughter asked “Is he a famous person”? I said “Yes. But more importantly, he is a good person.”

 

 

credit: IG, fabwoman.ng

Mizwanneka Nkuma Doris, the CEO HAIR BY WANNEKA is the last child of nine biological siblings and a beautiful wife, mother and business guru. The hair boss as she is popularly known, started her journey down this business path in 2013.

Worthy of note also is the fact that Mizwanneka is rounding up her degree in a private university and successfully manages her task as a student and entrepreneur.

For Mizwanneka, the inspiration to become a hair entrepreneur started with the insane idea of wanting to surprise her husband and prove to him that women can also be independent, make their own money and also stay successful without being a liability to people around them.

Also, her passion for human hair products was what made her decide on her choice of business. Many hair clients love Hair By Wanneka because of the style of advert used by Mizwanneka, as well as the affordability of the hair types.

She has several times shared her inspiring story of how she had to quit her business more than two times because the business had failed. With determination however, she started again and less than two years after, her business is flourishing.

Wanneka in her early days bought her weaves from a well known hair seller and resold them. She also went to banks and waited till the close of work to speak with the fashionable female staff to patronize her. From the banks, she moved to her church and  waited at the church gate for the service to end just to speak with the beautiful sisters from the church and tell them about her business.

Getting more active on social media was a huge success for her as she was able to gather enough money to buy a large stock of product, but unfortunately she had to start from square one when she was given fake goods.

Talking more about her business, she said:

“Once you give your customers fake hair, it is a huge task trying to win them back, so one needs to be very careful where you source your products from. It was a huge setback and led to distrust from clients. At some point in my business, I didn’t get patronised for over 4 months, it was really hard”.

Wanneka, who describes her style as exquisitely chic with a bold personality continually advises young start-up entreprenuers to be passionate about what they want, and be sure they want to stay in the business such that when challenges arise, they will remain.

The hair boss who is the mother of two beautiful kids owes a part of her success to her husband who was very supportive in helping her manage the children and do school runs most times, especially when she had to leave her store extremely late into the night.

She paid him in her own beautiful way by buying him a Range Rover Envogue for Valentine this year.

Also, in July 2017, the businees woman was able to open a new business with profits entirely from her first business, Hair By Wanneka. This new business she called Wanneka’s Lounge, a lounge located in Lekki phase one, a surburb of Lagos State.

Wanneka who is known for the fierce love she has for her children, Emily and Sergei also said:

“I made it mandatory every weekend to always spend time with my kids, even if I am going to the shop, we go together.  This is to sustain the bond. My mum has also been extremely helpful. Motherhood is a company on its own”.

When asked what she will like to do for  change, she says

“there are a lot of women out there who do not have opportunities like I have had, I would like young women to be persistent, strong and focused

 

 

credit: fabwoman.ng

Hello WORriors! Today is #WCW and our Woman Crush is the one and only Sola Sobowale aka Toyin Tomato!!!

Sola Sobowale is a Nigerian film actress, screenwriter, director and producer. She joined acting as a member of the Awada Kerikeri Group under the leadership of Adebayo Salami. Over the years, she had scripted, co-scripted, directed and produced several Nigerian films. Her roles in Village Headmaster, Mirror In The Sun and in the infamous Yoruba film, Asewo To Re Mecca, remain evergreen.

However, playing Toyin Tomato in the Wale Adenuga 2001 Super Story series, Oh Father! Oh Daughter! shot her into super stardom. She has featured in over 200 movies and self-produced over 50 films. During an interview, Sola Sobowale revealed that she has been acting for 40 years now.

She scripted, produced and directed, Ohun Oko Somida, a 2010 Nigerian film that stars Adebayo Salami. She left Nollywood and Nigeria for 15 years to focus on her family and recently debut her comeback to Nollywood with the movie ‘The Wedding Party’.

Some of her movies include, Asewo To Re Mecca, Eri Okan, Ohun Oko Somida, The Diamond Ring, Family on fire, The Wedding Party 1&2, etc.

One fun fact is that, Sola Sobowale doesn’t wear ready made clothes. She makes her own clothes.

 

Women Of Rubies celebrates you, dearest Sola Sobowale!