Oyinkansola alabi - Women of Rubies

In Inspiration July 24, 2023 By Women of Rubies

7 Inspiring Female Professionals You Need To Follow

In the ever-evolving landscape of professional excellence, women continue to shine as trailblazers, inspiring countless individuals with their achievements and contributions. In this article, we proudly present seven remarkable female professionals who stand as beacons of inspiration and empowerment. From innovative entrepreneurs to visionary leaders, these women have carved their paths to success, leaving an indelible mark on their respective industries.

Join us as we celebrate their journeys and glean valuable insights from their remarkable stories. Discover the strength, determination, and brilliance of these inspiring female professionals who are transforming the world and motivating others to reach new heights.

1. Pamela Anoliefo- The Scrum Master Trainer

Pamela is a trailblazing professional who immigrated to Canada with a burning passion for positive change and growth. With over 15 years of experience as a result-oriented Release Train Engineer, Scrum Master, and Project Manager, she has become a driving force in transforming organizations from traditional Project Management to Agile methodologies. Pamela’s successful track record spans diverse industries, including Fintech, Retail, and Financial Services.

Her expertise in Agile and Scaled Agile teams, along with her dedication to coaching and mentoring, makes her a true industry leader. Read more about her work here

2. Fola Adegoke – Trailbalzer In Cybersecurity

Fola Adegoke is the founder and lead Career Coach at Winfinite Consulting. She is a trailblazer in the field of Cybersecurity. With a passion for empowering professionals and a comprehensive understanding of career challenges and opportunities. With her expertise and passion, Fola has become a trusted guide and inspiration for professionals seeking success in cybersecurity.

Her journey is a testament to the power of determination, knowledge, and the relentless pursuit of one’s dreams. Check Fola’s work here

3. Kemi Ogunkoya – The Leadership Expert

Kemi is a celebrated leadership development strategist, management consultant, and author of the acclaimed book “The Leadership Guardian.” With a decade of experience under her belt, she has been at the forefront of conducting and facilitating impactful leadership development workshops both nationally and internationally. Kemi is also the mastermind behind The Dozen Model Leadership Framework, a powerful tool that has empowered countless individuals on their leadership journey.

4. Banke Oki-Balogun- The Educator

Banke Oki-Balogun is an exceptional educator with an unwavering passion for empowering young minds and transforming education. Hailing from a remarkable lineage of educators, armed with a Masters in Education and International Development from the Institute of Education, University College London (UCL), and a distinction in Master of Public Administration from Queen Mary University of London, Banke is recognized as a true authority in the field of education, even earning her a well-deserved Ph.D. scholarship from Queen Mary, University of London.

Her true innovation lies in the creation of Naijatutors Konnect, a groundbreaking online platform that harnesses the power of technology to connect exceptional Nigerian tutors with students across different geographical regions, bridging the educational divide and ensuring children receive the academic support they deserve. Check Banke’s work here

5. Oyinkansola Alabi – The Emotions Doctor

Oyinkansola Alabi, popularly referred to as The Emotions Doctor, is the Founder of Emotions City. Africa’s Leading Emotional Intelligence Centre. She is a Productivity Enhancement and Life Validation Strategist. A Psychologist by training, helps individuals, achievers and Organisations increase performance using emotional intelligence tools and proprietary methodologies.

Oyinkan is the first female founder of an Emotional Intelligence Academy in Africa and is the convener of Africa’s first Emotional Intelligence Week.

6. Nora Agbakhamen – The Impact Storyteller

Nora is a storytelling expert who is making waves as one of Nigeria’s most influential figures on LinkedIn. Through her work, she empowers businesses to get noticed and thrive by leveraging the power of content and storytelling. With a decade of experience as a skilled content creator and writer, Nora possesses the knowledge to elevate brands, boosting their credibility, visibility, and profitability.

Holding a Mass Communication degree from the University of Maiduguri, Nora’s passion for honing her craft led her to earn a certificate in Persuasive Writing and Public Speaking from Harvard University (HarvardX) and a certificate in Investigative Journalism from BBC MacArthur Foundation. Additionally, she has acquired multiple certifications in the art of storytelling, further solidifying her expertise in this field.

7. Ashley Wright – The Bitcoin Queen

Ashley Wright is a young entrepreneur and motivational speaker from Toronto, Canada. Starting her first business at the age of 17, she went on to create two successful ventures: The Wright Success, focused on self-development and business coaching, and Study Cryptos, an online academy simplifying Cryptocurrency and Blockchain Technology learning. Ashley’s passion for empowerment and innovation shines through as she inspires individuals to become their best selves and makes complex subjects accessible to all.

We celebrate these amazons for their tenacity and professionalism.

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In Career Gems September 7, 2022 By Esther Ijewere

Oyinkansola Alabi Addresses Mental Health Problems In New Documentary

Oyinkansola Alabi is set to release a documentary and a comic book that addresses mental health issues. The Founder of Emotions City, an emotional intelligence centre is committed to addressing mental health issues and proffering solution.

The documentary is titled, ‘The Story of a Girl Who Stood Up for Emotional Intelligence in Nigeria’.

According to her, the comic book will be released alongside the documentary this month.

She explained that the documentary tells the impact of emotional intelligence and mental health on some people she has encountered.

“We interviewed about 10 people who shared their stories that made up the documentary. We are also exploring technology; more so we are becoming a tech platform that creates emotional stability solutions,” she said.

On the comic book, she said: “We are trying to simplify mental health and make it go viral. People prefer to read the content title, wisdom and wilts, which is education and some level of simplicity and fun. So we decided to hop on a comic. We have done some comics before, which were shared amongst friends. But now we want to amplify the voices and make it go as viral as possible.”

She further stated that the comic book would be translated into 10 different languages like Yoruba, Hausa, Igbo, French, English, German, Spanish, Tiv, Efik and Russian with the help of volunteers, adding that it would be distributed free of charge while the translators would receive credit for their intellectual contribution.

Speaking on how the centre has impacted mental health in Africa, she said: “We created therapy gift cards where you can gift your friends, colleagues or anyone who needs therapy, that can reach out to us and come for sessions. We also had a therapy hotline for a year where people could call in and receive free therapy. We had to pause it because I was the one sponsoring and championing it with my funds and I just felt a year was good enough to do that but we offer free therapy from time to time when we can.

“This means I need to deepen my impact and look beyond offering therapy to individuals, organisations and schools so that we can include mental health in the curriculum. I will be more available to work with school, to create a mental health department, mental health cafes and include mental health in their curriculums.”

Alabi recently bagged a doctorate degree on Behavioural Psychology from S.K University in Benin Republic. She is also a productivity enhancement and life validation strategist. The first female founder of an Emotional Intelligence Academy in Africa, she is also the convener of Africa’s first Emotional Intelligence Week. A Goldman Sachs Scholar, Alabi is one of the 100 most influential and impactful women in Nigeria, 2019 and 2022.

Source: Guardian Nigeria

In self development December 5, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

OYINKANSOLA ALABI BIRTHS NEW INITIATIVE “NEGOTIATIONS”

Have you ever lost a deal to someone less qualified? Have investors walked out on you because you didn’t sound convincing? Have you tried recovering your funds from debtors to no avail? Do you desire to mend broken business relationships before 2020? Oyinkansola Alabi has a solution for you.

A lady stormed angrily into a car dealer’s shop. She was upset with the fact that she found out that the brand new car she bought an hour ago was overpriced. Knowing she could have purchased the same brand and model of car for about $5k less somewhere else was incredibly painful.

She felt cheated, screamed, and shouted till they called the cops on her. When the cops came, they perused the purchase document, then confirmed that ownership has been transferred whether she feels cheated or not.

The lesson in this as an observer is life does not give you what you deserve, only what you negotiate for.

Everyone needs a Negotiator and I am so excited to introduce our newborn, ED Negotiations.

ED Negotiations is here to furnish you with clarity and stability in decisive moments. Set up a crisis plan, identify power centers, analyze power positions, prepare all decision-makers to achieve your desired outcome, a wonderful initiative by the Lead researcher and facilitator of Emotions City; Oyinkansola Alabi , who in the past few years has worked strictly with thinkers, decision makers, influencers as well as the most vulnerable in society. She is shaping Organisational culture and instructing them on how emotional intelligence skills increase productivity, happiness and profitability.

For more information on partnerships and inquiry, kindly download the ED Negotiations brochure on www.ednegotiations.com/brochure

In self development April 21, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

SHE WRITES WOMAN: A SAFE PLACE FOR YOU

“Emotional wellness is not repression. Emotional stability is not denial. It’s not suppression, its expression.” This is why forgiveness must be at your own pace. Your emotions are to be expressed the way and at the pace they can. Forgiveness won’t take place in a day.But another very important thing to note is who you are devoting your energy to. Let’s face it, some people or situations are just not worth the stress.

“There is no love in marriage, friendship or family. Love is in yourself.”

Thirteen women gathered on the 24th of February, 2019, at Africa’s premier life clinic – Safe Place in Ikeja, Lagos for She Writes Woman’s Safe Place (mental health) support group. Since October 2017, She Writes Woman has run monthly women-only support groups in Lagos, and held some in Abuja, Ibadan and Kaduna. About 800 women have benefited from these groups.

Despite being a rainy day with elections just the day before, these women showed up for each other. We talked about things ranging from valid feelings to forgiveness, from important relationships to a formula for happiness. Our facilitator was Oyinkansola Alabi, an emotional intelligence expert and the founder of Emotions City.

The floor was opened with questions centered on friendships, dealing with romantic relationships and mental disorders, coping with heartbreak, abusive relationships, family issues, work-life balance, being emotionally intelligent and more. Truth is, when it comes to relationships, we all always have a lot to say, and lots more to ask.

Relationships are a very important aspect of our lives. They form the basis for purpose and a sense of belonging. Extensive research shows that having good and quality relationships can help us to live longer and happier lives with fewer mental health problems. Loneliness and isolation remain the key predictors of poor mental health. Research has also shown that poor quality or unhappy relationships have a higher negative influence than being alone.

With that in mind, our facilitator began the session with, “Your feelings are valid.”

How many of us truly believe that our feelings are valid? And how could we have? From a young age, we were continuously told, “Don’t cry, you’re a big girl,” “hold your lips” while crying, and we made to shut down as adults when we try to express our feelings.

Then someone asked, “What about forgiveness? Is it possible to forgive someone after years of hurt?”

“Forgiveness is a process,” Alabi answered. “The term, ‘forgiving and forgetting’ doesn’t exist.”

Ah! That hit me hard. Imagine my relief just hearing these words. The person who sold us this idea really pulled a quick one on us. I had always wondered what level of amnesia I needed to have in order to forget a wrongdoing. It just never made sense to me.

“You must forgive at your own pace depending on what you want to achieve. In fact, forgiveness is a three step thing – forgive first, restore second and reconcile last.”

I have seen first hand what the pressure of ‘forgiving and forgetting’ has had on us as a people. We have begun to suppress our feelings and expressions to just create an illusion that forgiveness has taken place. In real terms, what has happened is that we have transferred our anger and hurt (which are perfectly normal emotions) from the person or situation to a kind of resentment (a very deadly emotion) to our own selves.

Outlets like conversations, jogging and other physical activity, journaling, drawing, coloring, etc., are healthy ways to cope or release unexpressed emotions.

But another very important thing to note is who you are devoting your energy to. Let’s face it, some people or situations are just not worth the stress.

“Life is full of balls and eggs. Eggs are those things that when they fall, you fall. Spend 80% of your energy on your eggs. Balls are those things that when they fall, they bounce back up,” Alabi explained.

By far, this was my key takeaway. Key takeaways are perhaps the longest tradition of Safe Place support groups. At the end of every support group, we all take turns to share the one thing we’re leaving the session with.

Eggs could be your family, friends or anything so important to you that if something negative happens to them, you feel the impact in a dire way.

It hit me there and then that a lot of us have been doing this relationship thing all wrong. We invest much of our time, emotions and energy on people who are balls and then we live in this cycle of perpetual dissatisfaction and unfulfillment in our lives and relationships. Your balls will bounce back, your eggs will break. Think about it and let it sink.

We ended our session learning about happiness. After all, that’s really what we ultimately hope that our relationships will give us, right?

When people typically say they are happy, it’s because their current life’s condition or situations or happenings match their expectations. That means – Life Condition = Expectations = Happiness. When your life’s conditions don’t match your expectations, that’s typically when we experience what we call “unhappiness.” That is – Life Condition ≠ Expectations = Unhappiness

This means our great expectations from life and standards we set on ourselves may be the underlying cause of our lack or fulfillment. It might include where you want to be (career, relationship, living conditions, possessions, etc.), who you want to be and how to get to the place that would define success or happiness for you. It’s good to set goals and try to achieve, but sometimes our expectations are holding us back from enjoying life as it is in this moment.

So maybe you didn’t factor losing a life partner, parent, having an abusive partner, being fired from a job, not getting married by thirty. If that is the reality, you must first come to terms with it and then manage and adjust your blueprint or expectations. This means the expectations and standards you had previously set for yourself – consciously or subconsciously, especially in line with societal pressures – will probably have to change. And that’s okay.

For many of us who hold ourselves to very high standards, who value excellence and seem to want to control the outcomes of everything, this can be especially hard and almost seem like reducing our standards sometimes. But you’re not alone. The quest for mentally healthy relationships and living is laced with hard choices to unlearn and relearn new ways to choose our mental wellness over all else.

Join our next women-only Safe Place support group by texting SAFE to 0817 491 3329

About She writes Woman

She Writes Woman is a women-led movement that gives mental health a voice, takes back the misinformed narrative about mental health, normalizes mental health conversations, connects help with hope and creates Safe Places young people can talk without fear or judgment. Follow her @shewriteswoman and see www.linktr.ee/shewriteswoman for more features

In self development November 21, 2018 By Editor

OYINKANSOLA ALABI: DEPRESSION, ITS SYMPTOMS, AND CURE

During a Q&A interactive session

with Women Of Rubies, Emotions Doctor, Oyinkansola Alabi, shed more light into depression, its symptoms, and cure.

She said:

*Depression feeds on rumination and a pre-occupation with self. It can also progress from a state of cluelessness, hopelessness, depression, suicidal thoughts and then suicide.

*Social media has amplified insecurity and esteem issues. However, social media is a double edged sword. You decide its cause and effects. It can either empower or disempower you based on your
relationship with it.

*Anger isn’t equal to depression. You can control anger by deploying a tool called the PAUSE THERAPY. Always pause before you speak, while you speak, and after speaking to be sure you just made sense. Practice this pause therapy for at least six seconds daily.

*Quite a number of depressed souls are aware. However, you can slide
into depression without knowing. You can become unhappy, discont,
clueless, or hopeless.

*Stay away from disempowering thoughts. The truth is, we are all
STORYTELLERS and our life responds or reacts in the direction of our
stories, internal communication, internal representations and
conversations within.

*Understand that happiness is intrinsic not extrinsic. If we depend on
external interference as a source of happiness, we may never be happy.

In self development November 1, 2018 By Editor

EMOTIONS CITY BIRTHS MIDNIGHT LISTENERS, FIRST OF ITS KIND ONLINE COACHING & THERAPY THAT OPERATE MIDNIGHT IN NIGERIAS

For close to a decade, Oyinkansola the founder of Emotion City has helped hopeless, depressed, suicidal souls, discerning Individuals and executives across thirty states in Nigeria and in six different countries, get clarity, increase productivity and profitability.

Emotions City is the One Stop Centre for Emotional Solutions. We invest our Energy and human capacity in Emotional Intelligence Training, Consulting, Coaching and Research.

We map out solutions to Emotional challenges, develop insights and strategies to the most pressing personal and organizational issues, and impact the course of history by inspiring, empowering and influencing Professionals.

We are willing and available to serve every human being, organization, religious institutions, Private and Public Sectors, Government and Nations. We believe that as long as you are a soul with a body, you need to learn how to harness, develop, and sustain emotional intelligence skills and competencies.

Meet the brain behind Emotions City

Oyinkansola Alabi popularly referred to as the Emotions Doctor is the Lead Researcher, Intellectual Property Owner and Lead Facilitator of EMOTIONS CITY. The Incredible blend of gift and skill is one of Nigeria’s clearest and high impact trainer. She has trained tens of thousands of executives who desired to achieve a high level of Emotional Intelligence at Guinness Nigeria, Interswitch, Stanbic IBTC Bank, FCMB to mention a few.

She is the Principal Coach of Emotions City, an Emotions Coaching and Consulting Firm.The Cornell University-Trained Human Resource Executive, Certified Life Coach, Cognitive Behavioural Specialist, Licensed Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, only female six seconds network leader in Nigeria, is also the convener of the first ever Emotional Intelligence Week in Nigeria and arguably in Africa.

Oyinkan serves as an ordained Pastor under the astute leadership of Pastors Taiwo and Nomthi Odukoya.

We are ready to hear from you;

Midnight listener link : http://emotionscity.com/midnight-listeners/?fbclid=IwAR3pEDmpLYzELT-WnkuuOOBwGGa8Okk1b_5jyT-8vbEpxzd9_BraWMdOebo

Our Listening Line – 08021250367, 08125116740

Follow us on Instagram – @emotions_city, @EmotionsDoctor

Twitter – @emotionsdoctor

Website – www.emotionscity.com

In Editor's Choice October 13, 2018 By Editor

“I WANT TO HELP REDUCE THE NUMBER OF HOPELESS, HELPLESS, DEPRESSED & SUICIDAL SOULS IN NIGERIA- OYINKANSOLA ALABI

Last month, popular Nigerian Artiste Harry Song opened up on his battle with depression and cried out for help, while many mocked him for speaking up as a celebrated figure, one woman reached out to help him find his path and walk him through his healing process, that woman is Oyinkansola Alabi , popularly referred to as the Emotions Doctor, the Lead Researcher and Lead Facilitator of EMOTIONS CITY, an Emotions Coaching and Consulting Firm. The company works with leaders of various arms of Government and NGO’s as well as Business and Institution leaders at all levels, using original, home grown research and principle based methodologies.

She is one of Nigeria’s clearest and sought after high impact trainer. She has trained tens of thousands of executives who desired to achieve a high level of Emotional Intelligence.

The Cornell University trained Human Resource Executive, Certified Life Coach, Cognitive Behavioural Specialist, Licensed Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, only female six seconds network leader in Nigeria, is also the convener of the first ever Emotional Intelligence Week in Nigeria and arguably in Africa .Oyinkan also serves as an ordained Pastor under the astute leadership of Pastors Taiwo and Nomthi Odukoya.

In celebration of World’s Mental health week, Oyinkan shares her inspiring story with me in this exclusive interview as she highlights the cause of the recent increase in depression and her determination to give hope to those who are hopeless and on the verge of giving up.

Childhood Influence
In retrospect I think that my childhood prepared me for what I’m doing now because 2 months before I was born my father had stroke and that life altering experience introduced me and my family into a flavor of poverty and scarcity.I grew up faster than my peers because I had learned how to take responsibility for my existence.

I also promised myself that I was going to be the best version of what God created me to be despite my financially epileptic background. I must also admit that one clear value my parents transmitted to me was the yearning for knowledge.

I remember my father taught me how to read by giving me a book to read every week and when I was done reading he gave me a gift. I initially read because I wanted a gift but I later read to a point where I outgrew the gift. I knew I was consuming knowledge for my own good.

Meet Me!
I am the voice of your unconscious calling you to embrace your greatness. I amA soul who is passionately consumed by the vision to help adults take responsibility for their mental health and emotional stability.I desire to help as many people as possible in every state, every country, whatever gender, marital status, sexuality, religion, move from a place of emotional instability to a place of emotional stability, a state of unhappiness to a state of happiness. I am that soul who craves to help you increase your productivity, happiness and help live a life of fulfillment want you to know that we are not on earth to work, pay bills and die, you are here to enjoy your life.

Inspiration behind Emotions City

My desire to help people move from a state of pain into a state deep happiness and fulfilment ignited my desire to launch Emotions City.We actually launched the Youthmax Academy earlier which is arguably the first Emotional Intelligence Academy for Millennials in Africa.Then we started receiving training requests from Professionals and corporate organisations who had been informed of our unparalleled value and results. The essence of Emotions City is to help people live the best version of their life.We desire to help people reduce their pain, We desire to give life where death looms,We desire to reduce the number of hopeless, helpless, depressed and suicidal souls in Nigeria.We are also the only mental health facility in Nigeria who offers round the clock coaching and therapy service. While others close for the day, our midnight listeners are willing to listen and resolve emotional distractions.

Impact

I think that the results of my impact are in the quality of souls that I have been able to raise. I daily engage a principle I heard a while ago that, it is better to train a child than to repair an adult. I think it’s true because a number of professionals are repairing adults which in itself isn’t bad but I think we can become more proactive by raising kids instead.Raising kids is proactive, repairing adults is reactive.To this end, we have created sub units under the YOUTHMAX Academy called the Child and Teen max Academy. It’s been proven that it’s cheaper to raise than to repair. A broken soul at best will be remoulded but never restored to default setting. Only God restores.

Balancing it all

I doubt the concept work life balance exist, I think what exists in reality is work life integration. I integrate my life by living and existing one day at a time. I deliberately refuse to engage in emotional labour where I worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will take care of itself, My duty is to prepare and plan. So my responsibility as a Coach, Pastor, Public speaker and Mum are going well. I am not perfect but I am getting better at it daily.

Work Challenges

I am in a field plagued my men. Men who have been programmed to think it’s their birth right to lead. Men who support other men and will choose other men before they remember women exist. They do this not because they hate women but because they have been scripted to reach out to other men before women.The second interesting challenger is fact that some clients feel entitled to your time and expertise. They feel it is your responsibility to serve them for free once they reach out to you. Most of them haven’t been trained to take responsibility for their mental health. They have been trained to request for freebies so once your invoice welcomes them to reality, they freeze and some resort to emotional blackmail. This really doesn’t bother me because I am aware I can’t help everyone. I will only help those I desire to.

Other Projects

We are collaborating with some international organisations to help develop revolutionary products. We will disclose them in due time but for now, we are concentrating on making Emotions City the one stop centre for emotional intelligence training and solution.

Reward

My greatest reward are the evidence of changed lives. I am not on earth to be rich or be wealthy. I am here to help souls embrace their inner divinity. I am also aware that resources will be provided while being consumed by my passion.

Emotions City in 5 years
In the next five years, we will have moved from being just service providers into products manufacturers and global thought leaders. Are you wondering how? We will share details when we can.

Never giving up
No I have never thought of giving up. My noble goal is addictive enough to consume me. I however get tired and when I do I reach out to mentors, friends and family members. I must admit that I am blessed with beautiful relationships that service my existence.

Women who inspire me

Models like Oprah, Serena Williams, Maya Angelou, Bimbo Odukoya inspire me to do more. These souls lived / live for humanity.

Being a Woman of Rubies

One familiar truth I am aware of is that I am authentic.I am true to my soul. My public and private life are in sync. My words and actions also align.I think my authenticity and my voice are what makes me a woman of rubies.

Nigerians & Awareness to Mental health

Nigerians need more awareness and clarity on mental health. A good number of us actually think mental health is only for people with psychological issues.We haven’t fully come to terms with the fact that there is no health without mental health.

Cause of increase in Depression
The word is becoming more complex. Culture is changing. Economy is worsening. The rules of parenting, relationships and success are being redefined. Social media is brewing envy and jealousy.

These complex engagements are ultimately climaxing some emotionally unstable adults into a state of unhappiness, hopelessness, helplessness, self esteem issues, inferiority complex etc. Once all of these states set in and your internal affairs are more disempowering than empowering. You will question your existence. Once you feel you are not good enough, nobody cares about you, the world will be better without you.Suicide becomes attractive. Suicide is however not an option. There are at least five other options you can embrace and we can show you how at Emotions City.