On Saturday the 17th of September 2022, Safe Space Initiative held the 6th edition of the Tehila event themed ‘The Power of Self Discovery (losing self to find self)’.
Tehila is a support group therapy event for survivors of sexual and gender based violence that supports their physical, mental, social, and financial wellbeing. The event laid host to women who have experienced domestic violence, rape, incest, and single parents. A strictly women event this edition of Tehila held as a hybrid event, with two locations simultaneously – Lagos and Abuja while participants also joined online via zoom.
On hand were amazing facilitators who included: Osasu Edobor, Dr. Gbonjubola Abiri and Sandra Oluwadare.
The facilitators took the women through tips to discovering self in spite of the negative experiences while working at healing and becoming better.
Osasu Edobor, Founder at Safe Space Initiative, who facilitated the group session in Abuja, encouraged the women to take on simple exercises of journaling, staying present to avoid anxiety, and learning to truly reduce the noise outside, while they affirm and truly center on themselves. Practical sessions helped the women identify new things about themselves that there had ignored or not paid attention to.
Dr. Gbonjubola Babalola Abiri encouraged the women to learn to ask for help. They were reassured that in their struggles, the place of community that holds, binds and strengthens is reassuring and should never be taken for granted
Lagos Facilitators Dr. Gbonju Abiri and Ms. Sandra Oluwadare addressing the women.
On hand also was Sandra Oluwadare, a parenting Coach who shared tips with the women on being present. She identified the pivotal role of parenting especially with children of survivors who have also endured trauma. While mothers hurt, the cycle of trauma should be confronted with intention.
The sessions ended with engagements across the 3 locations with fun activities for the women, and information on reporting abuse through the herfessions mobile app. The herfessions App which is available on playstore is an anonymous community of women encouraging peer support, and a compendium of service provider in different state of the federation.
The sixth edition of the Tehila even was a massive success, and it was made possible by partner organization of WEVVO Nigeria, Dorothy Njemanze Foundation (DNF) and Rubies Ink. The session ended with the participants sharing feedback on program highlights and anticipation towards the next session.
Tehila is a quarterly event and we look forward to hosting the next episode come the last quarter of 2022.
Women of Rubies was created by Esther Ijewere to celebrate exceptional women. Esther Ijewere is an enterprising social activist, women’s advocate, columnist, author and the Founder of Rubies Ink Initiative for Women and Children — a non-profit outfit devoted to advocacy, development and social enterprise solutions amongst others.
An Olabisi Onabanjo University trained Sociologist, Esther Ijewere is the brain behind W.A.R. — Walk Against Rape, an advocacy initiative created to lend a voice for the victims of rape and demand justice, an initiative endorsed by the Lagos State Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation.
The NGO organises workshops in secondary schools tagged College Acquaintance Rape Education (C.A.R.E) in partnership with the Lagos state Ministry of Justice and the Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team (DSVRT). Esther, the initiator of Project Capable; a Lagos State Ministry of Education approved programme, Esther is the youngest recipient of The Idea Builders Women Mentoring Women Award, winning Mentee of the year 2010 and “Women Enterprise Award” from Vital Voices International & Exxon Mobil.
Esther Ijewere
She also won the award for “Best Use of Advocacy” from her Alma Mata; Olabisi Onabanjo University in 2012, for her contribution in fighting and creating awareness on Rape.
In 2016 Esther bagged four awards for her platform Women of Rubies, notably among these award is “Young Person of the Year” and “Wise Women in Media” awards.
She is a Fellow with Vital Voices Global Leadership USA; an organization founded by Hillary Clinton and aimed at empowering young women change makers all over the world.
She unveiled her first book on rape and violence against women, titled “Breaking the Silence”. She is also a columnist with the Guardian Newspaper, her page “ Women of Rubies” a platform used to celebrate exceptional women with inspiring stories, the page is a sequel to her award winning blog www.womenofrubies.com, which is fast becoming the one stop blog for the everyday woman. Esther recently started a platform for men called “Men who Inspire”, to further balance her advocacy work as an advocate, and also kicked off the #GettalkingwithEsther show to spread positivity on social media.
Kindly tell us the story of Women of Rubies, your career path and how it all started?
Women of Rubies was born out of my passion for humanity. I started out as a social activist, lending my voice to victims of rape, and other forms of gender-based violence. This evolved into the media, which is the Women of Rubies platform where I use my column and blog as a vehicle of social change to put the spotlight on other women in different sectors who are contributing their quota to nation building and adding value to the society through their work.
Looking back, would you say Women of Rubies and your other initiatives have achieved what it set out to accomplish?
Absolutely! We have accomplished even more than we envisaged ten years ago. Despite the losses we suffered, we have stayed solid and consistent through the years.
Every project we have embarked on has impacted lives and added value. We have served those at the grassroots and the high earned professionals. The ripple effect of the work we do is unquantifiable, and that’s the reason why even after 10 years, with all the bumps and losses we’ve encountered, we are still very relevant in the sectors we represent, because God is fully involved in everything we do.
Rubies Ink Initiative championed the first of its kind Walk against Rape campaign in Nigeria, The walk did not only encourage victims of rape to speak up, It also became an annual event most of concerned Nigerians and celebrities look forward to. We used different toolkit (workshops, media, information handbook, town hall meetings in different communities) to educate and sensitize the society.
We also got justice for several victims through our alliance with the Lagos State Ministry of Women Affairs and the domestic and sexual violence response team (DSVRT). The walk is endorsed by the Federal and State Government respectively. We have over fifty celebrities and influencers who are our ambassadors.
They use their platforms to educate the society on the scourge of rape, and aim for victims to get justice. The walk will be moving to other parts of Nigeria this year by God’s grace.
With Women of Rubies, we have given visibility and brought stories of different amazing women to the front burner, featured and celebrated over 1000 (one thousand women) through our Guardian Newspaper column, blog and social media pages.
We have raised over N5M funds for several women in distress, paid hospital bills, supported widows, paid rent for homeless victims of domestic violence and also re-integrate them back into the society. During the thick of COVID-19 pandemic, we were one of the organizations at the forefront raising funds for families who were affected, and we continue to support many.
Let’s talk about “Get Talking with Esther”. Can you shed more light on this project?
I am very expressive, I love to write and read from people, I love to celebrate people and give them hope, I love when I can feel people’s thoughts through words. “Get talking with Esther” is just about that. It’s a #Tweetchat session that gives you the ambience of a show on Twitter.
Basically, using my platform, years of experience, and skill set for social good to give everyone a voice. We fix broken tables, bring “Under the table” conversations to the front burner for positivity. We bring people who share life experiences, healing, and learning. My mission is to use the show to spread positivity on social media, especially Twitter. It will be 2 years by August 13th, 2022.
Intimate us about your proudest moments in the last ten years?
There are many proud moments, and it will be hard to pick just one. But I’d say each time I touch someone’s life, give hope to a helpless person, use my platform to celebrate a person who needs visibility and light up someone’s dark path, it becomes a proud moment.
The joy of giving back and paying it forward is innate. It’s my happy place. Above all, being a mother, and experiencing childbirth is my proudest moment. The joy of holding your baby in your hands. It’s unexplainable. I pray every woman seeking the fruit of the womb will experience this.
Kindly mention some of the lessons life has taught you?
Patience; life has taught me to be patient with myself and others. Setting boundaries is also one of the lessons I have learnt over the years. For a longtime, I didn’t have boundaries, and I ended up burning out and feeling used. The moment I started setting my boundaries, things changed. I learned how to say no respectfully without feeling guilty. Setting boundaries has helped me greatly in navigating where and who I give my energy.
Life also taught me the beauty of releasing power and letting go easily. While I am still a work in progress, these lessons have helped me stay grounded and focused.
You have a passion for women and single mothers. How was this ignited?
My passion for women is innate, I mean being a woman, I should love and support other women naturally. However, single motherhood is very personal. I am a single mum, I know and identify the pain and struggles of single mothers. It’s twice the sacrifice, and it takes a lot to raise kids alone. Spreading light to other lone parents is from a place of experience, love and understanding. I wish society would judge us less, and support us more.
Was there any time you had felt like giving in, wrapping your platforms and moving on?
Yes, several times. It’s hard to run an organization in Nigeria, especially when you don’t have core funding and lack committed human power. I almost gave up everything when my marriage crashed. My saving grace was remembering that my purpose is bigger than me, and my light is brighter than being a wife. Each time I have those wrapping up moments, I reflect on why I started and the beautiful moments.I will keep pushing against all odds. It’s an assignment and I have to do it well. Giving up is not an option.
Esther is smart, strong, opinionated, and kind hearted. She is determined, dogged and much focused. She is passionate about issues that affect women and children. She is the Introvert, who loves her own space, the multi-tasking single mum who works hard so her kids can learn all she was not taught. The deep soul, and very spiritual woman who prays a lot. The writer who writes with passion and deep understanding for humanity. The very private woman who prefers to share her work than her personal life. The playful, happy-go-lucky girl who is living intentionally. Esther, like every human is not perfect. She is a work in progress
What principles have worked for you over the years?
Putting God first, staying focused, honesty, diligence and speaking my truth against all odds. These principles have and continue to help me stay grounded.
How did you build such a strong following on social media?
That’s the power of consistency. I have also managed to keep a drama-free life on social media, separated my personal life from my work, and consciously use my platforms to support folks and spread love and light. I have also focused on being relevant and not just popular. I worked hard over the years to make my name a solution to a problem I solve. People gravitate towards value naturally. However, I do not take glory for any of it. I am just a vessel doing God’s bidding on earth. It is my hope that my light continues to attract and touch souls all over the world, even beyond social media.
Who are your role models?
My Mom for being a strong support system and instilling the right values in me. I always tell people that my life, especially my philanthropic side, is a reflection of good upbringing. However, I am a mummy’s girl with a mind of my own.
Oprah Winfrey- Her success and resilience is a vision board of what I intend to be and more. One of my late Uncles; Bolaji Rosiji, told me one time that my drive and passion reminds him of Oprah. It’s a compliment I hold dear to my heart. I wish to meet her someday.
Every woman before me in the development, advocacy and media sector is my role model. I have great respect for pace-setters who gave young women like me wings to fly, the ones who make room for us to grow and amplify our light.
If you were to start all over again what will you do differently?
I will align with people who have more expertise than me, and be more open about my struggles and challenges. Being in a society where you are constantly judged for your failure and mistakes could kill your morale, and make it hard for you to open up.
I am learning how to ask for help and lean on people who can add value to me, and my brand. Life is a lesson, I embrace everything with love, and open to change and best practices.
What is your message to women battling one challenge or the other?
Don’t give up! .There is light at the end of the dark tunnel. Don’t keep your problems to yourself, share with people who can proffer solutions and help. You are not your mistake and challenges, don’t let it consume you. There is always someone out there you can talk to, and ask for support.
I meditate, listen to frequency music, practice self-affirmations, focus on my power spot for energy boost, and stay mindful. I reduce my screen time when I am down and just be in the moment, appreciating the things in my present.
Watch: How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome
How do you unwind?
Spending time with my kids, Netflix and chill, and sometimes hanging out with friends and family who love me for who I am.
Mindfulness practice is one of my favorite type of meditation, perhaps because it’s easy, even for beginners. It is the act of combining awareness and concentration.
What is meditation?
Meditation is a technique used for thousands of years to develop awareness of the present moment. It can involve practices to sharpen focus and attention, connect to the body and breath, develop acceptance of difficult emotions, and even alter consciousness. It’s been shown to offer a number of physical and psychological benefits like stress reduction and improved immunity.
It doesn’t belong to any particular religion or faith. Though ancient in origin, it’s still practiced today in cultures all over the world to create a sense of peace, calm, and inner harmony. Meditation may offer a solution to the growing need to reduce stress in the midst of busy schedules and demanding lives.
Although there isn’t a right or wrong way to meditate, it’s important to find a practice that meets your needs.
I start with grounding, walking barefoot and feeling the earth under my feet, then I find a comfortable place to sit, and flow into breathing exercise to release stagnant air from my body.
Breathe in for 4 seconds, and exhale through the nose for 4 seconds. I do this 5×, then close my eyes and focus on my breath, while observing my body sensations, thoughts and feelings.
There are 8 other types of meditation. We practice at least 3 of it naturally but people don’t even know they are types of meditation.
8 other popular types of meditation practice according to Healthline
Spiritual: It focuses on developing a deeper understanding of spiritual/religious meaning and connection with a higher power.
Focused: Involves concentration using any of the five senses. For example, you can focus on something internal, like your breath, or you can bring in external influences to help focus your attention. Example includes, staring at a candle flame or counting your breath. It may be simple in theory, but it can be difficult for beginners to hold their focus for longer than a few minutes at first. If your mind does wander, simply come back to the practice and refocus. This practice is ideal for anyone who wants to sharpen their focus and attention.
Movement: This is an active form of meditation where the movement guides you into a deeper connection with your body and the present moment. Movement meditation is good for people who find peace in action and want to develop body awareness.
Mantra: This type of meditation uses a repetitive sound to clear the mind. It can be a word, phrase, or sound, one of the most common being “om.” , This is also a good practice for people who don’t like silence and enjoy repetition.
Transcendental: It was founded by Maharishi Mahesh Yogi and refers to a specific practice designed to quiet the mind and induce a state of calm and peace. It involves the use of mantra and is best taught by a certified TM practitioner.
Progressive: This form of meditation involves slowly tightening and relaxing one muscle group at a time throughout the body. In some cases, it may also encourage you to imagine a gentle wave flowing through your body to help release any tension. This form of meditation is often used to relieve stress and unwind before bedtime
Loving-kindness: It is used to strengthen feelings of compassion, kindness, and acceptance toward oneself and others. It typically involves opening the mind to receive love from others and then sending well wishes to loved ones, friends, acquaintances, and all living beings. Because this type of meditation is intended to promote compassion and kindness, it may be ideal for those holding feelings of anger or resentment.
Visualization: It is a technique focused on enhancing feelings of relaxation, peace, and calmness by visualizing positive scenes, images, or figures. This practice involves imagining a scene vividly and using all five senses to add as much detail as possible. It can also involve holding a beloved or honored figure in mind with the intention of embodying their qualities.
Incase you woke up today feeling down and weary, or you probably lost your spark or the energy to keep pushing, I encourage you to try the mindfulness meditation, just make sure you release your soul from worry and anxiety before you start. You can also practice anyother one on the list to help you stay grounded.
Temi Marcella Awogboro is a pioneer and change agent passionate about unlocking the transformational power of capital as a catalyst for profound change globally and transforming lives through her work. She has committed over half a billion dollars in impact capital across emerging markets to tackle some of the world’s most pressing challenges.
Temi is a core part of the investment leadership team responsible for scaling Evercare from inception in 2015 to a global platform comprising 30+ hospitals, 20+ clinics and 80+ diagnostics centers operating across 6 countries. She has been instrumental in leading the investment in building and operating one of the largest and most advanced private hospitals in Nigeria in a bid to transform healthcare in the region. Through her early-stage investment platforms, she is building and cultivating disruptive, transformative institutions that will emerge as today’s regional champions and tomorrow’s global challengers.
Temi was appointed by the President of Nigeria to sit on the Nigerian Health Sector Reform Committee under the Chairmanship of the Vice President of Nigeria. She also sits on the Equality Fund Board of Directors, Evercare Hospital Lekki Board of Directors and the Save the Children International Africa Advisory Board.
A recipient of the Future Awards Africa Prize, Goldman Sachs Global Leaders Award and M&A Advisor’s European Emerging Leaders Award, she shares her inspiring story with ESTHER IJEWERE in this interview.
Childhood Influence
I am proudly Nigerian with German and Scottish heritage. I was born in Nigeria, raised in the United Kingdom, and have lived and worked across four continents. My childhood was one of discovery, adventure, and exploration. While I never felt a stranger where I lived, I also never quite fully belonged. This lived experience forced me to forge a strong personal identity that was not wedded to culture, dogmas, traditions, and ideological concepts.
I was inspired greatly by the entrepreneurial spirit, work ethic and tenacity of my parents. My father was a medical doctor turned entrepreneur, and my mother was a Miss Nigeria beauty queen, technology systems engineer, and subsequently joined my father in building the family business that straddled construction, procurement and technology. These influences are intricately woven into the individual and professional I am today.
From a tender age, my parents and close family nicknamed me “Small But Mighty” because within my pint-sized package, came mighty aspirations. As a child, I always refused to be restricted by the limits imposed by external expectations of me, with a burning desire to push beyond the limits perceived in my mind or externally imposed.
Inspiration behind my career path
I am an investment professional with over 15 years of experience in developed and growth markets. I have always been driven by my belief in the power of private capital to transform lives and my passion to unlock the power of capital as a catalyst for profound, sustainable change globally. On this journey, I have committed over half a billion in private capital to tackle some of the world’s most pressing challenges.
Through my career, I have been uniquely positioned to operate at the intersection of healthcare, finance, technology and impact – often referred to as an Impact investor/healthcare operator by day and venture capitalist by night. As the Executive Director with Evercare Hospital Lekki and previous West Africa Lead of one of the first and largest dedicated impact funds globally, I have been privileged to have been part of the investment leadership responsible for scaling the fund from inception in 2015 to a global platform comprising operating across 6 countries and highlighted as one of the top 50 leaders that will “come to define the world of tomorrow.”
I have been equally driven by my belief in the central role of technology in creating a better world. Through my early-stage investment platforms, Kairos Angels and the Magic Fund, I have invested in some of the best minds and disruptive teams that are emerging as today’s regional champions and tomorrow’s global challengers.
The journey so far
My life’s course has been determined by doing the hard things. My Evercare journey started in 2015, based on my belief in healthcare as a fundamental right. On this journey, we ran into a number of unforeseen headwinds, which nearly stalled the project, not least of which was trying to commence formal operations during the COVID-19 global pandemic.
Against this backdrop, it was extremely humbling and rewarding to celebrate the key milestones and groundbreaking feats achieved within the first 12 months of operations at Evercare’s 1year anniversary on March 10, 2022. Some of these milestones include successfully completing several complex clinical procedures in cardiology (five open heart surgeries, two permanent pacemaker insertions), spinal surgeries, first-of-its kind paediatric surgeries in the country and becoming the first facility in Africa to get Safecare Level 5 certification on the first accreditation exercise.
While the journey continues and there remains much work to be done, I am indeed proud of the considerable progress that Evercare has made in the past year and especially proud to say that we are on our way to transforming healthcare in Nigeria.
Challenges
As I reflect on my journey to date, I have faced a plethora of challenges; navigating my career at the epicentre of the global financial crisis, encountering significant resistance trying to break into the private equity industry, navigating the extremely lonely path rising the ranks in male-dominated industries, witnessing first-hand the destructive impact of toxic leadership and failed institutions and juggling the demands of being a present and invested mother to two toddlers, while managing my professional commitments.
I have remained optimistic and learned to thrive under the pressure of doing the ‘impossible’ fuelled by a deep sense of purpose, an unrelenting tenacity, and an unwavering belief in myself. Failure for me is an unavoidable part of living a limitless life.
Other projects and activities
As we step into the fourth industrial revolution, I believe we are called to shape this technology revolution to empower people and create more equitable outcomes for our communities and the world. I am deeply committed to investing in entrepreneurs tackling some of the world’s greatest challenges. Through my early-stage platforms, Kairos Angels and Magic Fund, I identify aspirational entrepreneurs building impactful solutions, invest in this talent, provide mentorship, access to networks and functional support to power their trajectory. Across these platforms, we have invested in over 180+ entrepreneurs globally, many of who are already emerging as today’s regional champions and tomorrow’s global challengers.
What I enjoy most about my job
I am passionate about my ability to be a change agent and catalyst to transform lives through my work. This unique positioning has been fascinating and given an invaluable opportunity to work at the forefront of paradigm shifts globally. We are at a unique point in human history where world orders are shifting; new technologies are emerging. I have so many big and audacious dreams and I am excited to continue to bring these dreams to fruition.
Three women who inspire me and why
I live my life trying to take inspiration from everyone I meet. Some women who have made an impression on me include: Ruth Bader Ginsburg, who stood out for me as an unapologetic, unstoppable powerhouse, relentless in her pursuit of social justice and quest for equality.
Dr Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, for her role as the female to serve as both finance and foreign minister of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and the visibility she has brought to Africa on a global stage.
Finally, Kamala Harris when in her inauguration speech, the Vice President of the USA urged young girls to “Dream with ambition, lead with conviction, and see yourself in a way that others might not see you, simply because they’ve never seen it before.”
This resonated profoundly with me as a woman who has often found herself in male-dominated rooms with few allies. I struggled with the absence of female role models until I embraced the power of my own dreams and started to see myself as the role model I was looking for.
The resilience of women during the pandemic
As an investor in healthcare, I have witnessed first-hand how women have stood at the front lines of the COVID-19 crisis as nurses, doctors, caregivers, innovators and as some of the most exemplary and effective leaders in combating the pandemic. It is no coincidence that women led countries most successful in stemming its tide and impact of COVID-19.
But the pandemic has sadly highlighted the disproportionate burdens women carry and their inadequate representation at the highest levels of decision-making. And new barriers emerged to impede many women’s progress, such as unpaid care duties, unemployment and poverty.
Importance of educating and supporting women
I have been humbled by all the coverage and recognition received in this year’s International Women’s month. In particular, I was deeply honoured to have received the recognition by Lagos State as one of the EKO 100 Women. It is said that you can tell the condition of a nation by looking at the status of its women. ‘Women hold up half the sky’ and I am proud of the fact that His Excellency Governor Sanwo-Olu on behalf of the Lagos State Government took the step to recognise and celebrate the unending commitment of women to a more equal and equitable world.
Most important to me is the pledge to ‘support every effort to achieve a Lagos where all women and girls can live their lives to the fullest and achieve their potential without limits.’ My appeal is to continue to provide women a platform in the mainstream media and outside of 1 month a year. The strides many women are making are world class by any measure and deserve to be recognised, celebrated and amplified.
One thing I wish to change in the health sector
The single biggest issue facing the healthcare industry in Nigeria is the ongoing wave of brain drain, especially of clinical talent. Nigeria with over 40 per cent physician migration remains one of the leading African sources of foreign-born physicians. Evercare with its purpose-built infrastructure, best in class equipment, and focus on achieving quality metrics that meet international standards, is working hard to attract critical medical talent back to Nigeria from the Diaspora, thereby reversing some of the brain drain that plagues the sector.
It maintains a strategic focus of employing, retaining and investing in local resources to ensure a highly experienced, well-rounded, and diverse team, poised to support the advancement of medical care across Nigeria. I sincerely hope that my story and the work the Evercare team is doing, inspires more Nigerians in the diaspora to come back and take up the mantle of leadership to enable the nation to achieve its full potential both in the healthcare sector and beyond.
Being a Woman of Rubies
I love the concept of the Woman of Rubies as a forum for women across various walks of life to share their inspiring stories. As a woman that has risen through male dominated fields, trying to ‘have it all’, I am thankful for the platform to use my story to bring hope, motivate and inspire women all over the globe. I am striving to live life on my terms, fully embracing all aspects of my being and living the highest version of myself each day.
There is nothing that says you can’t be professional, ambitious, audacious, and successful but also be fun loving, free and love fashion. There is nothing that says you can’t hold down a boardroom and hold down your home. Women are powerful beyond measure, when we are liberated to demand and create the life we deserve.
My message to women everywhere is that you are powerful beyond measure, and your voice matters. Do not feel less entitled, expect more, take up more space and demand more, be bold in challenging the status quo. Finally, teach your girls to embrace a world of possibilities, to be proud of their ambition, regardless of their gender. Send them a clear message that they can be whomever they chose to be, and applaud them every step of the way.
I choose to live a life that is purpose driven, passion filled and performance oriented, and continue on my journey not focused on the pursuit of perfection, but led by the voices of those who christened me ‘Small but mighty’. They challenge me to create and compete; to build and nurture; to take risks and to leave my legacy.
Members of the growing and influential movement of social entrepreneurs and innovators, Catalyst 2030, will gather with world leaders during Catalysing Change Week 2022 in answer to the universal call to find bold new strategies to make the world a more sustainable and fairer place for everyone.
Launched at the World Economic Forum in January 2020, Catalyst 2030 comprises more than 1,500 people and organisations who are active in over 180 countries and who directly reach an estimated two billion people
For five days from 9-13 May 2022, you will have the opportunity to join millions of people across the world at Catalyst 2030’s Catalysing Change Week (CCW). CCW2022 offers the unique opportunity to engage with the world’s most innovative changemakers as they collaborate, co-create and share best practices.
The week-long event is open to everyone who is interested in learning about the growing Catalyst 2030 movement, its work and successes in tackling the root of some of the world’s most difficult challenges, as it seeks to accelerate attainment of the Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) by 2030.
Journalist and Founder of Rubies Ink Initiative, Esther Ijewere, will be hosting the virtual zoom session on Media and Public Policy session on the 11th of May. The session kicks off by 9.30am WAT, and 10.30 CEST.
The speakers for the session are; Gusi Tobby Lordwilliams of Girl Hub Africa, Senior Software Analyst, and Mental Health Advocate; Larmmy Ogidan-Odeseye, Journalist and Co-founder; The Gender Initiative ; Ruth Atim, and Communications expert; Rafiat Atanda.
“With over 250 sessions and activities between 9th to 13th of May globally, it is a privilege to be hosting one and bringing such a crucial conversation to the front burner, as it relates to SDGs 3, 5, and 8”, Esther Ijewere said.
Jeroo Billimoria, Catalyst 2030 spokesperson and one of the movement’s co-founders said the event provided a crucial platform for the social innovation community and world leaders to brainstorm and collaborate to explore solutions to these challenges.
“Time is simply not on our side and people are suffering unnecessarily as the UN’s 2030 deadline to meet the SDGs looms. We need to make the most of every opportunity to work together towards making our collective dream of a better world for all people a reality,” Bilimoria said.
“We are excited that Catalysing Change Week 2022 will again bring together a diverse group of experts, social innovators, entrepreneurs and leaders from the private sector and government. In a spirit of true collaboration we will listen deeply to understand the challenges and collaborate as never before to change the world for the better. Some of the problems that will be tackled include poverty, disease, food security and the pervasive global lack of access to basic services like health and education. Participants will tap into the collective wisdom around systems change while forging partnerships across countries, regions and sectors,” Billimoria said.
We invite the media and general public to join this panel session aimed at highlighting the role of the press and policy makers.
Please register to attend the Media and Public Policy session with this link; https://t.co/rmMhp3ECB1
Rubies Ink Initiative for Women and Children and Women of Rubies, put smiles on the faces of 100 seniors and vulnerable in Alimosho LGA and Makoko community with it’s Christmas Food Drive initiative. The project which was funded through the support of the public was a huge success.
The team went into the two communities to give food packages to the elderly in a bid to make them happy and feel loved.
Rubies Ink has been into advocacy, empowerment, and development projects since 2008, and runs multiple projects, empowerment workshops, trainings, campaigns, media advocacy, and women’s outreach programs centered around domestic violence, gender equality and women’s health.
They also organize the annual Walk against Rape campaign , celebrated over 1000 exceptional women through their womenofrubies.com platform, and raise funds online for women and children in urgent need of medical and other support.
Speaking about the Christmas food drive for the aged, the founder of Rubies Ink, Esther Ijewere said;
“Old age is a blessing, we need to continuously make our seniors feel loved and appreciated. The pandemic has taught us to live in the moment and be intentionally kind, that’s one of the reasons we supported our seniors this festive season, In our bid to spread love and light. We appreciate our donors for their unwavering and continuous support over the years.”
The Project Coordinator, Michelle Inegbese said;
“This is what we love to do, supporting those in need, and putting smiles on faces. Our seniors deserve that and much more. We hope to do this more often”.
You can see more of Rubies Ink work on rubiesink.org and womenofrubies.com, and follow their social media handles; Facebook- Rubies Ink Initiative for Women and Children, Women of Rubies, Walkagainstrape. Instagram; @rubiesink, @womenofrubiesng, @walkagainstrape.Twitter; @rubiesinkng @womenofrubies and @walkagainstrape.
Repressed emotions refer to emotions that you unconsciously avoid. These differ from suppressed emotions, which are feelings you purposely avoid because you don’t know exactly how to deal with them.
When you realize that you are repressing your emotions, you have to take drastic measures to stop it for your emotional and physical health.
I have struggled with this for many years, and it got intense when life happened.
I look back at some of the challenges I dealt with silently this year, and wonder how I survived.
I was in between repressing and suppressing my emotions just to stay grounded.
I battled with arm injury for many months, was on strong medications, yet I put on a brave front.
At some point, I couldn’t sleep for months as my pain kept me awake. I’d binge series on Netflix or pace my apartment, just to get my mind off the pain. Sometimes I practice “Mindfulness” through meditation.
I was struggling with balancing my duty as a parent, working, home schooling my daughters, and staying on top of things. I’d speak with folks and act “normal” even while I was breaking apart, drained and numb.
I have lived the past 11 months with repressed and suppressed emotions. Perhaps all of my almost 4 decades on mother earth.
I was encouraging people to stay positive, and telling them to keep faith, and keep pushing, yet I as dealing with my own physical pain that almost made me relapsed into depression, maybe I did and wish not to call it that.
I couldn’t lift the affected arm to say “Halleluyah” . Just giving a visual representation of how bad it was lol.
I was sleeping on one side for months, couldn’t sleep on my back either, as my shoulder blade and back were badly affected.
Esther Ijewere – At the beach In June 2021 for “mindfullness” while battling with arm Injury
While dealing with my physical pain, I had other matters that threw me off balance; from breech of privacy, Gmail account hacked, laptop bugged, trespassing, and attempted theft. Just to mention few…
I almost lost my mind, but for God, my commitment to his word and prayer, plus Therapy.
Through my pain I found a stronger purpose in Christ. I started praying better and objectively without season.
I even turned my prayer to conversations, like God was sitting right in front of me.
I can’t also downplay the role Physio-Therapy played in my healing journey. Grateful to my Physio-Therapist (s). Two amazing humans who focused on my healing, and made sure I didn’t downplay the level of pain I was In. I guess they saw through my “Repressed emotions” approach. *Laughs*.
However, I had to also address my repressed emotions through therapy, on the count of separating spirituality from reality. I committed more time to Therapy.
I became intentional with Therapy, digging deep into my repressed emotions, and sharing some of my painful experiences with my Therapist (s).
What emotions are you repressing or afraid to confront?
How do those emotions affect your life ?
What measures are you taking to address those emotions?
What kind of emotions are you trying to repress? Anger, frustration, sadness, fear or disappointment?
Perhaps you grew up hearing things like:
“You don’t have any reason to be sad.”
“Calm down.”
“You should be grateful.”
Childhood trauma is one of the major causes of repressed emotions, and could lead to chronic illness if not addressed.
It’s not always easy to recognize when you’re dealing with emotional repression, and there’s no definitive test you can take.
If you do have repressed emotions, however, you might notice a few key signs. These signs might show up in your feelings or your behavior — both toward yourself and other people.
People with repressed emotions often have trouble naming and understanding their emotional experience; I do. This can make it tough to describe how you feel to others, but it also makes it difficult for you to recognize when certain aspects of your life aren’t serving your needs.
You might:
regularly feel numb or blank
feel nervous, low, or stressed a lot of the time, even if you aren’t sure why
have a tendency to forget things
experience unease or discomfort when other people tell you about their feelings
feel cheerful and calm most of the time because you never let your thoughts linger on anything significant or upsetting
feel distressed or irritated when someone asks you about your feelings
Emotional repression can affect your ability to:
talk about things that matter to you
build intimate relationships
understand how other people feel
encourage of praise yourself
You might also notice that you:
go along with situations instead of expressing what you really want and need – I’m guilty of this one.
use TV, social media, or other activities to help you numb and avoid feelings you don’t want to explore
spend most of your time with other people to avoid being alone
exhibit passive-aggressive behaviors to deal with situations that upset you
If you have trouble expressing or regulating your emotions, talking to a mental health professional is a good first step. A therapist can help you explore potential causes of repressed emotions and offer guidance and support as you begin to address these reasons.
Therapy also provides a safe space to:
work on naming and understanding your feelings
increase your comfort level around talking about emotions
learn more helpful methods of emotional regulation
What worked for me?
Using “I” statements. Expressing my feelings with phrases like; “I feel confused. I feel nervous. I feel terrified.”
Focus on the positive. I do this through therapy and positive affirmations, using the “I statements”. I often say things like; “I am healed”, “I am whole”, “I am resilient”, “I am a magnet for light and love”, “I am winning at life”, “I am highly favoured by the divine”, “I am at peace”, “I have will-power”, “I am fine”….You can choose what resonates with your situation or midframe.
Let go of judgement. No matter what emotion I am feeling , I am learning to avoid judging myself I shouldn’t feel a certain way. Instead, I try finding a reason for the feeling: “I feel nervous because I just read something that triggered me”. “I am afraid because I don’t feel safe”. etc
Make it a habit. I name and share my emotions with the people I feel closest to, and encourage them to share their feelings, too. That way I create balance.
Above all, I take therapy seriously.
I am still on a journey of healing, and releasing baggages and things that no longer serve me.
I hope you find comfort in my article and confront your repressed emotions before the end of the year.
You can also read my article on Understanding the Impact of Trauma Here
Sending love, light and peace to anyone on this journey of releasing repressed emotions.
I try to stay away from sensitive issues to avoid triggers, sadly I can’t sit this Sylvester Oromoni issue out.
The 12-year-old who was killed at Dowen College by his seniors for allegedly refusing to join a cult group
My motherhood hormones won’t let me turn the other cheek on this case.
His dad’s account of the situation as revealed in the interview with Punch is heart wrenching 💔
They tortured and de-humanized Sylvester Oromoni.
Nobody should be treated that way.
Poor boy, he would have wished someone teleported and saved him from those wicked humans.
I have not been myself since I watched that video, it re-opened old wounds, especially when I was falsely accused of theft in the University & tortured.
I know I have shared that story many times, but it’s a part of my life that killed & awakened another part of me.
The torture & humiliation – I can’t forget.
Torture could make you wish for de.a.th.
The chants of “Oju ole re” as me and my friends took the walk of shame to the shrine we were taken forcefully to prove our innocence….
The look of disgust from onlookers as we walked down to Ijebu Igbo road….
I repressed my emotions for years, and blamed myself instead for following my friends to Bisoye’s apartment in Oru, Awa -Ijebu, that year.
From the moment I confronted my repressed emotions, I became overly ⚠️ cautious when I visit people & my threshold of pain doubled up.
I thought I was some hero for many years because I’d rather keep silent than confront situations, even when I was unhappy. I”d woman up…
I didn’t go for therapy…nothing.
Just went about my life till the wound re-opened after another episode of violence & psychological abuse.
I’m shaking writing this…no worries I’m good.
When I have the courage to confront situations, I become empathetic almost immediately.
I had a safety concern at home the other day, and instead of calling the police immediately, I focused on my luck of getting out of the situation.
I felt pity for the human who could have hurt me.
It shouldn’t be so, but it was a denial and numbing stage I’ve gotten used to.
I went about my day, and woke up at 5.37am, processed what had happened the previous day, and realized I should have called the police immediately.
I should have gotten this human arrested, she could have hurt me badly if she had a sharp object.
Self-blame kicked in again.
Trauma & Torture can mess your whole system up, no matter how many therapy sessions you go for.
Let’s not even talk about the PTSD jab that puts you in fear and flight mode constantly.
You are easily startled and frightened.
The pain lives rent free in your head.
You may experience very strong feelings of anxiety, sadness every now and then.
You are healed, but the reality of being human or hearing other people’s story triggers you.
You don’t want to be grateful at the expense of another person’s pain too. Perhaps that’s what I feel towards Sylvester’s death.
I have experienced other forms of pain in life, even worse than the false theft accusation, but that experience is hard to forget.
Perhaps it’s the residue of the torture, and the reality that those boys could have killed us, and made it look like an accident.
The sight of armful objects they kept as last resort if we didn’t confess.
All for what? N22k gold chain.
They were cult boys too.
I wish I slapped the day light out of Bisoye when she begged after we were vindicated, but I just wanted to go to our hostel, and get away from the humiliation.
They said I should always wish her well, but Karma won’t. That’s on what goes around.
Perhaps I need to document this in a book for closure.
For those asking us to take it easy on the boys who killed Sylvester, I hope you never experience what that little boy suffered.
I pray your kids never find themselves in that kind of situation.
I pray your kids never experience bullying and torture.
I hope they are not hiding their experience from you, because you don’t pay attention to them.
I pray you never lose a child 🙏🏿
I pray you don’t raise bullies who would become menace to the society.
Don’t ever judge a pain you’ve not experienced.
There are many people living with different childhood traumas, experienced at school or their home.
Some of us have mastered masking our pain just to look the part society demands, even when we are standing with our broken parts.
Justice must be served! Not just for Sylvester alone, but to encourage silent victims of bullying in our schools to speak up and break the silence.
I said I was “good” at the beginning of this write up, I’m triggered actually, but I’d check in with my therapist.
On the 8th of August, 2021 and to mark the one year anniversary of the tweet chat #GetTalkingWithEsther, hosted by Esther Ijewere, Kemi Oyesola, a coach, director of How2think Global Consultancy, and survivor of domestic violence was invited to speak on the topic “Leave to live: My Domestic Violence Experience.”
It was a moment of real truth and baring her journey, her mistakes and most importantly, her recovery and rebirth process.
Kemi Oyesola, our guest at the popular tweet chat dropped a lot of nuggets that had attendees reacting in awe.
Here are excerpts from the conversation and how it all went down.
This tweet chat was a moment of learning and unlearning and one thing that was constant in our guest’s response is the God-factor and how much role your thoughts play in shaping your life.
Those who attended the tweet chat testified to how much they learned when the Host asked them to mention what stood out for them. Here’s what they have to say about it.
Coach Kemi Oyesola is a living proof that you can rise from any hopeless situation. As long as you can find the strength, courage and determination to do so.
Find out more about the rest of this insightful tweet chat via the Twitter handle of the host or simply follow the hash tag #GetTalkingWithEsther on Twitter for updates on the next one.
London photographer Nadine Ijewere just made history as the first Black woman to shoot a cover for American Vogue
Ijewere is no stranger to firsts; she was also the first woman of color to shoot a British Vogue cover in 2018. When speaking to the cut magazine about the lack of diversity in the industry she said, “When I was studying, there were virtually no female photographers of colour…I feel like in doing this I’m proving to younger girls from a similar background that it’s achievable. It also feels like part of a broader shift within our culture to include far more diversity, both behind the camera and in front of it.”
The Jamaican-Nigerian photographer worked with fellow trailblazer, Gabriella Karefa-Johnson, who served as stylist and fashion editor for this historic cover. In January 2021, Karefa-Johnson made history as the first Black woman to style a Vogue cover. As she continues to break down walls, Ijewere hopes her work will pave the way for more Black women in a historically male-dominated industry.
“As a young Black woman, I didn’t imagine that I would one day have the opportunity to shoot a cover for American Vogue. I’m so honored to have been able to work with my fellow sister Gabriella Karefa-Johnson. I hope this encourages Black women that there is space for us to take in this industry,” the 29-year-old said.
This tweet chat was a moment of learning and unlearning and one thing that was constant in our guest’s response is the God-factor and how much role your thoughts play in shaping your life.
Coach Kemi Oyesola is a living proof that you can rise from any hopeless situation. As long as you can find the strength, courage and determination to do so.
