When you meet Adenike Akinsemolu, the first thing that strikes you about her isn’t just her drive but also her confidence. This youngster is a passionate environmental researcher, educator, and female child advocate. A former intern at Clinton Foundation, Adenike’s work and enthusiasm for youth and the environment has taken her across the globe. She is currently a lecturer at Adeyemi College Campus, a college of Obafemi Awolowo University, one of the youngest to take that position and also the founder of the Green Initiative. In this chat, Adenike reveals how anger and pain led her into advocacy and many more
Growing up
My childhood was filled with love and care from my parents. I remember when my dad got me my first bicycle, which was bigger than me. I would try to ride it and fall. My dad would encourage me to keep trying. And on this fateful day, I picked up my bicycle with no help and started riding. I remember yelling, “Daddy, I did it!!!” In that moment, I learnt never to give up no matter how big or impossible the task seems. However, I spent my teenage years away from my parents. This taught me independence. I worked after school hours. I remember working at Seven-Eleven, a convenient store where I sold coffee, cigarettes and other stuff as well as cleaned floors. I would work till 12am and wake up 5am in the morning to prepare for school. This taught me multi-tasking and hard work.
Passion for advocacy and development
I am a very passionate person. When I read the news or watch the TV and I see any form of injustice or feel something could be better, I always feel this anger and pain inside of me, which ignites my passion for advocacy. I have faced discrimination as an immigrant in the United States, as a female in academics, as someone working in a small town and as a young person with many leadership roles. I can relate to people in these areas. As for development, Ondo town inspired me. It is a small green town I am in love with. Ondo indigenes are doing really well nationally and internationally. Most of them are CEOs at a lot of companies abroad. However, the town is still very underdeveloped. These indigenes come home every Christmas or special occasions to show off their wealth. You will see them during Ekimogun festivals and other events donating millions of Naira to show off while their town is still stricken with poverty due to lack of jobs. It is only in Ondo town that you will see billboards used to display obituaries, birthdays and wedding ceremonies even though there are no industries. I can’t change the whole of Nigeria but I can do something no matter how little in my hometown. My dream is simple: using my head and heart to foster positive change in my own backyard. The goal is to think globally but act locally.
Being a young female lecturer
It is such a great feeling. I am able to mentor students, get involved in research with students and faculty members as well as share my passion for advocacy. My students see me as a role model and can relate to me both on a friendship and professional level. I am almost like them. I am still learning and they inspire me in various ways they can’t imagine. Sometimes it can be tough. Nigeria is a patriarchal society and we often equate age with respect. We also do not mind our business. There is also office politics that I try to avoid. However, I do not see these as limitations. I am in fact thankful for challenges in the system, they have shown me exactly who l don’t want to be and why I need to be different. “Different” is good and it is needed. There is this view that if you do not conform, it automatically equates being bad and that’s one of the reasons we are not progressing as a nation. They want you to be satisfied with the status quo. I am not. In fact, I am not “normal”, I have accepted that long time ago. Thankfully, I have supportive parents that let me follow my dreams and students who appreciate me and inspire me with their life stories. Some of them call me “mother” despite my small stature and youthfulness.
Greatest influence
Helen Akinsemolu, a woman of substance, my best friend, my mother and someone that inspires me to strive for greatness. This woman has it all: Family, Career and Happiness.
Inspiration behind Green Campus Initiative
The Green Campus Initiative was inspired by my students. In one of my lectures, I asked my students what they understood by “Going Green”. Astonishingly, in a class of over 250 students, no one could explain the idea of going green. About 98% of them simply had not heard about it before. When you ask an average Nigerian youth to participate in community service or volunteer their time in helping the underrepresented communities, they simply ask “What do I stand to gain?” or “How does that put food on my table?” You cannot totally blame them. It is the culture. I also noticed students discard their wastes in classrooms and around the school environment. Additionally, a lot of them do not have skills needed to survive upon graduation. How can we encourage students to live their life in such a way they do not harm themselves, the people around them and most importantly their environment? This question birthed the Green Campus Initiative. It was established to educate, engage and enlighten young people to live green as well as equip them with the vital tools to positively transform their communities, nation and generation. Our programs encourages students to use bicycles and other means of sustainable transportation, conserve energy and water, utilize renewable energy, dispose their wastes properly, become social entrepreneurs through the development of vocational skills and be eco-conscious citizens.
The Bill Clinton Foundation experience
Working with the Clinton Foundation was a dream come true. That is where I learned about the power of giving in the form of community service. My favourite President Clinton quote is “People who work together generally do better than people who fight. People who build, generally do better than people who wreck. People who learn, generally do better than people who insist on remaining ignorant and people who care, generally fare better than the heartless.” And that quote is something that has shaped me and inform my decision to return to my hometown (Ondo) and do something, no matter how small. Luckily, I discovered my passion for teaching and it serves as a vehicle to effect that positive change.
Projects
For eight years, I have been committed to educating young girls in gaining their voice and place in society. My Girl Prize Program emphasizes the role of girls in developing a sustainable green economy and fostering a positive impact on the environment. This is a scholarship and mentorship program for girls interested in science and specifically environmental sustainability to enable them build self-esteem, develop leadership skills and recognize the value of community service. The girls meet monthly to network, listen to experts on the latest developments in science, the green movement, and receive various trainings. As we say in Africa: “When you educate a girl, you educate a whole nation.”
Giving up
Engaging in positive things does not give you immunity from negative humans. It is part of the challenge and lesson to learn from. I always advise people that want to move back to Nigeria that if they do not have a solid backbone, a thick skin and ability to face all kinds of oppositions coupled with lack of support, by all means they should stay away. For me, giving up on my dreams is never an option. Never!
My greatest reward
Working in the education sector is a perfect fit. I love the fact that I am helping to create highly educated and responsible citizens, one student at a time.
Advice for budding entrepreneurs
Life is a journey, with problems to solve, lessons to learn, but most importantly, experiences to enjoy. All you need is a burning passion, an open mind and a compassionate heart. There will never be a perfect time to start a business. Start now, start right, start proud and don’t stop.
Being a woman of rubies
I am multidimensional. I do have my values and I am not easily compromised. I embrace my individuality. I follow my passion. I choose love and above all, I do things that make me happy.
Growing up
My childhood did in a way. Throughout my primary and secondary education, I was not necessarily the best student in my class, in fact I was always in the bottom pile in class. I thought I was dull and would never amount to anything good in life, since the notion we always had was that your life is doomed if you don’t do well in school. Things changed when I moved to the UK to further my education. As usual I struggled in the first two years of my A-levels, but I guessed I was still trying to adapt to the system. As soon as I entered the university, everything changed, I became among the top five in my class, I excelled so well and regained my confidence back. I felt I was now where I ought to be in life. Looking back, I realised what happened to me. The standard of education I received was nothing to write home about. My teachers should have done more to identify the subjects I was excelling in and help me build up in that line, but then you can’t blame them because they had more than a 100 pupils to cater to and naturally won’t have time and ability to cater to each person. This is one of the reasons my focus is on education, I believe the standard of education in Nigeria can be better.
Meet Me
I am the Founder and Executive Director of a vibrant NGO, Egunec Education Support Foundation (EESF), a foundation dedicated to creating a better Nigeria through Education and Community Development. I am a self-motivated writer and entrepreneur who enjoys the challenges of creativity. Increasing an individual’s capacity and potential has always been of interest for me, sparking my research to deepen my understanding and knowledge in this area. In doing so I have participated in capability trainings in the United Kingdom, focusing on Customer Service, increasing Job Interview skills, and writing the excellent Resume.
I am currently the CEO of 618Consulting; providing training for fresh graduates and equipping job seekers with the right skills for interviews and structuring CVs for their desired jobs. I authored the book Get your dream job without struggles which is aimed at providing solutions to the challenges job seekers face during interviews.
I am also an event coordinator. I am also the country representative for MasterPeace Nigeria chapter, an award-winning global grassroots non-profit and non-governmental peace movement, currently existing in more than 40 countries across the world. I studied economics from the University of East London and also hold an MSc. in International Money Finance and Investment from Brunel University, both in the United Kingdom..
Inspiration behind Egunec Education Support Foundation?
The inspiration behind EESF is the dream I have that one day, the quality of our educational system can stand side by side that of our counterparts in other countries; affecting lives in very large magnitude.
Being a writer, entrepreneur and a trained economist
I believe that God installed in us so many skills and abilities, focusing on just one aspect of your skills will just be a waste of time. Just like a mobile phone can be used to make calls, browse, chat and do many other things, we also can do same. This philosophy has helped me a lot because so many opportunities present themselves in life. If you don’t take advantage of the different skills that you have, you will lose out much. But to crown it all, it’s just the grace of God at work in my life.
Projects
Our projects are structured to deal with critical issues such as poverty, gender imbalance, child labour, trauma, youth neglect and underdevelopment. We are firm that people can be empowered through education and that could mean freedom!
The young people involved in the project usually learn different entrepreneurial skills such as tailoring, bakery, fish farming, soap making, bead making, carpentry, event management, etcetera and eventually start up their own businesses, earning incomes for themselves as well as supporting their families. This goes a long way to reduce unemployment and crime in the society.
Achievement so far…
We have empowered over 40 youths in Nyanya Zaimi, Nyanya village Hausa Gwandara, Gbagalape, Kugbo (1 & 2, Pyape (1&2), and Guduwa. They acquired skills in baking, fish farming, soap making, bead making, weaving, driving and in ICT, in which we partnered with New Horizon, an ICT firm in Nyanya-Maraba axis. The participants also received mentoring for three months, to ensure they perfect the skills and since then they have been able to train others. No doubt, this project significantly reduced the rate of unemployment in the aforementioned vicinities and can contribute to the growth of the Nigerian economy.
My Reward…
Seeing that lives have been improved and changed through EESF. Another is knowing that I am living my dream and in the area of my calling.
My keen interest in economic empowerment and poverty alleviation
Personally I believe quality education should be the bedrock. Women should be taught the importance of education so that they can encourage their kids to go to school. Many of the problems we face as a country could have been avoided if only the government concentrated on ensuring the educational sector is well funded and administered. I believe if this foundational level is good, it will go a long way in empowering children and the girl child especially.
Challenges
Lack of funds is the major challenge. Unfortunately, Nigerians have not really embraced charity as such, everyone seems to want from you but finds it hard to give. Also, there is wide misconception in these climes that once you are into charity, then you have more than enough. But that is not always the case with people who do charity work.
Managing the home front and work
God blessed me with a supportive husband who makes my job easy. The help I get from him makes joggling the two possible.
Advice for young women in the development and advocacy sector?
Never ever give up no matter what life might throw at you. What is needful is finding out the social entrepreneurship angle of what you do. This will help the sustainability of your organisation.
I am a Woman of Rubies
Women of Rubies are those who impact lives in one way or the other, I believe the work that I do has impacted various lives that qualify me to be a woman of Rubies.
Final words
You can become what you want in life, you don’t need anybody’s approval to launch out there. God has installed so much in you, don’t waste it. The world is waiting for you.
Popularly known as the Mother Theresa of Africa, Mama Janet Ekundayo dedicated her life to taking care of orphans.
She projected the meaning of her name, “Ekundayo,” which is translated to mean, “(my) tears has turned to joy.”
Mama Ekundayo had five biological children of her own but that did not stop her from adopting others because of her love for children. Mama Ekundayo enjoyed the company of children and so taking care of them came naturally to her.
In 1969, Mama Ekundayo decided to dedicate the rest of her life to taking care of orphans and abandoned children. She took in the 469th child by 2007. By the year 2008; she had cared for over 500 children.
One interesting thing about Mama Ekundayo was that all the children she cared for were from all over the country, from different tribes and ethnicity.
Located in Isanlu Makutu, a rural part of Kogi State, her orphanage is called Ekundayo Children’s Home.
Although, Mama Ekundayo received donations from kind-hearted individuals and other institutions, she also used her little provisions in caring for the children.
Mama Ekundayo always referred to taking care of the children, a calling she could not resist an she was said to be always full of smiles and also loved to sing.
Unfortunately in 2009, Mama died.
Not many knew of mama until Nigerian singer, TY Bello produced a song titled ‘Ekundayo’ in 2008 in her honour. The song was part of her popular album, Greenland.
Ty Bello’s Description Of Mama Ekundayo In 2014:
Holding my camera really close to her…silence fell again..in between her songs of praise she would suddenly pause and look up and out lost in a trancelike gaze at what only she could see. It felt like the earth stood still…then she would fall back into song again.
This must have happened six times while I made portraits of her. The moments were holy… I didn’t interfere but I knew it was fine to photograph. It felt like I came close enough with my lens I could partake in whatever it was that had her transfixed.
Strangely I was never too close… it was almost as if I wasn’t even there… that was exactly seven years ago. A year later, @tosynbucknor and a group of people had taken a trip to see her.. They came back with a gift. Mama had taken time to knit me a green and white ‘oja’, a traditional swaddle or scarf used for carrying a baby on ones back. Mama and I never really spoke about babies… I was also sure she knew I didn’t have any kids so it baffled me that she specifically told them to tell me it was for my son.
Madam Ekundayo passed away barely a year after her gift came. Shortly afterward, I got a call from someone else who had gone to see her before she passed. Mama made a gift for you TY.. She sent it through someone and it’s taken a while to come.
When the gift came, I was brought to tears… she sent a photograph of herself and had knitted the exact green and white scarf she sent a few months before. Five years later, I’m a mother of twin boys.. I stare at her photos and wonder what she gazed at in a distance.. Did she see God..? Did she see the future..? I can say this for sure…. I’m certain she saw my sons…
We celebrate Mama today and always. Thanks for touching lives,Keep sleeping well in the bossom of the most high.
Source: woman.ng
When you meet Yetunde you would think she has it all going well for her till you hear her story. Her zeal and optimism seems to be her secret weapon. She became an amputee same day she lost her husband in a fatal accident that almost took her life. .It was as if her life has been cut short. She rose from the ashes of the adversity and took responsibility for her life. In this interview, Yetunde reveals how she survived that dark phase in her life and how she is using her story to advocate for amputees and touch lives. In commemoration of the International day of persons with disability, we celebrate Yetunde and other amputees.
Meet Me
My name is YETUNDE MORENIKEJI AJANI RAJI, also known as Apple of God’s Eyes…I am a 46 years old pretty Amputee, widow, and a great mother of three children who are priceless gems. I am caring, sensitive, and adorable. I am a graduate of Banking and Finance from OSCOTECH and have a Post graduate diploma from Lautech. I was into Gold jewelry and lace/brocade business till we had our horrific road traffic accident in May 31st 2012. I got married to my best friend in 1996. My Adeniyi became my father, mother, brother, sister, a very faithful friend and of course my very first child right from the day we became one.. He was a very dedicated father, loyal husband to me, and a great friend to anyone, a mentor, excellent teacher and a son anyone would be proud to have. He was a wonderful physician, a great Consultant, an Hematologist with passion. A true medical practitioner to the core that observed all medical etiquettes… How I wish we have many of his kind in this country not just in medical field but in every corners of the sectors, the world might have been a better place.
The accident that changed my life
I lost the only friend I have (my hubby) the same day I became a Widow and an amputee and also lost my health on that terrific day that I wish I could erase from my calendar. The accident happened barely two weeks after my husband’s 47th birthday in a road traffic accident in the kingdom Of Saudi Arabia by a fellow that broke through that red light. That was how my dearest’s journey on earth was cut short and our lives were shattered, but God is ever faithful! The month of May happened to be my favorite in the past as it was hubby’s birthday month, 16th of May. The accident happened tragedy on May 31st…Just a day to our eldest son’s birthday which was 1st of June. My baby sister was meant to get married a month after the accident but the wedding had to be postponed because my hubby was scheduled to give out her hand in marriage. God, The Omnipotent, Omnipresent, The Alpha, The Omega gave me a special gift through my sister four years later. While I was crying that night because it was my “ampuversary night”, my sister gave birth to a baby boy same day and named him after my daughter in far away the United States. Honestly, for one to be truly happy, one need to let go of what’s gone completely and be grateful for whatever is left and look forward to what is coming next. That’s my approach to life issues now.
Life without my husband
I don’t just miss just one thing about him because, there is no way one will miss just one thing about such person.. He was a rare breed!!! He was light in every dark corner. I miss everything about him.. I miss his praises when I think I am not doing something the right way. I miss him scolding me whenever I was off the track. I sincerely miss our eating together, since I married him. We had no separate plates, even if we wanted to take local flakes-garri except when he was not in town or taking his coffee. I just started eating alone few years back, I have never being alone in my life’s journey. He was ever there, never absent.
Being an Amputee
Let me return all thanks to the Almighty God for this rare but great privilege of putting me in this position at this very moment to inspire millions, note that it could have been the other way round because, like I always tell people, if there was anyone that ought to have stay between husband and I, he should have been the one, what criteria God used, I don’t know.. He was just too good in every aspect of life. Let me state it here that my leg wasn’t amputated by any doctor, the left leg was actually cut off from the accident scene. The right one was meant to be amputated by doctors because, it was “badly broken” but was saved by open reduction with internal fixation surgery. Got plates and screws there. I never realised we have many Amputees around until I started getting inbox messages from some asking if I am truly an amputee till date. Some have been there before me but just couldn’t come out, some claimed to be ashamed of the “new them” but, I scaled that first hurdle of acceptance the moment my children accepted the new me, Their new mummy with still old affectionate, caring and dotting heart.
Writing a Book
I am working on a book that I want the entire world to read and never get tired of reading… I want to be a rainbow in those depressed and frustrated souls, I want God to use my story to lift people. I remember i went for this inspirational TV program last year and was told they will not air the program much latter without any pictures backup.. Because, my story to them sounds/looked like one from a movie scene. Of course, I did not have pictures but while talking to a friend about it months after, I got some pictures of after how the accident occurred, gave them to the TV show, and that was how the program went on air and I tell you, I started getting calls even when I go to market, malls, I hear things like.. “Madam, your story restore lost something in me”… Oh!! You’re Mrs Raji, I thought it’s all over but, listening to your scary story put everything back”..
I remember a scenario of a guy trying to market his product and after telling him I wasn’t interested, he turned and asked, “ Are you Mrs.Raji Yetunde and when I said yes, he was so excited. He said you’re a winner and I love your killer voice no one will miss that.
I am a Woman of Rubies
I am a Strong Woman Of Rubies because, I am very thankful for all setbacks and comebacks. I am a special woman that was put into that ‘HOT FIRE AND I CAME OUT STRONGER AND BETTER AND STILL VERY DESIRABLE TO EVERY GOOD SOUL’ especially to those that have fear of God.
Final Words
I can never ever thank God enough, it could have been worse you know. Awesome Is My God. Thank you for this opportunity. God bless all the great fathers out there. God bless all wonderful mothers. God bless single fathers/mothers playing duo role. God bless every physically challenge out there. God bless and ease daily Amputees affairs. God please bless my children for accepting the new me.
Toke Makinwa is one of the most popular media personalities in Nigeria. She recently became an author with the unveiling of her new book “On Becoming”, in which she shares her story and pain to inspire women who have gone or are going through similar situations.
Penning the book was informed by her decision to document some of the personal losses she has suffered over the years and how she successfully made it through the most difficult time of her life.
In this exclusive interview with Esther Ijewere, Toke reveals why she wrote the book and her aspirations.
Childhood Influence
I like to think that we are the sum of all our experiences and the past definitely is the bedrock which the future is born. So, yes I will say my childhood played a vital role in the woman that I am Becoming. I learnt independence at a very young age, I watched things quickly change with the loss of both my parents at a very tender age, I became very aware quickly of how things can quickly change and not until recently did I realise that I held on to the familiar and feared change and change should be embraced not feared. In the book “On Becoming”, I share my journey to overcoming that fear.
Inspiration behind the book
It is important to tell your story or else the world will tell it for you. There was a lot of mystery around the Toke Makinwa brand and last year I had my life thrown into a storm that shook my very core. My journey to healing and getting my life back in order was not an easy one, In my pain, I found purpose and the message of “On Becoming” was conceived. My faith was questioned but looking back now I see that it has all worked out the way God ordained that it would.
In the fire I had a peace I could not explain and that could only come from God, I knew somehow that there was a message in all of the mess and when the word came to write a book, I was weary, confused, unsure, scared but I thought about the million and one women out there and men who are currently or at some point have dealt with a setback of some sort and it made me feel like i had a mission to spread the word, to share their pain and make see reason to get up and fight the urge to give up! It is very easyto let go, there is a lot of pain in the world today we need more successful stories of survival to encourage everyone who reads ‘On Becoming’.
Marital challenge as a propeller
The thought of writing a book never crossed my mind, I wish I could take credit for it all but a book was the last thing on my mind. I thought maybe when I am old and about to retire, I didn’t think my life was interesting enough. At the start of every year I usually talk to God about the past year and my plans in the New Year and in 2015 it was no different. I heard the word to write a book but I quickly dismissed it.
I would meet people who would mention the idea of a book and I knew it was no coincidence. It would make me toy with the idea but I wasn’t sure still what the idea was and then June came and everything changed. While i was trying to find my way out of the murky waters, writing became a way out and I would document how I felt everyday. On Becoming was a message from God and sometimes all has to fall apart so things could come together again so beautifully, so it had to happen.
Every woman deserves to “Become”
I think every woman who reads On Becoming will have different emotions at different times. It is honest, it discusses so many things that we do not talk enough about and It is my belief that women need to speak more. To share more, It is my hope that anyone who reads the book will have the courage to Become and that is why the title is open “On Becoming……’ I want people to fill in what they are becoming after they read the book.
Nervous while writing
Writers block, there were times I just didn’t know how I felt and I would leave the project to nurse myself and get back into it again. I went through a lot of emotion, it was as if I was reliving certain events and it was difficult. I was also nervous about sharing intimate parts of my life but that was quickly replaced with the purpose I felt beat through my heart. It had to be done. I want people to read the book “On Becoming” and know that its ok whatever way life has dealt with you.
Giving up
Yes, I had a lot of moments where I felt like running away but something inside of me kept pushing me. They say where God leads he provides, even when we encountered so many hiccups, God showed up all the time. It became clearer as we progressed and at some point fear turned into excitement. The book is going to change lives and It is not because I wrote it, well….Maybe, but in all honesty, it will leave you determined to make the changes that you need to, it will also bring healing and closure and it will help anyone on a journey to discover themselves
Being an Author
I’m only just getting comfortable with my new status as an Author, I am excited and also ready to fill in the big shoes. To whom much is given, so much more is also expected so I am looking forward to becoming a bigger brand, I like how I am doing so many things and they flow into themselves. I cannot wait for the world to see the major plans we are working on.
Do women really support other women?
To be candid, we have come a long way but there is still so much to be done. We can tolerate each other less and love more. Support more, be a source of inspiration to another woman today, look out for her, share her pain and rejoice in her joys. The Book “On Becoming” shares some insight on this particular issue
Rising above Controversies
When you find your purpose, you are pretty determined to pursue it like your life depends on it and on that journey, it is a special journey (walking in purpose), you drown out the noise and stay focused on becoming more. I am so passionate about my platform and how It can inspire a lot of people out there, I don’t dwell on the negativity. It comes with the territory so I don’t lose sleep over it.
The Movement “On Becoming”
Every woman should get ready for some honesty, I shared to encourage you to also get the courage to speak up, I hope the book encourages you to take a chance. The movement of ‘On Becoming’ is only just beginning, 2017 is looking like a very busy year already and I am ready. The 6 months tour will take ‘On Becoming’ to different countries and I cannot wait to meet so many people and hear their stories too.
With so much enthusiasm, I listened on. The recruiter profiled the job and how I was well suited for the role. How the hiring manager profiled me and how I was a good fit for the company. A couple more minutes and the tone change……By the way.
His ‘by the way’, heralded a deeper tone, a more serious one, very affirmative and concise and suggestive of something serious.
I pressed my phone closer to my ear, it was a ‘but’ situation, but in a different kind of way. He continued on how they company was desirous of more growth, a notch higher on skill set and some fundamentals which they were looking out for. How as usual most candidates feel they meet all the criteria but someone else had a more relevant strength or experience. The conversation was coming to an end. This time more negative than it had started, tones dropped, pitch lowered, It landed roughly, maybe he didn’t know how to say it, maybe it was suggestive, it just wasn’t quite clear.
This situation plays out often within the recruiter and the candidate. If a recruiter has decided to give feedback, it needs to be given quickly so the candidate doesn’t keep hanging on. Or the awkward feeling of simply hoping the candidate gets the message when they don’t hear anything back from the recruiter.
An important part of the recruitment and selection process is the opportunity for applicants to have good quality, constructive feedback following interviews. However, feedback is rarely given, partly because organizations fear legal risk or because they do not know how best to convey it. However, it’s highly important to share feedback after an interview especially when the candidate has gotten to the final selection process.
READ ALSO : MY NEED, MY WANTS…
Feedback can be shared orally or in written form. Here are a few essential steps to giving feedback:
- Clearly and quickly stated – candidates need actionable, constructive feedback, get to the point without being brutal. Ensure the applicant understands the feedback by asking them questions and summarising.
- Descriptive rather than evaluative – describe what the applicant said or did and the impact that had on you or others, but do not make judgements
- Specific – by providing examples with specific reference to the person spec criteria which were not met or where the evidence was weak.
- Sensitively delivered – identify strengths and weaknesses, giving equal time to each. Make difficult messages easier to receive by alternating them with the positive points.
- Sufficient – to ensure that feedback is helpful. Candidate must understand the information and be able to do something about it.
- Thank the applicant. – for their time, energy, resources and interest in your organization
It is very important that feedback is prepared before contacting the applicant, usually notes from shortlisting/interview or application forms would come in handy.
More organisations today are beginning to value the importance of giving feedback as it acts as good PR and also helps the candidate understand their weaknesses and strengths. It is advisable to take feedback positively, look on the bright side as there’s always room for improvement. People’s (candidate’s) own ideas about how they think they are perceived and how they actually are perceived in interviews can differ greatly, feedback gives an opportunity to close the gap.
Bukola Afolabi Ogunyeye is the Executive Director and Founder of Morna International Children’s Foundation (MICF). She studied Marketing at the Federal Polytechnic Ilaro, Ogun State. She also has a Master’s degree from the University Of Calabar. A Child’s Rights activist, and member of National Children’s Advocacy Centre Huntsville, USA, she was sexually abused at the age of seven by a family friend, but she only broke silence after 25 years. Bukola shares with us her life experiences, tale of survival and the inspiration behind her initiative.
Childhood
I was sexually abused at age seven. I remember vividly how a man (known to my family), who couldn’t have been less than 40 years called me into his office, made me sit on his laps and he fingered me. I was so scared and ashamed. I remember asking him to let me go. Then he stood, walked towards the door to his office and told me he would shut the door and I wouldn’t be able to do anything. I stood there very afraid, but he eventually let me go. I never told anyone what he tried to do to me. I remember it took me about 25 years before I could talk about it to a very close friend.
Touching a child’s private part(s) is sexual abuse. It is not only when penetration happened that we say a child has been sexually abused. Nobody has the right to touch a child’s private parts. They are private to a child. I also started touching myself afterwards into adulthood. It was later I discovered that the childhood experience was responsible for it.
All about me
I am Bukola Afolabi Ogunyeye, the Executive Director and Founder of (MICF). I am a native of Ibonwon in Eredo local government area of Lagos State. I’m a businesswoman, an author and was formerly a banker. I also have a passion for women issues, which has been there since my childhood. It’s so obvious that women are being maligned in this part of the world; hence I am an advocate of gender equality. My hobbies are reading and listening to music. My best food is rice and plantain.
Inspiration behind Morna International Children’s Foundation
I have always wanted to work with children, orphans and destitute. I never knew I would start, when I did, as I thought I would wait till I was well advanced in age. But as fate would have it, I started earlier than planned. I believe for a better Nigeria and the world at large, we must focus on children. My vision is to build a world, where children are respected and protected from any form of abuse.
Project and activities
Two years ago, Morna International Children’s Foundation (MICF) got its certificate of incorporation from Corporate Affairs Commission of Federal Republic of Nigeria. In the past two years, we have reached out to over 60 nursery, primary and secondary schools within and outside our community. We have also attended numerous P.T.A meetings, where we talked to parents on prevention of Child Sexual Abuse.
We take our campaigns to churches, as well as Arabic schools and are actively engrossed in rallies to further spread our message on child abuse. We also tell children about their rights. We empower them with the knowledge of their fundamental human rights. We have participated in international programmes, such as International Day of the girl-child, 19 days of Activism towards World Day for prevention of Child Abuse. The Child Abuse awareness month, which is April, has taken us to the market community for our campaign
War against Child Abuse
This is a project, which we just want to start. We want to start a quarterly aggressive campaign against Child Abuse in our community, beyond which we will spread across every state in Nigeria.
Never felt like giving up
I have never felt like giving up. This is because, when I set out to do something, I keep going, no matter what. I hardly get discouraged over anything; talk less of something I have a passion for. Whatever I get discouraged at, there is most likely no other way out of such a thing. I can never give up on this cause. However, I make sure I do away with negative people, who try to discourage me directly or indirectly.
Positive feedbacks
This question is very difficult for me to answer because this work is more about giving and not expecting any form of reward. I mean that you are not focused on reward, but the work. However, I can say that my reward comes in the form of encouragement and positive words. I also receive phone calls from people I don’t know, thanking me tremendously for the campaigns we do in schools, and rallies. In other words, whenever I get feedback, most especially from people I don’t know or people that recognise me from events, where I spoke and I hear their remarks, I am always encouraged. These kinds of reactions are priceless to me. These are what I consider my reward.
Lack of funds and passionate people
Lack of fund is a major challenge I am facing in this work. It can exterminate one’s vision, no matter how passionate you are about your cause. NGOs are not intended for profit making, yet you must spend money on programmes and you also pay volunteers some stipend. You pay for office space and bills attached. You pay for running costs. You just can’t do without money.
Another challenge I am facing is getting passionate people, who are ready to work without money as their focus. We know we must pay our staff and volunteers, but that should not be their motivation.
Determination
My advice to anyone wanting to go into any form of business or humanitarian work is that they should follow their passion vigorously and be determined to succeed and add value. Determination is very crucial in whatever one wants to do. Without determination, you will get discouraged easily. Be determined and make a difference! An Entrepreneur must also be ready to go the “extra mile” for his or her clients.
An exceptional woman of rubies
I am a very zealous woman, strong-minded, a go-getter and very focused. I’m a high-flier and I work self-sacrificingly. I can accomplish anything I want to. I believe I can do what has been established as impossible! I also try to be a motivator to other people, young and adults. I am someone, who concentrates on the positive side of people.
’Stupid man, e be like say you don craze for head there!’’
‘’No, na your papa own this road abi. Na why you dey do anyhow. No be your fault. Wakaa!!!’’
These were the likely regular conversations I hear in public transport. I, not being so knowledgeable in driving couldn’t just see the justification in exchanging words on the road. I ask myself, ‘’Where are your manners, oh ye son of man?’’
Well, soon enough, I got to share in these little road dramas as I experienced them in 3D. I mean, I have always itched to drive. The multiple knocks and shouting ontop of my head during the driving lessons from my beloveth elder brother were not discouraging enough to have me back down driving.
You must be thinking driving in Abuja is some easy-peasy akara and bread task. Wrong! You see, this City, Abuja probably has the most notorious and last nerve breaking set of careless motorists. No day passes by without meeting at least one of them on the roads.
So, I’ve decided to group the type of drivers I’ve encountered in Abuja. You can include your experience(s) without limiting to Abuja.
- Double-gamers‘’I’m waking up this morning to annoy impending drivers and ensure they tail behind me,’’ are the likely words they say to themselves with a huge smirk. This driver loves to drive between two lanes so they can easily bend to the favourable lane when need arises. No amount of honks deter this guy from spreading his car wheels between two lanes because he loves to see people riled up.
- I also call them cheats and indecisive motorists.
- Elephants/Honkers
- These are road bullies. They’ll ensure you get confused on the road, ram somehow into the vehicle before you or just fall into a ditch. They can see clearly there’s a traffic light stop or you’re held up by some factors but continue to honk into your ears incessantly as though you love to breathe in Abuja air, watch pedestrians and vehicles pass by.
- You-must-notice-my-hallogen-lights
- *sigh. Kilode, na only you waka come?
- I’m still trying to understand why drivers flash their headlamps at other drivers during day or night. These ones will almost blind you at night. To show effectiveness of their headlamps? No? To bring attention to the model of their cars? No? To overtake? Whatever happened to honking once?
- Smarty Pants
- Ah! These ones think other motorists are dumb and unnecessarily slow. They’re brothers to the Elephants. They lack patience to simply follow road instructions. They beat traffic, shont queues and prove rights over obvious road offences. Sometimes, I wish Abuja would incorporate its’ own road enforcement Agencies like LAWMA, LASTMA and the likes. Imagine being unsafe on one-way roads. As a driver, you’ll be forced to look sideways before driving into a one-way road. Yeah, that happens a lot in Abuja.
- Assumptious Amys
- NO, SISTER, I DO NOT KNOW THAT. YOUR INDICATORS ARE NOT THERE FOR FANCY! USE THEM!
- ‘’Oh! You should know without indications that I’m driving to the left’’.
- These kinds assume motorists are mind-readers. They think you’re Gaius who’s capable of foreseeing their next actions on the road. They don’t indicate their directions. They swerve and delve into the roads as they desire.
- Confused Cornels
- Some of them are frustrated from home, work etc., and transfer the frustration on you who had a great day at work, only to get you frustrated as well, then you transfer to someone else. This becomes ‘’cycle of frustration’’. This is the reason FRSC advises to leave the car if one isn’t in the good state of mind. They are closely related to the angry birds. They yell and scream on the roads at the slightest opportunity.
- You see, these ones indicate out of the goodness of their hearts. But when indicate wrongly, thereby, misleading the forthcoming vehicles. They indicate and drive the opposite direction. They indicate left but drive to the right. Common!
- Angry Birds
- Sorry, but you’re not Jesus to bow at the mention of your name. Thank you.
- They’re easily the ‘’do-you-know-who-I-am’’ drivers who at the slightest road block or car scratch, let you know their status in the society to threaten and make you shiver at the mention of names.
- This driver is the offspring of Confused Cornels. They’re naturally aggressive. Abusive words are liberal on their lips. In fact, being sane is much of a luxury to them. They own the road and see it as an inheritance from their fathers. You dare not try to drive between them because it just might land you some hot rounds of insults you never planned to have. They are drama kings and Queens who draw scenes to themselves.
- Slow and steady
- Au re voir!
- Have you been involved in any road drama? How well did you handle it? Do remember to include your classification if not encapsulated.
- Another lesson is being patient. Patient to give way to the on-coming ‘’superman’’ driver who has probably signed his death wish hours before. The most I do to them is to give some deadly stares to proof a point or mutter silly inaudible words within the confinement of my vehicle. Mans cannot afford to be waylaid on the journey home.
- Nonetheless, driving here is somewhat interesting. I get to laugh at two confused adults, who struggle to overtake each other. I have also managed to pick a few lesson from motorists. One of the lesson is the ability to control/restrain myself from dishing insults to in-cautious drivers. After all, we all have our excesses on the road.
- I hear the best way to drive is thinking you’re the only sane driver. Perhaps, if everyone had that thought, we’ll all be weary of other insane drivers and mitigate the high rates of road accidents.
- They believe slow and steady wins the race. Lewis Hamilton might probably help with that belief.
- These ones are sloths in human form. They’re not learners but are extremely slow in driving. They delay other drivers and almost cause a long trail of traffic. Why stay on the fast lane since driving is your leisure or hobby edakun?
By: Oluwaseyi Efuntoye
Email : sefuntoye@gmail.com
Instagram : @seyyi_
