self development Archives

In self development January 24, 2019 By Women of Rubies

PRINCESS SHYNGLE NARRATES HOW TOYIN ABRAHAM STOOD BY HER DURING HOSPITAL RELAPSE

Princess Shyngle has taken to Instagram page to shower praise on Nollywood actress, Toyin Abraham for standing by her side when she had a relapse.

The news of her alleged suicide attempt and hospital relapse broke the internet in November 2018.

In her IG post, she narrated how Toyin left her movie set in Ibadan to visit her in Lagos when the news broke that she was in the hospital.

“I had a relapse and got admitted last month in Lagos, this angel @toyin_abraham saw the news online left location and drove all the way from Ibadan to lekki immediately, rushed to the hospital just to see me and to make sure I was okay ❤️ toyin was literally in tears and was praying for me ❤️ @toyin_abraham I just want to say Thank you for being a big sis to me, thank you for always being there for me, thank you for guiding me, thank you for encouraging me and always putting a smile on my face ❤️❤️ I love you so much and I promise to never let you down @toyin_abraham ❤️ you’re definitely an angel sent from above to watch over me and protect me ❤️❤️ God bless you my gorgeous big sis ❤️❤️❤️ @toyin_abraham please help me thank this gorgeous angel for me Y’all ❤️❤️” she wrote.

In self development January 23, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

MEET SUNSHINE KING, BEAUTIFUL MOM WHO WAS PARALYSED BY ACCIDENT TURNED WHEELCHAIR MODEL

Sunshine King is not only a model, dancer, actor, CEO, massage therapist teacher and mother — she is a survivor of violence who accomplishes all her tasks while paralyzed in a wheelchair

After a violent incident in 2004 that King said turned her world “upside down,” she was paralyzed from the neck down and had to endure months of recovery to teach herself the most basic of movements.

Hear her story;

My name is Sunshine King and I would love to share my story. I’m a survivor of domestic violence whom became a widow, single parent, and disabled in 2004.”I had to re-learn how to sit up properly, bathe, to dress, and learn how to transfer and operate my wheelchair… just learn how to find normalcy again with this paralysis,” But she persevered, and after months of rehabilitation, she has become an inspirational example of overcoming obstacles through strength and positivity, even taking to the runway during New York Fashion Week — twice.

I’m now a survivor, wellness practitioner, fitness instructor, actress, and model. Specializing in iridology, reflexology, Reiki, Qigong, muscle relaxation techniques, aromatherapy, wellness coaching, and more. I assist people with their healthy journey from individuals, couples, families, and corporations for the past 12 years.

Having the pleasure assisting others in and out of the disability community the importance of incorporating a healthier regiment. It starts with our self-esteem, family, and friends support. We must remember that Exercising and getting out into the community is important. If we don’t have the proper balance we can easily gain more weight and fall into a dark season.

I’ve had the pleasure working with amazing people throughout the years and taking numerous workshops, school, to invest into personal growth.

I’ve had the pleasure to be the first adult wheelchair model for Tommy Hilfiger adaptive clothing line in 2017. I’ve also have the pleasure being a fit model for a few amazing designers and companies for adaptive ware too.

“We all have different disabilities, so be open-minded and try new things,” she added. “Anything out there, we can do, we just do it in adapted ways. Don’t limit yourself based on your disability. Your abilities are amazing.”

King believes in finding inner peace and happiness and “to live each day with a purpose.”

“No matter how catastrophic your life has been, you have to keep your dreams alive and stay humble. Dream big and stay awesome because your life is all you have. Live each day to the max.”

Instagram: @sunshineking01

In self development January 23, 2019 By Women of Rubies

MEET GERMAN MODEL WHO TOOK INJECTIONS FOR TWO YEARS TO TURN HERSELF INTO A BLACK WOMAN

Two years after having injections to turn her into a black woman, German model Martina Big is talking about the procedure, saying she’s changed race.

She speaks on ITV‘s This Morning, joined by her husband Michael who is also taking steps to turn his skin dark.

She believes they’ll have black kids if they procreate.

“My children will be black. We are not having plans, but I am discussing with my doctor to see if my body is okay, will I be able to breastfeed, what the baby will look like,” she said.

She said she’s travelled to a few African countries to learn the culture, adding that right now, she relates better with people of African heritage than white people.

Martina went viral in 2017 after her before and after photos surfaced the internet.

Watch:

In self development January 22, 2019 By Women of Rubies

A COLLEGE COUNSELOR TOLD MICHELLE OBAMA SHE WASN’T ‘PRINCETON UNIVERSITY MATERIAL’ — BUT SHE APPLIED TO THE SCHOOL ANYWAY AND GOT IN

When Michelle Obama was in high school, a college counselor said she didn’t think the promising teen had what it took to get into Princeton University.

The former first lady details this pivotal experience in her new memoir, ” Becoming.”

Obama says that at the beginning of her senior year at Whitney M. Young High School, a Chicago magnet school, she was required to meet with a college counselor.

At the time, she had her sights set on the New Jersey Ivy League school because her older brother Craig was there.

But she got a blow when the counselor said it didn’t appear she was good enough to get in.

“‘I’m not sure,’ she said, giving me a perfunctory, patronizing smile, “that you’re Princeton material,'” Obama recalled the woman saying.

Obama said she can’t remember details about the woman her race or her age because she “deliberately and almost instantly blotted this experience out.”

She decided to disregard the advice and apply to Princeton anyway.

“I wasn’t going to let one person’s opinion dislodge everything I thought I knew about myself,” she said.

Instead, she “settled down and got back to work.”

Six or seven months later she got her acceptance letter in the mail.

“I never did stop in on the college counselor to tell her she’d been wrongthat I was Princeton material after all. It would have done nothing for either of us,” Michelle writes in the book.

She added: “And in the end, I hadn’t needed to show her anything. I was only showing myself.”

While Princeton initially intimidated her, by her sophomore year she learned that she was just as smart as everyone else there.

“I tried not to feel intimidated when classroom conversation was dominated by male students, which it often was,” she wrote. “Hearing them, I realized that they weren’t at all smarter than the rest of us. They were simply emboldened, floating on an ancient tide of superiority, buoyed by the fact that history had never told them anything different.”

Credit: Business Insider

In self development January 22, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

GRACE ORISAKIYA: JOB SEARCH TIPS; FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL

It’s no news that the rate of unemployment has increased over the years. Fresh graduates are turned down for lack of experience, previously employed individuals are rejected due to unaccounted gap years on their CVs and other reasons. Frustration kicks in, depression might take over and lack of self belief may be the order of the day. I have been in such a nasty situation before and based on my experience I took control of what I could handle and with that, I experienced a change.

Develop your skill:

Every profession is unique and has required skill sets. Identify which is unique to your profession and develop it. Make it known on your CV and be ready to explain it when asked during the interview phase.

Take more courses:

Instead of having gap years on your CV that only proves you haven’t been in touch with your career since you left your previous job or school, taking courses especially online courses is a great method to bridge the gap and show you have been busy doing more research while searching for a job or tending to some personal needs. This won’t only prove to the employer that you have a keen interest in professional and personal development but it will enable you learn more about your industry

Network and build professional relationships:

Go for events, meet people, let people know what you do, the services you render and how you can add value to them or their company. What I have noticed is the sentence ‘I need a job’ itches the ears but starting a conversation and leading it interestingly towards what you can do and letting the listener know you are interested in starting a new position is a better approach as you’ll not only make the conversation about what you need, you also get to know what the person does, talk about your interests and have the opportunity to pitch your unique skills and application in the workplace (and maybe do a little bragging about your previous experiences).

Develop your CV:

Notice I didn’t make this the first tip? Working on your CV is great but without the right content it is considered disturbing and unprofessional. Your CV should summarize your work experiences, highlight your educational background, unique skills as related to your career, volunteering experiences (if necessary), your contact. You don’t need to fill up your CV with:

irrelevant information like your elementary school details,

in my opinion there’s no need to add your hobbies rather make it your skills,

Unaccountable years of experience,

Lies.

Your CV should be authentic, precise, professionally written and shouldn’t be too long.

Apply online:

I got my first job online via indeed. LinkedIn is another great platform to apply for jobs and network with people in your industry. Actively search online for jobs as you may not know the day you will get a response from the company.

Photocredit: The sister

About Author

Grace Asemota is a Business Psychologist (M.Sc) and a Certified Life Coach. She has partnered with Organizations and solopreneurs to grow their personal and professional brands and has coached students and staff in different institutions and organisations.

She continuously coaches and trains on the importance of goal setting, happiness,personal development and self- confidence in a wide range of organisations and institutions by motivating staff to develop a collaborative culture and identify key factors that can enhance personal growth.

You can follow her on

LinkedIn @Grace Asemota-Orisakiya

In self development January 22, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

FIRST EVER BLACK-OWNED BREAST CANCER BOUTIQUE OFFERS CUSTOM PROSTHETICS, INTIMATE WEAR, AND MORE

Cherry Blossom Intimates, a Black-owned boutique in the Washington, D.C. metro area, is the first-ever lingerie and medical custom prosthetics store for breast cancer survivors and women in general. Founded by Jasmine Jones and Dr. Regina Hampton, the store is unique because they carry a thoughtful collection of oncology products, supportive services, and intimate wear that is not typically found under one roof

Jones, a beauty queen and Miss District of Columbia USA 2016, serves as the chief operating officer for Cherry Blossom Intimates. Breast cancer survivors are close to her heart as she herself has lost her grandmother to the disease.

“I remember her having to go and shop for prosthetic pieces that didn’t properly fit and only came in one color while store employees stuffed her behind a curtain to try them on,” Jones said in an interview. “It got to the point where after a while, my grandmother just stopped wearing them all together… They didn’t fit or make her feel beautiful.”

Learning about her grandmother’s experiences is what led her to do something to help make cancer survivors feel beautiful and “to be able to do it with dignity and comfort.”

Dr. Regina Hampton, a Howard University alumna, with over 10 years in practice, one of the few breast care surgeons in Prince George’s County and one of the founders of Southeast D.C.’s Breast Care for Washington, was the one who came up with the vision. She described her collaboration with Jones in Cherry Blossom Intimates as a “dream come true.”

“Women should be able to feel empowered every day by what they have on, from outer garments to lingerie — and breast cancer survivors are no exception,” Hampton said in an interview. “I mean at our store we have shapewear, push up bras, wireless bras, lace and everything in between.”

Aside from those lingerie products, the breast care store also offers chest wall graphs that mimic natural breast for prosthetics as well as nipple coverings in different skin tones and bra sizes from AA to size Q. The store is made for everybody — from cancer survivors to young girls — and “will for the first time, allow girlfriends with or without breast cancer to laugh and shop together.”

The boutique also plans to provide medical in-house billing for all types of insurance for their products and alternative to those without appropriate coverage.

“Being able to help other people is so important and it makes you feel so good,” Hampton said. “I just want to show women that they are all beautiful no matter the package and make them believe it.”

Source: Black Business

In self development January 21, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

DOROTHY ODHIAMBO: WOMEN AND LEADERSHIP

When I talk about women and leadership, I refer to the Ellen Johnsons of yesterday, today and
tomorrow. I refer to Sahle –Work Zewde, I refer to Ilhan Omar, I refer to Michelle Obama and
last but not least! So close to home! Kenyan first female major General Fatuma Ahmed
Gaiti.This women have broken glass ceilings that most thought were impossible goals for
women to achieve.

They didn’t do it overnight that’s for sure but the courage, the perseverance, the name calling
and shaming they must have endured during their rise to success must have been alot.Some of
them are still in the game and some are out of it but not completely out of it.This brings me to
my main reason of putting it down in writing. My main question is, have women been fully
accepted as worthy opponents for their male counterparts in different professional fields? I
don’t want to come out sounding like us women are crying over our seat at the table. At this
point and time, we are not crying or being nice to get what we deserve and have earned but we
are asking for our seat at the table, that which we have worked for.

I know that last sentence in that last paragraph might follow up with sneers from some people
but hey, it’s time people, not only women but also men stood up for what they believe they
have rightfully achieved. Recently when I was having a bit of a discussion with my colleagues on
women in power and their journey to where they are right now, made me realize that men are
still not ready for women in power. Saying it as it is. I can’t blame one of my colleagues for his
ignorance because the society that we are brought up in and that which we are living in right
now, has portrayed the girl child mostly as someone who seeks favors from men because of
their gender.

The perception that people have when a woman is in power is different from that which they
have when a man is in the same position. Quoting Rita Kavashe, Isuzu East Africa MD,who says
she was being mistaken at first for being the MD’s secretary and not the MD during her first
days as Isuzu MD, goes a long way to clearly bring out the fact that people still don’t consider
women as ‘worthy’ of some positions as they do men. The only thing that some people can
think of when they see women making it professionally is that they got there through shrewd
means .This not only disrespects those women who have earned their place at the table
through their own sweat, but it also demoralizes our women!

Its’s time we start bringing up the young generation with better values and ideologies. It’s time
we strengthened both sexes for them to know that claiming what they have worked so hard for
is not a crime neither is it a favor. Women should not cower in fear of people’s perception of
their limits. Be limitless; strive to concur what you set your heart in. As Oprah puts it, ‘Be the
one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only
people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment, own
it.

About Dorothy

She is currently a front desk agent/cashier at Acacia Premier Hotel Kisumu .Passionate about writing articles that has direct impact on women. She is 24 years old,determined to empower fellow women and just shed light on different relevant issues.You can contact her via her email address ; odhiamboodorothy1@gmail.com.

In self development January 21, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

JANE UDOKA: THE IDEAL WOMAN: THE IDEAL SERIES

All over the world, there are diverse ways an ideal woman is looked upon. Some countries or tribes judge this based on the ethnicity, the looks, the moral disposition, social nature of a woman. Some however even judge this idealism based on trivial things such as her body size, her feminine curves, her sensuality, her height, accent or even the way she walks. It’s funny and inconsequential but the world has placed insanely high standards on women that some find it quite hard to come to terms and be happy with whom they are.

To us however, these are the standards by which an ideal woman should be measured :

An Ideal woman is an independent woman, she is a woman who is capable of taking care of her emotions, her duties, herself and people who depend on her. She is someone who does not manipulate people around her to do her wishes but instead takes the bull heads on and achieves the task needed. She is a goal getter, a trend setter and one who does not shy away from duties no matter the sexual barriers that are attached to it. She is one that’s able to put sentiments aside and forge ahead with the right things.

An Ideal woman is a purposeful and creative lady, she is a lady with a purpose. She is a career oriented woman with set goals. She is one who sleeps at night and wakes up with a refreshed and energized spirit to fight for her dreams. She is one who does not conform to the world’s standards for good, but seeks to become better with each passing day.

The Ideal woman is a motivator and helper to people around her. She is one who motivates and encourages people around her. If she is in a relationship, or married, she is one who’s not just there in favorable times but even in the gloomy days. She is one who understands and is ready to help whenever and however she can. She is a loyal woman.

Our ideal woman is one who understands that her worth isn’t just defined by her sex. If she is married she is one who knows that motherhood isn’t her totality but also an added role she plays. She is one who focuses on being the best mother and also the career woman she is. She is one who does not accept the people’s definition of a good woman but goes ahead to create her own version of it.

Our Ideal woman is the confident lady. She is one who is extremely comfortable in her own skin. She is one who is not intimidated by what the world throws at her but takes it and makes the best out of it. She is one who is not deterred by her failures but rather sees it as a chance to becoming better. She is one who revels in her capabilities and pulls up those all around her . She is the hard working woman.

Photocredit: Google

About Jane

21 year old Udoka Jane O is a trained Engineer, She is a professional freelance writer on Relationship and healthy lifestyles. Jane has written a number of mind engaging articles….

In self development January 21, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HISTORY, HARVARD HAS FOUR BLACK WOMEN FACULTY DEANS

Beginning August 15 2018, Harvard University now have four its schools led by Black women, which is the first time in the Ivy League institution’s history, reports The Harvard Crimson.

Last year, Professor Claudine Gay became the latest string of Black women to be appointed to dean positions at the university. Her role as dean of the Faculty of Arts and Sciences will make her the first woman and first African American to hold that position. In an interview following the announcement, Gay said she hopes her new promotion will inspire other women and people of color, similar to how former University President Drew G. Faust inspired her as Harvard’s first female president.

“If my presence in this role affirms someone’s sense of belonging and ownership, the same way Drew’s appointment affirmed my sense of belonging, then I think that’s great,” said Gay. “And for people who are sort of beyond our gates, if this prompts them to look again and look anew at Harvard and imagine new possibilities for themselves, I think that’s great as well.”

In 2016, Michelle Williams became the first Black person to head a faculty at Harvard, and the first Black woman to lead the Longwood-based School of Public Health. In May and April, Tomiko Brown-Nagin and Bridget Terry-Long became the first African American women deans at the Radcliffe Institute for Advance Study and the Graduate School of Education, respectively.

Before their appointments, Evelynn Hammonds served as the first female and African American dean for the History of Science school for five years until 2013.

John S. Wilson, a senior advisor and strategist on Harvard University’s diversity and inclusion initiatives, calls these recent dean appointments “significant” considering Harvard has long been known as a predominately white institution.

“To now be moving into a phase of Harvard’s life where people who don’t meet that profile are now empowered to advance Harvard, it just signals that Harvard is getting ready for a new future for itself and for the country and for the world,” he said.

In self development January 21, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

NEW RESEARCH SAYS SEMEN MAY ACTUALLY TREAT DEPRESSION IN WOMEN

In a recent study conducted at the University of Albany, a psychology professor and his team found that the absorption of semen by the female body correlates with fewer symptoms of depression.

The team conducted anonymous surveys of 300 female students.

Each participant completed a survey about her intimate activities including frequency of intercourse, last intercourse, and how regularly the participant uses condoms. Participants also completed the Beck Depression Inventory.

The Beck Depression Inventory, or BDI, presents a person with 21 questions that gauge their level of depressive symptoms including:

mood

negative outlook

feelings of guilt

self-dislike

social withdrawal

difficulty functioning

Responders rate each question as it applies to them. The rating scale per question ranges from zero to three, three being the most intense experience of the symptom.

The total score can be as high as 63, higher scores again correlating to more severe depression. When the team compared participants’ BDI scores to their intimacy habits, answers about condom use stood out.

According to lead author Gordon Gallup, women who never used condoms in penetration scenarios showed significantly lower scores on the Beck Depression Inventory (BDI) than their peers who always or usually had their partners wear protection.

In developing this conclusion, the team made a point of adjusting for potentially relevant variables such as: relationship status use of other contraceptive strategies frequency of partner intimacy.

Among all variables, condom use correlated with the most clinically significant difference in participants’ BDI scores.

ALSO READ: Why Nigerians are the most depressed in Africa

The research team believes that the correlation between condom use and depressive symptoms may result from the interaction of biological material.

Gallup theorizes that upon penetration, the female partner’s internal tissues absorb some of the fluids that the male partner produces.

It is possible, the team suggests, that a woman’s mood and feeling state may change in response to this absorption.

The study’s sample size is relatively small and there are a number of unanswered questions surrounding the results.

Still, Gallup and his colleagues believe that the connection between improved mood non-use of condoms warrants further investigation.

The team cautions women and their partners not to take these findings as a motivation or an excuse not to use condoms.

Gallup has issued a statement to remind the public that protection from infectious diseases and the prevention of pregnancy should take precedence over an attempt to make use of these findings.

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Source: Higher Perspective

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