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We Worked Together For 3 Months and I never Noticed Him, Read Yaw and Esi Beautiful Love Story

The adorable couple won our hearts with the beautiful love story. They have lived in the same company for 3 months without noticing each other.

The bride-to-be, Esi never thought her work colleague will turn out to be the man she would spend forever with.

After Yaw walking to her office one day, they kept in touch and now they sweethearts ready to walk down the aisle.

Esi shares her love story:

My soon to be husband had been in the company I work with for over 3 months without me noticing him, not even once.

On this faithful Wednesday evening after work, our eyes locked as he drove pass by me with another colleague while I was waiting for my Uber. There was a mutual attraction there and then.

Yaw walked to my office the following day and offered to drop me home after work which I refused and as relentless as he can be, he kept insisting. I was left with no choice than to join him and this evening droppings became our daily routine. That’s where our little gossips and inquisitiveness started from, we would chat and still have something to talk about when we met.

Somewhere late 2019, he asked me out and I turned him down but he kept pursuing me. I later told him to give me some time to pray about it, yep. And this was exactly his words “You can have all the time you need to pray; I’ll be here waiting”. After about a month, I agreed to get to know him better.

Fast forward in 2020, we started dating with the intentions of getting married soon, little did I know that my son was just around the corner. My husband to be asked me to marry him a day just after my birthday at my surprise birthday party. I had a double portion of surprises, and I couldn’t have said no to this big YES!

Check photos below:

EsiEsi

Yaw proposes to EsiYaw proposes to Esi

Yaw proposes to Esi Yaw proposes to Esi

Esi and YawEsi and Yaw

Esi and YawEsi and Yaw
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4 Top Foods For Increasing Breast Size Naturally

The breast can be improved on/increased just by eating these foods making the growth as natural as possible…

The breasts can be made bigger using natural and artificial means (for ladies who prefer to go a size/cup bigger).

A lot of ladies (with small breasts) would love their breasts fuller, rounder and with ample cleavage to show off in some outfit styles!

Using artificial ways including enlargement drugs, lotions and cosmetic surgery usually come with side effects making the natural way through specific exercises and foods the better preferred way to grow the mammary glands.

Here are 5 foods that make your breasts bigger naturally

1. Seafood

Seafood contain Manganese that studies show increase sex hormones that helps with breast growth so including seafood like mussels, prawns, shrimps and even fish amongst others helps the breasts grow naturally.

2. Dairy foods like milk, cheese

They contain natural hormones that are stimulants responsible for developing the female breasts and if you desire fuller bosom then diary foods are best consumed well alongside normal diet to help fill up the area naturally.

Include foods like cheese, butter, yoghurt and milk in your diet increase in breast size.

3. Nuts

Nuts have been fingered as ones to stimulate breast growth. If you want bigger breasts double up on eating seeds and nuts to help stimulate the glands in the area for bigger results.

Nuts as cashew, walnut, sesame and flax seeds are ones to consume for bigger breasts.

Also Read: How to leave a toxic relationship

4. Whole grains

Whole grains are packed full with nutrients that are healthy as well as ones to stimulate the breasts to go bigger. Whole wheat and brown rice should be included in diets for bigger breasts.

5. Vegetables

Leafy greens are also foods to load up on for increased breast size. The upside is they come healthy too so why not?

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This Bride Wore A White Trouser Suit On Her Wedding Day And It’s Beautiful (See Photos)

The absolutely gorgeous bride rocked her stunning trouser suit wedding outfit with class.

Arklean
Arklean

Creativity runs in every woman’s vein and we always have to appear stunning.

Everybody including the groom can’t wait to see the apparel his wife-to-be would wear for their holy matrimony.

Emma and his girlfriend, Arklean got married recently in Uganda. They decided to break the usual fashion game at weddings this time.

The bride looked gorgeous in her fairytale Cinderella gown that had a trail and beautiful lace. She accompanied her look with flawless makeup and beautiful hair making her look like a real princess.

The groom, Emma, looked dapper in his royal blue suit combo and elegant pair of shoes.

After the church wedding, Arklean slid into a sleek three-piece suit made of an embroidered crop top, a coat that had a plunging neckline and a pair of fitting pants for the wedding reception.

It was truly a beautiful celebration for the couple and their guests. Pulse.com.gh wishes the couple a lifetime of bliss, love and laughter.

Check photos below:

ArkleanArklean

ArkleanArklean

Arklean and her bridesmaidArklean and her bridesmaid

Emma and ArkleanEmma and Arklean

Emma and ArkleanEmma and Arklean

Emma and ArkleanEmma and Arklean

Emma and ArkleanEmma and Arklean

Arklean and bridesmaids Arklean and bridesmaids
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In Career Gems By

Meghan Markle Share Heartbreaking Miscarriage Experience

Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, in a moving Op-Ed written for the New York Times, she revealed she suffered a miscarriage in July this year, opening up about the deep grief and loss she endured with her husband Prince Harry.

She said: “Losing a child means carrying an almost unbearable grief, experienced by many but talked about by few.” In the article, she describes feeling a sharp pain while she was holding son, Archie.

She wrote:

I felt a sharp cramp. I dropped to the floor with him in my arms, humming a lullaby to keep us both calm, the cheerful tune a stark contrast to my sense that something was not right. I knew, as I clutched my firstborn child, that I was losing my second.

Hours later, I lay in a hospital bed, holding my husband’s hand. I felt the clamminess of his palm and kissed his knuckles, wet from both our tears. Staring at the cold white walls, my eyes glazed over. I tried to imagine how we’d heal.

Recalling the royal visit she and Harry made in September 2019 to South Africa, she wrote:

I recalled a moment last year when Harry and I were finishing up a long tour in South Africa. I was exhausted. I was breastfeeding our infant son, and I was trying to keep a brave face in the very public eye.

‘Are you OK?’ a journalist asked me. I answered him honestly, not knowing that what I said would resonate with so many — new moms and older ones, and anyone who had, in their own way, been silently suffering. My off-the-cuff reply seemed to give people permission to speak their truth. But it wasn’t responding honestly that helped me most, it was the question itself.

‘Thank you for asking,’ I said. ‘Not many people have asked if I’m OK.’

She writes:

I answered him honestly, not knowing that what I said would resonate with so many — new moms and older ones, and anyone who had, in their own way, been silently suffering. My off-the-cuff reply seemed to give people permission to speak their truth. But it wasn’t responding honestly that helped me most, it was the question itself.

Meghan says she was sitting in a hospital bed watching her “husband’s heartbreak” when she realised that the only way to heal was to ask herself “Are you OK?”.

In her article, the Duchess of Sussex reflects on how it was heartbreaking to learn just how many women suffer from miscarriages and yet the conversation remains “taboo, riddled with (unwarranted shame)” and “perpetuates a cycle of solitary mourning”.

In the pain of our loss, my husband and I discovered that in a room of 100 women, 10 to 20 of them will have suffered from a miscarriage. Yet despite the staggering commonality of this pain, the conversation remains taboo, riddled with (unwarranted) shame, and perpetuating a cycle of solitary mourning.

Some have bravely shared their stories; they have opened the door, knowing that when one person speaks the truth, it gives license for all of us to do the same.

She describes 2020, as a year of breaking points for the world, the global COVID-19 deaths, social isolation of lockdown and the Black Lives Matter protests sparked by the deaths of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor and many other in the United States.

A young woman named Breonna Taylor goes to sleep, just as she’s done every night before, but she doesn’t live to see the morning because a police raid turns horribly wrong. George Floyd leaves a convenience store, not realizing he will take his last breath under the weight of someone’s knee, and in his final moments, calls out for his mom. Peaceful protests become violent. Health rapidly shifts to sickness. In places where there was once a community, there is now a division.

On top of all of this, it seems we no longer agree on what is true. We aren’t just fighting over our opinions of facts; we are polarized over whether the fact is, in fact, a fact. We are at odds over whether science is real. We are at odds over whether an election has been won or lost. We are at odds over the value of compromise.

That polarization, coupled with the social isolation required to fight this pandemic, has left us feeling more alone than ever.

In the final part of the article, Meghan encourages people to ask: ‘Are you OK?’, saying that she believes that the ‘load of grief often becomes lighter’ when talked about.

In being invited to share our pain, together we take the first steps toward healing.

As much as we may disagree, as physically distanced as we may be, the truth is that we are more connected than ever because of all we have individually and collectively endured this year.

We are adjusting to a new normal where faces are concealed by masks, but it’s forcing us to look into one another’s eyes — sometimes filled with warmth, other times with tears. For the first time, in a long time, as human beings, we are really seeing one another

The article ends with: ‘Are we OK? We will be’.

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Olabisi Animashaun: Driving Is An Acquired Skill, And Shouldn’t Be Gender-Biased

I was having a rough morning that Tuesday. I had grudgingly uprooted myself from my damp mattress, no thanks to Lagos consistent power failure. I had spent the previous tossing and turning, that is, after taking a shower for the third time before I finally surrendered to sleep. I had awoken with a strong headache and a sense of uncertainty, what would the day bring? How would my day at my 9–5 job be? The past few months had not been exactly friendly either but I digress…

While ruminating on these things, I found myself swerving to the left, almost landing on a fellow passenger’s laps. And then again, right, almost falling off the moving bus if not saved by the conductor’s swift intervention. From my seat in the second row by the edge of the bus, I saw the driver’s lips move profusely uttering not-so-quiet curses. On my right, the conductor backs him up by uttering some curses of his own. While trying to settle, I sighted a jeep in front, still trying to find its balance.

Now out of my reverie, I caught the driver pointing five fingers at the other driver whose face was still hidden by his tinted window glasses. The driver muttered something about “how women want to do everything. If dem no sabi drive shebi dem go carry moto commot for road”. Beside me, again I hear the conductor say “dem no dey hear that one, if you talk now dem…” he was cut halfway by another almost hit, a result of the other driver’s bad judgment.

Now properly vexed, the conductor hits the side of the jeep and yelled: “Madam e yi wo yin so wun na (Madam, turn your steering to the other side). Ti e ba mo motor wa e sha joko sile! (Sit at home if you can’t drive!)”. I jokingly asked the conductor what made him think it was a woman driving if he hadn’t even confirmed it. “Na who else go dey drive slowly and jagajaga like learner if no be woman. Una dey drive like say you dey fear the steering” was his response.

To be honest, I wasn’t even shocked by his response. I mean, I’ve been hearing that from male drivers over the years, but that morning, I wasn’t just having it. “What do you mean women don’t know how to drive? What has driving got to do with gender? It is a skill that can be acquired by anyone of legal age!” I heard a man behind shout “Dem no dey hear! Na so so defend dem go dey defend themselves”, this caused laughter to erupt from other men and some women. I didn’t let them deter me from schooling them, “Over the years, I’m sure we’ve all seen how ‘well’ men have ‘handled’ the steering”. “Aunty no dey talk like that, even blind person go know say that woman dey drive that car…” It was the bus driver this time, but before he could complete his sentence, the jeep driver had hit a Korope (small bus) in front and a fight about to ensue.

Realizing their mistake, the driver of the jeep steps down from his car only to reveal… a MAN. I couldn’t help it, ladies and gentlemen, I burst into well-deserved laughter. The driver must be worse than a blind person then (no offense meant to the blind). “So na man dey drive that kain way?” the conductor asked. “E be like say na him wife teach am how to drive” the man behind responded. “Maybe woman dey beside am dey distract am” another man said. Really? I wasn’t having it “How about the fact that you people would rather make excuses to justify your claims rather than accepting you were wrong?” I was met with grave silence.

I turned to the conductor, “Between man and woman driver, which one plenty pass for Lagos?” a long pause, then, “That one go hard o. How I wan take know that one?” was his response, while he scratched the side of his head. I saw he had already figured what I was driving at so he wasn’t going to make it easy for me. I wasn’t going to be deterred either. Like I mentioned earlier, I had had enough of the sexist thing. “Let me help you, it’s actually easy you see. We do not need a calculator or an official statistic to reach an answer. Let’s begin this way; how many females are Danfo drivers? How about BRTs, Trailers, Koropes, and Keke Napeps? Let’s not forget motorcycles, private cars used for Bolt, Uber and other services, and even truck pushers. How many women drive their personal cars? Even if the equation is almost balanced in the case of personal cars, we cannot excuse other vehicle owners/users who are majorly men” the silence is even graver now.

“My point is if the majority of the road users are men (at least in Lagos) and we all can testify to the state of traffic in Lagos, where and how did we get the idea that women are poor drivers? The real problem is that we have been programmed to base almost everything on gender, including acquiring skills. A woman will be judged for not knowing how to cook while the man is spared because he is a man. If indeed men are better drivers then we shouldn’t be having as many road accidents as we do, neither should be spending long hours in traffic if the men were truly experts in the field”.

At this point, I was almost reaching my bus stop so I quickly added, “It is not our fault that we grew up learning these things, but if we don’t take responsibility and unlearn them, we would be wrong for passing down these archaic and toxic ideologies to our children and the younger generation. Let’s be open-minded, when we hear a thing, question it beyond all reasonable doubts, weigh it from all angles, else who would be living in the 1800s while in 2020. I hope the next time someone drives poorly, you do not jump to a conclusion. Remind yourself that driving is a skill that is acquired by both genders.

“Aunty lawyer, oya o we don reach your bus stop! I suppose leave the money for you but you too get sharp mouth. Thank you sha, now wey you explain am like that, I agree small. We go dey try small small”. I alighted from the bus somewhat fulfilled. To think I started out moody and filled with uncertainty, that experience was the highlight of my day. I was able to reorientate at least fourteen people; hopefully, they were convinced and will pass it on. One life at a time, they say, till we change the world.

 

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Damilola Ogunrinde: Sex, Condoms and Nigerian Men

A few weeks ago, I asked Tamara of the Yellow Wall what her thoughts were on sex. She told me that one of her deep concerns for young Nigerian women was that a lot of men hate using condoms.

It is a well-known fact that men often refuse to use condoms in casual, polygamous, or long-term relationships. So when I had a discussion with Dr. Pepple of Pepple’s Hub on another episode of Taboo Doctor, I asked him why men hate condoms.​ His answer was simple: it doesn’t feel the same. He, however, encouraged men to use condoms for the following reasons.

Sustained sexual pleasure

Due to the nature of premature ejaculation, condoms can prolong the time it takes before climax is reached, thereby leading to a more satisfying sexual experience and a happier partner. It will also give a whole new meaning to ‘no glove no love.’

Do not wait until you have STI symptoms to get tested

Symptoms of sexually transmitted infections for men include burning, pain, ulcers, and itching, however, waiting until symptoms begin to show may be too late especially if one is sexually active with multiple partners. Dr. Pepple encouraged young men to not only have condoms handy but also to make it a commonplace practice to seek out health screening and ensure they know what their status is for HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and even syphilis. Read more about STIs.

Religion vs Sensuality

During our conversation, Dr. Pepple recalled an incident in his final year of medical school when a professor of gynaecology left a young lady with more questions than answers after she had come to him seeking advice regarding anal intercourse. Upon her exit, the professor had informed him that he believed evil spirits possessed her. Our culture and religion have developed social constructs that interfere with how we experience sex in relationships. As a result, we are less likely to have open and honest conversations about our sexual concerns and difficulties.

Fear of the unknown

Because we live in a society that is judgemental and almost hypocritical about sexual issues, many men are less likely to seek out help, even from qualified medical professionals. Many end up keeping it to themselves when they have symptoms and such delays could lead to infections which could, in turn, lead to pelvic inflammatory disease and infertility.

Getting an STI screen in a long-term relationship

A few years ago, I asked you if you trusted your partner’s partners and highlighted why screening was necessary. If you have any concerns, doubts or worries, get screened and talk to your partner about it. Your health matters and it is your responsibility to seek out the help that you need.

The conversation with Dr. Pepple was insightful and revelatory, and it exposed the concerns which men often have but are less likely to discuss due to the rules of engagement that society has constructed.

What do you think? As a man, do you feel more likely to seek out medical attention to assess your sexual health? As a woman, are you tired of cajoling your man to see a doctor?

Men, what do you think about the fear of vasectomy, is it a valid concern? Keep your eyes peeled for the vasectomy episode which comes out in two weeks. Make sure you subscribe so you do not miss out when it drops.

Source: Bellanaija

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In Career Gems By

Meet The 26-Year-Old Who Became A Rocket Scientist After She Was Enrolled In An Honors Math Class By Mistake

She’s one of the dopest engineers NASA’s seen thus far!

Dajae Williams is an accidental engineer. Her freshman year at Kirkwood High School in Missouri a teacher enrolled her in honors geometry by mistake, and that changed her life. Now, the 26-year-old is working at NASA as a rocket scientist and traveling the country speaking to young people about math and science using music. 

“Sometimes I still have to pinch myself,” she told reporters. “It’s always an exhilarating experience being around so many smart people, just being present, and taking it all in because there is so much to learn.” 

The native of St. Louis now lives in Los Angeles where she is a quality engineer at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Lab, which was made possible by the company’s Early Career Initiative program. She is one of the few Black people and one of the youngest to work at the research facility. 

“Look, there are some pretty dope people that I work with across all of the NASA campuses, but I’m pretty sure that I’m the dopest,” Williams told St. Louis Public Radio.

She’s not kidding, she’s been able to translate difficult math and science theories into easy to remember, and catchy, hip-hop songs. Teachers, students, and even her coworkers, have become enamored with her tunes. Recently, Williams was selected as a keynote speaker to share her story with the Science Teachers Association of Texas. She discussed how difficult it was growing up as one of the few Black people in a school district and how the lack of cultural awareness caused disconnect between her and her teachers. 

“Sometimes education can be, at least in math and science, it can be a very traumatic experience…especially for kids of color. We’re not necessarily taught in the language that we learned growing up,” she explained to St. Louis Public Radio as to why she enjoys working with children. “Your teachers don’t look like you, they don’t understand where you’re coming from. So I’ve seen some pretty traumatic things, and I also have experienced some trauma myself in education, so to see the kids dancing and laughing when it comes to education…that is honestly what brings me joy.”

She began using music to help her in class in high school.  Then went on to perfect her raps while studying at Missouri University of Science and Technology in Rolla where she was studying engineering management with an emphasis in industrial engineering. There she took Soulja Boy Tell’em’s popular “Crank That” beat and added lyrics on how to solve the quadratic equation, which went viral on social media.

Williams’ first love was music, she wanted to be a producer, but after seeing how well she did in math while in high school her mom encouraged her to try the STEM field due to its lack of gender and racial representation. 

“My mom convinced me to go into a STEM field,” she said. “She saw that I was getting good at math and science, so she was like, ‘Why don’t you explore this. There’s not a lot of women. There’s not a lot of black people in this field. See what you can do. See if you can make a change.’”

Her mothers motivation worked out for her in the end because now she’s able to use both her passions to make a difference. She worked on the team that helped build the ground support equipment for Sentinel-6, which is the first in a series of spacecraft that launched this past weekend to monitor our oceans. Now that she’s reached one of her dreams she pushes others to reach for the moon because they just may land in the stars.

“Put yourself out there. Apply for things that you don’t think you qualify for. Take classes that you don’t think you’re smart enough for. It will take you further than you realize.”

Source: Becauseofthemwecan.com

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My Inspiration Is The Holy Spirit & My Personal Experience- Robinson Maggie Ihuaku

Lamp woman, Robinson Maggie Ihuaku is an Entrepreneur and a Digital sales expert. Her entrepreneurial journey started in her university days where she sold corporate shirts.

She is a Sales coach (popularly known as the millionaire ($) salesgirl) with expertise in  Developing winning sales strategy ,creating a converting Sales & landing page , Copywriting & writing winning sales pitch .

Her mission is to reduce the early death of businesses in Africa by helping them  break sales limit & create a predictable revenue for their business so they can meet their financial goal & also by  training the best digital salesmen in Africa through her startup “iré” to help businesses grow.

She is has trained 1000+ entrepreneurs on digital skills & sales & impacted many lives through her trainings & books. She is also a youth development and mental health Advocate. She uses my voice and resources to train young persons in personal development and entrepreneurship. She also have a support group @the wholeness center that helps young persons handle emotional issues like depression, suicide Etc.
Maggie is a graduate of microbiology and a certified digital marketer. She has worked with influencers on different projects. She is an Ighub fellow , a proud volunteer, a Speaker and a trainer.

She share her story in this inspiring interview with Women of Rubies.

Childhood Influence

I started my entrepreneurship journey in secondary school but officially at the age of 19. My Dad is a lecturer at abia state polytechnic & my mum is a medical social worker at abia state university teaching hospital.When I was young ,I read my dad’s text book on entrepreneurship & business because he is a PhD holder in business administration. During the holiday , I follow my mum to her work place . She told me about the cases she had at work and how she handled it . These two things gave me a foundation in business , coaching & advocacy.

Inspiration behind the Lamp Woman

The name Lamp woman was inspired from the scripture , Matt 5 vs14 & 15 where it talked about us being the light of the world. Just as the name implies, it’s means a woman who radiates light . A woman who  lightens up a place that is dark . And that is what I stand for.

The Journey So Far

The journey has being filled with so many ups and downs but I thank God. After my first business failed , I went through depression & bankruptcy. I almost committed suicide. I was depressed for 6 months . But the Lord rescued me . I had friends who were praying for me & encouraging me . Right now ,everything is slowly failing in place. That experience helped me gain clarity of purpose of what I really wanted . I mean who would believe that A broke 22 years lady hits 5 figures under 5 months .

Being a sales expertise, youth development advocate and navigating different sectors successfully

 I feel so so  good .  You know that feeling you get when you do the things that gives you Joy. I love teaching sales & business. It’s something that gives me joy to see businesses grow. I also love talking to young persons like me especially in areas of mental health (since I’m a survivor) & personal development. For the mental health support group , we have mental health expertise we work with . This makes the work very easy .Navigating these different sectors has being easy for me based on the fact that they all originated from personal experience.

Inspiration behind the wholesome center

My inspiration is the holy spirit & my personal experience. I have being a victim of rejection & depression.I was expelled from secondary school in class 2 (Js 2) just because my dad pushed our matron down with anger .They didn’t just expel me ,They brought me out in front of the whole school & gave me the disgrace of my life .The same  experience almost happened to me at my second secondary school. This incident and many others I can’t talk about gave my heart a crack. While growing up , I believed that I was not good & that people wouldn’t like me ( I still have those feelings even though I have learnt how to handle it). That’s why I still away from people. But the lord is helping me deal with all the pain & feelings . Last year, I got an instruction to start a support group for people passing through the same thing passing through & here we are.

Challenges of bein a social entrepreneur

Funding : we need funding to organize events

Partnership : partnering with experts is not really easy. As a new foundation most of them have their reservations working with us.

Other Projects

I have other projects that are still on the pipeline

1. Iré: Iré is a virtual school that trains result driven sales professionals . We will be launching very soon .

2. Project B &B: it’s an initiative where we move to communities in Africa that and help them harness available resources so they can make money . We also offer them entrepreneurship & sales training .

And some other projects that I can’t take about.

Success story from my work that inspire me

One of my success story is how I was able to move from a broke lady to 5 figures under 5 months. For me it was a big feat. After I lost everything , I started working with in my mum’s poultry farm where she paid me 500 naira just for recharge card. Before then , I already acquired a skill in copywriting . I decided to use my skills to make money. I used that 500 naira to buy data . I sent different sales pitch to different individuals & companies. Luckily , I got a job as a copywriter. That was how I started.

Women who inspire me to be better and why

1. Nwanyiakamu – Mrs ijeoma ndukwe  : I love this woman from the buttom of my heart. The way she took a local product & made it global amazes me.

2. Ibunkun awosika :I love the way she loves God & her business sense. She is my role model because I dream of seating of different board of different companies like her.

3. Ngozi okonji iweala : One word for her is Excellence . This woman is a big inspiration. This is a shining light & I love her. I love her simplicity & her wealth of knowledge.

Being a Woman of Rubies

What makes Maggie a woman of rubies is that I’m a fighter. I have had ugly experiences while growing up but I always fight for what I want . I am very tenacious & persistent. It’s my trademark.

The Nigerian  awareness on issues centered around mental health and youth advocacy

I appreciate works done by some foundations like live your dream , manifest network ,vision alive , shecanwrite  & other organizations. But I think more work needs to be done. A nation is not wealth because of money or other material possession but the human capital she has . It’s only a healthy man that would see the need to develop his or her self. A lot of work is done on youth development but we need more work on mental health .Many young persons are going through a lot . Many have given up on life .

Beyond organizing events , young persons need one on one counseling sessions where they can pour out their hearts.

Follow her on Instagram @maggieflow_
Linkedin@Robinson ihuaku Maggie

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In Editor's Choice By

“I Feel Honoured To Be Awarded The Commander Of The British Empire”- Tessy Ojo

Tessy Ojo is  a multi-award-winning social change advocate, philanthropist, civil society leader, brand ambassador, wife, mother and Chief Executive Officer of The Diana Award, a charity foundation instituted in honour of the Late Lady Diana, the Princess of Wales. At the heart of her work is the belief that, with the right support and investment, young people are the best instigators for achieving real, sustainable change in their lives and communities.

Tessy was recently awarded the Commander of the British Empire (CBE), the biggest national honour in the United Kingdom in recognition of her immense contributions towards empowering and supporting children and young people in the UK.

The  British-Nigerian national who is an inspirational speaker and regular consultant and
commentator on issues around youth participation, charity growth, diversity, women in
leadership and other social issues affecting young people, grows her kitty that already has
other eminent awards including The Precious Award, Inspiring Leader 2015, Women in Business Rising Star 2015 (London Region), Excellence Award from Eva Longoria’s Global Gift

Tessy share her inspiring journey with Esther  Ijewere in this Inspiring Interview.

Childhood Infleunce

Growing up, my parents taught us the value of leadership without a title. It was the principle of ‘if you see something that needed doing, just do it, without waiting on someone else to fix it’. This was pretty much the principle that underpinned my childhood. When you have a diplomat father and a mother who is a headteacher, you’re often drafted in to support one cause or the other, especially through their networks such as The Rotary Club etc. Generally, giving back in any capacity was the norm in our household. I remember at the age of 14, my Mum drafted me in to lead on various children’s clubs in her school. I was running a reading club, dancing club, all afterschool, so being a leader was very much a part of my upbringing.

What Inspired me to work at  The Diana Award

When the Princess of Wales was tragically killed in a car crash in 1997, it was a defining moment in my life as like thousands of others, I placed a note with words of condolence alongside flowers to honour the Princess at Kensington Palace. That note, simply said ‘You rocked my world, I will honour yours too’.

Just two years later, at the time a very successful executive, I had my youngest child and an eureka moment when I realised the vulnerability of childhood and how as a committed mother, I would always champion my children, yet not every child had a champion or an advocate.

That moment was a defining and life changing moment as I made a commitment to devote the rest of my career to advocating and championing young people, building young people’s capacity for leadership and creating social equity that ensures young people can overcome the disadvantage of birth.

A few weeks later, I responded to an ad in the newspaper to help set up a new youth charity being formed. Unaware, at the time, that this was the beginning of The Diana Award, the only charity across the world set up to continue the legacy of Diana, Princess of Wales. I responded to this ad as it was very much in line with my passion.

More about my journey is in a book that I am writing, which will be published next year.

The Journey and It’s impact in Britain

 Twenty years on and with over 100,000 young people who have been supported through this charity, through our three core programmes; many of whom are young leaders across nations, the charity has grown from strength to strength, through a combination of strategic clarity and innovative approaches.

Having said that, our world is changing rapidly with the current Covid-19 pandemic which means that there are significant societal and environmental challenges ahead. It is incredibly important that as we rebuild our communities across the world that young people are at the centre of that work, as they are the long term victims of covid and they must be empowered to help shape the future. I was particularly proud to see the participation and leadership of young people during the #EndSars protest! For us at The Diana Award, we have always believed that young people can change their world, with the right support and we remain committed to building the capacity of young people to be at the heart of this rebuilding work.

Being awarded the commander of the British Empire Award

It was and remains an incredible honour. Twenty years ago when I gave up a promising career and a lucrative pay to join the third sector, it was completely out of the need for service. Twenty years on, to receive the highest honour from Her Majesty, The Queen is just mind blowing!

Your work cuts across Anti-Bullying, mentoring and capacity building, any plan to bring your work to Nigeria?

 You know what, we would love to! With the right level of investment and sponsorship, we would love to do much more across the Commonwealth and of course Nigeria, given my connections to the country! Just find me the right sponsor and we can talk!!

Other projects and activities

You know what, I am involved in so much across the charity sector; I am on the board of Comic Relief and we are making some incredible moves about how we support global communities build capacity. I am also the co-chair of the #iwill Leadership Board, which is a board of funders who are committed to ensuring young people are supported to create the change they want to see.

More about my work will also be in my new book so look out for it!

 Challenges of my work

Pushing for change is never easy. No one likes change, yet it is inevitable. The biggest challenge is always educating on the ‘why’. The other challenge is ensuring that we are well resourced to create the change we are advocating for. Resourcing a charity is a huge challenge but it is one that is so desperately needed. A recent stats in the UK showed that young people are more reliant on the support provided by the youth sector than ever before, yet the sector has less resources than ever before! That is the challenge.

3 women who inspire me to be better and why

  • Firstly, Rosa Parks – her quiet strength inspires me. She saw a need and demonstrated her strength and paved the way for generations to come.
  • Next is Oprah Winfrey, purely because growing up in Europe, I barely saw anyone like me on TV. Oprah made me visible. Watching her on telly allowed me to feel visible and made me realise that impossible is nothing and seeing Oprah day in day out helped me see that.
  • My third is absolutely Michelle Obama. She demonstrates leadership with integrity, authenticity and with grace. To me, she shows the balance between leading with a title yet remaining authentic to who you are. I loved seeing how she brought fun to her role, even as the First Lady. She was unafraid to do things different and that really inspires me. Like going on TV and dancing!!

The Nigerian society and it’s awareness with issues  surrounding bullying and oppression

I think society as a whole needs a lot more education about bullying, oppression and the misuse of power. There are so many historic things that were allowed to happen in the past, that today’s society is rightly saying NO to and that change in attitude needs to be talked about again and again, until we are all on the same page.

I do not believe this is exclusive to Nigeria because there are people in the UK who still brush bullying off as ‘banter’ or ‘character building’ which is absolutely wrong. We define bullying as any behaviour, either verbal, physical, cyber or indirect, that deliberately and repetitively undermines another, makes them uncomfortable, upset and unsafe is bullying.

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#MondayMotivation -Do Something You Love No Matter What

Mondays are always an interesting day to write about. I have previously touched on the Monday Blues. Those of us who have to get going and get it done at work. It is difficult, but our hard work is what makes America great. Keep it up and keep going.

If you are reading this, you made it to another beginning of the week. The reset button has been pressed. You have your coffee, energy drink, juice, tea, or if you’re like me, just a glass of water. You log onto to read a blog and find an article with the title of Monday Motivation.

I am a believer in living your dreams. I was not always like that, but I am now. I learned that you need to at least try to do something that you enjoy doing. If you try and fail, well, at least you tried. If you succeed and are able to make money doing what you love, then you will always be happy in my experience.

We all know that it does not always happen that way, does it? Life can be tough and unmerciful. As you work at it, you might find that doing what you love can be very difficult.

Sometimes, you try, but it just does not work out no matter what you do, who you know, or where you study. You do not get the break you need and you end up stuck in a job that seems completely mindless. Maybe not even mindless, but it could seem like something you do not want to do at all.

Where does that lead you? You get stuck sweeping floors, in a windowless cubicle, a basement, or working up one too many beads of sweat. Hey, if you dreamed of any of those things, that is great. Those are just examples.

Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that it is no fun when you do not love what you do, especially if you have at one time you did.

It can feel like every day is the same thing over and over again. The annoying coworker, the harsh boss, the too friendly receptionist, and of course the HR director who thinks they are a prison warden. You see and hear all of these things and at times you call in sick just to get away. Believe me, I have done it before.

As each minute, hour, day, week, month, year, and for some, decade pass by, you feel like there is no end in sight. You just want to keep on keeping on, but you also want to pull your hair out when it seems like everything is going wrong. Trust me, things will go wrong. Sad, but it’s true.

Am I striking a nerve with anyone?

I bet you are starting to wonder where the motivation is? Do not worry, that is up next.

I will give you some advice: find something you love and just do it. It sounds so simple that it is almost cliché.

 

You might be wondering, “Wait, what happened to all of that “life is tough” talk?” It is true, but what I am talking about is during your “me time.” If you do not have any, make some. You need it.

During this time, do not just sit around and watch TV or do nothing on the computer, do something you love.

If you are an artisan: write, make music, sculpt, sew, draw, paint, or whatever. If you are a cook: try out new recipes as often as you can. If you are into computers: program, invent games, or create an app. If you are into sports: join a gym, ride a bike, learn to skate, learn karate, or take up shooting. If like to read: try a new genre, subscribe to a magazine, or read a long old fashioned novel like War and Peace. Of course, all of these suggestions are just examples. There is no shortage of fun things to love or to learn to love.

Whatever it is, you need that time to yourself to recharge and rejuvenate. I honestly think that more people are unhappy in their work because they do not take that special time for them. It is something that is so important.

I honestly hope that this did motivate you. If you find yourself in a job that is not your first choice, do something you love no matter what.

By : Jacob Airey 

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