Women of Rubies

Author

Esther Ijewere

Browsing

TV network, BET has apologised to Nicki Minaj following the network’s inappropriate shade at her after Cardi B won at the Grammys.

“Meanwhile, Nicki Minaj is being dragged by her lace front,” the station had reportedly tweeted alongside a post about Cardi’s win.

However, BET has taken down the tweet and issued an apology on all their platforms.

“The respect we have for Nicki was violated by a post that should never have been written,” a statement by BET spokesperson reads.

“The post does not reflect how we feel about Nicki. And further does not reflect our company values.

“We deeply apologise for the hurt, disappointment and confusion that this post has caused. We are committed to doing everything we can to address the situation.

“We are also conducting an internal audit to assure these types of posts are not published again.

“We have apologised to Nicki and her team. The post has been removed and we have taken additional appropriate action.

”We understand Nicki’s position and look forward to continuing our dialogue with her. Finally, we apologise to all of her fans. This should have never happened.”

Nicki Minaj apology by BET

Meanwhile, Nicki Minaj will no longer perform at the BET Concert in April. She announced the decision Monday, following the network’s attempt to ‘shade’ her in the aftermath of the Grammys.

The singer announced the decision on Twitter saying: “Young Money will no longer be part of the BET Experience or award show.”

Nicki Minaj then thanked her fans for supporting her.

Another day, AnOther Magazine cover for actress Lupita Nyong’o.

The movie star is simply described as “Majesty” on the cover of the magazine’s latest issue.

The magazine describes the Academy Award-winning star as “A Gracious Role Model for Our Times. Principled yet unpredictable, considered yet authentic…”

She talks to the magazine about her new movie “Us”, working with director Jordan Peele, her role in “Black Panther” and so much more.

Read excerpts below.

On working with Jordan Peele in Us: “I’d walk off a cliff for Jordan Peele. I was madly in love with the mind of Jordan from the Key & Peele days, and I remember putting him on my ‘one day I’ll work with’ list. Then I saw Get Out. I saw it in the cinema five times in one month. I was just so fascinated by it”

On how a meeting with Ralph Fiennes early in her career helped: “I was having lunch with Ralph (Fiennes) one day and he asked me about my interests, and I told him that I wanted to be an actor, I think. He said, ‘Only do it if there’s nothing else you want to do, if there’s nothing else you feel you could do.’ It wasn’t, ‘Here’s my number, I’ll be your mentor.’ It wasn’t that but he gave me a lot of food for thought.”

On Black Panther: “When I think what Black Panther has done for Africans and Africans in their diaspora, it’s this allegorical story about the relationship between Africa and America, reflected in the relationship between T’Challa and Killmonger. It’s a chance for both to consider each other’s perspective in a way that I don’t think popular culture has been effective at doing. It’s really the start of a long-overdue conversation. In no way does it call for answers, but it’s the opportunity to begin to [rexognize] what it is we have in common.”

For more from Lupita, visit AnotherMag.com.

Your voice can be described in different ways, the most common definition is the sound the is being produced when you speak or sing, however, your voice could also be what your opinions are and how you are perceived. It isn’t just the sound but the message embedded in the sound of your voice.

In the corporate world, a career or professional voice may be described as how this message being conveyed in the sound of your voice can be of benefit to its owner.

This article will therefore highlight what you need to know about your professional voice and it’s applications.

The professional voice

Finding a professional voice is the first step in categorising your voice for the workplace. It provides you with the ability to have your personal voice which you use in informal meetings, gatherings or places and still be able to switch to your business or professional voice when necessary. (This improves your social and professional identity). The importance of having a professional voice is that it makes you credible, authentic, organized and it gets you coordinated for a presentation, job interview, business meeting, as well as impromptu meetings. It could be developed by using appropriate words or sentences, having a stable and comfortable pitch or speaking with a comfortable pace. Developing a Professional Voice will improve your ability to engage, connect & persuade when communicating to internal & external audiences. The Professional Voice gives you the confidence, techniques & skills to deliver your message effectively & achieve results. Based on my experience and research in social identity complexity (as related to the work place especially when an individual has various roles) one of the ways to categorize your identity is to develop these professional voices;

The unapologetic voice

The unapologetic voice enables you stand your ground against all odds in a meaningful yet respectful manner. The unapologetic voice make you voice out your values and beliefs in order to set boundaries. Finding this voice gives you confidence in your beliefs and helps you communicate in effectively. This does not mean you have to be rude, it is just being able to know what your values are, what you can and can’t do and being able to say it out and not keep it within you because if you do, you will be able to tolerate anything which may not be healthy.

The appealing voice

When it comes to finding the right tone to ask for a favour, we may all seem to have it but have you ever thought of that tone being misleading? The best way to go about it is by being straightforward about what favour you need and also concentrate on asking for the favour with more percentage of your voice rather than your body language. So, how is that done? With a softer tone and pleasant words (please, can you, I will be grateful, thank you, I’d really appreciate if you could.. ) these words help in conveying a direct message.

The approachable voice

Many people struggle to maintain a good first impression but what about a lasting impression? Your approachable voice should make others feel comfortable to have a discussion with you without having to think of how they might need to please you first. Using words like Hello, it is a pleasure meeting you, how may I help you,  lastly, having your concentration on the person you are communicating with and not being distracted by your PHONE.

Leadership voice:

As a leader, your major goal will be to get your followers to work together to achieve a common goal. Over the years, leaders have adopted various styles that can enable them achieve this fundamental goal. These leadership styles therefore can be seen as either an active voice or a passive voice.

Active voice: participating and coaching style is when a leader is actively engaging in the duties of the team either by joining in working with the team or helping the followers overcome the obstacles and challenges they are faced with by coaching them.

Passive voice: directing and delegating style. This style involves the leader assigning duties to each of the team members. Usually, leaders start by being actively involved in the teamwork and when the leader feels they are ready to work on their own, the passive voice is used to direct and delegate.

Remember, your voice is most effect when the message in the sound of your voice is unambiguous, clear and concise.

 

About Grace

Grace Asemota is a Business Psychologist (M.Sc) and a Certified Life Coach. She has partnered with Organizations and solopreneurs to grow their personal and professional brands and has coached students and staff in different institutions and organisations.

She continuously coaches and trains on the importance of goal setting, happiness, team management, personal development and self- confidence in a wide range of organisations (in Nigeria, UAE and US) and institutions by motivating staff to develop a collaborative culture and identify key factors that can enhance personal growth.

You can get in touch with her on

grace.orisakiya@gmail.com

LinkedIn @Grace Asemota-Orisakiya

 

Getting better at doing the same thing takes few deliberate attempts especially in the work place to guarantee enjoyment. Trust me, some days are sapping while some are really light, but overall, I try to strike a good balance within the week. I have sort of created procedures that guide my everyday work life…but don’t consider me lucky yet, for now, it seems to be working.

So there are activities during the day that deplete my energy. I guess you’re familiar with them: meetings, running around, business trips, conducting a talk, a presentation… what have you. It’s inevitable that you will encounter some form of stress as you work. The good thing is, I set out a solitary time during the day where I reconnect with myself. I find balance in that energy and come out rejuvenated and refreshed. It can be as short as five minutes but it’s part of my daily routine and it’s something that I do on my own.

Additionally, I create a simple sequence of work activities like pre-designed templates which I use often to simplify work. Although, it usually requires little moderation but saves me considerable time which ultimately improves my performance.

I have found that defining this routine helps me outline the steps needed to ensure happiness amidst the long hours put at work. Our best output comes from something we have so much passion for, that the idea of failing bears no meaning. Being able to meet that purpose on a daily basis creates happiness at work. Defining this routine not only helps me recenter but jumpstarts my day which enables me achieve my goals better throughout the day.

Examine your day, do you have a daily routine?

Be Purposeful, Be Happy.

tolaspeaks

 

Adeyoyin Adesina is an experienced educator and Chief Executive Officer of Corona Schools’ Trust Council. She has built her career in the educational sector where she has been impacting the lives of students and teachers alike for over 18 years. A degree holder in English Studies from the University of Ife, a Post Graduate Diploma in Education from the University of Lagos and a Post Graduate Certificate in Education (International) from the University of Nottingham, she is a mentor, coach, public speaker and very passionate about educating young minds. In this interview, she talks about the state of the country’s education, her journey into the world of education, amongst other things.

As a seasoned educator of several years, does the country’s present standard of education give you cause for concern?
Yes, but it is not enough to just say ‘yes’. I acknowledge we have come a long way and even with the worries and concerns I have, I know the educational system in Nigeria has made some progress from where we were before. However, if you measure it with the lightning speed at which things are improving and changing globally, we are still a very far cry from where we should be in the education industry. What makes it more painful is that not only are we aware of this, sadly, our government has not seen the need to attach due importance to education policies and infrastructure. There is so much more we need to do in terms of improving educational standards in Nigeria. As a nation, we are educated, we travel to other countries and see the way things are done but never replicate it back home. Our tertiary education requires a lot more attention than it is presently getting. Our children, because of their exposure, do not want to remain in Nigeria and it is becoming an endemic problem and the government should wake up to its responsibilities before it is too late.

What attracted you to the world of teaching?
I wasn’t always a teacher; I used to work in a bank. Before working in the bank, I worked in the print media for a while and I loved it. I served in Jos and did my youth service at Standard Publishing Company, publishers of Standard Newspapers. I actually stayed on after service because I was very interested in what I was doing then. I did this for about a year before coming back to Lagos and got a job in the bank and that started my journey in the banking sector. Somewhere along the line, I discovered I wasn’t finding fulfillment in what I was doing. Around this period, I was teaching a pre-marital/counseling class in my church and I knew I had found my niche as I enjoyed it thoroughly. I took further classes in counseling to brush up my skills and this spurred my interest in teaching and that was how it all started, and I have never looked back since then.

Take us through your career journey over the years
I started teaching at a private school in G.R.A, Ikeja and within a couple of years I rose to become the academic superintendent of the primary section. In that time, I had the opportunity to travel in the Summer of 2002 for an education development programme for teachers in the U.K and it was there I was introduced to the then Educational Administrator, Corona Schools’ Trust Council. We hit it off and she offered me a job. I came back and resumed at Corona and started work as a teacher and my journey progressed quite rapidly. I started as a teacher in Corona School Victoria Island in 2002 and by April 2003, I had risen to become the Deputy Head of School in Victoria Island. I was D.H.S for three years and in 2008, I rose to the position of the Head of School. A few years after that, I was asked to start the Corona School, Lekki, the newest of the Corona Schools. I was the pioneer Head of School at the Corona School Lekki where I worked for another six years before being moved to Corona Secondary School, Agbara where I worked for another three years as Principal and in April 2017, I was promoted to the position of Chief Executive Officer, Corona Schools Trust Council.

Looking at the constant strikes that affect students in Federal universities, what would you suggest as the panacea for this age-long problem?
I think it is important to look at the reasons for the strike, which is oftentimes, a clamour for better pay, welfare for the lecturers amongst other things. Rarely do the students go on strike, it is usually the lecturers that embark on strike actions. This is why I said we need to place a premium on the education sector. In some advanced countries, teachers are rated as highly as doctors and other professionals unlike what obtains here in Nigeria and if the right priority is given to the sector, I doubt we would have these strikes coming up so often. The government needs to pay attention to their welfare, provide a conducive environment for the staff and students and generally upgrade the infrastructure. I graduated from the University of Ife many years ago and when I went back to my alma mater recently, I almost wept. Instead of things getting better, there is decay and erosion of values. When I was a student in the university, I was so proud of the school. We were just four in our rooms then but what do we have now? Everything is falling apart. What is the welfare program available for lecturers? How often are they paid and how often are their salaries reviewed? These are the major issues we have to consider. I am not saying the strike is the solution because as they are in a standoff with the Federal Government, the students are stranded at home and when they resume, the issues are not fully resolved so another strike is imminent. If the government has a roadmap for education for say, 10 or 20 years and is systematically working to achieving this, it would give us hope. But nobody makes any plan in this country and for the few that do, these plans and projects are not sustained by the incoming government as they roll out their own plans and agenda. Education shouldn’t be politicised.

As CEO, what does your job entail?
(Laughing) I call myself the Chief Executive Messenger because I seek, more often, to do what makes for the progress and satisfaction of all our stakeholders. My role is simply to actualise the strategic imperatives of the Trust Council. Corona Schools’ Trust Council will be 64 years this year and we are still evolving. As a leading educational institution in Nigeria, we hope to translate this to other parts of the world. My role is to ensure we deliver what we promise to our customers, which is to deliver world-class education. As a leading educational institution in Nigeria, we strive to ensure our relevance and influence, not just in the private sector, but also within the government and public sector.

This school has produced so many big names in Nigeria today, how does this make you feel?
I can tell you that there is a feel-good factor in seeing that you are doing something well, that after so many years down the line, the products of the schools can and do acknowledge the quality and pedigree of their early years education at Corona as what has set them off well on the path of life. It is gratifying to see all of our alumni doing well and excelling in their areas of chosen endeavours. We are currently working on bringing our alumni together and we know this would be a great motivator and influence factor for people to see the outcome of quality education. Seventeen years of my life have been given to this great establishment and I am proud and happy to be a part of it.

Running a private school can be very challenging, what are some challenges you face?
Living in Nigeria itself is challenging. Running a technology-based school where power is not guaranteed is a huge challenge. We all know the cost of diesel and the huge cost centre it represents. Excelling at running a school with the standard or quality of available workforce in the market is challenging. How do you deliver on your promise? As we see, our tertiary institutions are churning out half-baked graduates yearly, this is a huge problem. Many parents are facing uncertainty now because of the unstable economy. Many are not able to give their children the quality of education they desire. Amidst all of these, we must find a way to move on and excel. These challenges give us the opportunity to think of creative ways to pull through and overcome.

As a teacher, counselor and shaper, do you take special care in guiding young female students?
We are dedicated to turning out well-rounded young women and men and for every stage of their progression, we know they will be faced with fresh challenges at every developmental stage of their lives and we try to prepare them for these; we teach them about their physical make up, about life, the birds and the bees, monthly cycle, sex education, the do’s and don’ts of their bodies and so on. This is more necessary in this day and age where children are under attack, living with paedophiles and all. We have created an environment of trust in our schools and children can freely disclose to us if they are touched inappropriately in any way. Children do not lie mostly and when a child opens up to you, do not make them feel like they did something wrong. We also try to educate parents who might expose their kids to danger unknowingly.

Tell us something that has influenced your life and career positively?
I would say God, unequivocally. I am a Christian and, in every situation, I ask for God’s help and guidance irrespective of where I find myself. I always pray in every situation and ask that the essence of who I am shines through. I am an influencer and I am conscious of this and this guides me in how I act and speak. There are so many people looking at me and emulating me that I am not aware of and this influences everything I do. I look up to a lot of people and believe I should learn lessons from other people’s experiences.

What advice would you give a woman starting out on this career path?
Be true to yourself and who you are, do not try to walk in anyone’s shoes. Integrity is something we have sadly thrown away these days, but it is the one distinguishing factor that would help you irrespective of your position in life. No matter what you do, your integrity is the only thing that would stand for you and whatever you do, ensure you do it with all your heart, this is the only autograph you can leave. Do not let one part of your life suffer at the expense of another, find that balance and give everything a 100 percent.

What are three life lessons you have learnt and want to share with us?
One is to be yourself. The second is to have and maintain integrity at all times because that is what will help you sleep at night. The third, love people, help people. Take them as they are, as you are going up in life, take others along with you.

CEO Corona Schools’ Trust Council, Mrs. Adeyoyin Adesina.

You do so many things at the same time, work full time and are raising a family. How do you make them all work?
It hasn’t always been easy and I must confess that when my family was still very young, I had to put career on hold for them. All my children are grown and have left home now so that is no longer a problem for me. I had a meeting that ran late yesterday and I couldn’t go home so I stayed with my son in Dolphin estate. My husband thankfully understands and knows this is my passion. When I was still having children, I left paid employment so I could devote time to my growing children. It requires delicate balancing, but it has to be done. There was a time I used to go home with my laptop every night and work late into the night but I realised this wasn’t the best, so I only go home with it now when very necessary. This was what worked for me and while there may be a general principle there, I also realise that one cap does not fit all at the end of the day and what works for me might not work for the next person.

As a mentor, what would you say is the importance of mentoring for women?
Nigerian women need to support one another especially those juggling home and careers. It is even harder for single mothers and we have all realised that we need two incomes to support a home. We need to create effective support systems for one another especially if you have a broad experience and can guide younger women just coming up. I mentor several teachers, counsel a couple and encourage my managers to do same for other people. In church, I lead a group of women that support one another and what we are doing now is supporting young wives that are struggling with wifehood, motherhood and career. We pray for one another, help one another financially or just offer advice and guidance. I have three biological children and uncountable other children that I support, guide and mentor.

What is next for you?
(Laughing) Retirement and enjoyment of life. A lot of us don’t plan for retirement when we are young, and this would be a problem when you get to that stage. I used to think I would open a school when I retire but I have changed my mind, I am not doing that again. I would always be a teacher, educate and train others as long as I have the strength but this wouldn’t be the core of what I would do in retirement. I would do the things I love that I have been unable to do all these years including traveling, spending more time with my family, give my services out to those who need it. In my church, we recently organised a programme where we gathered the teachers in the community and held a workshop on capacity building at no cost to them; I would do more things like this and also make time for food business. I love to cook.

So how do you relax and unwind?
My routine now doesn’t allow for as much rest and relaxation, sadly. The horrendous traffic also contributes to this. My unwinding, for now involves not taking my laptop home from work and after eating at night and sorting myself out for the following day, I basically become a couch potato, watching T.V before going to bed. I try to read as much as possible. I have books everywhere; in my car, on my phone, by my bed, I try to read even if it is a page per day. I also try to make time to see my children when I can.

What is the one thing you want women reading this to take away?
Be you, take the time to know yourself and regularly introspect, place value on yourself always. It’s very important that a second party does not dictate the value you place on yourself. Finally, exercise utmost integrity in all you do. When you place the right value on yourself, it is easier to act with integrity because it becomes easier to see yourself above certain things and situations.

Interview by: Tobi Awodipe for Guardian

Cancer is a disease that affects millions of people every year. Since 2012, the disease has taken the lives of more than 8 million people. Although several types of cancers are just ticking time bombs waiting for their moment, most types can be avoided by living a healthy lifestyle. Although there are treatments, prevention is the only truly effective way of living a cancer-free life. Consider living healthily as an investment for a brighter future, and it all begins with what we put in our bodies.

You may not be aware, but the foods we can pick off of the shelves or from counters can actually contain carcinogens packaged in confusing or misleading names. This list contains the 20 most consumed foods with known carcinogens that you should avoid starting right now.

1. Margarine

foodnavigator-usa.com

Margarine has been regarded as the healthier alternative to butter for spreading and shallow frying, but the opposite is true. Butter from grass-fed cows provides beneficial nutrients to their milk supply, something that you won’t get from the vegetable or animal fat used to make margarine. During the production process, the ingredients used to make margarine are heated to extremely high temperatures which lead to the occurrence of free radicals.

2. Canned Goods

survivallife.com

It’s not that the contents of a can that are dangerous but rather the lining of the can which contains bisphenol-A (BPA), a compound known to trigger brain cancer. Nowadays, you can purchase canned goods from the store that are BPA-free, but you should always double or triple check to make sure you’re getting a safe container. The most dangerous type of canned food in a BPA-lined can is tomato products.

3. Microwave Popcorn

simplyrecipes.com

Both the paper bag and the popcorn can lead to lung cancer. The kernels used in popcorns are most likely GMO, and the “butter” that gives it its iconic flavor is nothing more than an artificial flavoring with high traces of diacetyl. Consider popping your own corn the old fashioned way without the inclusion of fake butter, questionable kernels, and hazardous packaging.

4. Deli Meats

fachton.com

Nothing pairs better with a glass of wine than a thin slice of cheese and deli meat. Unfortunately, consuming the sandwich meat you purchase over the counter can severely increase your risk of colon cancer. Most deli meats are jam-packed with preservatives to give them that “healthy” look for weeks on end before being picked up by an unsuspecting carnivore.

5. Grilled Red Meat

theverge.com

Grilling your meat is arguably one of the best ways to enjoy the natural flavors and juiciness of a thick steak, burger, or hot dog, but it’s the heat and residual char marks that could potentially increase your risk of cancer. The char marks contain heterocyclic aromatic amines, a known carcinogen. You’re better off preparing your steak or hot dog in a skillet than on a grill.

6. Smoked Meat

dartagnan.com

It’s not the smoking process that can lead to cancer but rather the preservatives injected into the smoked meat at your local butcher shop or grocery store. The additives can add up over time and produce toxins that encourage the growth of cancerous cells. Consider purchasing a slab of raw meat and smoking it yourself.

7. Refined White Flour

youtube.com

Refining white flour removes all nutritional value. Bleaching flour is done to make it look more appealing to customers. What you may not know is that chlorine, a hazardous chemical to humans, is used to whiten flour. Furthermore, consuming refined white flour on a regular basis can create an insulin resistance by converting carbs to sugar. The resulting sugar is fuel for cancer cells.

8. Hydrogenated Oils

foodnavigator.com

Hydrogenated oils are oil extracted from vegetable (so far so good) but are then chemically treated to alter how they taste and smell (no longer good). The resulting product is chock full of omega-6 fats – something that we consume way too much of – that can modify the structure of our cells and support the growth of cancerous cells.

9. Farmed Fish

nanaiomibulletin.com

Fish can be one of the healthiest forms of protein we can consume. However, the farmed-raised variety of fish will do nothing for your body. Because fish are raised in a bacteria-filled environment, they need to be given antibiotics, pesticides, and other carcinogenic chemicals to control the growth of viruses and parasites. The resulting fish have most of their nutrients removed and replaced with cancer-causing compounds.

10. Alcohol

insiderguides.com.au

They say that the poison in food and drink is in the dosage. There’s a fine line between moderate drinking and overconsumption of alcohol. A glass of red wine a day will help keep your brain sharp, but more than that will exponentially increase the risk of contracting cancer.

11. Refined Sugar

newtimes.gr

We all have a sweet tooth, but indulging in sugary treats is a main contributor to the growth of cancer cells. Sugar has been proven to be one of the most addictive substances which is unfortunate since cancer cells thrive when abundant levels of sugar is present. Perhaps the next time you feel a sugar crave coming, it’s time to go cold turkey and nibble on a carrot instead.

12. Carbonated Beverages

foodnavigator.com

Soda has never been good for us. Considering the high levels of fructose corn syrup and mysterious food colorings, it’s amazing that the drink is even allowed to be sold in stores and even in school cafeterias. The carcinogen in carbonated drinks can be found in the refined sugars used to give it the sweet taste we’ve grown to love.

13. Potato Chips

fitnea.com

Although our bodies require sodium to function properly, having too much of it can destroy our bodies and increase the risk of stomach cancer. Apart from being way too salty, potato chips get their crispiness from acrylamide, a carcinogen used in cigarettes.

14. Artificial Sweeteners

npr.org

Since sugar can cause cancer down the road, what is the healthier alternative to keeping our teas and coffees sweet? We can tell you right now that the answer does not lie in a packet of artificial sweetener. Aspartame, a popular artificial sweetener, can wreak havoc on your organs and cause cancer.

Last month, Mo Abudu launched Your Dream Moment with Mo, a new mentoring programme for young women. In doing so, she was fulfilling a lifelong dream of her own to contribute to the development of Nigerian girls who are driven to make the most of their talents and opportunities.

Staged at the Oakwood Park Hotel in Lekki, the day consisted of a series of practical workshops, led by a number of influential speakers, including Bola Adesola, CEO, Standard Chartered Bank; Nimi Akinkugbe, CEO, Bestman Games; Lanre ‘Coach’ Olusola, author and life coach; Bidemi Zakariyau, CEO, LSF PR and Veronica Odeka, Founder, Vanestyle. Naturally, the event was anchored by Mo herself, as she dispensed pearls of wisdom and experience, encouraging the young ladies to reach for their dreams in a very strategic way.

Bola Adesola shared her personal journey of balancing a successful career with being a wife and mother, along with tips on goal-setting, being purposeful, living a full life and finding a spouse who supports your ambition. Lanre Olusola spoke about the principles of success, finding your purpose, loving yourself and having a clear vision for your life.

Nimi Akinkugbe‘s theme was Wealth Management & Funding Your Dream and she emphasised the importance of budgeting, saving, investing in yourself, lifelong learning and finding your passion. As Nigeria’s foremost celebrity stylist, Veronica Odeka, spoke about the importance of style as a way of projecting your personality, standing out from the crowd, increasing your confidence and improving your self-esteem, as well as sharing tips on building a beauty brand. Bidemi Zachariyau gave pointers on how to build a personal brand and why it is critical to impressing your next employer or client.

Speaking after the event, Mo Abudu expressed her gratitude to the speakers and support staff who made the event possible and how much it meant to all the attendees. “I’m so glad we finally made this happen. The future of Nigeria is extremely bright if we manage to nurture our young women and empower them to make their dreams and plans come true. I learned so much today about the strength, resilience, innovation and creativity of these bright young women, and I am determined to continue with this mentorship programme to ensure that as many as possible become successful entrepreneurs, executives and top professionals. They have so much to offer Nigeria.”

Amongst the attendees were lawyers, doctors, bankers, bloggers and entrepreneurs, looking for a way to fast-track their way to greater heights. Judging from their response, Your Dream Moment with Mo, was a resounding success. As the first in a series, the programme will continue across Nigeria throughout 2019.

When you meet Fatima Habib   you would think she is in her late 30’s because of her wealth of knowledge and go getting spirit, The 19 year old undergraduate from Borno state is the founder of of Advocacy for Human Value Foundation. An initiative she started when she was just 14 . Fatima has organised over 15 projects across Northern Nigeria, Impacting lives and giving voiceless women a voice. She is also the first Girl to work on the Fight Against illiteracy in the North and the First to lead the Bring Back Our Chibok Girls in her state.

Fatima shares her story with me in this interview as she expresses her passion for Northern women and the need to help them find their place in the society

Childhood Influence

My parents were my first teachers. Things they say and do, their way of being and relating to me and others, laid the foundation for many of my beliefs, values, attitudes and respect to people around me.

I attended my Secondary School (Adeola International School Abuja) also contributed in some of these after my parents laid down the basic foundation for me to Startup life.

Fatima!

I was born in the year 1999 September 23rd. I am Kanuri by tribe and hail from Maiduguri, Borno State. I had my Primary and Secondary Schools at Adeola International School Abuja and later moved to Maitama Model Secondary School Abuja to complete my SSCE in 2015.

I am the Founder of Advocacy for Human Value Foundation (a Non-Governmental Organization registered by Corporate Affairs Commission in February 2017). I am as well an activist who is advocating against the negativity of child sexual exploitation and promoting girl-child education and almaJiri education system in Nigeria. I am currently studying Political Science at the University of Maiduguri  (year 3) and also an alumni of Young African Leaders Initiative (Yali)

Touching lives

About thousand of people’s lives have been impacted and shaped with my foundation as we have been able to give children their right education by enrolling them in schools and funding their education. We have done a lot of fund raising on social media platforms and also television in providing hospital expenses to the people with special disabilities ( Vulnerable members of the society). Periodically, I visit the Internally Displaced Persons’ (IDPs) camps in Maiduguri and hold discussion session with some of our targets where we talk out the problems faced by them.  This leads to curing of trauma and depression amongst the vulnerable members in the various camps we visited.  I recently started the advocacy on Sexual exploitation. We advocate to make these victims become more stronger, well-informed so despite the daunting challenge they could be able to speak up and change the face of the world.

Work challenges

Combining school and charity work,I will never advise others to try this because this is the worst way of taking the risk. It’s so challenging. Sometimes you are at work and an important class is going on and sometimes while in school and an important meeting or conference of Humanitarian nature is going on that may require your attention.  Another challenge I face is lack of an office accommodation which would have emboldened me perform and achieve better than what I am doing at the moment.

Starting at age 14

 During our secondary school, as students we were taken to orphanage homes on excursion several times by my school Adeola International School and in most cases the way and manner the orphans positively behaved and acted made me emotional. The thought of what the future held for them and given the minus of not having both parents spurred me to develop the interest of helping the orphans and the less privileged members of the society.

Supporting Northern women

I am trying to make women get access to capital and also empower them in collaboration with some entrepreneurs so they learn entrepreneurship because Women run 30% of all registered businesses worldwide, yet only 10% of women entrepreneurs have access to the capital they need to grow. Partnerships are crucial: mobilising the skills and resources of public and private sectors creates a bigger impact than working in isolation.

 Other Projects

As my religion preaches humility in giving, also advocates feeding the hungry, regardless of race, religion or background. It is such an important part of the religion that Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said a person is not really a Muslim if he goes to bed satiated while his neighbor goes hungry. In line with the above I have initiated and executed the following projects and programmes so far in 17 states to my credit:- Fundraising workshop, Outreach to Christian and Muslim widows , Community awareness on HIV/AID, sponsoring 20 children through school and many more.

Reward

My greatest reward was my recognition as the Youngest humanitarian of the year 2017, Nigerian Goodwill ambassadors award.

In five years…

I see my organisation Successfully deep into Humanitarian Activities; done with strata of schools having equipped myself to face challenges of life and established orphanage-home and college inshaa-Allah

My Inspiration

Let me start with the man whose character, intellectual milieu and philanthropic gesture to whosoever approaches him in the day, middle of the night or at whatever condition you get to him are very rare in our world of today. He is Dr. Mohammed Kyari Dikwa mni, a Permanent Secretary designate in the Federal Government of Nigeria, also Dr. Zainab Bagudu (the Kebbi state First Lady) whose Medicaid Cancer Foundation similar to my Foundation’s objectives remains dear to my heart as a woman. I also had the opportunity of meeting Hajia Laraba Shuaibu (a barrister who works with my dad in Corporate Affairs Commission) in 2014 with my siblings. She had a cupboard-of awards displayed in her sitting room which I believe was as a result of her versatility, network and consistency towards her work and profession.

Being a Woman of Rubies

 I am very ambitious. Supporting and encouraging people to pursue their own goals and dreams, I make my own as well. I have a vision for my future and chase after it with voracity.

Advice to women

 Try to stay positive by being a positive thinker so I positively shape the lives of the vulnerable members of the society for them to believe in positivity too.

 Polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) is a common health problem caused by an imbalance of reproductive hormones. The hormonal imbalance creates problems in the ovaries. The ovaries make the egg that is released each month as part of a healthy menstrual cycle. With PCOS, the egg may not develop as it should or it may not be released during ovulation as it should be. Signs and symptoms of PCOS often develop around the time of the first menstrual period during puberty, but sometimes PCOS develops later in response to substantial weight gain.
PCOS can cause missed or irregular menstrual periods. Irregular periods can lead to infertility (inability to get pregnant). In fact, PCOS is one of the most common causes of infertility in women. It also leads to development of cysts (small fluid-filled sacs) in the ovaries
Who gets PCOS?
It happens to women of childbearing age. Most women find out they have PCOS in their 20s and 30s when they have problems getting pregnant and see their doctor. PCOS can however happen at any age after puberty.
Women of all races and ethnicities are at risk of PCOS. Your risk of PCOS may be higher if you have obesity or if you have a mother, sister or aunt with PCOS.
What causes PCOS?
1. High levels of androgens: Androgens are sometimes called “male hormones,” although all women make small amounts of androgens. Androgens control the development of male traits, such as male-pattern baldness. Women with PCOS have more androgens than normal. Higher than normal androgen levels in women can prevent the ovaries from releasing an egg (ovulation) during each menstrual cycle, and can cause extra hair growth and acne, two signs of PCOS.
2. High levels of insulin:  Insulin is a hormone that controls how the food you eat is changed into energy. Insulin resistance is when the body cells do not respond normally to insulin. As a result, one’s insulin blood levels become higher than normal. Many women with PCOS have insulin resistance, especially those who are overweight and have unhealthy eating habits,  those who do not get enough physical activity, and those who have a family history of diabetes (usually type 2 diabetes). Over time, insulin resistance can lead to type 2 diabetes.
3. Inflammation: Women with PCOS often  have increased levels of inflammation in  their body.  Being overweight can  contribute to inflammation. Inflammation can cause high androgen  levels.
 4. Obesity: 80% of women with PCOS are  overweight. The inability of insulin to  function normally is one reason why    women with PCOS tend to gain weight or find it hard to lose weight
What are the symptoms of PCOS?
1. Irregular menstrual cycle: Women with PCOS may miss periods or have fewer periods (fewer than eight in a year). Some women with PCOS stop having menstrual periods.
2. Too much hair on the face, chin or parts of the body where men usually have hair: This is called “hirsutism.” Hirsutism affects up to 70% of women with PCOS.
3. Acne on the face, chest, and upper back
4. Thinning of hair or hair loss on the scalp: This is male-pattern baldness.
5. Weight gain or difficulty losing weight.
6. Darkening of skin, particularly along neck creases, in the groin, and underneath breast.
7. Skin tags, which are small excess flaps of skin in the armpits or neck area.
8. Infertility
Can I still get pregnant if I have PCOS?
Yes. Having PCOS does not mean one can’t get pregnant. PCOS is one of the most common, but treatable, causes of infertility in women. In women with PCOS, the hormonal imbalance interferes with the growth and release of eggs from the ovaries (ovulation). A person who doesn’t ovulate can’t get pregnant.
Your doctor can talk with you about ways to help you ovulate and to raise your chance of getting pregnant.
MY  OWN KIND OF TREATMENT
When a sufferer of PCOS comes to me , I ask her how far she has gone medically. Her blood sample must have been taken to check her hormonal levels. Her fallopian tubes should have been checked to see that they are not blocked. Since  a sufferer also has insulin resistance, I ask if she has ever checked her blood sugar levels. In fact, this is why a diabetic drug called Metformin is always part of PCOS treatment. I then start with these steps:
1. Since we have established that most sufferer of this hormonal imbalance are overweight, I encourage them to lose weight. She will be told the kind of diet to eat and will be encouraged to be exercising.
2. The liver is where our hormones are processed. If the liver is sluggish, things won’t work well. So, they will go through liver detoxification. By the way, do you even know where your liver is? Ok, put your hands on your right ribs; move your hand to where your rib ends. Are you there? Ok, that is where your liver is!
3. The ovaries will be detoxified.
4. You will be surprised that spices in your kitchen are very useful for treating this condition. Some of them are garlic, turmeric and garlic .
5. When the woman starts seeing her menses, I teach her on how to  track her ovulation periods. So she gets to understand the days to have sex.
After all has been done, if the fallopian tubes of the woman are “patent” (as doctors say), that is, if they are not blocked and the husband’s sperm count is normal, nothing stops them from hearing the patter of tiny feet in nine months!

Being a child of God, I have heard so many teachings on wholeness, and why it is vital for an individual to live a full fulfilled life  accept oneself as you are and live with the knowledge of what you allow in your life, and how all this can influence where we are and how far we want to go.

I want to share my wholeness lessons, and how it is essential for us to be fully aware of whom we are and live a happy productive life. Wholeness calls for a complete stock take, by this I mean, know what who you are in every good and bad circumstance, know how you are affected by people and situations around you, know your highest points in life and how you react at your lowest??

How do you react when in a bad situation, either you are dumped by a boyfriend, fired from your dream job, falsely accused or even the times nothing goes your way?? How do you treat those around you??Do you beat yourself up each day and blame every one, anything and everything??What about the times we hit it well and win a jack pot??Do we throw away all we have, thinking we have made it?? Wholeness calls for us to know how you react when one steps on your foot. Do you step on them or slap that person for inflicting pain on you, or you accept it couldn’t have been unintentional???How you react shows what is within, your strength, weaknesses, flaws, at times it even reflects the things we are afraid of. It shows how much closure one needs on the events that happen,at times it is a reflection of how much we need to work on our character and growth for the future. There are some wholeness checks one can do to find out how we are doing:

Firstly, accept yourself fully, character, current position, current financial standing, body type, accept there will always be some better than you, and one who is where you want to be, and that what matters is how much you put in to achieve all your dreams and goals. Once you make peace with all this, you will always know your seasons in life and will never compare yourself to another person, because you are fully aware of your uniqueness and are working to improve on that fully.

Secondly, wholeness calls for peace with both situations, and people around you, it calls for an effort to always see that you don’t allow another’s persons negative energy to influence you nor your decision.it interprets fully being responsible for how you react to a situation, and how you let external factors make you feel. Many people around us carry a lot of baggage, hurts and pain, and there will always be an encounter with such a person, but when you have made peace with yourself, negativity will never affect your being in any way. The other aspect of being whole is dealing with all failure, let downs and disappointments. Many times someone lets us down, we tend to bury or medicate instead of finding a solution or let go. We rarely get closure on issues, hence at a later point we least expect, things arise, so if one hurts us ,we need to deal with that issue immediately and get closure to have peace and move on positively, we equally need to learn to apologize if need be, not for the sake of the oppressor ,but yourself, make peace.

Lastly, build a relationship with yourself, make time to connect with yourself and emotions, take time to know how you are doing and see where you need help, and when stuck and not sure, find someone who has gone ahead of you, someone you trust to not tell you what you want to hear, but will willingly help you be the best version of yourself.

Love yourself enough, to not give what is biased.

Pic credit: Khoudia Dip (Pintrest)