Says: “Growing up I never had a textbook of my own

Founder of Self-worth Organization for Women Development, Mrs. Chinyere Anokwuru is a replica of a woman who has been through the vicissitudes of life she didn’t bargain for what life offered her. Having lost her mother at a tender age of 16 when she needed motherly direction and care, she was left to create her future all alone. She got into school with a resilient resolve to make something out of her life. She engaged in several petty businesses just to realize her dream of attending a university. She is a graduate of Lagos State University where she studied Microbiology.

Early preparations

I became responsible for myself from a very young age. I was born into a very poor family and getting three meals a day was not an easy task. My other siblings and I never had textbooks of our own. I always had to copy from my friends who could afford theirs. After the close of school each day, I would visit the houses of neighbors to wash their clothes, fetch water for them and generally run errands for them in exchange for food, their used clothes or little cash. So I grew up desiring a better life. I managed to sponsor myself through university by engaging in petty trading on campus. Getting a job became practically impossible. In order to survive the poverty, I became a road side telephone call operator and recharge card seller. Along the line, I lost a child because I could not afford N1, 500 for a hospital scan that would have detected the complications I had during pregnancy. I held on in faith and did not relent in praying to God. To cut a long story short, I overcame every of those challenges and began to live the life of my dreams. I recall making a vow to God, that if he helped me get over that difficult phase of my life, I would do my best to ensure that no woman or girl around me would go through life feeling helpless and vulnerable.

Passion for philanthropy

Like I said, I understand what poverty is. I have experienced what it means to go to bed not knowing where your next meal would come from. I know what it means to be threatened with a quit notice. I know what it means to be sent out of class for non-payment of school fees.

Therefore, immediately I found my feet, I knew I could not allow other women and girls go through the same thing, particularly the widows who have their children depending on them alone for their every need. These factors birthed in me the passion to do whatever I can for women and girls. I practically have to empty myself to do all that I do, but you see, what matters is the feeling of fulfillment; I can’t begin to describe the peace and joy that overwhelms me whenever I give of myself.

Empowering widows and girls

In order to effectively carry out my social responsibility, I founded Self-worth Organization For Women Development; a non- governmental organization that works with the rural and urban poor to alleviate the lowest form of poverty and create wealth through skills-acquisition, capacity building, leadership training, advocacy, gender mainstreaming and entrepreneurship training.

Our women empowerment project replaces aid with sustainable income and helps women to “graduate” from extreme poverty by giving them the tools they need to start small businesses in their communities. We implement a high-impact poverty graduation program for ultra-poor women. We help them acquire life skills. We fund them to start small businesses in their rural communities. With these, they can pay for food, school fees and medical care for their families. The organization has had significant success in developing a micro lending scheme that empowers women to break cycles of poverty and become financially independent. We have conducted several teen girls’ conferences and have empowered the girls with personal self-esteem kits. Many women have received generators, chillers, sewing machines, hair dryers, industrial stoves, etc to boost their businesses.

Challenges

Like every other humanitarian organization, our major challenge is funding. There are so many women and girls on our list waiting to receive aid. We do the much we can, but there is still a lot to be done. We are constrained by limited funds. We are thinking outside the box on how to establish social enterprises that will generate the needed support for our projects.

Tempted to give up?

I have never felt like throwing in the towel on this cause. No one forced me to do what I am doing. Nobody talked me into it. This is a cause that is very dear to my heart. I am very passionate about this. Therefore, there is no stopping me.

Testimonies of impact

Well, I have been blessed with a lot of testimonies from women who have benefitted from our empowerment projects. For me, this is the greatest reward. Seeing their confidence restored and their initial despondency turned into hope. No other reward beats this feeling of fulfillment. My joy cannot be quantified when I come across these women and they just run up to hug me. Another game changer for me was when I was appointed as Senior Special Assistant to the former governor of Lagos state for my efforts in alleviating poverty and empowering women in Lagos State.

No excuses

Let nothing stop you. Lack of education, poor communication skills or your background should not prevent you from pursuing your dreams and excelling. This is not the time to wallow in self pity. Think outside your circumstances. All over the world, women are rising up and smashing glass ceilings. Your success depends on you and on the actions you take. Understand that chatting all day will not put money in your purse. Buying every Aso Ebi that they bring to you will drill more holes in your pockets faster than you can imagine. Who says you can’t go back to school? Who told you can’t learn a new skill even as a graduate? You can become whatever you want.

Being a woman of rubies

In addition to being a mother and home maker, i am also an author, inspirational speaker, empowerment expert as well as a business woman. I feel blessed knowing that my role as a key player in improving the socio-economic conditions of women and girls has been widely recognized. Today, you have nominated me as a woman of rubies and I am greatly honored. Thank you.

Dr Ada Igonoh’s heart-wrenching tale of steadfast faith while she was an Ebola patient, inspired many Nigerians to hold on to the power of miracles when faced with life’s daunting challenges. In this interview Dr Ada Igonoh shares her survival story, lessons learnt and why she is a woman of rubies

How it all began

On the 20th of July, Mr. Patrick Sawyer, a Liberian diplomat flew into Lagos from Monrovia. When he got to Lagos, it was discovered that he was unwell and weak. He was subsequently brought to First Consultants Medical Centre, Obalende, where I work. He was brought to our hospital because he was being hosted by ECOWAS and all ECOWAS staff in Lagos uses our hospital. When he got to the hospital, he was seen by the doctor on call who took his blood samples and tested for malaria which was positive. Mr. Patrick Sawyer denied contact with an Ebola patient or attending a funeral service within 3 weeks prior to his presentation at the hospital. Unknown to us, he had just buried his younger sister, Princess who died of Ebola in a Catholic hospital in Monrovia, Liberia. We couldn’t fully understand why he chose to hide such relevant information if he really wanted to be helped. We didn’t doubt that he knew he had Ebola at the time he came to our hospital because his behavior was odd. He was admitted as a case of malaria but was not responding to treatment, which made us begin to suspect that he may have Ebola. On the second day of his admission, I was the doctor on duty. He called to see a doctor that evening and I went into his room to see him. He complained that he had been stooling and vomiting that day. I noticed his IV bag was on the bed so I picked it up and hung it in the drip stand and left the room. I then washed my hands and informed Dr. Ameyo Adadevoh of the patient’s condition.

“I found him dead”

On the 22nd of July, 2014, we took blood samples to test for Ebola and informed the Lagos State and Federal Ministry of Health that we had a suspected case of Ebola. The patient then started mounting pressure on us to be released to attend an ECOWAS convention in Calabar. The hospital administration led by Dr. Ohiaeri refused to let him leave. On the 25th of July, 2014, after his condition worsened, I found him dead in his toilet and that was more or less the beginning of panic and anxiety. His result had come out the night before his death as positive for Ebola. He was cremated that same day according to WHO guidelines and the hospital discharged every single patient in the wards and was shut down for 2 months for decontamination.

Discovering I had Ebola

I had already begun to suspect that I may have contracted Ebola because I was ill and not responding to treatment. Slowly, my temperature started to rise and it was not until I had a fever and vomited and started stooling as well that I knew the reality of the matter. At the time, I was still very positive that it may not be Ebola and so when I was informed that I tested positive, I was shocked but not as shocked as I could have been if I didn’t suspect. I had peace that surpassed all understanding and I did not feel defeated by the news.

Having personal contact with Sawyer

I was terrified. I immediately started to recount my days with him while he was on admission. I kept searching my memory to be sure of how much close contact I had with him, all the while convincing myself that my contact with him was minimal and nothing to be so worried about, but I was wrong. It was such a tense period for me, because now it was a waiting game. I was required to wait for 21 days to heave a sigh of relief, but 8 days into my surveillance period of 21 days, I tested positive. I didn’t want to die and I knew how serious having Ebola was. People were dying every day in Liberia, Guinea and Sierra Leone.

Lessons learnt from the experience

I have learnt to always be thankful no matter the situation. I have learnt to appreciate life and to understand that only the living can live, life is not for the dead. This has affected my life in such as way that I live each day happily as much as possible. I value my family members more because they stuck by me throughout my ordeal. How many people would dare visit an Ebola patient? People are so afraid for their lives that they would rather pray for you at home. My family showed a great deal of optimism even in the face of death. I am grateful for my husband, mother, father and siblings. I have learnt to depend on God more than I ever did. He was and is my healer, my sustenance and my all in all. I have learnt to laugh more, play more, be more empathic, to not take life so seriously that i forget to enjoy it. I have decided not to live a life of mediocrity, because there’s a lot that I have to give and a lot that have been given to me. To whom much is given, much is expected.

My believe in God

Faith in God and his word made me believe I will be healed. I believed there was more to my life and that I was not going to die under that circumstance. I counted on God to see me through to the end and he did. Nothing else gave me assurance of life.

Faith over fear

Faith is the substance of things hoped for. The evidence of things not seen. I had to believe I would survive against all odds. The faith of the woman with the issue of blood in the bible made her whole. Without faith, it is impossible to please God, so if you go to God, you must believe that he is and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him. The word of God told me that God was interested in healing me. Not only was he interested in healing me, he was able and willing to do so too, all I had to do was believe. Jesus bore our sins when He died on the cross and he took whipping and beatings so that I can be free of sickness and disease. My faith was like a hedge around me, protecting me and giving me support.

The Psychological effects of losing my boss and colleagues

I was deeply hurt by the death of Dr. Adadevoh, Dr. Abaniwo, Nurse Ejelonu, Nurse Aide Ukoh and all the others who passed on but I have come to realize that God knows best no matter what.

Measures taken to stop the vomiting

I initially started taking Imodium to stop the diarrhea but when I got to the isolation centre, I was informed by the WHO doctor that I should stop taking the Imodium because I needed to let the viruses out. I was not given any drug to stop the vomiting. I was rather instructed to take at least 4.5 liters of Oral Rehydration Solution daily to keep up my fluid levels but even that was not sufficient sometimes because of the quantity of fluids I was losing, so I used my clinical knowledge to determine my intake. I counted my pulse regularly and monitored the color of my urine. If it was concentrated, it meant I had to increase my fluid intake until my urine became less concentrated. If I had a parched throat, I also drank more ORS.I studied Ebola online and learnt that dehydration was a main cause of death in Ebola, so I would usually take a bottle of ORS with me to the toilet to drink while stooling. I also had it by my bedside permanently for frequent gulps.

The miracle

I was overwhelmed with happiness when I discovered the virus had cleared from my system. I was overjoyed. It was a confirmation of God’s faithfulness.

Being a woman of rubies

Ruby is a precious gem usually very hard and expensive. A woman of rubies is a strong woman of substance, worth and priceless. I am a woman of worth, substance and I am priceless not because of my abilities ,but because of the God I serve.

On the morning of the 2011 elections, Oluwaseun Ayodeji Osowobi woke without the inclination that she will be raped that day. She was undergoing her mandatory NYSC programme and was raped by election touts who wanted her to collect bribe and compromise on her values. Though Seun was violated, but she has become a testimony, helping other rape victims to overcome their hurt and ordeals. The unassuming damsel is the founder of Stand To End Rape Initiative (S.T.E.R), an NGO geared towards helping rape victims overcome their hurts and helping them to speak up .She shares her tale of survival in this interview

My rape story

I was a corps member who was delegated by the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) and the National Youth Service Corp(NYSC) to serve as an INEC registration official in one of the villages in the State. During the course of my work, I was offered bribe by one of the political aspirants to register under-aged children as being eligible to vote, so as to boost the votes from that community for the aspirant. An offer I rejected. This resulted in the village and community members detesting me for hindering one of them from attaining his political right. They set a trap for me to be raped by one of the village boys. When I was raped, I was devastated. I was shattered because I had been raped as a virgin. I had broken the family tradition of girls from my household marrying as virgins. I was angry that society didn’t protect me when all I​desired was for the society to be better through credible elections. I was infuriated by the negligence of the Nigeria Police Force towards getting justice for a poor rape victim like myself. I was the shadow of myself, a mirror broken that couldn’t reflect the beauty it saw.

My regret refusing the bribe

I regretted refusing the bribe. Maybe if I had, I possibly wouldn’t have experienced such an incident. I asked myself questions like: “What made me believe my personal beliefs or expectations for my country will make a difference? ​These bugged me and gave me restless moments that led to​ self victimization. The shame of losing my virginity was unbearable; I felt filthy and was drained of any self-worth.​

 Psychological effects of being violated

​ Victims experience both short and long-term psychological effects of rape. One of the most common psychological consequences of rape is self-blame, which is used as an avoidance-based coping tool. Self-blame slows or, in many cases, stops the healing process. Other common emotional and psychological effects of rape include:

Available help

My housemate at the time had seen me bleeding. So, she was the only help available to me at the time. I spoke to her and she gave me basic first aid at the time. I was clueless as regards “What to do when raped.” Going to the hospital for checkup wasn’t something I was accustomed to .Just like most people today, I only knew I had to report to the Police Station — a place I had expected to get all the help I required.

Police wanted to confirm the veracity of my experience

Like I mentioned earlier, I reported to the Police Station. I met my waterloo when one of the officials had said they needed to “confirm” my claim of being raped. He literally said they had to check me. I felt humiliated. The problems victims generally face dawned on me. The Station didn’t have a rape kit or any amenity required to confirm rape had occurred. How exactly did they intend to carry this out? I decided to live with my ordeal and save myself from further emotional degradation.

My mum said complaining wasn’t enough?

I advocate for rape victims because I was one of them. I had no help or support. My mum said it was not okay to complain about the problems, it is also taking the initiative to be the solution in my own little space. She motivated me to know that the incident didn’t just happen to me. It happened for a reason and she counseled me to figure that out and fix whatever the problem was. I decided to bridge the gap between victims of rape and the services, laws and support they require. Most times, rape victims need direction on where they can get help. Due to the culture of silence that thrives in Nigeria, they require laws that alleviate their already painful situation. This and more motivated me to at least contribute my own quota and help the few that cross my path.

From a mess to a message

I believe my life was orchestrated for a divine purpose. God is preaching a message through my mess. This isn’t to say I had to be have been raped before fulfilling purpose, however, God used my story to reshape that of others. Maybe my life would have probably had no meaning as much as it does today if the incident hadn’t played out. There is nothing more important to me than being a reason someone can make lemonade from the lime that has been thrown at them .I believe I was branded to motivate other rape survivors to be limitless. I created no space for the rape experience to brand my existence and reality. God helped me use my story to create a platform to speak about his awesomeness.

My inspiration

My inspiration is to fulfill what the master has carved me to accomplish. If I was doing it for myself alone, perhaps I wouldn’t be where I am today. I possibly would have long sought another part. But because I was made for this, I didn’t know where to turn to when the incident happened to me, now that I know better, I can help people with that information and also ensure they are able to access the various services at their disposal and that which my organization can provide. My inspiration is to serve God more in this capacity and also to encourage rape victims to become survivors and reassure them that life doesn’t end at the point of rape. I am inspired to use my experience to connect with other people’s trauma and shame. I am also inspired to see more rape victims become healed, because the more I see people thriving beyond their stories, the more my heart leaps for joy. I forget my pain and just glory in the gain. I am inspired to sowing a seed of joy and restoration into people’s lives

Challenges of running Stand To End Rape

We live in a country that is wearing a veil of silence. Therefore, getting more victims to speak up has been a bit challenging. We have free medical, legal and psychological services to offer. If people do not access this, it will be a wasted effort for our organization. Some survivors who have actually taken the courage to speak out have lamented on the responses and body language of the Nigeria Police Force as a discouraging factor .This stops them from appearing once more at such stations. Also, their inability to immediately arrest the erring rapist poses a lot of threat.

Being a woman of rubies

In this context, I believe a woman of rubies is a woman of substance, value and worth. ​ A woman of rubies is one who not only makes an impact, but is exceptional and also inspires others to do same. I and other women working to make the world a better place in their own little capacity, are women of rubies.

Adetoro Omoba’s tale reads like a movie script. She lost her mother at the age of three and also lost her dad some years later. Living life without the care and love of her mother pained her. The emotional and psychological needs of a motherless child made her to start caring for the motherless and less privileged in the society. Her pain has since been woven into a purpose. Out of her sore experience, she established the Adetoro Omoba Cares Home (ADOCA). ADOCA is a is a nongovernmental organization(NGO) geared towards the welfare of the poor, the rejected, the motherless, physically and mentally challenged and the less-fortunate ones in our .She shares her story of triumph and living without a mother’s love

Growing up without a mother

I lost my mum at the age of 3.My guardian was the one who raised me. He is a Christian and a very devoted man of God. While I was growing, I realized that the paradise of every child is connected to their mothers. I felt odd among my friends then because I see all of them in church and parties with their parents. I was raised in a CAC home where we were trained as if Jesus Christ will be coming next day. While growing up, I would tell my friends, I don’t want Jesus to come now because I want to grow old and build homes for the motherless children. I intended to give the love I couldn’t find to these children. I never knew there was anything like an orphanage.

Starting out

As God will have it, these experiences prepared me to be clear about what I would do when I grow old. I never knew I would be the one at the helm of affairs, giving care to the less privileged. In 2005, I lost my job with a Telecoms company I was working with. I had to look for another job in a school. While working there sometime in May 2005, an incident happened. Two women along the street where the school is located died. One of the teachers came into the staff room and announced that the young women had just passed on. When I heard it, it was as if something disconnected on my inside .The passion overwhelmed me again. Prior to this time, I had lost the drive .Two days later; two of the prefects came to me persuading me to help them establish a social group. As they were taking their leave, something just said to me: Instead of establishing a social group for them, why can’t you do something that will be focused on taking care of motherless children?” I shared the idea with the prefects and they fell in love with it .I also shared the idea with the proprietor of the school. He didn’t believe me at first, he said some teachers had tried doing something similar and they failed to do it .I now had to convince him by sharing my personal story of losing my mum at a tender age. He became convinced and told me to go and start. The deal was that if I can run it for 3months, he is going to support me with 30,000.We started in May 2005

Growth

The initiative grew beyond the school it started from .The students started telling their mothers about it. That same year, we gave two of the senior students scholarships for their NECO exams .We also supported students who have lost their mothers .The following term, what we were given became more than what we needed, so we had to start extending our scope. I decided that even if we don’t have the money to build the motherless homes, we can collaborate with the existing ones. So I and some of the students would visit the existing motherless homes like Little Saints Orphanages. The passion became so much that I couldn’t do something else.

Challenges

One of the challenges I face is the negative opinions of people .When we started, some people usually advise some of my staffs to get another job, saying the children they take care of, are aliens. People started segregating themselves from us as if we are running a shady deal. Last year, when we celebrated our nine years anniversary, we had a challenge with transportation. My team and I were waiting for the other caregivers to bring the children to the venue. Each time they get a bus and the driver sees the children, the driver zooms off saying they cannot give them a lift .The one that eventually gave them a lift was paid double of the amount he was supposed to be paid. People have stigmatized these angels .It’s like the society doesn’t love them. It hasn’t been easy financially, spiritually and otherwise. It’s been challenging. One thing that makes us happy is that God has been faithful and God has been making it easy.

Persisting against all odds

We are all humans. There are times that you will face some challenges and you will be like “God! What is happening”? But honestly I never felt like giving up. When some of our friends come here, it is either their love for me increases or reduces. A friend once suggested the idea of me relocating to the USA.As a result of the fact that I am a single mother and she also looked at the fact that I am doing all these alone without support from anywhere .I told her I can’t leave these children whom I call my angels.

Meeting these ‘Angels’

There has never been a time when we picked them on the street. All those we have met, came as a result of referrals .Some of them were brought by their parents and some have been abandoned by their parents as a result of their birth defect. We have 24 of them here, but we still have more than 40 that we ought to have admitted. As a result of space constraints, we couldn’t admit them.

Support from the government

We need support from the government. We are under Ogun state jurisdiction. This is the mathematics part of it, if you have 24 children here, 19 of them are usually from Lagos. ADOCA home is registered with the Corporate Affairs Commission and also registered with the State government, Abeokuta

Nigerians approach to philanthropy

It’s not as if we have all the support we need, but we need to be grateful for the little we have gotten so far. I want to say thank you to those individuals who have supported us so far. We haven’t gotten support   because we haven’t gotten much of media support. We need more of awareness creation .Recently a man saw us on Facebook; he sent us a message saying he will love to contribute his own bit. I never knew he is an Oba. We met him; he saw some of the things we have done and decided to give us one hectare of land .He gave us one hectare to build a much more comfortable apartment for the angels. It amazed us. Some of our donors are here in Nigeria and some are from USA.

Greatest reward

I will consider the one hectare of land as the greatest reward so far and also the media support from Orisun TV too. When we started out, we pay 15,000 for 5minutes TV interview. For the past one and half years, Orisun TV has been of great assistance. We haven’t had to pay.

In dire need of assistance

Our 10 years anniversary is coming up very soon .One of our major constraints is transportation .We lost one of our angels Tobi, because we couldn’t get quick transportation to the hospital. He died by the time we got to the hospital. It was a sad moment for us. We need kids’ wheelchair. We also need Physiotherapists that can volunteer to help these children .When we take them to churches, people don’t usually want to associate with them. On the flipside, some churches show us love whenever we take them there. People are usually surprised when they meet me.

Driving force

My driving force has always been God. Everything about my own personal life has always been God. My strength comes from all the challenges I have been through.

Being a Christian

God is a great God. He has his own way of weaving our lives .When my father died it wasn’t as if he left tons of properties for me .My father a introduced me to God at an early age. On his death bed he told me this: “If ever you want to let go of anything, never let go of love. The moment you start letting go of love, you will start dying and becoming lonely”

Final words

When you see these children as disabled it affects the way you treat them. I am using this medium to tell the people out there that we need to show love and respect these special ‘Angels.’ Majority of these children are suffering from birth defect. Before you condemn them, you should try and show them love .

Being a woman of rubies

There is a driving force within me that is bigger than me. Until you love yourself, you cannot love somebody else. The love I have for myself has made me love others .What makes me a woman of rubies is the fact that God has been helping me to make a positive impact in the lives of these ‘Angels’.

Ogo Maduewesi’s experienced a sour drift in 2005 with the arrival of the first light patch on her face. This occurrence transformed her life forever. Being afflicted with vitiligo isn’t a joking matter but Ogo has chosen to make lemonades out of the situation. Ogo’s organization, Vitiligo Support and Awareness Foundation (VITSAF) , is spearheading the first effort to tackle the challenges surrounding vitiligo in Nigeria. She is on a mission to create awareness and provide succor for individuals, living with vitiligo. Vitiligo, is a skin condition in which white patches of skin appear on different parts of the body especially exposed areas like the face and hands

Introduction

My name is Ogo Maduewesi. I am a typical Nigerian girl from the eastern part of the country. I do a lot of things at the same time. I just can’t leave my Vitiligo cause for any other thing .I believe you can talk about vitiligo and impact lives positively through it. I am one woman that believes so much in myself .I believe so much in inspiring others to bring out the best in them.

Discovery

I woke up one day in 2005 to discover a spot on my lip. I think about three weeks down the line I noticed another spot .When I saw it, I said to myself: “I need to do something about this”. After trying out what my physician gave me for a few months, instead of getting a positive feedback, I was getting more white patches. I now had to look for a dermatologist and that was how they diagnosed that I have vitiligo. That’s how I got to know.

My state of mind

Before I met the dermatologist, I met a family doctor. I spoke with him on phone and he didn’t understand what I was talking about. When he saw me, this was his first utterance:” This is not happening”. His reaction got me scared. I asked him: “What is not happening?” He asked me if I know the condition Michael Jackson had. I said I don’t know. He told me it’s called vitiligo. He gave me the spelling and told me to go and read about it. When I read it, as a typical Nigerian you know how religious we can be, I just rejected it and moved on. When I checked online, it was as if all the negative things written about it found me. I read up things like vitiligo not having a cure and one might turn white completely. I was just scared. When I got to the hospital, I wasn’t told I have vitiligo, I just saw them scribble vitiligo on the form. I went blank .I said to myself: “Why will this happen to me? You know a whole lot of things were going through my mind. It was not a good moment.

Moving from the sad state

After finding out that I have vitiligo, the experience I had in the hospital wasn’t good. A dermatologist came to take pictures of us and tried to tell me what I am living with. She just said you are not the first and you are not going to be the last. I met another lady that same day that was diagnosed and she just told me:” I am going back to the village that is where I think I will find help”. I told myself: “I don’t think the village is where I will find help for this.” It was not easy. The funny thing is most people living with it; don’t even know what they have. I was eager .I needed to see other people. I needed to share other people’s experience. I needed someone to tell me: “I have the same thing and this is how I have been coping” but I didn’t get that. I was looking for experiences to get myself encouraged, in the process I found myself encouraging others. We had a support group meeting with Femi Segun, may his soul in peace. I just wanted people living with it to share their experiences. That was how it all. True Love Magazine did an article on it in June 2008 .It was a huge one. People started making enquiries, sending mails and all that. I was working on myself because I wanted to live my life

My wake-up call

My pastor preached a message and said something that you should not give people the power to bring you down you should be in control of yourself. It just got to me that I have been giving people power over my emotions. So I took a bold step by wearing a spaghetti strap to Balogun market. Before then, I had never worn a spaghetti strap without a small jacket .I decided to do it to see if I will be able to withstand the comments. I worked round the market from one end to another and was just smiling all through. People were making their comments and my fellow Igbo guys were making their comments. When I finished walking around, I boarded the bus again and I said to myself: “So for real, I have been giving people the power to bring me down to decide what I wear, what I do and where I go at a particular point in time.” From that day, it was a huge turning point and I now said:”I have my life to live, you choose to stare at me, and it’s up to you”. These days I say to myself: “I want to sell confidence to whoever wants to buy”

Parents’ reaction

I called them on phone to tell them about it. My cousin told them something terrible about me that I have grown skinny and more like a walking dead. My father called and told me he wants to see me home the next day unfailingly .I told him I can’t make it because of my job’s commitment. My mum cried on phone, the news got to her. I travelled home in December of that year for the burial of one of my cousins who was part of the Sosoliso crash. I met my parents at the burial. Initially my experience with my dad wasn’t a good one .He couldn’t understand why I will be exposing myself while they are trying to shield me. While I was starting to talk about vitiligo, he just didn’t understand it. At first I listened to him and later I had to tell myself: “You need to live.” I didn’t pick my Dad’s call for 6 months because he wanted me to stop talking about vitiligo. Somehow, I didn’t know how it happened but he became my number one supporter. He became interested in my initiatives. My mother was heartbroken when in the midst of it; I went on low cut because she believed my braids will cover the vitiligo patches

What drives me?

I think one of the things that drive me is peace. Does that thing give you peace? Is it something you are comfortable and happy doing? Seeing smiles on the faces of people living with vitiligo drives me. I want to see them smile; I want to see them live. If not for the drive, I probably would have dusted my certificate and be involved in another cause .I want to see people with appearance challenges accepting themselves and living their life to the full irrespective of what the health community says or what the society says.

What breaks my heart

What breaks my heart when it comes to Vitiligo awareness is that the international community is yet to see it as something to give attention to. It’s not been easy I must tell you. I started this officially in 2009 and as at that time, we didn’t really have much people talking about vitiligo. We are doing the bit that we can but we need that recognition from the international community. In Nigeria, our health awareness goes in the direction of what the international community identifies with. It’s heartbreaking that there is a whole lot of works that we need to do .We don’t really have that kind of support. Recently I launched our crowd-funding project .Somebody told me that Nigerians don’t identify with things like this, that doesn’t mean we should not make efforts. We are not giving up hope

Vitiligo and my perception of life

It has changed my life completely. I have come to understand that humans are not who they are. What they say is not what they do. I have come to understand people for who they are. I have also come to understand that it’s not really about what the next person thinks, once I know what I am doing is right and legal. The typical human being always wants you to do something that will suit them. There is something I have noticed about the guys here. They try to bring a woman down at any given opportunity. When you don’t have a job, they use the opportunity to take advantage of you. Here, we don’t have the patience needed to get things started have come to understand that if there is something you want to do and you believe so much in, forget about what people will think.

Creating the Vitiligo Awareness and Support Foundation

My vitiligo foundation is created to share the experience I have had living with vitiligo .It’s to discuss what has worked and what hasn’t worked .Like I mentioned before, we created a support group without even knowing. That was how it started. I didn’t set out to start a foundation. I just found myself doing that and next thing is that we are found ourselves registering an organization.

Awards and achievements

I created a day set aside all over the world to put the spotlight on vitiligo. It’s called the World day of Vitiligo. Lagos State also sent me a commendation letter because I had sent them a letter for support .The recognition has been from individuals +

.I have been given Architects of the Future Award. I am an Ashoka Fellow and I made the Tech Women Programme, a US sponsored programme.

Being a woman of rubies

A woman of rubies is that damsel who believes in her strength. The crowd doesn’t move me. I am happy that I have been able to use the resources I have to create something. Accept yourself for whom you are. It is not easy, I know. If you set your mind to it, you can make it happen .As a woman don’t allow a man to be your yardstick of achievement.