self development Archives

In self development January 9, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

OGECHI OFURUM-OMEIKE SET TO HOLD 2ND FUTURE BUSINESS LEADERS CONFERENCE

The Future Business Leaders Conference is an initiative of Techie and Savvy.

It is a platform where they expose primary and secondary school pupils to industry experts with the aim of spurring them to become value driven, take decisive actions towards greatness, create an entrepreneurial mindset in pupils and provoke similar conversation between participants.

Last year, Techie and Savvy organized the first Future Business Leaders Conference and it was a huge success. We had pupils from over 20 schools in attendance.

According to Ogechi; “This year, our aim is to make it bigger, better and open to as many schools and pupils that are willing to participate. As such, seats shall be allocated on a first come, first serve basis. At Techie and Savvy Entrepreneurship Club, we are particular about enabling our pupils become creators of value. We believe that every child is born with inherent talents and potentials which when properly nurtured and developed will function to position them for success and greatness. Hence, the theme for this year’s conference is: My Talent and I”.

The speakers shall be looking at subject matter areas such as:

How to discover and harness your talent, the importance of learning a skill, how to create value with your talent and potentials and how to position yourself for greatness.

Objective: At the end of the conference, participants shall be able to:

•Identify their God given talents and inherent potentials
•Learn how to harness their talents and potentials
•Understand how to create value using their talents and potentials
•Develop strategies on how to monetize their talents and potentials.

Program Details:

Theme: My Talent and I
Date: 5th March, 2020
Venue: Pelican Hotel, Chevron
Time: 8:30 am

To have your school pupils attend this event, kindly send us a direct message or send a Whatsapp message to 08091747563.

Registration Closes on the 21st of February, 2020.

In Inspiration January 7, 2020 By Women of Rubies

DANIELLE OUTLAW BECOMES PHILADELPHIA’S FIRST BLACK WOMAN POLICE COMMISSIONER

Philadelphia has hired Danielle Outlaw, making her the first black woman police commissioner hired to lead the city, according to ABC News.

Outlaw was previously the police chief of Portland, Oregon, where she was also the first black woman to hold that position. She had been Portland’s chief of police since 2017. She was appointed to the latest position this week by Philadelphia Mayor Jim Kenney.

In a press release, Mayor Kenney said, “I think constantly about what it takes to be a police officer. Our men and women in blue leave home each day knowing they are about to put their lives at risk to protect our community, and that even on a good day they are likely to encounter extremely challenging and disturbing situations. I know officers take on this sworn duty, first and foremost, to help Philadelphians. Their devotion to public service is never forgotten.”

“But make no mistake: while I have tremendous respect for our officers, the Philadelphia Police Department needs reform. I am appointing Danielle Outlaw because I am convinced she has the conviction, courage, and compassion needed to bring long-overdue reform to the Department. After meeting and speaking with her at length, I came away confident that Danielle Outlaw possesses the strength, integrity, and empathy vital to the tasks ahead.

Outlaw is taking over the department four months after former police commissioner Richard Ross resigned amidst allegations that his department had engaged in sexual harassment and racial and gender discrimination amongst its ranks.

“I am honored by the faith that Mayor Kenney is placing in me to lead the Philadelphia Police Department. While I am new to Philadelphia, I am not new to the challenges of big-city, 21st century policing,” Outlaw said. “I encountered and dealt with the issues of employee health and wellness, equity, contemporary training, crime, fair and just prosecution, community trust, homelessness, substance abuse, police accountability, and innovation and technology—just to name a few—as I worked various assignments and rose through the ranks in Oakland, California. And I directly addressed these issues while leading the police force in Portland, Oregon.

“Modern policing is data-driven, but the paramount factor is not so easily quantified: trust—the trust residents have that their police force will keep them safe and treat them with respect. I am convinced that trust can be restored, here and across the nation. I am convinced community-police relations can be rebuilt and fortified through dialogue, transparency, and accountability.

“It will be a privilege to serve as Philadelphia Police Commissioner and to serve all who live and work in this great city. I will work relentlessly to reduce crime in Philadelphia—particularly the insidious gun violence that plagues too many communities. And I will do so in a way that ensures all people are treated equitably regardless of their gender identity, race, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. I am convinced there can be humanity in authority; they are not mutually exclusive. That was true in Oakland and in Portland, and I know it is true here in Philadelphia.”

Outlaw is a member of the International Association of Chiefs of Police Human and Civil Rights Committee, as well as the National Organization of Black Law Enforcement Executives.

Culled from Black Enterprise

In self development January 5, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

6 SIMPLE WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE ATTRACTED TO YOU

If you are looking for a long-term partner, job, or more friends, you will have to make them attracted to you. Here are the 7 simple ways to make people attracted to you without turning them off.

1. BE CONFIDENT, BUT NOT ARROGANT

First, it is important that you are confident about yourself. Being proud of who you are and liking your characteristics is one of the keys to make people like you. This also includes being sociable, being able to go along with the conversation and being smart when talking. Confidence is attractive, but you have to remember not to be conceited or arrogant as you might only push people away from you.

2.SENSE OF HUMOR

People who are funny are known to be intelligent and sociable. Most people are looking for this characteristic when searching for romance or friends. Even if someone is not interested in you, you can grab their attention by making them laugh.

3.ASK DEEP QUESTIONS

Cut the unnecessary conversations and start asking them deeper questions. This can make them personally connected to you and you can tell them something deep as well.

4. DON’T FORGET TO SMILE

You can easily make someone comfortable talking or having long conversations with you when you smile often. Of course, smiling is the easiest way to tell other people, “hey, don’t hesitate to talk to me, I’m friendly.”

5. EYE CONTACT

Making eye contact to a person makes you appear to be dominant and confident. This also makes you appear clever. You can also pair it with a strong handshake and you would totally nail it!

6.DRESS PROPERLY

When trying to make people attracted to you, it is important that you give attention to how you dress. Most people give definition to the clothes a person wears. It can be a definition associated to success or personality so if you want to make people notice you or attracted to you, make sure that you dress well.

Let me also add HAVE MANY PEOPLE AROUND YOU

People who are in groups tend to be more attractive. This is because it shows you that you are sociable and you can easily connect to other people. Having many people around you makes you look more attractive.

Kindly like, follow and drop your comments… *winks* . I will be glad to hear from you.

Esther Ijewere

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In Inspiration January 4, 2020 By Women of Rubies

MEET THE LEGENDARY CICELY TYSON AND HER BELIEF ON INTUTION

Cicely Tyson is a long-standing African-American actress, with a career which has lasted seven decades in the American screen. Aside longevity, she is known for her portrayal as a strong black woman in movie roles which in turn has earned her love and respect in the hearts of many, an inspiration to many women both young and old.

Tyson spoke “I am a firm believer in Divine guidance” in an interview with OWN Oprah’s Master Class OWN Oprah’s Master Class.

Several years ago she made similar statements about how she landed her acting career without knowing all what there is but believed that it was part of a divine plan to an inspiring life purpose. And she proves it with her actions because she puts her whole heart at what she does beyond the fame or glitz.

Before she takes on a role she puts it to a test, an instinctual test.

“Either my skin tingles or my stomach turns,” says Tyson “If my skin tingles, I know it’s something that I must do. If my stomach turns, I know it is something that I cannot do. With this “skin-tingling” she accept roles to which she truly feels a connection as a dynamic Award winning actress that she is.

Her many feature credits also include Diary of a Mad Black Woman,The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter, Fried Green Tomatoes, Because of Winn-Dixie, Hoodlum,, Madea’s Family Reunion, Why Did I Get Married Too?, The Help and Alex Cross and lots more.

Tyson won the Emmy for best lead actress in a drama as well as a special Actress of the year for CBS 1974 telepic The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman. she has also received an honorary Oscar at the Governor’s Awards, the latest in a lifetime’s worth of accolades that includes the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the NAACP’s Spingarn Award, a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and countless NAACP Image Awards and honorary doctorates.

“I have learned from every single character that I’ve played,” she continues. “Something emotionally, spiritually and psychologically true.”

She therefore ensures to take roles that are transformational for herself, and the world. It is no wonder she stands out as a queen mother to lots of women as she carries herself with grace, confidence and worth.

“I’ve never done a job just for money,” she says. “I could not do anything that would not enhance humanity — especially women.”

She turns 96 this year.

Ladies!! what a Queen.

•Pamela Mbata

In self development January 3, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

7 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULDN’T GIVE UP

I just can’t do it anymore!” ,

“I am tired of life”

We have all said it at least once in our life, at least I have, but before you throw in the towel and give up totally why don’t I encourage you huh? You need to tell yourself these 8 things to give yourself the last ounce of motivation you need to accomplish the impossible:

1. Take a break

Oh dear Lord, I do this all the time, I did last week as a matter of fact. I was overwhelmed with everyhting around me, so I deleted my Facebook and removed my account from my multi-Instagram account for my sanity. Here is what you can also try; Get up, stretch and take a brief walk. Even taking a few minutes away from a stressful situation can help you come back with a fresh mind and determination to tackle your difficult task.

2. I’m doing this for a reason

Remember why you started. Maybe you picked up a second job to provide for your family. No matter the task, remind yourself why you need to follow through. Remembering the purpose behind your daunting load can give you the motivation to carry on. Keep a “Grateful Journal” too, it helps you appreciate your journey.

3. Ask for help

Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of humility. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when needed, especially from your friends or Inner circe. The people who love you want to help you any way they can.

4. Gratitude

List at least five things you’re grateful for, starting with life itself. It can be tough to come up with things you’re thankful for when you feel like the world is crumbling, but take a moment to focus on the good in your life.

5. Let go of Negativity!

Give up things that are holding you back – negative thoughts about yourself, frustration, worry or whatever else. You will find it’s easier to focus when worrisome thoughts are pushed out of your mind.

6. Yes I can !

Whatever your challenge may be, you’ve got this. You’ve done hard things before and you can do it again. Assume your Wonder Woman pose and conquer your responsibilities like the super hero you are.

7. Focus on one thing at a Time

Break your large project into smaller tasks to make it easier to accomplish. For example, if your goal is to have a clean home, focus on one room at a time. Looking at the project as a whole can be overwhelming and leave you stressed and unmotivated to continue. Tackle one thing at a time, and you’ll be surprised at how much you can accomplish.

Kindly like, follow and drop your comments, or perhaps add your recommendations too.

Esther Ijewere

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In Entertainment January 2, 2020 By Women of Rubies

Toke Makinwa Wants us to Start Year 2020 with some Positive Energy | Watch Toke Moments

Toke Makinwa is starting the year with loads of positive energy, and she wants us to do the same.

In the first episode of “Toke Moments” for year 2020, Toke shares some lessons she learned in 2019, and she advises that we surround ourselves with people who give us positive energy.

She also sends a special message to online trolls, asking them to tread carefully in 2020 because it’s a “high voltage” year.

She wrote:

Its the 1st of the first month of the year and I am serving energy. Happy new year to all the Toke Moments Lovers out there, hires hoping your year is as beautiful and impactful as you desire. Thank you all for rocking with me, I honestly cannot thank you all enough. Please subscribe to my youtube channel and lets have so much more fun in 2020. The vision is simple, you don’t like something , stop making excuses, quit it and turn up High voltage to the things that feed your soul. I love you all, TM.

Watch the video below:

Source BELLANAIJA

In self development January 2, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

4 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE BETTER OFF AS FRIENDS WITH HIM

Sometimes the line between like and love can be hard to distinguish. We’ve all been in that one relationship with a guy where all the pieces fit together perfectly.

He was charming and smart and funny and sweet and you get along like gangbusters. But in spite of all of this, there was a little voice in your head wondering…

“Would we be better off just as friends?”

Let’s get one thing straight right now: There is nothing WRONG with friendship.

Friendship is dope as hell and really rewarding for the people in it. How can you tell if he’s a perfect boyfriend or better off as your bud? There are lots of different signs, but we’ve pulled together the big ones to help you out.

Here are 4 signs you and your boyfriend are better of just as best friends

1.You can’t imagine a future together

You’ve been dating exclusively for a little while now. So it’s natural you stop to think about the future.

Not so natural?

Maybe you just can’t picture it. Or you don’t like what you see. You like him a lot, maybe you even love him, but when you think about making a life with him in it you draw a blank.

2. You love him but not that way.

When your friends talk about how much they love their boyfriends you get worried. Sure, you LOVE your boyfriend, but you aren’t on cloud nine or anything.

He’s a great guy, you take care of each other, you’ve got a lot of common interests. But it doesn’t seem like the storybook love affair true love is supposed to be. That’s because it isn’t … it’s true friendship.

3. You hate living with him.

You guys have been living together for a while and… You can’t stand it. It’s not that you each have quirks and need to get used to each other. It’s that you aren’t compatible as living partners romantically. You’d be better off as buddies, hell, even as roommates.

4. You want to open the relationship up.

Your relationship is going just okay. You have sex, and it’s also just okay. You don’t want to break up because it feels like there’s no real reason to. But you want to open up the relationship so that you can meet new people. Boredom and dissatisfaction in your relationship is not a sign you should open things up.

It’s a sign you’re dating a friend and not a lover.

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In self development January 2, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

4 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE A PEOPLE PLEASER

Do you find it hard to say No?

Do you obsess about what others think of you?

Do you seek validation for everything and from everyone?

Do you feel sad when you disappoint others even at the detriment of your mental health?

If you say yes to all of these, you are likely a chronic people pleaser and this article is just for you.

Incase you ask how I know these things, It’s because I was a people pleaser (Still recovery though lol) for the longest time till I worked on myself and focused on the rule of “Self before others”.

Here are 3 common signs of chronic people-pleasing and some ways to overcome it:

1. You’re Incapable of Saying No

Do you find it painfully hard to turn down the requests of family, friends, and even acquaintances or strangers? You really want to say no, but instead, you say yes to their various demands.

Before you know it, you’ve become the go-to person when something needs to get done. From the small to the large, you take on every task. You may even be considered a hero to some.

On the inside, you’re suffering. You genuinely want to help others, but you also know that you are depleting your own resources with every “yes.” You may fear that you’ll lose your friendships and good reputation by saying no. After all, last thing you want to be called is selfish.

Solution

First, realize that your capacity to care for others and your capacity to care for yourself are not mutually exclusive. In fact, the two are intimately related.

Second, understand that you are not responsible for the happiness of those around you. They are. Let these two realities give you permission to say no. Start practicing with small requests. Refuse kindly, and without apology.

2. You feel sad When You Discover Someone Doesn’t like You

This is a hard one. It seems reasonable to assume that if you go out of your way to please everyone, then everyone will like you. But it’s not true. Some people will dislike you simply because of who you are or for reasons outside of your control. You understand this intellectually, but you cannot stop trying to win the few holdouts.

Solution

Closely examine your desire to be liked by everyone. Did this originate in your childhood, as you tried to win the affections of family members or friends at school? Use tools such as reflection, meditation, and counseling to help you let go of past negative experiences.

As social beings, we need to be loved and accepted – but not by everyone. Decide whose love and affection is worth the effort and whose is not.

3. You’re Unaware of How Far You’re Willing to Go – Until You’re in over Your Head

This is a sure sign that you lack proper boundaries like my old self . You avoid setting limits because you believe this runs counter to having a generous spirit. But this simply allows people greater latitude to intrude into your life. The requests may become more and more unreasonable and you may not realize it until someone has crossed the line.

If you’ve taken on too much, you may experience passive aggressive behavior, crying for no apparent reason, anxiety, or depression.

Solution

Be willing to admit that your time and energy are limited, not because you’re selfish, but because it’s the truth. Boundaries are simply a recognition of that truth. Do not be afraid to set your boundaries and enforce them. It will take a while for you and others to get used to it, but you’ll experience an increased sense of well-being, and people will learn to accept your limits.

4. You Avoid Making Decisions or Sharing Your Opinions

Do you have a hard time voicing your opinions and feelings in a group setting or with close friends? Do you constantly allow others to make decisions for you? Oh dear, this was me for many years, oops!

Over time, this behavior is deadly, because as you defer to the opinions and decisions of others, you are silencing your own voice. This will rob the world of your unique perspectives and gifts.

Solution

Remember that you can disagree without being disagreeable. People can have diverse opinions and still treat each other with respect and kindness. So give voice to your thoughts, concerns, and needs.

Also, If you sometimes feel resentful towards others and you don’t know why….

This often happens when we suppress our feelings and needs over the long term.

Do you feel unexplained anger toward your close friends, spouse, or boss? The anger is your subconscious telling you that you have been neglecting yourself while helping others advance their goals. Think of this resentment as the “check engine” light turning on in your car. Don’t ignore it.

Solution

Face the truth of what is going on in your life. If you’re feeling overextended or taken advantage of, acknowledge these feelings. Avoid second-guessing yourself. Find time for self care, and make this a priority.

By Esther Ijewere

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In self development January 2, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

11 WAYS TO BE A MORE LOVING PARTNER

“Are you in a relationship presently and you are trying to figure out how to love your partner more?”

“Are you about to go into one and need to know how to love your partner right ?”

This article is for you!

Read on and learn some of the doable ways in which you can learn how to love — become more loving, win your partner back, and enjoy a satisfying relationship. Once you know what genuine love looks like, it will be easy to implement.

Most people mistakenly think that love is a feeling. Here’s the thing, they have it all wrong.

In order to be more loving, you have to understand what love truly is. It’s not just a feeling. It’s a Commitment. It’s an Action. It’s a Decision..

It’s understandable why we’re confused about love. The movie industry has put a spell on us. They have us believe that two people can fall in love.

True, genuine love begins after the spell wears out, after the honeymoon ends and real life begins.

Are you ready to become a more loving partner? You look ready to me. Let’s go!

1. Commit to Your Relationship

Decide that you are going to be in the relationship; that you are going to work toward its growth; that you will nourish it to the best of your ability. Without that commitment, you don’t have the necessary foundation to build a loving relationship. That is why this first step is crucial.

If you have that commitment, read on.

2. Invest Time

The workaholic who works 60 hours a week might say, “I love my family so much. I’m working hard to provide for them.” That’s not love. Remember, love is not a feeling; it’s not words. It’s an action that you decide to take. One of the most important ways to demonstrate love is to spend time with the person you love. After all, time is our most prized possession. You show someone you love them by spending quality time with them.

If you want to become more loving, find time every day to connect with your loved one. You can do this with a text, a phone call, or a lunch date. Be creative.

3. Communicate Your Love

There are countless and effective ways to do this. Find ways to communicate your love through action. Bring home a treat, do the dishes, make dinner, leave a note in his favorite coffee mug, etc. Before he leaves for the gym, my husband takes off his chain and sets it on his nightstand.

As a writer, one of my favorite guidelines is, show, don’t just tell. By doing this, the writer provokes a reaction from their readers, helps them feel the emotion the character is feeling. This works in real life as well.

Take an action, however small, that SHOWS your partner you love them.

4. Acknowledge the Thoughtful Things Your Partner Does

One of the ways to be a more loving partner is to acknowledge all your partner does for you. You might be taking your partner for granted and not even realizing it.

Do you thank them for doing the laundry, walking the dog, making dinner, doing the dishes, working out, replacing the soap and shampoo before it runs out, etc? There are a million little things that keep a home going, and it’s easy to forget that someone is doing it. Acknowledge it.

5. Be Supportive

In what ways can you be supportive to your partner? Maybe it’s supporting a hobby they have, or wishing them a fun girl’s day out, or being there for every music recital, etc. When you’re supportive, your partner will feel like they can’t fail. It will provide the encouragement they need to keep going and have fun at the same time.

6. Provide Space

Clinginess can ruin a relationship. Too much of anything can be deleterious to its survival. Yes, it’s good to spend time together. In fact, I recommend it, but it’s also good to find a healthy balance.

Providing space means you allow your partner to express himself/herself in the way they enjoy. Allowing your partner time with friends and family is important. You don’t have to be by their side 24/7.

“We all need time to explore, reflect, and express ourselves individually.”

Create a space for your partner so that they can express their creativity. Let them be them without you. Remember, they were someone long before you came along.

7. Avoid Put Downs

Here’s the thing, when you’re in a relationship, you pretty much know everything about your partner–the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s easy to resort to put downs when you’re angry and upset about something they’ve done.

For example, let’s suppose they’re late for a movie. It happens. Don’t start in with, “Late again?! Jeez, you’re never on time, you moron!” Or, “No wonder your parents are disappointed by you!”

What are you trying to accomplish? It certainly doesn’t sound like you’re having a constructive discussion. It actually sounds like a war in progress.

We have enough strife in the world. Don’t allow it to infiltrate your home. Speak with respect. Let love be the motivator, not pettiness.

8. Be Willing to Compromise

Relationships are partnerships. Often, one or both of the people involved forget that; they’re a little too self-absorbed, always wanting what they want when they want it regardless of how their partner feels.

Since all relationships require some form of compromise to be successful, the couple has to work as a team. It’s always a give and take. Willingness to compromise can go a long way in creating happiness and feelings of well-being in the relationship.

9. Listen

You might think you’re listening, but next time your partner is talking, pay attention to your thoughts. What are you thinking? Are you really listening? Are you formulating your answer? Have you tuned out? True listening requires a great deal of effort, but it is a gift to the person who is feeling heard.

When you truly listen, the other person feels valued, important, like they matter. And isn’t that a gift you want to give your partner? It doesn’t cost a thing, but the dividends are priceless. True listening is the encapsulation of love.

Try this exercise, ask your partner a question, then really listen. Don’t get discouraged if your mind wanders for a spell, bring it back and re-focus. Your partner will sense your attentiveness and be ever so grateful.

10. Drop Old Issues

It might sound crazy to bring up past issues and hurts while in an argument, but couples do it all the time. There is no reason to bring up the past. Ask yourself: “What’s the point? What am I trying to accomplish? Am I trying to fix the problem or make it worse?” Old issues have no place in the present. Let them go. Concentrate on the here and now.

The bottom line is: make your relationship stronger, not weaken it.

11. Learn to say “Sorry” and mean it

People make mistakes. It’s good to apologize. Not just a fake apology, but a true, heart-felt apology. Apologies go a long way to repair a broken relationship. If you are in the wrong, say it. Mean it. Make sure the person understands that you are making amends.

You are not going to come off as weak if you say you’re sorry. Not only will you validate your partner’s feelings, you’ll gain respect. More than likely, your partner will say something like, “It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean that.” Make amends when you need to. Your partner will look at you with the loving eyes you crave.

Final Thoughts

Love is the most beautiful thing on earth. Being loving is the most amazing gift you can give. All the heart flutters, the butterflies in the belly, and the buckling knees, can’t replace genuine loving acts.

Don’t allow your relationship to be fed by simply stringing a set of words together. It takes a great deal more than that. It takes a Commitment, an Action, and a Decision. Done over and over again.

You have everything you need right here. It’s the start you need to make it to the finish line of your relationship. If your relationship has suffered an injury, implement the above tips for a week, a month. See what happens.

Esther Ijewere

In self development January 1, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

YEWANDE JINADU: 5 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN NEGOTIATING A NEW SALARY

Salary is very important in the life of an employee. In fact, that is the reason why people leave their houses every day to go to work. A lot of people have made mistakes in the area of negotiation, and I can totally relate with it. This is for those thinking of making the next move in their career, but don’t want to later regret their salary due to lack of information.

Know the difference between Net Pay and Gross Pay and ensure you negotiate based on Net pay
Gross pay is the total amount an employer pays to an employee. Gross pay includes the breakdown of what an employee is entitled to, and it is from the gross pay that deductions are made, while net pay, which is also known as take-home pay, is the amount you receive after all the deductions, like tax, pension, etc., have been made. It is preferable to state your salary expectation in terms of net pay because you may not know the basis for which deductions are made in the new company. When you negotiate on net, it ensures that you’re not on the losing end, and the HR will do some calculations before making you an offer, which will be more than what you negotiated. This is to leave room for deductions. E.g., your letter may carry ₦150,000 as pay, but by the time you receive your first alert, you will be getting ₦120,000.

Ask about other benefits that the company offers during negotiation
Some companies have variable pay, based on certain conditions like the performance of the individual or the company. Some benefits may be in kind and not be cash; this should be noted when you want to mentally calculate your pay. What I’m trying to say is that do not reject an offer because it doesn’t really meet your expectation; find out if they have other perks, which can be considered. Also, if you’re coming from a place that has a lot of office perks, don’t take an offer just because it pays higher. E.g. if you’re coming from a place that pays for membership of professional bodies as well as subscriptions, car, performance bonus, higher HMO package, etc.

It’s best you put a cost to the benefits you were enjoying before, and ask if it exists or it would be more, then weigh your options.

Do your own research
You may think you have gotten a good offer, but when you get in, you may eventually get disgruntled when you realise that your colleagues who have the same job description with you earn far above what you accepted. Jobberman, Payscale and Glassdoor will help give you insights on relevant data. If you can make calls to people in the industry who will have an idea of the range, it would be helpful (not necessarily the exact figure, though). Some people on Nairaland sometimes disclose pay for some role, so please dig well.

Be open to negotiation
I always advice to mention something higher than what you expect, then tell them you are open to negotiation. E.g., you earn ₦150,000 and the minimum you can take before considering an offer is ₦220,00. It’s best you say ₦280,000 then tell the recruiter it’s negotiable. This way, they don’t start negotiating from ₦220,000.

Negotiate based on what works best for you
I’ve realized that different things matter to different people at various points in their lives. This guides their decision to take an offer or reject it. E.g., I have a friend that a premium HMO is what mattered most to him (at that point in his life) because his wife needed it. To someone else, he was stupid for taking that pay, but he negotiated an HMO package that saved him millions for the birth of his child. For some people, proximity is more important, for some it’s staff bus and canteen. Whatever your own case may be, identify it and negotiate with that.

Don’t be pressured unnecessarily. Negotiate with confidence, because you know the value you will be contributing to the organisation. Don’t be scared to have that conversation when it’s time.

I sincerely wish you the best in your career. Don’t forget to join our next Twitter Mentoring Session on the 22^nd of June by 2pm by following @careerlifeng on Twitter.

About Yewande

Yewande Jinadu is the Founder of CareerLife Nigeria(www.careerlife.com.ng), a Certified HR Professional and an Employability coach. CareerLife Nigeria is a social initiative aimed at reducing unemployment by providing people with the right career related information and Coaching.Yewande is passionate about People Development, Employability and Career Coaching. Through personal coaching, published articles and speaking engagements, she has helped hundreds of young professionals become more employable and gain employment.You can reach out to her by sending a mail to: info@careerlife.com.ng and follow her on Twitter and Instagram: @careerlifeng

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