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Propelled by the need to be there for my boys on their special days, especially birthdays which I was deprived of by my banking work schedule. I decided to start throwing a class party And the very first one I did was for my son who turned 5 in the month of january.

The beauty and joy of finally being there for them, made me put in the very best concept together to ensure he gets a wow celebration even though the budget was slim.

Most kids in his class were wow’d too and I deliberately put my business flier inside the goodie baags so their parents can contact me to replicate saame celebration for their children.

And it worked. Because I later got to know through their class teacher that parents were calling to find out what was special about nino’s class party that made their kids insist they want his kind of party. And thank God, his party was in january, I soon had client for the whole year calender starting with 2 in the month of february.

This particular event taught me a huge lesson. And thats because I goofed at delivering. It was for 2 clients, same school but 2 days apart.

I had hired a new vendor to make the birthday cakes a‎nd gave her the different dates for the celebrants.

She wanted to exceed my expectations and so she delivered the cakes 2days earlier just to convince me that she could do so.

You should have seen the disappointment on my face when I realised the problem that would cause since I didn’t have an appropriate storage for cakes ‎and I wasn’t knowledgeable enough to even tell how it can be preserved.

To make matters worse, she made a huge sized cake that didn’t even fit into my medium sized refrigerator and at that point I knew I was in for a lot of surprises. I gave her the feedback from my experience and what my fears were and She assured me that if I opened up the cake to natural air, ‎it will be preserved. I did as adviced and that only caused more damage, as ants found their way straight to the iced fondant on the cake and in no time, made it their play ground.

I couldn’t wait for the days to pass so I can deliver the cakes and conduct the class party.

The first was a huge success but the second was not and that’s because the celebrants mum noticed the cake was spoilt and was so agitated that it was delivered for small kids to eat.

She feared they were going to get sick had she not noticed the slimy effect on the knife she dipped into the cake to cut it. I apologized, took the blame, assumed responsibility by replacing with a better ‎cake few days later but the damage had been done and my client wasn’t pleased with what went down on her daughters birthday. Although she thanked me for going extra mile to replace the spoilt cake, she also adviced never to use unreliable vendors and suggested to me other bakers she has used in previous times. That meeting ended well with a new list of reliable vendors to my list.

Soon after that episode, I needed to regain some sort of confidence that I could still do well in this new venture I have chosen, I continued my daily bbm broadcast, advertising with excitement my events planning prowess. I even uploaded pictures on my social media page, telling my friends what we are capable of doing with a slim budget at esobevents, and the effect of the party on the child.

This pictures and post attracted a lot of parent who’s 9-5 schedule also deprived them of being there for their kids, or who couldn’t throw a large party because of minimal budget.

From sorting and packaging the children party packs, to the cake and their favourite carton character, i was soon becoming the “go to source” for a good quality children’s party.

From class parties, I was recommended for ‎house parties and later large children’s party because I wouldn’t stop talking about how good we are at handling that social aspect.

At one of such ‎parties, I would act as the Mc, dance with the kids, paint their faces and create activities just to manage the budget.

It was fun for me and I didn’t put to thoughts the energy involved . Most times,i’ll return home tired with only N5000 ($10) as my take home. Out of which I’ll have to pay some of my team members and also transportation which later leaves me with a profit of less the ($3) at the end of the day.

I landed my big break December same year when I ventured into packaging hampers for christmas and distributing it to corporate and high networth individuals, I submitted proposals through my network of friends and always drop my ‎contact card inside the parcel.

I went for a follow up of my proposals one day and in the midst of the meeting , my proposed client mentioned that he will like to celebrate his wife and needed someone who can put things in place for him. And I said that’s what I do as an events planner.

He told me what he wanted and sooner we were already on the planning and execution phase.

My ability to deliver exactly on the brief made me become their official events planner.

From surprise parties, to official meetings, corporate ‎seminars And lots more, i started gaining hands-on experiences and I was excited I was finally doing what I envisioned to do. I was so happy someone gave me a chance to serve and so I out did myself at every opportunity. Working over night to ensure all i’s are dotted and T’s crossed. Paying rapt attention to details and sometimes Sleeping at the venue to ensure workers don’t fail to do the work assigned to them.

Sometimes, I goofed because I didn’t understand pricing and so i’ll pay so much for the effort without a good knowledge of what payment structure was applicable to the service rendered.

By this time I was simultaneously running a course on entrepreneurial management and we were encouraged to use the services of our course mates.

This I tried and while some delivered, some start up used it as a way to reap money off me without delivering on the quality I expected.

This broke my heart and I decided i’ll never engage anyone if I’m not sure they can deliver on my expectations.

Having graduated with a certificate in entrepreneurial management, through the Goldman Sachs scholarship scheme for 10,000 women in Africa, I was paired up for mentorship with funke bucknor, who had that time was an already established events manager with several experience and top notch luxury events to her credit (including the presidents daughter’s wedding).

I ‎was privileged to be graduating with her on the same day but she couldn’t attend due to her busy schedule and so I kept giving her updates on the phone about the happenings at the hall of graduation, just to see if she could still meet up.

This act of kindness gave me closer access to her. I remember visiting her at the office to discuss some of the problems I have encountered and asking how she feels I could handle it.

Funke was ready to walk me through it and soon after I would attend conferences put together by EDC for people in my sector and i’ll learn more.

Often times, we meet up at this meetings with other events vendors and planners, and I started networking, and meeting reliable people in the industry.

In class, we will take on practical events case studies and plan to perfection with the brief given. This phase marked the beginning of a whole new level in my events planning and management career.

Later on in the following year, I set up a training arm of my events planning company, to share the knowledge I have acquired with other budding event managers and I leveraged on relationship to get experienced and leading events practitioners on board as ‎facilitators and they obliged. This include Funke Bucknor of Zaphire events, Olufunbi Akinyosoye of Dunamis events, to mention a few. They never charged for it and this kindness i’ll forever be grateful for because they showed up as scheduled and gave the students their very best.

It was a 3days eventful training and I used my experience in banking as well as my experience at other learning institutes to put together what I call a complete academy.

My mum had a vacant flat at her house and I pleaded to use the space for 3days before she rents it out to the final occupant, ‎she noticed my dedication and tenacity towards ensuring this training turns out a success and accorded me all necessary support.

I was allowed to use the space for free, and I sort the support and advice of my life coach who released his projector, and gave me some hands to support with logistics. We rented tables and chairs, printed training materials, bought generators and airconditioner to ensure we had a hitch free and conducive learning centre. Having completed the first 2days successfully, my mentor adviced that we take the 3rd day which is the graduation day to a more conducive facility and we ended up renting a hall in ikeja .

We projected 50 students but we had in attendance 12 students, 8 of which registered and 4 others attended free of charge. We didn’t make profit off this training but it gave room for impact, as I was also impacted and I used the medium to learn more and also train my staff/team member.

Today esob academy has broken even,we have graduated ‎several men and women. We now have a more structured classroom, and a detailed itinerary for field work, and practicals.

Esobevents on the other hand, now offers more than just class parties. We Plan,Style & Coordinate all types of
?corporate
?Weddings
?Social Events.
And we are willing and ready to Give you a “WoW+1” event experience. Call ? +2348023199887 ??

So if you’re considering the entrepreneurial journey just because you want quick money, think again. ‎Or your own desire to quit the 9-5 schedule is so you can have enough time to sleep and wake up anytime you like, Think again.

Entrepreneurship isn’t about being the Boss only, noooo, it comes with Huge responsibilities , dedication and most times a 24hours discipline. You are going to fail sometimes, loose customers or even get disappointed. But in all you’ll gain experience, win some and above all you’ll be fulfiled.

Still considering Entrepreneurship? RETHINK…..

And see you at the inspiring change conference 2017 on march 4,2017 by 10am at the Wisdom Arena.

I’ll be waiting to share with you more practical insight that can help ‎your entrepreneurial journey.

Admission is Free but registration is required. Click here ‎https://t.co/1KIBGekvhN

#InspiringchangewithSunmbo

Hello WORriors! Our Woman Crush for this week’s #WomanCrushWednesday is Iyabo Ojo. Iyabo Alice Ogunro-Ojo is a proud mother, businesswoman, actress, film maker, and philanthropist. She was born on 21 December 1977 in Lagos. She is from Abeokuta in Ogun State. She studied Estate Management at Lagos State Polytechnic.

She started acting in 1998 and made her debut in the movie, Satanic, an English-language film. In 2002, she made her Yoruba-language debut with Baba Darijiwon. She started producing her own films in 2004 and her first production was Bolutife. She has featured in over 150 movies and has produced over 14 movies of her own.

Iyabo Ojo launched her NGO, Pinkies Foundation, which caters to the children with special needs and the less privileged on May 2011. She is also the CEO of FESPRIS Production; and FesprisWorld;Spa, Salon,Mimi bouquet. She recently got unveiled as the brand ambassador of Larriett luxury shoes, alongside Monalisa Chinda.

Women Of Rubies celebrates you, dear Iyabo Ojo!

I do tell people that one of the most toxic, dangerous thing to do is to keep and nurse grudges. When you hold grudges against someone, you unconsciously become angry, bitter, and miserable…and from there, you proceed to looking for ways to make the person suffer (most especially when you see that the person is happy). Anger, bitterness, misery, grudges, unforgiving spirit, are all unnecessary baggages and you don’t need them in your life, so why don’t you throw them out!

I’m naturally a happy person so I hate any form of negative vibes around me. I don’t like dullness, bitterness, sadness, around me so I always try to make anywhere I am, lively. If you offend me, I will let you know straightaway(even if I have to ‘para’ for you) and if you don’t think the reasonable thing to do is to accept the fact that you have hurted my feelings and apologize, I would forgive you in my heart and forget about the whole drama because I can’t allow you to take my peace of mind and happiness away. People find it surprising the way I straighten people out(by mostly ‘para-ing’ for them) and within the next seconds, I’m back to my playful self with them. Whenever I’m asked how I easily switch like that, my response is always ”Life is too short, my happiness is important, and I can’t allow anything or anyone to block my blessings and happiness ke” If I have issues or disagreement with someone, I always look for ways to settle up and liven things up even if I’m right and the person is wrong. If I see that the person is being stiff and doesn’t want to settle up, I’d scoff and say ”wahala ti e ma niyen o..na you sabi” and move on with my life.

Do you know that when you keep grudges, you unconsiously block your blessings and happiness? Is anything or anyone worth losing your blessings and happiness, for? If you offend someone, what’s the big deal in apologizing to the person? Why wait for an apology before you can forgive? Sadly enough, some people find it hard and demeaning to say ‘sorry’. Some people gets ashamed when it comes to apologizing for being wrong. Don’t be like that. Don’t wait for someone to come and apologize to you before you can forgive. Don’t be proud or ashamed to apologize when you are wrong. Forgive and seek forgiveness for your own happiness and peace of mind. Even the Holy Books emphasize on the importance of letting go and forgiveness. There is one verse in the Bible that says ”Leave room for wrath but the sun must go down on your wrath” and the verse also clearly says that you must not take revenge but you should leave revenge for God. God knows that as human beings, we have emotions and so it is natural for us to get offended but we are not allowed to get too angry and we are not allowed to hold grudges. Trust me, I know how hard it is to let go and forgive, but you need to let go..it is very important. If you find it hard to forgive all on your own (you can’t even do it all on your own without God) talk to God in prayers and ask Him to help you..and He surely will help you.

I see people cursing, bad-mouthing, and causing problems for their exes, all because they dumped them. You don’t need that. Leave them to God and let Him handle them. I see people finding it hard to move on with their lives and learn to love again, because they are still smarting from the bad experiences they have had in their past relationships, and are finding it hard to forgive and forget…I say to you, it’s time to let go. Forget your past, bad experiences. Not every man/woman is going to be like your last partner. There is someone out there who is going to love you like you have never being loved before, and that person won’t be able to find you if you are still living in your past. Let go and let love find you!

Today, decide to throw out the unnecessary baggages you have been dragging around in your life. You don’t need them anymore because they are too heavy for your life and they are slowing your journey to a better, brighter place! It is time to throw out those unnecessary baggages, It is time to let go!

 

By Lydia Oladejo.

 

Facebook: Lydia Oladejo

Instagram: @lydiaoladejo

Email: lydiaoladejo@gmail.com

 

Last week I had loads of fun with the Old Girls’ Association of my secondary school. It was the maiden edition of our reunion and we were happy to see each other again. Of course we have changed, both in looks and sizes, but one thing was sure, we all have fond memories of our secondary school days. It was weird to realise that I graduated from secondary school exactly 20 years ago. There was so much to catch up on, and so much to gossip about. I am looking forward to the gathering again.

My school, St Joseph’s College Aba, was a very popular school and one of the best schools in our time. The standard of education and moral values were high. It also was also reputed to have the finest girls then, and as such our school activities always witnessed large turnout of male guests’ et al. We, the students, always represented that image with well-ironed short school uniforms and our heads held high.

I lived in boarding house and it was great fun. In fact, I learnt how to look out foe and take decisions for myself in the boarding house.I went into the boarding house young and naïve, but I came out sharp and street smart.

You see, lesbianism didn’t start today o. Oh no, even in Biblical times it has always existed. I, however, came to the knowledge of lesbianism in the boarding house. My school being an all-girls school was very much into lesbianism.

It was called ‘sure’ and the partners were referred to as lovers. Some school mothers and their school daughters turned their relationship from mentorship to lesbianism. It was a big deal then, and if as a junior student you didn’t have a lover you were deemed as being ‘jew’ – an unattractive and inactive person. I was initially curious to know what and how they did their ‘sure’ act, and when those who have experienced it narrated it to me, it just didn’t feel right to me. I believed intimacy was supposed to be between both sexes and not vice versa.

Anyway I kept my thoughts to myself and went about my business, no one wanted me as a ‘supe’. I was too stubborn to the seniors. I would flout school rules and regulations with my friend, and would be the first to report any senior that victimised or intimidated me to the principal – in well spoken English. God help the senior if she did not defend herself in English, as well as I did, the principal would show her pepper.

So, they all hated me and used every opportunity available to flog me. However in my JSS 3, I was almost lured into ‘supe’. It had become a norm amongst my friends, and I was almost the only one who didn’t have a lover.

One of the most beautiful and popular seniors in SS3 approached me after admiring my legs. I promised her I would think about it, because I had my reservations about her due to the rumours about her being possessed by evil spirits.

She persisted, buying me snacks during break, and making sure I ate the best portion of food during dinning hours.  Valentine’s day was approaching, so I decided to give the ‘supe’ thingy a trial. On Valentine’s Day, she sent me the biggest card I had ever seen and a set of lingerie. I was touched. Later that evening I honoured the invitation to her hostel, not knowing that I was going to sleep there. So when I entered the seniors’ hostel, I saw that all the bunk beds had been covered with mosquito nets and then bed sheets. There was practically no way to let air into the bed, I got scared because I can’t stay in a choked environment. She explained that the bed sheets were for privacy. I started wondering how I would breathe through the covering. I quickly lied to her that I hadn’t taken my bath because I thought that I would go back to sleep in my hostel. I begged her to let me go and freshen up and then come back. She agreed. I ran to my hostel and slept there.

She was very angry with me the next day. I apologised to her, promising to repeat the visit, while inwardly wondering how I would get myself out of the mess I was in. Fortunately for me, she woke up very early one morning and sat on the bare floor in front of her hostel. She refused to get up, claiming that she was instructed by her ‘people’ to stay there for the whole day, and indeed she stayed there even in the hot sun. My friends, the kain Ben Johnson wey I do. I ran faster than Usain Bolt and never contacted her again. I was more than relieved when she got another girl in my set as her ‘supe’ and forgot about me.

After that experience, I learnt never to allow myself be influenced by peer pressure or the need to belong. We can’t al  belong in the same place. Some can belong in the sitting room and some can belong in the kitchen.

You can share any tales about your secondary school as well….

So before I proceed with the usual banter that accompanies my vlogs, I guess I should say two things. The first is, Happy Valentine’s Day! May love always be in your life!

The second is a bit of a confession. Although this is a love/relationship styled vlog, I actually recorded it MONTHS ago but for some reason never released. And given we are smack bang in the season of love, it seemed appropriate to do so now.

This video is actually a sequel to an earlier vlog “How to make a Nigerian woman Happy” which you can watch here (link- https://youtu.be/WmFbOzo9snI). To create this video, I called quite a number of male friends and I was surprised by how simple and quite frankly ‘basic’ they claimed their requirements for happiness were.

 

As you watch this video, remember that every relationship is different because the people who make up these relationships, differ in backgrounds, character and many other things, so it is important to first understand your partner. It also always helpful to actually have an upfront conversation- ask him or her- what makes you happy? How can we both make our relationship, marriage or friendship a happy one?

So do you think you make your man happy? Please feel free to share some tips and tricks in the comments section or email me on glory@inspiredbyglory.com and if you haven’t done so already, please be sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel @inspiredbyglory. Catch ya later!

Thank you!

See you next week!

 

Ladies, you have been praying about your new relationship. You even chose to pray when he started misbehaving.

You asked God to show you signs if you should marry him or not.

Suddenly, his mild bad attitudes became worse. He even maltreat and abuse you more. He doesn’t respect you and doesn’t bother about your welfare.

You have been asking him what went wrong and he says nothing or talks down on you.

You have been fasting and praying more for greater signs and wonders and after every prayer, his attitudes become worse.

What else do you want?

Greater miracles? Unseen signs and wonders?

The problem is not that you can’t see the signs, you just expect a change because you’re deep in love. You are obsessed.

The love is not the problem, he is not the issue too, you just haven’t discovered who you are what you want and what you deserve.

You even think you don’t deserve better. You are so used to being abused and you have embraced it more. You keep projecting your insecurities but you think you are just a slaying Queen.

Take a look at your past and your present. Observe the patterns, notice the emotional instability and ask yourself questions that can preserve your future.

Don’t get carried away by the internet and it’s societal pressure of what a woman is.

Don’t read fashion magazines alone, read quality books too.

Your life is more than what you see now. You are a treasure waiting to be found.

Pause and seek within. You deserve more.

Don’t limit yourself to the experiences you have had with friends and men while growing up.
You need to sort out your issues and inner demon before it consumes you.

I know what it feels like to be insecure and have low self-esteem. It’s not a good pace to be. I know what it means to seek for validation from men and relationships but that’s not what you need yet. Let God fill your heart and give you a sense of purpose and essence. Work on your values and what you project. Talk to someone if it’s not doable by you.

Enough of nudity, promiscuity, abusive relationships and purposeless life.

It’s time for you to evolve.

We can connect on: adenikeadedokun@gmail.com if you need to talk about it.

The beautiful things about morning is that they largely determine the rest part of the day.  To keep that get-fit momentum going all day long, start your day off right with these morning habits that will motivate you even more.

GET SOME SUN

Basking in the sun’s rays can help you drop pounds. Why? Morning light helps regulate your internal clock, which aids your sleep schedule (crucial for weight loss). Morning sunshine also contains higher levels of blue light, which has the strongest effect on your circadian rhythm. You only need 20-30 minutes of morning sunlight between 8 a.m. and noon to get in on these benefits!

GET IN A MINDFUL MOOD

Mindfulness is a key strategy when it comes to weight loss. It’s all about taking a focused, intentional approach to your life by really tuning in to your body and mind. Even better, it can stabilize your emotions, potentially making you less likely to give into stress-based eating. Take a few minutes at the start of each day to sit quietly and focus on the rhythm of your breath.

CHANGE UP YOUR COMMUTE

Driving to work is easy, but it may not be best for your waistline. A study published in the journal BMJ shows that people who walk, bike, and take public transportation have lower BMIs and body-fat percentages than those who depended on their cars to get to work. Even walking to the closest bus stop or train station can be beneficial.

GO HIGH-PROTEIN

While the jury’s still out on whether breakfast is essential for weight loss, a healthy dose of protein in the morning looks like it can help you drop pounds. Protein takes a long time to digest and pushes your body to secrete the gut hormone Peptide YY, which helps increase feelings of fullness.

Photocredit : kokofeed.com

 

 

I grew up in a nice middle class home.

Growing up in a middle class family had its pros and cons.

The pros were:

  1. We had just enough to eat
  2. We had just enough clothes to wear
  3. We had a roof over our head
  4. We had a good enough school to attend
  5. We lived in a secure enough environment

In a country where over 70% of people live below one dollar a day, having those five things made you privileged!

I remember being driven around in my Dad’s staff car(official car in the military) and looking out of the window at the crowd in Oshodi(a busy area in Lagos) which was not so far from our home in Airforce base Ikeja and wondering why people had to go through so much stress to make a living….

Little did I know that some years later I would join that crowd as I made my way in life…

Which leads me to the cons:

  1. A false sense of security that made you want to stay safe and remain there forever.
  2. A fear of dreaming big and wanting more; you were already in the top 30% so what more could you want?
  3. Just enough became good enough!

One day I got fed up and told my sister that this was the curse of the middle class; just enough to keep you going, but never more than enough to give you the best life had to offer…

I wanted more!

My journey to searching for more led me through mountains, valleys, heart breaks and breakthroughs which mainly started to come when I developed a relationship with God and found my purpose.

6 years ago after a pseudo recovery from another heartache that life threw my way, I decided I was going to write a book!

For me, writing has always being therapeutic and the book was going to empower people to live their best lives and find their purpose.

5 years ago, I wrote a book with and about Mrs Tara Fela-Durotoye in what was supposed to be a series titled ‘The Empowering women series’. It was a great adventure, but distribution and awareness creation was a herculean task as social media had not opened up as it has now.

I shelved the series and kept on living my life and doing my work…..

I knew I was going to write again. About what, I did not know.

As my work as a business coach progressed, I thought it was logical that I wrote a book about how to grow a successful business. However, I began to remember how I felt all those years when I said to myself; there has to be more!

I started remembering the questions I was asked by several people about how to find their work that they could make into a profitable passion. It became clear to me that people were looking to find their niche.

I kept that in mind as something I would possibly write about to give people a practical guide to find their niche and turn it into a profitable passion.

However, I did not have a book title…..

Last year April, I began to feel restless, I had that same nagging feeling in my heart that there must be more, I realized once again that I was not living to my fullest potential.

I was letting fear rule again, the curse of the middle class was haunting me again…just enough was becoming good enough!

I took some time off to think, strategize and pray and one day, I woke up with a word in my heart; UPLEVEL!

I had never searched for that word before so I was curious. According to the urban dictionary, Uplevel means to grow in areas you have been previously stagnant.

I knew it was my word! I knew I had found my call to action! Most importantly, I had found my book title.

The other day, someone called me the Uplevel queen. I smiled because I realize one word has really made such a significant impact on my life and it is time for me to share it with the world.

The book is titled “Uplevel-find your niche, share your story, build your tribe and profit from your passion”.

My goal through the book is to take you on a journey to uplevel. I provide both inspiration and practical exercises that will guide you to find your niche, teach you how to craft a compelling story, show you how to build a tribe of raving fans and customers and then guide you to profit from you passion as you serve the world at your highest potential.

Uplevel is a call for you to raise your standards, to awaken that part of you that ‘life happened’ has shut down. It is also a practical guide to show you how to do this.

The book is slated to be officially available on the 6th of March 2017, however we have opened it for pre-orders for the next two weeks (13th to 28th of March) for people who want to enjoy the special privilege of getting it first at a discounted price and also get some special bonuses with it.

I will be doing free and exclusive uplevel book workshops in various cities in Nigeria. Our first workshop is slated for Sunday March 26th in Lagos and we already have some amazing brands partnering to make it an amazing experience.

If you pre-order the book, you will be on the priority sitting list.

I want to go on this journey with you to Uplevel and I want us to partner, if you are ready to start the journey, you can learn more, watch videos and pre-order your copy of the book at www.talealimi.com/uplevelbook.

It is your time to raise your standards and Uplevel!

Just in time for Valentine’s day, publicist, talent/brand manager and event producer, Lola Adamson shared her very relatable (yes! very relateable lol) list of things guys do or say that constantly piss women off in this new episode of her vlog; LolaUnflittered.

“Welcome to another unfiltered episode of Lola Unfiltered, Lol! On this episode, I talk about some things men say or do that annoy the women in their lives. Share your thoughts with us in the comment box below, let me know what your husband, boyfriend, friends or brother says to tick you off, Lol.