One sexual harassment (I have experienced quite a number) I will never forget was when the cussed man groped me in his office, right in the presence of another staff.

The queen of Ife, Olori Wuraola Zaynab Otiti Ogunwusi says that she will not rest until she has contributed her quota towards changing the way the African society views violence against women. The world class monarch and highest queen in South West Nigeria had recently shocked the world by marching on the streets of Lagos to condemn and raise awareness against the scourge of gender based violence and sexual abuse victimizing women in Africa. Her campaign called #1in3Africa was to be the first time ever a globally renowned monarch was to be involved in such a grassroots activism to fight a social malady that is fast growing to point of a pandemic.

Now she has revealed that this is the beginning of the struggle and anyone who views this act as horrendous should join in the eradication of this epidemic. The March in Port-Harcourt and in Abuja dates are yet to be disclosed. She also hopes that through this process will start a proceeding towards having a bill passed that will accord more protection for Nigerian women at the hands of potential abusers. She says her organization will set up help lines for women undergoing abuse to obtain help, create communication systems to create awareness against the crime and also employ other means such as counseling and rehabs to restore women who have suffered abuse. She also plans to drive for more arrests and prosecutions of more offenders.

In explaining her motivation for getting involved in such activism, Olori Wuraola said: “Many people have expressed shock that a queen will get involved in a street march of this nature. But then, that is the whole point! I have been so shocked by what I see the society turning into that I am left with no choice than to march in the streets to raise awareness against this malady, if that is what I have to do. People can be quick to condemn flimsy things without condemning injustice I run a foundation that cares for rural women. I have seen women who are so afraid of their husbands that they are afraid of coming out to receive economic empowerment, preferring to remain in abject poverty, rather than be subjected to battery by overbearing husbands, who want them to remain in subjugation. A man you should love and respect suddenly wants you to be scared of him. Marriage is partnership and that’s how it works. I find it so hard to believe that such a deep rooted evil in our society will be existing and people are going about as if nothing is going wrong!”

She is alarmed that society treats violence against women as “family matters” while thousands of young women are dying daily as a result of injuries inflicted by battering husbands and lovers. She believes that gender based violence and sexual abuse against women is a crime and should be treated as such.

According to her:  “The most troubling aspect of the whole issue is that these women suffer from a soul-deep emotional trauma and it robs them of their self-esteem, they become permanently damaged psychologically and they do not even know it. These women see themselves as undeserving of aspirations to a better life and future. And it impacts on their children who are conditioned to see themselves as inferior people, devoid of the right to ambitions!”

Olori wuraola strongly believes that emancipating women from domestic violence will free the real potentials of Africa and enable the innate human capacities that will take the continent to the next level to be unleashed. She advocates that economic empowerment of African women should begin with social emancipation of African women from Battery and abuse.

#1in 3 Africa campaign march took place on Friday 30th June 2017 at 10AM, from Falomo to Bar Beach across Akin AdesolaStreet in Lagos. It featured a large throng of women from all walks of life, with highly illuminating presence of celebrities among the crowd.

The march has had the support of a- list celebrities such as Ooni of Ife, Emir of Kano, Muhammad Sanusi II, Nollywood actors like Tonto Dikeh, Mercy Aigbe, Kate Henshaw, Ini Edo, Monalisa Chinda, Uche Jumbo, Funke Akindele, Adunni Ade, and Annie Idibia. Other celebrity partners include; Seyi Shay, Ndidi Obioha (Enthyst), HRH Queen Chika Acholonu, Onari Duke, Dare Art Alade, Ifeoma Williams, Yutee Rone, Toke Makinwa and many more.

We love amazing testimonies and Solara‘s (@yeetgod) is one of them. She remains strong and confident even after a tragic fire incident when she was two years old. But that didn’t just happen, she went through a lot of challenges and down times and she has decided to share her story with the world.

After several surgeries and procedures, Solara attempted to take her life at least four times, but she ended up coming out stronger. “I hated that I’m covered in scars but I slowly started to learn to love myself,” she said, adding “I’m a survivor.”

Solara | Photo Credit: Instagram – @yeetgod

A GoFundMe campaign has been set up to assist Solara with medical expenses. You can support her HERE.

Solara after the tragic incident

Read her story below:

I was born in Lebanon (a country in the Middle East) the accident was caused from an explosion, several people were injured and some were even killed. Of those killed my baby brother was one of them. I suffered third and fourth degree burns on 70% of my body, I was two years old at the time of the accident.

Doctors predicted that I’d only live 24 hours after the explosion but I survived and was put on life support. I was in a coma for 6 months after that. When I woke up I couldn’t hear, see or walk. I had several surgeries in Lebanon but I came to the U.S for more treatment and surgeries.

I’ve had dozens, maybe even a hundred procedures and surgeries. A large portion of my life was spent at the hospital and for a period of time during my childhood I couldn’t walk.

The first time I attempted suicide I was 12 and since then I attempted suicide 4 times, I didn’t want to live. I thought the world was against me. I had suffered so much pain and I just wanted it all to end. I was put on suicide watch at the adolescent psychiatric unit all 4 times with extensive counseling, it didn’t seem helpful at first but looking back I think it was.

I had extreme insecurities, I was insecure about my facial deformities. I was insecure because i have scars on the right side of my breast. I hated that I can’t use my right hand. I hated that I’m covered in scars but I slowly started to learn to love myself. I still very much have insecurities but I’m taking it one day at a time.

Beauty is a concept I have struggled with but I have a lot more confidence now than I did as a kid. I think I’m beautiful. My scars tell a story, they represent my strength and bravery. I’m constantly thinking of my brother who passed away, I think he’s my guardian angel, he is what keeps me going as well as my family, friends, and son. I am surrounded by love and happiness. I’m a survivor.

View this post on Instagram

Aww.. go Solara @yeetgod! ❤❤ Thank you for sharing your story. You can donate to support she and her family here: https://www.gofundme.com/help-solara-with-medical-expenses Video via @shalom_blac

A post shared by BellaNaija (@bellanaijaonline) on Jul 19, 2017 at 6:06am PDT

Source: Bellanaija.com

Hello WORriors! It’s #ThrowBackThursday and we are throwing back these adorable photos of OAP Tolu Oniru-Demuren, popularly known as Toolz!

Hello WORrior! Today is #WomanCrushWednesday and our Woman Crush is Arese Ugwu, the Smart Money Woman!

Arese Ugwu is the author of the bestselling and ground-breaking The Smart Money Woman, the financial-chick-lit novel that has taken Africa by storm. She is helping young Africans discover their power to build their future and make smarter money decisions through Smart Money Africa, a personal finance platform for the African millennial, engaging young Africans on the importance of financial literacy and the impact it has on helping them get money, keep money, and grow money.

Using the best of traditional and new media, Arese’s work appears in newspapers, on television, websites, social media, online videos, and through her book—all to reach her audience with accessible content that explains and navigates Africa’s unique financial landscape, delivering practical knowledge.

Her work in ensuring financial literacy for Africa’s youth has not gone unnoticed. In 2015 she was a finalist for Access Bank’s W Awards for Young Professional of the Year; in 2016, she won Rémy Martin’s Pacesetter award and was nominated for The Future Awards Africa Prize for Education.

She serves on several boards including House of Tara, and the Nigeria Higher Education Foundation as a non-executive director, and is also an associate member of WIMBIZ, serving on its planning committee since 2015.Arese also holds an MSc in Economic Development from University College London (UCL) and a BSc in Business and Management from Aston Business School, Birmingham. She is also an alumna of the of the Lagos Business School, INSEAD Abu Dhabi, and The London School of Business executive education programs.

Her other interests include, world travel, reading, playing tennis and squash.

Here are other interesting facts you might like about (In her words);

”I’m awesome!

Lol! just kidding

……….but I really am

I am passionate about my amazing daughter Zikora! Anyone who knows me (or follows me on instagram lol!) knows that my beautiful daughter is the centre of my universe.. My fear of being broke and hungry in adulthood multiplied after I had Her.She became my no 1 motivation to work harder and BE better because it is extremely important to me to provide a better life for her than my parents did for me. (and they provided a pretty great one)”

”I’m a bit obsessed with series! I will admit to pretending I’m Olivia pope from ‘Scandal‘  or  Jessica Pierson from ‘Suits’ when I know I have a tough day ahead to help me get through it! Don’t judge me! You probably channel them too on occasion ????”

”I’m a foodie! My love for food and my constant struggle to lose weight in the torture that is Jide’s ICU class is ermmm complex!”

”I LOVE my job!  Needless to say … I am a glorified slave to rich folk ( with a fancy title) lol! But I’m not complaining the experience I have gained in the course of serving my clients and their businesses is invaluable. I love working with an amazing team of analysts and stockbrokers to come up with financial solutions that meet their needs.”

Women Of Rubies celebrates you, smart Arese Ugwu!

Today’s employees are under more stress than ever before. A recent Harris Interactive poll found that one-third of workers ages 25 to 39 feel burned out by their jobs. Additionally, doctors are seeing more stress-related illnesses than ever before, including anxiety, depression, insomnia, adult ADHD, backache, and migraines. In fact, primary care physicians report that between 70% and 90% of patient office visits are precipitated by underlying emotional stress.

So what is causing all of this turmoil? Over the past 10 years businesses have become lean, mean machines by reducing personnel and increasing the workload on those who remain on the job. An increased workload forces the worker into multitasking, which may be effective for a short period of time, but over the long term, causes excessive stress.

In the business world, multitasking is a must-have skill for any employee, yet most workers feel they are being asked to do too many tasks. Why do we see this disconnect between the workday realities and the workers’ perception? Because people have never learned exactly how to multitask. That’s right, multitasking is a learned skill. By learning how to multitask efficiently, you can dramatically reduce your workday stress, increase your productivity, and enjoy your work once again.

The Keys to Multitasking Success
Contrary to popular belief, multitasking is not about “piling on the work” to the point of exhaustion. It’s about training the brain to channel energy in an efficient and effective manner so you can accomplish more in less time. And believe it or not, one of the hallmarks of learning to multitask is to actually slow down to accomplish more.

Following are some techniques that will help you mentally slow down so you can finally learn how to multitask and master this essential business skill.

Practice how to multitask
Whether you’re learning how to play the piano, use a computer program, or multitask, practice is essential to mastering the skill. Why? Because practice makes something seem routine, and when something is routine, it’s no longer stressful. Look at all the things you do in a day. Pick a few routine tasks to start with. As you master doing multiple routine things, then move on to slightly more difficult tasks. Gradually work up to the number of tasks you normally do.

During this process, remember that learning takes time. Very often people jump into a new role or responsibility without gradually gearing up their workload. Then they wonder why they feel stressed and can’t multitask effectively. So if you want to do all the things you do each day in a more efficient manner with less stress, take a step back and teach your body and mind how to work up to the productivity level you desire.

Know when a task requires undivided attention
Switching brain channels (focus) repeatedly actually reduces your memory recall. Think of your brain as a computer. If you are working within multiple programs and have numerous windows open on your screen so you can quickly jump from program to program, you may find that your computer has a higher tendency of locking up. That is, when you have fifteen windows open at once on your computer, and you attempt to pull up your word processing document, it’s not uncommon for your computer to run slowly or to totally freeze up, often causing you to lose all the data since your last “save.”

The same thing happens in your brain. When you’re performing multiple tasks that require your undivided attention, your brain gets overloaded, as it can only process information from one channel at a time. Therefore, do not multitask if the assignment requires your full attention. Once that urgent or detailed task is complete, then you can go back to doing the other tasks you normally do. This step will save you lots of rework, as you’re more prone to make mistakes when your brain is overloaded.

Use a tool to help you multitask
To avoid taxing your brain, write down items you can refer to quickly. For example, if you have a list of items you need to refer to often (such as pricing or shipping information or keyboard shortcuts) put the list next to your phone or computer for quick access. Not only will others think you are brilliant because of your amazing ability to rattle off information, but you won’t have to waste brain energy on such mundane information.

Allow your mind to reboot
Shift multitasking to single tasking throughout the day to allow your mind to reboot. The human brain uses more energy than any other part of the body. As such, it needs constant replenishment. Rest is one of the key components to increasing personal energy and productivity. So every two to three hours, stop multitasking and allow yourself to do just one thing for fifteen to twenty minutes. At the end of this rest period, you’ll feel refreshed, alert, and ready to tackle more tasks—and you’ll do so with fewer mistakes than if you plowed through your tasks without this re-boot period.

Take a brain break
Most employers offer their full-time staff a lunch break and two fifteen minute breaks throughout the day. Do you take yours? Most people do not, and as such, they’re not giving their mind a true break from the stresses of the day. Use break time to walk around the building, sit outside, or just close your eyes and meditate. Do whatever you like during these fifteen minutes to clear your head and give your brain a rest. If you really can’t afford a fifteen-minute break in your day, then turn off your mind as you walk to the water cooler or restroom. Give your mind some kind of total break from the workday tasks. To function at peak levels on a consistent basis, regular breaks are essential.

Do More with Less Stress
Multitasking is a part of our world. If you want to succeed, you need to learn how to multitask so it doesn’t overwhelm you and cause unnecessary stress. By simply slowing down and working up to the performance level you desire, you can multitask effectively and increase productivity. Simply put, learning how to maintain your highest level of mental functioning is your key to multitasking success.

credit: www.amanet.org

Sheryl Kara Sandberg was born in August 28, 1969 in Washington D.C, to a Jewish family. She is an American technology executive, activist, and author. She is the Chief Operating Officer (COO) of Facebook and founder of Leanin.org (also known as the Lean In Foundation). In June 2012, she was elected to the Board of Directors by the existing board members, thus becoming the first woman to serve on Facebook’s board. Before she joined Facebook as its COO, Sandberg was Vice President of global online sales and operations at Google, and was involved in launching Google’s philanthropic arm Google.org. Before Google, Sandberg served as Chief of Staff for United States Secretary of the Treasury Lawrence Summers.

Sheryl’s family moved to North Miami Beach, Florida, when she was 2 years old. She attended North Miami Beach High School, where she was “always at the top of her class”, and graduated ninth in her class with a 4.646 grade point average. She was sophomore class president, became a member of the National Honor Society, and was on the senior class executive board. She taught aerobics in the 1980s while in high school.

In 1987, Sandberg enrolled at Harvard College. She graduated in 1991 summa cum laude Phi Beta Kappa with a bachelor’s degree in economics and was awarded the John H. Williams Prize for the top graduating student in economics. While at Harvard, she co-founded an organization called Women in Economics and Government. She met then-professor Larry Summers, who became her mentor and thesis adviser. Summers recruited her to be his research assistant at the World Bank where she worked for approximately one year on health projects in India dealing with leprosy, AIDS, and blindness.

In 1993, she enrolled at Harvard Business School and in 1995 she earned her MBA with highest distinction. In her first year of business school, she earned a fellowship.

In 2012, she was named in the Time 100, an annual list of the 100 Most Influential People In The World according to Time magazine. As of June 2015, Sandberg is reported to be worth over US$1 billion, due to her stock holdings in Facebook and other companies.

After graduating from business school in the spring of 1995, Sandberg worked as a Management Consultant for McKinsey & Company for approximately one year (1995-1996). From 1996 to 2001 she again worked for Larry Summers, who was then serving as the United States Secretary of the Treasury under President Bill Clinton. Sandberg assisted in the Treasury’s work on forgiving debt in the developing world during the Asian financial crisis.

When the Republicans gained the US Presidency in November 2000, Sandberg left her job. She then moved to Silicon Valley in 2001 and joined Google Inc., serving as its Vice President of Global Online Sales and Operations from November 2001 to March 2008. She was responsible for online sales of Google’s advertising and publishing products as well as for sales operations of Google’s consumer products and Google Book Search.

In late 2007, Mark Zuckerberg, co-founder and chief executive of Facebook, met Sandberg at a Christmas party held by Dan Rosensweig. Zuckerberg had no formal search for a COO, but thought of Sandberg as “a perfect fit” for this role. In March 2008, Facebook announced hiring Sandberg away from Google for the role of COO.

After joining the company, Sandberg quickly began trying to figure out how to make Facebook profitable. Before she joined, the company was “primarily interested in building a really cool site; profits, they assumed, would follow.” By late spring, Facebook’s leadership had agreed to rely on advertising, “with the ads discreetly presented”; by 2010, Facebook became profitable. According to Facebook, she oversees the firm’s business operations including sales, marketing, business development, human resources, public policy, and communications.

In 2012 she became the eighth member (and the first woman) of Facebook’s board of directors.

In April 2014, it was reported that Sandberg had sold over half of her shares in Facebook since the company went public. At the time of Facebook’s IPO she held approximately 41 million shares in the company; after several rounds of sales she is left with around 17.2 million shares, a 0.5% stake in the company, worth about $1 billion.

In 2009 Sandberg was named to the board of The Walt Disney Company. She also serves on the boards of Women for Women International, the Center for Global Development and V-Day. She was previously a board member of Starbucks with a $280,000 annual salary, Brookings Institution and Ad Council.

She released her first book, Lean In: Women, Women, Work, and the Will to Lead, co-authored by Nell Scovell and published by Knopf on March 11, 2013. It is about business leadership and development, issues with the lack of women in government and business leadership positions, and feminism. As of the fall of 2013, the book sold more than one million copies and was on top of the bestseller lists since its launch.

Sheryl Sandberg has been ranked one of the 50 “Most Powerful Women in Business” by Fortune Magazine:

On the list of 50 “Women to Watch” by The Wall Street Journal. Sandberg was named one of the “25 Most Influential People on the Web” by Business Week in 2009. She has been listed as one of the world’s 100 most powerful women by Forbes. In 2014, Sandberg was listed as ninth, just behind Michelle Obama.

In 2012, Newsweek and The Daily Beast released their first “Digital Power Index”, a list of the 100 most significant people in the digital world that year (plus 10 additional “Lifetime Achievement” winners), and she was ranked #3 in the “Evangelists” category.

In 2012, she was named in Time 100, an annual list of the 100 most influential people in the world assembled by Times.

Her book, Lean In was shortlisted for the Financial Times and Goldman Sachs Business Book of the Year Award(2013).

During my service year, I worked at a District Hospital. It was one drama to the other everyday, and I got to learn that the hardest people to deal with are people residing in the rural areas.

On a fateful morning as I prepared for my CDS I heard a knock on my door. I opened up to see a young girl standing outside.

Yes?”

“Are you the Corper that works in the lab?” she asked.

“Yes I am”
“Please I want to run a test it is urgent.”

“I don’t work in the morning, it’s my CDS and I am late.” I said

Please help it is very urgent. I need an urgent PT test.

I decided to run the test and it was positive. I rendered my usual congratulations to her.

As I locked the lab, a motorcycle parked in front of it and a young man got off it.

He spoke to the girl before he approached me. I told him the nature of the result and congratulated him. He asked for an audience with me in private.

“Corper please don’t be angry I want to ask you something” He said in Igbo.

He narrated how he had only met the girl last week and this week she said she was pregnant for him. I almost laughed, but due to professional courtesy I asked if he was sure of what he was saying. I called the girl and she didn’t refute his statement.

With all this back and forth going on, my second boss came to work and I keyed him into what was going on. He questioned the girl and she said yes she met him last week and he slept with her without protection. We asked her if she had any other sexual partner she said no.

My boss flared up at this time and threatened to call the guy if she doesn’t say the truth. She finally admitted to getting pregnant for a ‘small boy’ as she called it. According to him, he was unfit to be a father, and she thought it was only ideal to say it belongs to this one.

I was completely ashamed of the girl and her morals. We called the guy and she confessed in front of him. The guy wasn’t even bothered, he just thanked us, because he knew it could not be possible – but maybe because the girl thought that since he was a motorcycle rider and illiterate, he had no common sense. He told the girl she was on her own and sped off.

This wasn’t the first time something similar has happened at the hospital.
Some voice out their doubts, some simply carry the good news. Some don’t even need to question if it is theirs.

In cases where a child’s blood group don’t match the parents’  during urgent transfusion, we waive it… because it is not a definitive answer or a determining factor. It is also not our business professionally, so we tell them to buy blood – ruling that they are unfit for donation.

You see, in this life, men do a lot of things that make you question if they killed their humanity switch. They could cheat, lie, break your heart to a hundred pieces, but in all these, most of them take responsibility for their actions.
Women, on the other hand, do a lot of unspeakable things; this is why the need for a DNA test has been red flagged.

If a man questions something, stalling only proves his doubt. Sometimes it is okay to let them have their way, and if in the end there is nothing to hide, he will feel guilty for not trusting you.

Trust is 100% vital in relationships, so if he questions the paternity of his children, it is only normal as a woman to be angry for his mistrust; but as long as you have nothing to hide, let him do it. It is his money, and at the end… his guilt to deal with – when he is proved wrong.

Nothing is as important as your peace of mind. Dragging it further will only create a rift.

In a family where the two parties understand and trust each other completely, are sincere to each other, love themselves regardless and put each other first, the issue of a DNA test will never arise.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime| Scott Griessel

About Vanessa Onyema

Writer, Illustrator and a lover of the arts.
Creative Director of The Reine Series
http://www.thereineseries.com

Source: Bellanaija

A warrior’s story needs to be told over and over, far and wide. It is the story of survival against the tide of pain, medical bills, and the emotional upheaval of living with sickle cell.

Wana Udobang‘s latest series tells the story of sickle cell warriors. Warriors is an interview series that takes an in-depth look into the lives and experiences of people living with Sickle Cell disease,” Wana Udobang says.

This episode features Greg Emuze, who shared his story of strength and determination.

“It wasn’t exactly easy to say you have sickle cell,” he said, adding that to him, the bane of the disease is having to lose time meant for other things during a crisis.

He said: “Sickle cell pain can be really terrible and could go on for a while.”

WATCH: