Esther Ijewere

In Inspiration July 9, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Ife Durosinmi-Etti – The Amazon Helping Women Win At Life

Ife Durosinmi-Etti is an author, entrepreneur and a sales and marketing expert with over a decade experience across fashion, marketing and manufacturing industries.

She holds a bachelor’s degree in Biochemistry from Covenant University, Nigeria, and an MBA in Global Business from Coventry University.

Ife started her career as an operations analyst in a bank in Nigeria during her mandatory one-year National Youth Service.

She volunteered with the British Red Cross at the time she was completing her MBA and joined a British multinational retailing company headquartered in London.

She moved back to Nigeria in 2012 and joined Nigerian Breweries (Heineken Operating Company in Nigeria) as a Young African Talent (YAT) and transitioned to their Corporate Communications Department as Corporate Social Responsibility and Sustainability Support Manager.

In 2015, Ife decided to bridge a gap in the furniture market for newborns and together with Olamide Olatunbosun, founded Parliamo Bambini, a baby and child furniture company with products manufactured locally.

In 2016, Parliamo Bambini was selected by the Tony Elumelu Foundation for its Tony Elumelu Entrepreneurship Program as one of the companies whose idea can transform Africa.

Parliamo Bambini is also the winner of the Jumia Super Startup Competition in 2017 In the same year, Ife was also selected as a Global Shaper of the World Economic Forum.

She has been selected as a mentor on one of Young African Leaderships Initiative (YALI)’s programmes and has been a panelist at Harvard University’s African Development Conference discussing the role of women in democracy and how it impacts on business in Africa.

Ife is the author of “Accessing Grants for Startups,” a book that shows the opportunities available locally and internationally for entrepreneurs in Africa that can help take their businesses to the next level.

Ife is also an associate member of the Advertising Practitioners Council of Nigeria (APCON).

Ife is also one of the Leading Ladies Africa’s 100 Most Inspiring Women in Nigeria for 2019.

Ife, alongside her AGS tribe also raised N22M for Late Olamide Alli Kid’s.

We celebrate her for giving women a voice and helping them win at life.

In Inspiration July 10, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Meet Omotade Alalade, The Woman Supporting Families Through Their Fertility Journey

Omotola Alalade is the founder of Beibei Haven Foundation – a non-profit supporting women and couples through their fertility journey. The organisation focuses on providing support to couples dealing with infertility, pregnancy/baby loss and genotype challenges.

A lot of families, especially young couples battle with fertility issues, and sometimes, the journey can feel very lonely. Omotade experienced this too in the early years of her marriage: infertility, genotype challenges, miscarriages and a complicated pregnancy. She was devastated, overwhelmed and isolated as she went through numerous fertility challenges. She was living in fear of being judged by what she was going through and unable to find adequate support to help her through.

In addition to her fertility challenges, financial difficulties also played a major role as they could not afford the necessary treatments and had to get a loan. For the first 2 years of her marriage, she was constantly working to pay for fertility treatments.

She decided to do something by founding Beibei Haven Foundation to stand by married women in similar situations, giving them assurance that they are not alone and all hope is not lost.

Beibei Haven provides free fertility treatment grants to low income earners (these treatments include In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) and surgical operations; provides support, information and education; creates awareness on fertility challenges through its fertility walks and pregnancy/baby loss summits; and promotes equal access to fertility treatments.

Through Beibei Haven, Omotade raises funds from private individuals and organizations to enable the foundation give free fertility treatments to those who cannot afford it.

Omotade is also the co-founder of Elev8 Media, an outdoor advertising company in Lagos, Nigeria, and was director in the company up until 2016 when she started Beibei Haven.

In 2016, Omotade was named in BBC’s “100 Women List” and in 2017, she was named one of the 100 Most Inspiring Women in Nigeria in celebration of International Women’s Day by Y! Naija and Leading Ladies Africa.

We celebrate Omotade for rising above her challenges and setting up a platform to help other women and families do same.

Source: Bellanaija

In Career Gems July 8, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Wevvo Nigeria, Arese Ugwu Set To Organise Financial Literacy Virtual Workshop For Single Mums

Financial literacy is essential to anyone, and for women responsible for providing for their children and families, the skill of making, managing and growing wealth is fundamental. One of the common threads of most single female breadwinners (single mothers) is that they live in survival mode. When society continues to portray women responsible for their families as struggling, broke and always needy, it is not farfetched for women to begin to believe these narratives and live into it, but it does not have to be so.

Therefore, Wevvo Nigeria has partnered with the founder of Smart Money Africa and Author of “The smart money woman” and “The smart money tribe”; Arese Ugwu to educate single moms on financial literacy and savings culture.

According to the founder of Wevvo Nigeria Weyinmi Eribo; “We believe that it is possible to live parallel lives of caring for the family while attaining financial freedom, hence our reason for partnering with Arese Ugwu to share her knowledge in this regard. I founded Wevvo because I know that women struggle in many ways, and for single female breadwinners it is worse, a full circle of negligence and lack of appreciation for the struggles we go through. I have seen several times how narratives have put women in boxes, this single story continues to create gaps in women’s’ careers and businesses. At Wevvo, we are changing this narrative.

Wevvo Nigeria is a resource and community-based platform that supports single female breadwinners with access to finance, business capacity boosting trainings and workshops, mentoring and a community to thrive, a safe space for healing and growth, learn more about our work and join the community.

Join us on the 18th of July in a zoom event where we will be learning money tips, asking questions, and sharing experiences unique to single female breadwinners.

Visit us at www.wevvo.ng

In Inspiration July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

American Express Names First Black Woman To Executive Committee In 170 Year History

Another win for Black women!

Corporate finance giant American Express just appointed the first Black woman to its executive committee in the company’s 170 year history, Black Enterprise reports.

Glenda McNeal is an AMEX veteran who has been with the company for more than 30 years. Currently, McNeal serves as President of Strategic Partnerships for the financial giant, leading strategy and negotiations for various partnerships that span the e-commerce, travel, technology, and retail sectors. Prior to that she worked in a number of capacities including sales and client management, business development, and marketing and strategy, spearheading efforts with key clients for AMEX including Delta, Marriott, Hilton, PayPal and Amazon.

A Wharton School alum, McNeal has an extensive resume which includes serving on several boards including Nordstrom Inc., RLJ Lodging Trust, the World Travel and Tourism Council, and the United Negro College Fund. She also recently led the “Stand for Small coalition,” an initiative focused on helping small businesses navigating the financial impact of the COVID-19 pandemic. As a new member of the executive committee, McNeal will bring all of her expertise to the table to help push the company forward.

Stephen J. Squeri, AMEX Chairman and CEO spoke about McNeal’s appointment, saying, “Having Glenda’s expertise and experience on the Executive Committee will be a huge asset for us. [The current economic challenges are] making it even more important to adapt our leadership structure to the challenges we face so that we can emerge in a stronger position. We must ensure we have the right expertise at the table.”

McNeal joins fellow appointees Andres Espinosa, Chief Credit Officer for American Express, and Pierric Beckert, President of Global Network Services. “[The appointees will] bring to the Executive Committee invaluable knowledge and experience which are particularly relevant for the times we are in. We will benefit from their diverse perspectives as we navigate through the challenges we face and position our company to win going forward,” Squeri said.

Congratulations Glenda!!

In Career Gems July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Startup Owned By Black Woman CEO Acquired By Amazon For $1.2 Billion

Amazon just acquired Zoox, a self-driving startup company, run by Black female CEO Aicha Evans, for $1.2 Billion, Black Enterprise reports.

Zoox is the maker of self-driving vehicles built for purpose that also happen to be eco-friendly. Since 2014, the company has been testing these autonomous vehicles in Las Vegas and San Francisco, with most referring to them as a “robotaxi” service. For the last two years , Evans has been at the helm, working as CEO to help the company expand. Now, Amazon, a longstanding investor in various self-driving startups, has acquired the company for over $1 billion.

“This acquisition solidifies Zoox’s impact on the autonomous driving industry. We have made great strides with our purpose-built approach to safe, autonomous mobility, and our exceptionally talented team working every day to realize that vision. We now have an even greater opportunity to realize a fully autonomous future,” Evans said.

The online retail giant plans to use the technology to tackle last-mile deliveries, officially automating ground delivery and revolutionizing the industry. Chief Safety Innovation Officer at Zoox, Mark Rosekind, spoke about the possibilities of the partnership, saying, “We now have an even greater opportunity to realize a fully autonomous future. We’re going to start seeing [in] three to five years where people start actually deploying in cities, but it’s going to be 20 to 30 years before you start seeing this all over the place.”

Evans will help spearhead the initiative, continuing to lead in her current role as CEO.

Congratulations Aicha!

In self development July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Wunmi Adelusi: Here’s How To Leverage Your Personality For Growth

What is that thing you do effortlessly? What do people keep coming to you for? Which area is your opinion most sought? Are you the go-to person when it comes to party planning/gathering people together/ starting conversation?

For the longest time, I thought and believed my personality could be a hindrance to my career growth. I lived that myth out for a while before I realised that my personality was mine to harness and leverage on. We have allowed the phrase “this is how I am” dictate to us what we can get out of our environment. Well, that ends now!

Research shows that your personality – whatever type that might be – can be your greatest asset if you just understand how to use it to your best advantage.

There are two broad personality types: the extrovert and the introvert.

An extrovert is known to derive his/her energy from being around people. Most times, they are externally stimulated, love talking, and sometimes forget when to stop. They are usually very sociable and can use their natural friendly nature and confidence to create rapport for effective team building.

An introvert, on the flip side, feels drained when surrounded by a lot of people. They love their me-time and their space, they can be reserved, and often not the best talkers. So they get to channel most of their energy into observing their environment, listening, reading, and writing – basically things that allow them express themselves when alone.

Recently, a friend of mine did an Instagram poll that showed that extroverts have more mentors/sponsors than introverts do. Now, I strongly feel the personality is not precisely what holds us back from putting ourselves out there, instead it is the thought of how bad we could be if we try. And my question is, why not?

I have observed that not everyone who has remarkable career growth or visibility is an extrovert. Somehow, these people have just mastered the art over time, and if we don’t, we could hate on these people for a really long time.

So how can you leverage your personality for growth without losing your authenticity?

Self-awareness

You cannot address what you don’t know, so you need to, first, identify your personality. Who are you? How best do you like to express yourself? In fact, a quick way to this is to take a personality test. There are numerous tests out there, a google search would help.

Identify and maximise your strengths

Your strength looks best on you because it is yours. What is that thing you do effortlessly? What do people keep coming to you for? Which area is your opinion most sought? Are you the go-to person when it comes to party planning/gathering people together/ starting conversation?

That is a pointer to what you can forge within your organisation. You could start with showing up for volunteering opportunities. For an introvert like me, it could be doing peer reviews for your colleagues. Don’t let what people say stop you from owning your strength.

Be consistent with your unique selling point

The best way to master an art and get the result is to be consistent. That is how that thing can be your trademark. People who suddenly seem to be known in this age are those who have been consistent with their craft, whether people watched or not.

So when your favourite supervisor is not the one championing that extracurricular activity at work, would you still volunteer? Do you give your best to writing reports to the boss as well as sending a mail to your subordinate?

Being consistent requires discipline – discipline to say ‘no’ or ‘yes’ as occasion demands.

Recognise when to step out of your comfort zone.

Because each personality is most comfortable in its area of strength, we can get lost there, that is why it is crucial to know when to step out of that zone. As an extrovert, you should know when to stop talking and give others the chance to do so.

As an introvert, you should know when to speak up, particularly when you attend meetings. That is when to brace up and say something from your reservoir of knowledge gained from observing, listening, or reading. That’s when to showcase that you understand all that’s been said, even if its just reiterating someone else’s point. Even when it requires you to do more work, no one gets recognised by doing only their job description, be willing to do extra.

How have you been leveraging your personality type in the workplace?

About Wunmi

Wunmi is an experienced finance specialist with outstanding academic and professional achievements. She is a mom of two boys. Currently, she works in the Financial Services Industry. Spurred by the desire to inspire young professionals, she started an online community of millennial employees where she shares relevant information aimed at building, empowering, inspiring, supporting and promoting employees to thrive in their careers.

In Career Gems July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Bozoma Saint John Named Chief Marketing Officer At Netflix, Making Her Their First Black C-Level Executive

Netflix named Bozoma “Boz” Saint John as their new Chief Marketing Officer, making her the company’s first Black C-Suite executive, Bloomberg reports.

Saint John is one of the most sought after marketing executives in her industry, boasting a 20 year career spanning multiple sectors. The marketing guru is coming over to Netflix from sports and entertainment giant Endeavor. Before that, she was Head of Global Consumer Marketing at Apple Music and prior to that, she worked with Pepsi-Cola North America as head of the Music and Entertainment Marketing Group.

Netflix Chief Content Officer Ted Sarandos spoke to Deadline about Saint John’s appointment, saying, “Bozoma Saint John is an exceptional marketer who understands how to drive conversations around popular culture better than almost anyone. As we bring more great stories to our members around the world, she’ll define and lead our next exciting phase of creativity and connection with consumers.”

The online streaming company has been working behind the scenes to bolster inclusion, committing $100 million to Black banks and figuring out ways to diversify their workforce which as of now, is just 7% Black. Saint John said she hopes that she can help to forge a new path at Netflix.

“I’m thrilled to join Netflix, especially at a time when storytelling is critical to our global, societal well-being. I feel honored to contribute my experience to an already dynamic legacy, and to continue driving engagement in the future,” Saint John said.

Congratulations Boz!!

Source: Becuaseofthemwecan

In Inspiration July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Esther Ijewere :12 Things Mentally Strong Women Don’t Do

Mentally strong women have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do…

1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves

Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.

2. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.

3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change

Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.

4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control

You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.

5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.

6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks

They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.

7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past

Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.

8.They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over

Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.

9. They Don’t Give Away Their Power

They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.

10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure

Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.

11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time

Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.

12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything

Mentally strong people don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.

In self development July 7, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Wuraola Ademola-Shanu: You Need a Social Media Detox! Yes, You!

If you feel like social media has taken over your life, if it preoccupies your mind, or if you find yourself constantly and habitually reaching for your phone, these might be signs that it’s time for a break.

Technology was meant to serve us. We create things, like social media, to make our lives better so we can have more control over the limited amount of time we have every day. But is social media actually improving our lives? Or have we become slaves to our own creation?

How often do you reach for the phone first thing in the morning and check your Twitter notifications? How often when you’re on vacation are you more concerned about taking the perfect Instagram picture than enjoying yourself? How often are you locked in an internet argument on Facebook? A social media detox gives us a bit of clarity into this.

The amount of mental energy we give our phones, specifically social media, could be put to much better use.

Social media, in its inception, was harmless fun. Now, it has evolved to be part of our daily lives. It’s how we consume most of our information, and it influences everything from elections to public discourse.

But social media is not real life. As much influence, or seeming influence, it has, it’s a curated and selective sample of what’s actually going on in the world.

What Is a Social Media Detox?

A social media detox is a conscious elimination of social media use and consumption for a set period of time. Generally, most social media detoxes are 30 days, but some people do 7 days or even a year-long social media detox.

Why Take a Social Media Detox?

If you’re here or you’ve been thinking about taking some time off of social media, you should probably do it, and that should be reason enough.

How to Do a Proper Social Media Detox

Tell people

The first step to taking a social media detox is to tell people.

Tell people you interact the most with that you’ll be offline for a while. This will do a few things.

First, it will keep you accountable. If you’re back within a few days Tweeting or posting photos, the people you told will hopefully call you out on it. This will help you stick with the detox.

Secondly, it will let people know you haven’t disappeared if you wind up sticking with it. Most people won’t really care, and some may not even notice (don’t take it personally!).

Delete the apps and block the websites

The next step is to delete the social media apps from your mobile devices, especially your phone. This step is required. I can almost guarantee you that you will not succeed if you keep the apps on your phone during the detox, or you try to rationalize to yourself that you’ll only check them once a week.

For this to work, you’ll need to disconnect completely. If that seems too hard (or even impossible), try a shorter detox.

You may also want to install an app or tool on your computer that can block out social media websites for you.

Plan what you will do during your detox

The last step is to plan what you will do during your detox and actually fill your time with the things you plan to do.

You may wind up surprised at how much time you’ll find during the day that you otherwise would have occupied with your social media habit.

If possible, try to replace your social media habit with something that doesn’t involve technology. I suggest this because using your phone or laptop to replace a digital habit isn’t really productive.

Some suggestions include:

Reading
Spending time with friends and family
Learning something new (language, hobby, skill)
Working on a side project or business
Exercising, gym, yoga
Meditating and practising mindfulness

But if you need to replace your digital habit with a more productive digital habit, here are a few suggestions:

Download Kindle on your phone and read books during downtime/boredom instead of looking at social media
Listen to podcasts or audiobooks
Write
Take an online course
You can sneak in some bingeing on Netflix.

Benefits of A Social Media Detox

It breaks the social comparison cycle

For example, if everyone you know is getting married and having babies but you’re still single, you may end up feeling isolated and lonely. This can even lead to serious depression for some people. Break away from this unhealthy cycle by taking a break from social media so that you can reconnect with all of the awesome things in your life.

You’ll stop feeling competitive

Even if you aren’t aware of it, social media brings out your competitive side. Each reaction and comment is a measure of how popular a particular post is, which can make you strive to outdo others and even yourself.

This type of competitiveness is not healthy, and it can cause anxiety and depression. Take a mental health break by stepping away from social media for a while!

It’ll improve your overall mood

The amount of time you spend on these sites is directly related to whether or not you feel stressed out or happy.

In other words, if you’ve been feeling highly anxious, stressed out or depressed, this is a good time to take a social media detox. It may feel weird at first, but your overall mood should begin to improve as you stay away from Facebook, Twitter and other social media sites.

You’ll reconnect with the real world

Sadly, people who spend a lot of time on social media sites report feeling lonely and isolated in real life. They are also more likely to suffer from a weakened immune system.

The good news is that even if you’re an introvert and uncomfortable with a lot of in-person interaction, you can boost your mood by simply going out in public. Take yourself to your favourite park or restaurant if you prefer to be alone. You could even go to a movie or concert.

You’ll stop obsessing over your past

Leaving social media behind for a while can give you the space you need to stop obsessing and actually move on with your life. Make sure that when you do return to social media that you take the extra step of blocking exes or anyone else who it pains you to see online. You can also tweak your Facebook memories to remove certain items so that you stop being reminded of them.

The first step to a successful social media detox is merely trying it. Even if you’re hesitant or unsure if you can do it, try it for a weekend. See how you feel after 2 or 3 consecutive days of being off of social media.

Like how you feel? Try a week and slowly progress to a full month.

About Wuraola

Wuraola Ademola-Shanu is a copywriter, content creator and content strategist who help professionals, consultants and business owners align their stories with their ideal clients, refine their sales funnels and expand their online reputations. She is also a proofreader. You can connect with her via her IG page @thecopywritingchic

Content source: Bellanaija

In Inspiration July 6, 2020 By Esther Ijewere

Olabisi Animashaun: A Girl’s Dream Guy Checklist

This is for the ladies! I may not be qualified to talk about relationships since I’ve never been married, neither have I been into many relationships to write extensively about this, but I would like to share my brief knowledge from my experience and hope you find it helpful.

I know every girl has a “checklist” for her dream guy. The “these-are-what-I-want-to-see-in-my-guy” list. I’m sure you are wondering how I know this. Well, that’s because I used to have one too.

A few years back, I was sitting with my friends, discussing random things, and the topic we ladies tend to discuss a lot came up. Yeah, you know that topic; who we would love to spend the rest of our lives with; our dream guy and the qualities he must possess. I recall one of my friends saying her dream guy must be tall, dark, handsome, have biceps to die for, and a lovely accent. Another had said her own dream guy should not be too tall because she isn’t really a tall person, he must have a nice set of teeth, a lovely smile, keeps a low cut, and have sexy dimple! Imagine the sight! He must also listen to everything she says, does everything she asks, must not get angry or argue with her. Hmm… he must really be a dummy.

A year before then, before I knew better, my checklist for my dream guy had been; the guy must be charming, have an amazing fashion sense, dimples to die for, keeps his hair or better still rock a dread, treats me like I’m priceless, takes me on trips, must be fun-loving etc. Please, do not get me wrong. Do note that all these are not bad. A girl deserves these things. She should at least dream. You know, have a set standard and all. She deserves to be treated like the Queen she is. But, she need to also know that it goes way beyond that. It’s way more than just the physical. Maybe at first sight, well yeah! Those are important. They may be what attracts you to your partner at first; but what happens later?

A year before then, I was thinking exactly like my friends. Our checklist for our dream guys does not include the most important qualities like; being a believer, loves and respects God, respects his elders, respects me, be caring, hardworking and purposeful, humble etc. Do our visions align? Do we have spiritual synergy? Do we share similar beliefs? We had only focused on the physical attributes which would only last for a while; the things that do not really matter. We have forgotten that such a man is dangerous if he doesn’t have a relationship with his Creator. We had only based our lists on the looks.

A man with a nice smile, sexy accent, wealthy, dangerously handsome, and all other qualities sounds fictive. Oh, we’ve seen too many fairytale movies. I would give that to Kdramas most of us were addicted to (I still watch sometimes though). Even if there is such a person, he would turn out to be a cheat. Humans have the tendency of being unfaithful especially when they do not have a relationship with God. Most humans still are unfaithful to God, so who are humans not to be cheated on?

Many of you may not agree with my point of view, but, I know for sure that having a checklist and sticking by it is a limitation. A checklist may be a guide initially, at least to point you towards your taste, but insisting on sticking by it limits you from seeing the possibility of that fantastic guy that is just around the corner which God has specially created for you. In fact, you may be seeing him every day at your workplace or school but you just have never thought of the possibility of you guys being together; why? Because your mind is fixed on the qualities your dream guy must possess.

Most women of marriageable age are still single, and others are in wrong relationships and marriages because they’ve spent their time looking for their special guy, not God’s choice for them. Others just jump into any proposal because of the fear of being ridiculed, being called bewitched due to their ages. Their God-given man had thought he could not stand a chance with their checklist and had gone for a lady on his own level.

I also think that a good relationship shouldn’t involve people of the same qualities. That relationship would be too dry. The world would be a boring place if people were the same. I know we all want exciting relationships and the better way of having that is marrying someone who is different from you, you have different likes, hobbies, and all. That way, you would be able to help each other and also try out new things. See another side of life. Imagine eating the same kind of food every day of your life, isn’t that boring? Imagine a life where he doesn’t have to disagree with your opinion even when you bring up a foolish one, he readily agrees with everything you suggest. Babe, that guy has no sense of his own. He only follows you foolishly, he’ll end up being your slave to your whims and thoughts, and you won’t get better ideas either. The little differences you have would make your relationship fun. His flaws should amuse you and there should be a quality of his that is annoying yet, attractive. Like what you both talk and laugh about, not what you laugh at. He shouldn’t be your stereotype. He should be his own person, unique.

In case you’re wondering about my own checklist, I gave up on it. I gave my life to Christ and then I realized He is so concerned about all that concerns me, even my relationship. I gave my checklist to Him and told him I would accept whoever He gives to me. The best and perfect gifts come from God. Do you want to have a good relationship? Have a relationship with God first, then you have that guy already!

Written by: Idris – Animashaun Olabisi

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