Women of Rubies
Tag

WORrior

Browsing
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| “I USE PROFIT MADE FROM SELLING AKARA TO GIVE MY CHILDREN GOOD EDUCATION”

A true mother is one who sacrifices for her children, a caregiver who does whatever it takes to put a smile on the faces of her children. In a world where true motherhood is becoming a rarity, Mrs. Mary Amedigni is an exception.

Mary Amedigni is an “Akara seller” and mother of three, her second daughter Tonia is a member of the National Youths Service Corp who recently posted a picture of herself and her mum on social media. In the picture, she is dressed in the NYSC uniform while her mother cuddled up to her .The picture was taken on Lewis street in Lagos where she sells and it has since gone viral.

In this interview with Women of Rubies, Mrs. Amedigni shares her inspirational story. It will trigger your emotions.

The Beginning
The major motivation that made me start this business is basically for the wellbeing of my children. I started 16 years ago because I want the best for them. I want them to have the BEST education. I don’t want my children to lay behind among their peers. In order to achieve this, I sacrificed things like buying clothes, jewelries, going to parties and other earthy/material things to make sure the major profits of my business goes to securing the best future for my children, and also making them comfortable. My husband is an audio & visual technician. He also manages studio and camera coverage.Motivation
My children gives me joy the most, they are the real source of my joy and happiness especially when I see them shining. My children give me joy for many reasons, they are obedient and they listen to the various teaching I give to them.

Challenges
The challenges I face since I started till now is a bit terrible, from rivals, danfo drivers and conductors with the way they talk and behave , also the Incident of hot oil falling from fire. Recently when I went to the market wheelbarrow boys stole my goods and ran away. Come rain come sun I am always working, but thank God we don’t look like what we have been through and am so happy that my hardwork is not in vain.

Picture going viral
When my daughter told me the picture we took has spread I was really surprised and I was really happy.

Giving up
NO! Never have I felt like giving up, this business started very slow and unproductive but I never gave up. This is because despite the income then, I still had something to take care of my children, and this was enough motivation to carry on and not to give up.

Being a woman of Rubies
Being hardworking makes me a woman of rubies, because my hardwork paid for it and because of it two of my daughters are GRADUATES today. I am happy and privileged to be honored by an important organization, such as WOMEN OF RUBIES pray that everyone at the organization sow and reap the fruit of their handwork.

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| LARA KUDAYISI-EMERALDS, RELATIONSHIP EXPERT

“I Had A Child At 19 And 14 Heartbreaks Before I Met My Prince Charming

”Like a phoenix, Lara Kudayisi Emeralds is rising from the ashes of adversity and inspiring others to do so through her story. Her tale will inspire you to rise above your challenges no matter what life throws at you. Her dream is to help singles make the right decision before walking down the aisle. The pretty relationship counselor and matchmaking mistress had a child at 19, her heart was broken 14 times and and has had 15 abortions .Today, Lara is touching lives through her “Matchmaking Mistress” platform. When you meet Lara, you realize she doesn’t look like what she has been through. This is her story.

Meet Lara Kudayisi-Emerald

I am the Matchmaking Mistress. I help singles attract their dream partners and walk down the aisle in the shortest time possible. I do this via The Achieve Your Marriage Goal Plan, Help My Heart Skype Call and The Complete Singles Club among others

The Match Making Mistress Brand

It actually started with my Complete Singles Club. I realized that though the guys and ladies chat daily in a Whatsapp group and meet every month, yet relationships weren’t happening like everyone expected it to. I knew at that point that I needed to go an extra mile to help them.
I started matchmaking a few of them that were interested and things got better, and since then I discovered an industry that is untapped and decided to pioneer it.

Being a relationship expert

Apart from being a Matchmaking Mistress. I am also a Relationship Expert. I started doing that because of my journey to a happily ever after life. I had a child at 19, had 14 heartbreaks and 15 abortions. I was so messed up until I finally got married to my prince charming. I decided to help people find happiness without going through all I went through and that was birthed the relationship articles and coaching programmes.

Pain is what pushes me

I want to help people in the little way that I can. Pain is what pushes me. I want to help eradicate pain. A lot of people have miserable marriages and dysfunctional relationships. I have been through this so many times and it’s not a pleasant place to be in. I feel fulfilled when I see people that I help smile and feel better.

Giving up?

Oh Yes. So many times I feel like giving up especially when I wasn’t making money and I was pouring out my soul to help people especially when it’s the only thing that I do. If you don’t make money from your passion with time, you would get frustrated. I had to learn that lesson the hard way and make it a full time business that pays the bills

Other Projects

Our Complete Singles Academy is coming up soon. It’s an Academy that singles need to go through for Self Discovery and Mastery. A lot of single people don’t even know who they are or why they act the way they do. Some people were raped, molested or mistreated and broken when they were young. It has affected who they are and what they do. This has affected who they are or how they behave. It also affects how they date and who they date. When you are dysfunctional, you would attract dysfunctional people, because you attract who you are. Furthermore, we would run dating programs and Marriage Preparatory Classes. I am so driven to help repair singles before they get married. When people get married, it’s a lot more difficult to help them because another person is involved.

Challenges

People are skeptical to be match made. They have no idea what match making entails. In fact, some people felt it shows they are desperate or it meant they were slackers as a guy. They didn’t know that there’s no big deal in it. It’s just normal introduction of boy, girl like it was way back in history. I remember asking a girl if she preferred to have no one ask her out in ages or have me introduce different people to her until she finds a perfect fit. Of course she preferred the introductions. So the challenge is the ignorance in the society about Matchmaking.

It makes my work more complicated.

Future Project

Telling your story

In Public Speaking, you need to connect with the people you are speaking to and for people of this generation; you need to tell them your story. People don’t want to hear 5 or 7 steps, they want to hear how you handled the challenges you had, and how you were able to surmount it. They want to know that you were in their shoes, you felt their pain and now that you have come out unscathed, then you have the right to talk them. Not because you have read some books or read stuff on the Internet.

Being a woman of Rubies

The ability to want to help alleviate people’s pain. I love to eradicate people’s emotional trauma and lead them to a happily ever experience

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| ALEX OKOROJI: WOMEN WORK FIFTY TIMES HARDER TO GAIN RESPECT

Alex Okoroji is  a Nigerian actress, writer, TV Personality, Talk Radio Host, Speaker, Author, Self-help Mentor & Founder of THE NAKED MOVEMENT & THE NAKED BLISS ACADEMY. Alex went through a failed marriage and a series of traumatic relationships but she has come out stronger and is all for  self-empowerment and transformation. In this interview with WOR, she speaks on her passion, challenges women face in the entertainment industry, and how she combines her many interests.

Growing Up and The Love For Arts. I grew up in a creative household, my father being a performing musician and my mother being a fashion designer, made our house filled with a library of music, movies, books and fashion accessories. I remember one of My father’s first valentines gift to my mother was a mills and boons novel in the 1979…I think… And I found it in a pile of book clutter, 20 years ago and I kept it with me.

The truth is, I grew up surrounded by artists and attended several events and award ceremonies organised by my father. And as a child growing up, I was in my School’s Social Club. I was part of the atilogu dance troop, atiero, yoruba ; igbo cultural troops in primary school (my mother’s yellow fish eye wrapper was one of my favourite costumes) and I was the pink house March past queen.

In secondary school (FGGC Akure), I was a green house princess for our interhouse sport, a cup bearer, the only junior student in Drama Club, Music Club and Press Club all at the same time. I moved to back to my old school in Festac…And I represented my school in inter school debates…inter-lit dance offs. I was miming, choreographing, writing short stories, performing sequences, creating designs and entertaining my entire school. Despite graduating in the sciences. The Arts was where I had always truly belonged.

Discovering My Passion For Acting
After I saw Lauryn Hill in the musical – Sister Act in 1991. And a line Whoopi Goldberg said to her in the movie captured my heart. I knew when I looked into the mirror, the only person I saw starring back at me was an Artiste. And I could act, sing, write and do every creative thing I wanted to do.But the real light bulb moment came many years later, in 2005 when I mysteriously took part in the maiden edition of the Television Reality Show – Amstel Malta Box Office (AMBO). To go through all the amazing trainings; performance classes and to hear my coach RMD, say in an interview, that I would be one of the last females standing and to hear director, Jeta Amata talk about how captivating my eyes are in front of the camera. It was the boost I needed to follow through on my passion.

Other Projects and Activities
Well, my career has totally evolved over the years…And I myself has evolved as an Artiste into what I can now call an “Expressionist” – because I use different mediums of the Art to Express myself/talent whether in front of the Camera, On Radio or via my Writing. So apart from being an Actor, I am also a professional writer, (Screenplay, Songwriter, Poetry and Prose), I also write self-help articles on my personal blog www.AlexOkoroji.net.I’m also An Advocate for EXPRESSION and Multi-Platform Ambassador for Self Empowerment and Transformation – which is why I recently founded the virtual community – ALEX’S BLOG COMMUNITY (ABC) and The Naked Bliss Academy. A membership platform where individuals or groups can acquire new skills online, expand their minds and re-invent themselves.

Challenges of Being A Woman in The Entertainment Industry
We all know a woman has to work 50 times harder than a man, to truly earn her respect in the Entertainment industry. Even as a Creative Entrepreneur, there is a general prejudice that a woman probably only needs the fame and not the money…or that if a woman is building a significant brand, she must be giving sexual favours or will be open to giving sexual favours. And many will test you to see where you belong. Holding on to your values while being compared to other seemingly successful people without cutting corners, can be tough. And most times, your hard work, creative ideas, business sass and dedication is ridiculed by defining you simply based on how you look and who they think you know. That for me is a challenge.

Impact of Being the Daughter of ex PMAN president
Well, being the daughter of a man as accomplished as my father, has impacted me a lot personally… because I have learned great lessons from watching him manage his career ; his personal brand, I have also picked up similar habits as regards my working ethics ; values… And professionally, I have great antecedents, so people transfer the respect they have for my father to me. But it also creates a lot of pressure, because the expectations for me to live up to his incredible legacy, are high. Apparently, I have big shoes to fill. But I have chosen to wear my own shoes and leave my own prints on the sand of time.

Alex Okoroji

Alex Okoroji

Greatest Reward
The greatest reward has been connecting with global influences from around the world and having a global community of people who truly value and support my work.Last year, I was Spotlighted for ‘Consciousness Raiser’  by Award Winning American Author of the book “Once The Storm Is Over” and; Founder of Living Enlightened -NINA BINGHAM and Co-nominated by Popular, American Citizen’s Advocate – JOAN TREPPA. I was shocked even though they had both been former guests on my show, because it was totally unsolicited, especially living here in Africa and being appreciated for trying to use my platforms to empower others to be more Aware and; live an Authentic life. I was also featured for my writing, by a prestigious writing journal ‘RB Magazine’ as Blogger of the Month, last year. In 2009, Actress, Stella Damasus was nominated for a movie I wrote, at the African Movie Academy Awards (AMAA). That felt good. And yes, It’s feels good to be acknowledged, nominated even awarded. But nothing beats a personal Email or text written to me by a guest, listener, reader, fan or follower thanking me for impacting their lives. And I get these in droves everyday. That for me is the biggest reward. That people can reach out to you and give first person account of how you are positively influence their lives.

Managing The Different Facets of My Career
Honestly, I don’t know how I do it all. I guess God takes the credit. People ask me all the time, how I’m able to manage all my creative endeavours. I’m busy round the clock. I sleep just an average of 3 to 4 hours every day. But I guess a woman has got to do what a woman has to do. When you are passionate about what you do, you honestly never have to “work” a day in your life. I get overwhelmed because I wish there was more than 24 hours a day, but I love the challenge.

Interest in Politics
Honestly, I doubt I’m going to be running for any office in the future, I don’t exactly consider myself to be political, because I’m a little too straight forward, too open. And I know my kind of people find it a tad difficult to fit into a dysfunctional and ; chaotic system . But I have also learned never to say NEVER.My interest in politics right now is related to my incessant belief, that we all as citizens should be involved in the polity, conversations and actualization of policies that govern our community. And of course we need more women in government and in leadership positions to create parity in the system.

I am A Woman of Rubies
I’m a woman of rubies because I’m not ashamed to be Authentic. I’m not afraid to embrace myself as the imperfect jewel that I am. I’m a woman of rubies because I’m not afraid to EXPRESSIVE, confident in my own skin and proud to be a woman of purpose.

Final words
Well, I would just say that Expression is a sign of Strength, not weakness. It may sound like simple basics words. But as an Advocate who has witnessed the power of Expression, it is my responsibility to remind people not to be ashamed of who they are, what they are feeling or thinking…and that there is an immense power in your voice. When you speak, you become intentional by commanding all your desires into existence.You have a VOICE…Use it! Speak up! And keep speaking, even if your message echos… Stay speaking, until people have no choice but to finally LISTEN.

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| “LEARNING IS EQUIVALENT TO GROWING”- OLORISUPERGIRL

Olorisupergal remains one of the relevant and trend setting blogs among the multitudes of blogs currently running in Nigeria. Tosin Ajibade the founder of OSG is a dynamic woman whose love and passion for writing has led her to be among the highly respected bloggers in Nigeria. In this interview with Women of Rubies, she sheds light on her passion, her driving force and future goals.

Growing Up
Growing up for me was just like a regular average child. I had a strict dad who never seized to make me forget that the fear of a Nigerian father is the beginning of wisdom. I can categorically say that is why I love writing. My Dad would make us watch news even at out tender ages and write whatever you got from them. Back then, I had few friends because of my Dad, and that answers why I still have few friends. Obedience, sharing, patience, reading, writing was instilled in me.

Why I Went Into Blogging
It was purely passion. It started as a hobby before it grew into something a lot more serious. I really love to write. I started the blog with my personal contents and articles. I just thought to have my articles kept online and not to share them. It was more like my story book; whenever I write about anything, I just have them saved online. Well, as at then, social media was not what it is now.

My Driving Force
My driving force was and still remains the passion to write; then determination and most importantly focus as the experiences have been challenging. I have always told myself how important it is to stay focused despite all distractions.

Making Money from the Blog
Starting out was quite difficult. I have always known no good thing comes easy. At the initial stage, it wasn’t about the profit since I only wanted my articles stored online but as time went on I realized I could earn a living from it. When I finally made up my mind on doing business with my blog, getting advertise on the blog was not easy at all. I literally struggled for a long time but after those few years, things began to take shape.

The Greatest Lesson I’ve Learned in Six Years
For me, learning is equivalent to growing. I can’t say one lesson is greater than the other, for all I have learned, the values are equal. I have learned so many things in the past six years and I am still learning. Life itself is about learning, growing and getting better.

How I Built A Formidable Blog
It takes a lot of courage, focus and consistency to build a formidable blog lest you get knocked out. Managing a blog/website, creating the right content, driving traffic to the blog/website, pushing your brand out there isn’t easy. Since we give to receive, when we post contents out there, we expect comments and reactions. Anyways, it has been tough and with the competitions in the industry, nobody wants to be the dullard so we keep pushing with hard works.

Next Level for the Olori Supergal Brand
For the Olorisupergal brand, we are working on the second edition of the New Media Conference which is coming up very soon. The maiden edition held 27th May, 2015 at Terra Kulture with over 300 participants.

Also, we are working on the OSG Vitiligo campaign which is part of our CSR at Olorisupergal Limited. We realized a lot of campaigns focuses on awareness of all forms of cancers, rape, HIV/AIDS, STDs, etc which are really good but a few if not none talk about Vitiligo which is also an important campaign. We had the maiden edition last year June and created awareness about the skin disease on social media.

Challenges of Running OSG
First, the issue of internet services cannot be over emphasized. The networks sometimes can be very frustrating; you can have three different internet providers turned on with no signal at all. Secondly, you can run out of ideas for creating contents in a twinkle of an eye, and by that I mean creating fresh content and recreating old content. Also, merging trend follow-ups with the website schedules can be killing considering that you have to be on top of the game. Another thing is staffing. Many times people will say they would like to work and leave in few months/years after learning a few things. We are managing the hands we have and looking forward to employing more as the brand grows than what it is presently.

A Dynamic Woman of Rubies
Although I am worth more than rubies, but yes I remain dynamic, reflective, and object-oriented (which are the features of a ruby). I believe in hard work and I think that surpasses everything because in due time, the sweats will bring the smiles.
Final Words

For anybody in any field or line of business/industry, the key thing is to understand and appreciate your field. That someone else is getting it right doesn’t mean you can’t get it better.

From understanding, you can be able to tailor your own niche and discover your potentials and business strengths.
In summary, be yourself, surround yourself with good people, get viable mentors, find the balance between your work life and personal life, I had my own fair share of difficulty but I am proud to say I found a way to balance it.

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| ERELU BISI FAYEMI: I DON’T WHISPER ABOUT THE RIGHTS OF WOMEN, I SPEAK UP

Erelu Bisi Fayemi is a Gender and Development specialist, Social Entrepreneur, Policy Advocate, Writer, Business Woman, Wife and Mother. She has a BA (1984) and MA (1988) in History from the University of Ife, Nigeria (now Obafemi Awolowo University). She also received an MA in Gender and Society (1992) from Middlesex University, UK.

She spent many years working on women’s rights and development issues around the world before she returned to Nigeria in 2010 when her husband, Dr Kayode Fayemi, became Governor of Ekiti State. She is the recipient of the 2011 David Rockefeller Bridging Leadership award, one of the most prestigious awards in the field of Philanthropy. In 2011, Women Deliver named Mrs Fayemi as one of the top 100 people in the world working on women’s empowerment, and in 2012, she was named by New Africa Magazine as one of the 100 most influential Africans.

She is the author of ‘Speaking for Myself’: Perspectives on Social, Political and Feminist Activism (2013) and ‘Speaking above a Whisper’, (2013) an autobiography. She also co-edited ‘Voice, Power and Soul’, with Jessica Horn (2008) a compilation of images and stories of African Feminists. She is currently a UN Women Nigeria Goodwill Ambassador, and recently established abovewhispers.com, an online community for women.In this interview, she revals her journey of speaking up for the rights of women.

My driving force
I have indeed spent most of my adult life working on women’s rights issues. I worked for AMWA, an international African women’s organisation based in the UK from 1991-2001. During that time I established the African Women’s Leadership Institute which has supported at least 6,000 women leaders across Africa, including women in Nigeria. I left AMWA in 2001 to co-found the African Women’s Development Fund (AWDF), and to serve as the first CEO. AWDF is an Africa-wide grant-making foundation which strengthens women’s organizations across Africa with financial and capacity-building support. Over the past 15 years AWDF has funded over 2,000 women’s organisations in 42 African countries. I left AWDF in December 2010 after my husband, Dr Kayode Fayemi, became Governor of Ekiti State. What drives me is finding justice for women and an equitable society

Growing up
I was brought up in a loving and caring environment. My father was an Accountant and my mother was an entrepreneur. My father worked in senior positions in the Federal Civil Service, and he always told us that on the day of reckoning, he would never be found wanting. True to his word, at a time when there was a change of government in 1979, a lot of his colleagues were rounded up for involvement in one scam or the other, but he was untouched. I learnt the value of contentment from my father, discipline, the right to speak up and be heard, community service, and the fact that I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. From my mother I learnt generosity, solidarity with other women in need and negotiating skills.

Achievements when I served as the First Lady of Ekiti State
I focused on what I love doing, which is working for and with women. During the period that my husband was Governor, Ekiti became known for being a pace-setter State as far as promoting the rights of women is concerned. The 8 point Agenda which was the policy framework for Dr Kayode Fayemi’s administration included women’s empowerment and gender equality as one of the eight priority areas. This meant that Ekiti women did not need to beg to be included in policy processes. Through my efforts, there were a record number of women in the legislature, cabinet, and on boards and parastatals, as well as in the local government structures. In collaboration with state legislators, government officials and civil society partners, I led campaigns for the Gender Based Violence Prohibition Bill of 2011 and the Equal Opportunities Bill of 2013, both were signed into law by the Governor. I established the Ekiti Development Foundation which supported thousands of women, men and children across the state. Ekiti State became the first (and only State) in Nigeria to domesticate the National Gender Policy in October 2011. I was also able to advocate for the fast-tracking of the Family Court in Ekiti State, the establishment of a Multiple Births Trust Fund, as well as the establishment of a Social Inclusion Center for the rehabilitation of women in distress. It is a long list, but I will stop there.

Being the wife of a politician
The wife of a politician has to learn to be all things to all people. As I wrote in an essay last year, in honour of the late Mrs H.I.D Awolowo, about the role of political spouses, you are expected to be the main support system of your husband. You are a hostess, adviser, philanthropist, mobiliser, campaigner, counsellor, mediator, spiritual intercessor, the list is endless. The responsibilities draw on every mental, financial and emotional resource you have. I learnt to take everything in my stride and never complain, because I saw it as a duty and opportunity to serve. I always tell people that I consider myself to be a politician because I am concerned about the world around me and how decisions are made. Any woman married to a senior politician who tells you she is not a politician is in denial. The seemingly benign philanthropic activities that spouses of politicians engage in are all political strategies, and it is entirely legitimate. The level at which we engage might be different, I must admit I was very active politically, especially in policy advocacy.

There are no short cuts to success. You should be prepared to put in hard work to see results. Focus on the things that you love and inspire you. At a stage in your life, you might have to take on ‘survival work’ which is a job that you don’t really like doing, but it pays your bills. The moment you feel you are able to, move on to doing things that really excite you.

My Above Whispers Project
I have always wanted to run a story-telling project for African women. I have come across many amazing women and stories over the years, and people might not get to hear about them because are not rich or famous, yet they are powerful in their communities. I also noted that most of the content on our blogs and websites here in Nigeria is targeted at a young demographic. When women and men of my generation go online, we want to look at content which is relevant to us such as politics, entrepreneurship, financial security, health parenting and so on. I therefore decided to launch an online-platform that we could use to share information, news, stories and campaigns. I also want us to be able to use Above whispers to showcase the unique ways in which Africans engage in community service and philanthropy.

My Sisters Keeper’s Campaign
At Above whispers, we decided that we wanted to mark international women’s day differently. We wanted it to be about women celebrating other women. On March 8th,women around Nigeria, and in other African countries such as Kenya and Burundi, took part in the campaign through simple acts of kindness such as buying goods from market women without haggling, paying for the hair of another sister at a salon, giving gifts to or female colleagues, especially those junior to us, and so on. It was a phenomenal success online, considering the fact that we did not run an expensive corporate campaign. We have got very touching feedback about the campaign, and we will certainly run more like that.
On women living their dreams

Let me preface my response by saying that it is difficult to give advice on this because women are in different situations. However, as a general principle, I would advise young women who are not married yet to think carefully before they choose their husbands. A man should not just choose you as his wife after having met his own laid down criteria. You too need to have criteria for choosing a husband. Marriages flounder when one party has to minimize their own dreams in order to boost the ego of the other.

A marriage is a partnership. Have a clear understanding with your partner about the kind of life you will have together and what dreams you both have and how you will support each other. This way you build a marriage based on love, mutual respect and support. Responsibilities in the home can be negotiated so that you have time to pursue your interests. Sacrifices do have to be made at certain times; especially when there are young children, but there still should be a level of understanding that does not leave you bereft of your bearings in life.

Advice to women entrepreneurs
There are no short cuts to success. You should be prepared to put in hard work to see results. Focus on the things that you love and inspire you. At a stage in your life, you might have to take on ‘survival work’ which is a job that you don’t really like doing, but it pays your bills. The moment you feel you are able to, move on to doing things that really excite you. When you focus on something you are good at, your passion will shine through and it will encourage investors to support you because they can see you know what you are doing. No investor wants to back a failure, so when they see you are committed to success, you get their attention. Be professional in all your dealings, and cultivate good manners such as arriving in time for meetings, appropriate grooming and being polite.

Lessons life taught me
I have learnt to be grateful for all the opportunities I have had in life, considering what life is like for the average African woman. After every experience, positive or negative, I always ask myself ‘What have I learnt from this’? This habit of reflection enables me to work on things I need to change or simply, to cut my losses and move on. I do not encourage negative energy around me, and I do not take on the baggage of other people, when you do that, it weighs you down.

Women and nation building
I think that question should be how can women be better appreciated in nation building. Women have been contributing to nation building even before we became a nation. What we need is an appreciation of women as citizens with rights to lives of dignity and respect. We need to see women empowered economically, educated, present at decision-making tables and free from all forms of discrimination and abuse. Policy and legislative frameworks to promote women’s empowerment are key, that is why passing the Gender and Equal Opportunities Bill is imperative. We also need to see implementation of the National Gender Policy, as well as the laws and policies we have at State level.
What makes you a Woman of Rubies?
I speak up about the rights of women, well above a whisper.

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| THE TOLU SANGOSANYA STORY: I LIVED IN CONSTANT FEAR OF DYING

Tolulope Sangosanya suffered dyslexia as a child, which impinged on her self-esteem, making her believe she won’t amount to anything great in life. Her bitter life experiences and needs as a child inspired her to start the LOTS Charity Foundation. She studied Mass Communication at the Olabisi Onabanjo University in Ago-Iwoye, Ogun State. She is very driven, visionary and has a heart of gold. Today she is building a refuge within the refuse with her Lots Charity Foundation

Early Preparations

I had dyslexia as a child. I couldn’t read until I was 10. I had failed so bad in primary school so much that I wasn’t sure I was going to do well in secondary school let alone university. I couldn’t pronounce the word “The” at age 9. I didn’t know God was preparing me for what I do now. My grandfather taught me how to read English and Yoruba for 2hours daily for 2years. The strategy my grandfather used is what we still use at LOTS Resource Center today. We have used that strategy to teach children how to read and write according to their capacity not age.

The Ifa Priest Connection

My dad’s Ifa priest said I am a possessed and demonic. Several pastors said that too. The Ifa priest said I am a queen in the spiritual realm and my members wanted me back which meant I will have to physically die. I lived in constant fear of dying for over 5 years until an era came when I woke up and I said to myself: “I will not die twice. I will not be dead while living”. I decided to feed street kids every year for my birthday. What the fear of death did for me is to wake me up fast to the fact that life is actually short and its running out every minute. I wanted to make each day I live matter. To crown it all, up my roommate in university died at 22, I said if Awujola (who to me was better than I) could die, then who am I? After I started Project LOTS, the Ifa priest came back to say I’m not dying again, that there is a sign on my body that says the price has already been paid for. I realized I wasn’t a waste of God’s breath of life. I felt the fear of death was God’s ‘wake-up’ call to me and ever since then, I haven’t gone back to sleep.

Passion for Philanthropy

I didn’t go to school to be a social worker or a philanthropist. I thought I was going to have several businesses from fashion to photography .I tried most of the business while in the university, but nothing filled me up more than the fulfillment I felt, when I fed 300 children in 2006. I knew I was ‘Home’ when I got to DUSTBIN ESTATE in 2008. I remember ‘stealing’ my younger sister’s toy to give to another cousin whom I thought didn’t have. I was trying to redistribute ‘wealth’ even as a child. Nothing made me feel this will be my life’s mission. Discovering my life’s purpose was more like an accident, i can’t even claim glory for it.

Finding Balance

Lots of Things was registered as a business name before I got the idea for LOTS Charity Foundation. I’m an entrepreneur by nature; I bought and sold lots of things as an undergraduate. I needed an umbrella name to give to all I did. They were not related, hence the name L.O.T.S –Lots Of Things.

Tolu and some LOTS kids

When LOTS Charity Foundation came to be, I knew I had to raise funds for the initiative and I was too proud to ask anyone for help. So all I had made from the other things I did went into registration and into the first few event LOTS Charity Foundation organized. Since LOTS Charity Foundation commenced operation, Lots of Things declined a bit in operation .I could only focus on one thing per time. I am first a social entrepreneur before my entrepreneurial side comes to life. I ask myself, if I have 24 more hours to live what would I rather do? Make money or give money? Giving tops my chart every time

My Greatest Influence

I have had many people who have impacted my life. From my grandfather who taught me how to read to my biological father who rewarded me for everything, I excelled in. I also will mention Fela Durotoye who taught me to make my personal gifting to be used for national benefit. Professor Wale Omole gave me a life road map. There is nothing that I do today that professor didn’t know about 10years ago. He always said “Tolu, nothing must go to waste”. He taught me how to love me. Professor made sure I read two books weekly and we met to review the books. “Tolu, you have to decide to decide. This was one of his sayings that gave me constant headache and left me without sleep. We had 2 years of qualitative mentoring sessions and I cannot trade the lessons of that era for a billion naira.

Discovering Dustbin Estate

In 2007 after feeding 1000kids at Oko Baba on my 25th birthday, a spirit in me told me we would be going to Ajegunle next .I didn’t know my way there. I called Praise Fowowe who linked me up with Christopher who then took me to the place we now call Dustbin Estate. When I met with Christopher I told him to take me to the dirtiest place he’s ever seen. Till date, I still question why I thought of dirt. There is a spirit in every man that speaks and i am just blessed to be in tune with mine.

Tempted to Give Up

There have been several times I felt like giving up .Even as I type this, I feel like giving up. I am choleric by temperament; I like to have an idea of happenings around me. I hit my head every time it looks like something is out of my control. But this has taught me patience, a virtue I do not naturally have. I felt like giving up when some kids stole books at the library to sell, books I had bought when i was very ‘poor’ and ‘hungry’. I felt like giving up when i was busy looking for food for 150 families last December and at the same time dealing with the news that my mom had cancer. I felt like giving up when my personal account was dormant for 4years. I don’t give up easily on anything or anyone so I keep at it

The Reward for Philanthropy

When I learnt one of our students, Batis could now read, my joy knew no bounds. When Balogun Rufai’s (also one of our students) name came out 4th on the merit list of FUTA, I felt like a proud mother. Knowing that the dreams i conceived on the floor of my room in university is now seen by all makes me feel like my life isn’t a waste. I wake up with a smile on my face knowing that Tolulope Sangosanya has brought value and not disgrace to her family and to the society at large.
Nigerians are not giving enough

I don’t think we give enough, giving hasn’t been institutionalized, we do not have social security or welfare package in Nigeria. What we have is extended family security and even that now is beginning to fade. Now what we practice is “all man for himself, God for us all”. To love is to give and since we don’t love, most people cannot give. We are now ruled by greed and selfishness as we have sold value for money.

Final Words

All human being were created to come solve problems. The human race cannot be complete without you discovering your purpose and fulfilling it. Nobody was made to just come ‘occupy space’, we are all part of a body, hence collective responsibility. Nigeria needs us to rise and shine

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

I USE PROFITS MADE FROM FISH-SELLING TO SPONSOR MY CHILDREN’S EDUCATION-MRS EUNICE GODWIN, FISH -SELLER

 

A true mother is one who sacrifices for her children, a caregiver who does whatever it takes to put a smile on the faces of her children. In a world where true motherhood is becoming a rarity, Mrs Godwin is an exception

Mrs Godwin is a fish seller and the mother to Joseph, a member of the National Youths Service Corp who recently posted a picture of himself and his mum on social media. In the picture, he is dressed in the NYSC uniform while his mother puts on the NYSC face–cap.The picture was taken in the market where she sells fish. The picture got the attention of Yoruba actress, Toyin Aimakhu.She posted it on her social media platform and it has gone viral since then.

According to Toyin Aimakhu:” God will bless him and his mother. He is a son who will never forget the sacrifice his mother made for him”

In this interview with Women of Rubies, Mrs Godwin shares her inspirational story. It will trigger your emotions and probably make you cry.

The Beginning

My name is Eunice Godwin a fish- seller, she sells frozen and smoked fish. My husband works as a security guard. He lives in Kaduna South, Nassarawa. I gave birth to six children; two boys and four girls .I love my children a lot and would do whatever it takes to make sure they are successful. I was selling orange before but the business was not giving me what I needed to support my family and I started the fish business because I see it as a means to sponsor my children’s education. The fact that I make profit from this business gives me joy and makes me fulfilled,

Challenges

I am facing a lot of challenges in my business. Government workers are against people selling by the roadside and we are always in constant fear that they can show up at any time. Another challenge I face is that my neighbors complain that the smoke coming out from the fishes irritate them .I need a place I can be doing that because I sell smoked and fresh fishes, also most times there is no market and I have to bring the fish back home , these things sometimes want me to give up but I won’t.

READ ALSO : 12 Thing mentally strong women don’t do

Sustaining the business

As a result of the need to sponsor my children’s education, I put in my best and do everything within my power to sustain the business. The profit made is sent to my children in school. I used the profits made from selling fish to sponsor my child who is currently undertaking his national youth service and others who just gained admission. I have always dreamt of sponsoring my children to the university and this is already happening

Giving up

I sometimes feel like giving up on my business. I buy the fishes on credit and pay at the end of the day. Sometimes I am not able to pay all because I would need the money, to be sent to my son in school. This makes me owe the person who sold the fishes to me .I am still paying the debt because it is much

Viral picture

When my son told me the picture we took has spread I was really surprised. I didn’t really look beautiful in the picture. I am really happy for it. My son was used by God to make the picture go that far.

Advice to Mothers

Take care of your children and they will take care of you, seedtime and harvest time will not seize.

Being a Woman of Rubies

I see Proverbs31:10-31 as a reflection of the person God created me to be. This makes me a Woman of Rubies

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW | I WAS DEVASTATED WHEN THE DOCTOR TOLD ME MY DAUGHTER’S LEG WILL BE AMPUTATED-CRYSTAL CHIGBU, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR IREDE FOUNDATION

Crystal Chigbu was devastated when the doctor told her, amputation will be the available option for her daughter. It felt like her life had come to an end, she was distraught and discouraged. She and her husband decided to reframe the situation and make the best of it.This birthed The Irede Foundation, is an NGO focused on lending a hand of love, joy and hope to children living with limb loss knowing there are no limits to their potential.

The Beginning

My name is Crystal Chigbu, Founder and Executive director of The Irede Foundation. I am married to a gentle man fondly called Zubby. We are blessed with two children Beulah (girl) and Eden (boy). I am a “crazy “passionate person, believing there is nothing you set your mind to do that you cannot achieve I like to stand out from the crowd. I know disability is a mind game so I see more abilities in disabilities. I worked for a leading multi-national Fast Moving Consumer Goods (FMCG) company for over 12years and just recently resigned to work in the social space.I have interests in sustainable development with strong emphasis on economic and social empowerment of persons (specifically Children) with limb disabilities in Africa .My interests have led me to become actively involved in a number of NGOs as well as CSR initiatives focused on children and women.

The birth of Irede Foundation

My personal experience, birthing and raising a daughter with a missing tibia and knee cap inspired the creation of The IREDE Foundation. In addition to this was a desire to pour out my heart by writing out my daily frustrations and concerns as I managed my daughter. I wanted to share the comfort I had with other parents and the abilities in disabilities. The need to reach out with a message of hope to child amputees and families continually spurs me to action. We are out to educate and create awareness on amputation and limb loss reducing stigmatization to the barest minimum. We also have a support group to reach out to the families and the amputees. Thirdly, we empower amputees via provision of prostheses and mentoring.

My reaction

When the doctor told me my daughter’s leg would be amputated I was devastated. After a few minutes, I thought he must be out of his mind and then I became confused.I started asking questions. To say the least, it was indeed very devastating

Deciding to amputate her legs

The decision took about 2 years and 3 months to make. We (My husband and I) just could not come to terms with making the decision. We has to research and hoped that it didn’t have to come to amputation. I will leave you to imagine how difficult it was.

My daughter is amazing!

Beulah, my daughter is one of the strongest and determined human beings I know in my life. She is bold, daring competitive, loving and just so amazing. Let me tell you a little about our charming beauty, she gets to do everything she has determined to do. She is very active with sports and academics, within six months she learnt to swim excellently. She was once told by an older amputee that she wouldn’t look good without her prosthesis. Her response to her is with or without my prosthesis I am beautiful. Her energy is contagious, should you come in contact with her, you will literally love her.

Beulah and Irede Foundation

In trying to get a solution for Beulah, we realized that there was not much information around in Nigeria on this form of disability. We sought for support and it was literally unavailable. As we saw her transform daily into a child that does all things it became apparent that someone else can learn from us.

This contributed to the establishment of The Irede Foundation. This formed the basis of our day to day process which is to educate, to encourage and to empower. We wanted to create awareness on amputation for the society at large. A self-sufficient child despite the disability, is what I see daily in Beulah .This vision was translated into empowering others. We focus on mentoring the children and providing them with mobility aid. I want to see other children swim, dance, climb without any limitations of limb loss. These are the things I see daily in my daughter. At the Foundation, we offer the same hop

Challenges of running Irede Foundation

A number of challenges show up from time to time and by God’s grace we resolve and come to a place of learning as we fix them .One of the challenges we face is sourcing for the prostheses at an affordable price. Depending on the type of amputation, we do spend about one million naira (and with current exchange rate it’s even gone higher) on a prosthesis. We are working at sourcing locally for the materials used in fabrication of the prostheses as this will help us reach more children.

In order to reach more children and families with this message of hope, we need more sponsorships and collaborations.

Giving it all up?

Couple of times I felt like giving up. Sometimes it gets quite hectic and overwhelming that I do feel like packing it all up and doing something else. One example of when I’ve felt this way, was when I saw many children on queue to get prosthesis and we were not able to reach out to them immediately. In situations like this though, I remind myself of the 28 limbs and over 60 families that we have touched and the community. This encourages me and reminds me that I can’t give up now as we have gone too far from where we started from and we can and will make it.

Creating a balance between career and family

I am still learning balance every day and hope to continually get better at it as my children get older. My balance scheme is prioritization and support systems. I have learnt to prioritize my life, for me it’s my God, family, career and so on. When I am faced with any decisions or daily life’s challenges, I go in that order. Then I also take advantage of my support groups. My support group is my family, friends and the assistance I get from people. Each time I get overwhelmed, I re- evaluate my priorities and reach out to my support group again. That has worked for me from time to time.

Greatest reward

Hope renewed in the lives of our children is our greatest reward. When I hear the good news of how the children (Champions) are doing in school, see their smiles, families call in and just pray for me, it encourages me to do more. This is like receiving an award. Knowing that daily these children and their families’ lives are touched and improved daily makes me refreshed. I met a 16 year old amputee in January 2016, she had never walked all her life and she was quite a sad, depressed and unhappy teen. As I talked to her and got her to smile for the first time I felt good. The next time she came into the Irede office, she was all smiling as she fitted her first prosthesis ever. When I came in saw her, all I could do was give praise to God for the opportunity to touch lives.

My counsel to mothers

For mothers going through a similar ordeal, this is my advice, its okay to cry but after crying move on. Today, I want you to know there is hope for your child and for you. A distinguishing factor for children is the motherly support they get and also recognizing that fathers do play a major role too. I am encouraging you to be strong, get information about your child’s ordeal then get help. Often times you do not need to come up with fresh solutions. Someone somewhere has been through a similar ordeal and you can learn from them.

Final words

Being a woman is not a reason to be mediocre and dependent. Let’s stand up and join all the other women doing amazing things. Improve yourself, add value to your family, business, community and the nation at large. Women are blessed with multiple abilities. Do not accept the weaker vessel mentality. Get up and impact your immediate environment. See you at the top

by
Keep Reading
In Interviews&profile By

#INTERVIEW| NO MATTER HOW PASSIONATE YOU ARE, IF YOU ARE NOT MAKING MONEY, YOU WILL GET FRUSTRATED – MOFOLUSADE SONAIKE

Building Networks of Entrepreneurs
I have various projects I am working on, but the most recent ones are my upcoming show and coaching programme for mumpreneurs. Over the years, I have built a network of entrepreneurs, entrepreneur associations and regulators like NASME (National Association of Small and Medium Scale Enterprises), TIC (Technology Incubation Centre), FIIRO (Federal Institute of Industry and Research Oshodi), and EDC (Enterprise Development Centre), among others. As a result, I have a body of knowledge that I know entrepreneurs need in order to get ahead. I already get calls and requests from people looking to start businesses and I tell them, “Ask me anything. If I don’t know, I at least know someone who does.” I am building a structure around that, and it will all be housed on my new website, mumpreneur.ng, so entrepreneurs do not have to grope in the dark anymore.

Empowering Entrepreneurs
Although I have a background in engineering, I have always loved the expression of anything through art. In my third year at the University of Lagos, I got a few friends together and we formed a group called “Kolo Manifest.” Lol! We started presenting plays about the struggles of being engineering students at our year-end dinners and events. It was unprecedented. Engineers were expected to be a certain way, nerdy and serious mostly. I wasn’t. This is my third year as a Global Entrepreneurship Week partner of the Enterprise Development Centre. Last year, I teamed up with the Spirit of Enterprise to do a N50,000 challenge for upcoming entrepreneurs. This year, however, I decided to step away from the norm and do something different. Entrepreneurship is stressful enough; we are out there building capacity and learning every day. Let’s just hang out and learn differently. You are more likely to remember a lesson you got from a movie or play than from some lecture. So, the question is, why not a play?

The challenge being asked: what do you do?
My first major challenge was defining what exactly I was doing. I did everything and anything. I just had the passion to share, to express myself and tell my story. It took a while to really see where this was going. I would go for networking events and when people asked, “What do you do?” I would sigh and not know quite where to start! Lol. How do you deliver an elevator pitch when you don’t even know how to define what you do?Secondly, no matter how passionate you are, if you are not making money, you will get frustrated. So my second challenge was streamlining and monetising my projects and activities. I met an amazing strategist recently and we have built a winning team. Watch out! Hehe….

Balancing it all
Balancing the home front and work is not a one-time achievement. It’s a journey, a process that I improve on every single day. I have built a process that works for me. I also have an amazing support system in my husband, parents and siblings. I must mention my nanny here; she has been with me almost five years. I have a whole blog post dedicated to my search for a nanny and how hectic it was. I used to try to do everything myself. I still do sometimes, but the truth is, it is not sustainable. A typical day for many mumpreneurs I know here is from breakfast, to school run, to business run, to maybe second-leg school run, then lunch, then homework, then dinner, then work when the kids are asleep, sleep, wake up, repeat! No wonder many women look older than their husbands!

Being one of 50 game changers in Nigeria
I recently received an Xceptional Women’s Role Models award for my contribution to enterprise. I didn’t see that coming; it was a great surprise and encouragement that confirmed the value of my work. I also got listed as one of the top 50 game changers in Nigeria by the Keniisplace blog. Another reward that is priceless and cannot be quantified is the joy in an entrepreneur’s face when they find a solution through me for something they have been struggling with for a while. An example is when I introduced someone to the Technology Incubation Centre where she was able to finally sort out her NAFDAC registration.Advice to women
Find out what makes you happy and do it! It’s your life.

Being Exceptional
I think one of the greatest assets I have is my positivity, I don’t take life too seriously. As a result, I am always (well almost always) happy. When you are in a happy place, you are unstoppable.

by
Keep Reading