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#MONDAYMOTIVATION: HOW TO DEAL WITH PROCRASTINATION

I call this little strategy the “2–Minute Rule” and the goal is to make it easier for you to get started on the things you should be doing.

Here’s the deal…

Most of the tasks that you procrastinate on aren’t actually difficult to do — you have the talent and skills to accomplish them — you just avoid starting them for one reason or another.

The 2–Minute Rule overcomes procrastination and laziness by making it so easy to start taking action that you can’t say no.

There are two parts to the 2–Minute Rule…

Part 1 — If it takes less than two minutes, then do it now.

Part I comes from David Allen’s bestselling book, Getting Things Done.

It’s surprising how many things we put off that we could get done in two minutes or less. For example, washing your dishes immediately after your meal, tossing the laundry in the washing machine, taking out the garbage, cleaning up clutter, sending that email, and so on.

If a task takes less than two minutes to complete, then follow the rule and do it right now.

Part 2 — When you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do.

Can all of your goals be accomplished in less than two minutes? Obviously not.

But, every goal can be started in 2 minutes or less. And that’s the purpose behind this little rule.

It might sound like this strategy is too basic for your grand life goals, but I beg to differ. It works for any goal because of one simple reason: the physics of real life.

The Physics of Real Life

As Sir Isaac Newton taught us a long time ago, objects at rest tend to stay at rest and objects in motion tend to stay in motion. This is just as true for humans as it is for falling apples.

The 2–Minute Rule works for big goals as well as small goals because of the inertia of life. Once you start doing something, it’s easier to continue doing it. I love the 2–Minute Rule because it embraces the idea that all sorts of good things happen once you get started.

Want to become a better writer? Just write one sentence (2–Minute Rule), and you’ll often find yourself writing for an hour.

Want to eat healthier? Just eat one piece of fruit (2–Minute Rule), and you’ll often find yourself inspired to make a healthy salad as well.

Want to make reading a habit? Just read the first page of a new book (2–Minute Rule), and before you know it, the first three chapters have flown by.

Want to run three times a week? Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, just get your running shoes on and get out the door (2–Minute Rule), and you’ll end up putting mileage on your legs instead of popcorn in your stomach.

The most important part of any new habit is getting started — not just the first time, but each time. It’s not about performance, it’s about consistently taking action. In many ways, getting started is more important than succeeding. This is especially true in the beginning because there will be plenty of time to improve your performance later on.

The 2–Minute Rule isn’t about the results you achieve, but rather about the process of actually doing the work. It works really well for people who believe that the system is more important than the goal. The focus is on taking action and letting things flow from there.

Try It Now

I can’t guarantee whether or not the 2–Minute Rule will work for you. But, I can guarantee that it will never work if you never try it.

The problem with most articles you read, podcasts you listen to, or videos you watch is that you consume the information but never put it into practice.

I want this article to be different. I want you to actually use this information, right now.

What’s something you can do that will take you less than two minutes? Do it right now.

Anyone can spare the next 120 seconds. Use this time to get one thing done. Go.

 

 

credit: James Clear; www.jamesclear.com

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CHIMAMANDA ADICHIE’S BOOK ‘AMERICANAH’ RECOMMENDED AS ONE OF ‘THE BEST LOVE STORIES IN LITERATURE’ ON TODAY SHOW

Buzzfeed Books‘ founding editor, Isaac Fitzgerald has recommended Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s book, Americanah as one of “the best love stories in literature”.

Fitzgerald, who appeared recently on Today Show alongside author Jasmine Guillory, nominated Adichie’s work while selecting his four picks.

Each of the show’s attendees selected four books apiece, while presenter Savannah Guthrie added extra three picks.

Adichie’s work was recommended alongside Kazuo Ishiguro’s The Remains of the Day, Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte amongst others.

 

Credit: Bella Naija

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“YOU WILL NOT HEAL BY GOING BACK TO WHAT BROKE YOU” -DABOTA LAWSON

Beauty entrepreneur, Dabota Lawson in a post shared on her Instagram page, advised people with broken relationships not force it because of the pressures which Valentine’s day brings.

She wrote;

You will not heal by going back to what broke you . Don’t send that text and don’t make that call ,Love yourself and Ignore the pressure of today. Happy Valentine’s day

See more photos below.

 

 

 

Credit: LIB
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HOW TO STAY POSITIVE AFTER BREAKING UP

As you fall more and more in love, there’s a chance something will come along that sabotages this connection. Maybe it’s a communication issue, or something more serious, such as infidelity or family problems. No matter how hard the couple tries to salvage the relationship, it can still ultimately end in a breakup…and heartache.

Depending on why you and your love broke up, here are tips to feeling positive and as happy as possible after your relationship ends:

Breaking up because you’re incompatible

Many relationships end because the couple is not compatible in one or more ways. Maybe you want marriage but he doesn’t. Maybe he’s not willing to move for your work. Whatever the reason, coming to a point where you realize you both just aren’t compatible usually occurs after the infatuation stage starts to fade. You both realize that the kisses and handholding was really all there was to this relationship.

You’ll undoubtedly feel like breaking up was the best option, but you’ll still feel heartbroken. Here are ways to heal after breaking off an incompatible relationship:

Relax and realize the breakup is no one’s fault – some people are not meant to be together.

Make your life exciting again by getting back into your hobbies and interests (and finding new ones).

When friends or family ask about the relationship, don’t talk negatively about your former parter. Simply explain why you broke up, then change the subject.

It will take time to heal, but knowing that the relationship wouldn’t have worked anyway will help you feel positive.

Ending a miserable relationship

If the relationship is miserable, breaking up is the right thing to do. It can still take its toll on one or both people because it wasnt all bad. A miserable relationship can mean many things: maybe you need more independence or just can’t stand being around someone who is so negative.

Even if the relationship was miserable, there were parts that made you happy which will make the breakup tough. Be sure to do the following to heal after breaking off a miserable relationship:

Lean on family and friends and accept their kind words.

Avoid more misery by giving in or begging the other person to change.

Find a passion that will replace being miserable. Some people may enjoy volunteering and others may want to get a pet.

When infidelity ends a relationship

One of the most common causes of a breakup is because of infidelity. If one partner was unfaithful and the other has a difficult time forgiving, a breakup usually follows. The person who was unfaithful needs to take responsibility and figure out how to prevent this from happening again in future relationships. The person who remained faithful should learn from the experience without developing bitterness that will prevent a happy, loving relationship after taking time to heal.

Here are ways to stay positive after breaking off an unfaithful relationship:

Never take the blame for the other person being unfaithful. If there was a problem, it should have been discussed and not “solved” by seeking love outside the relationship.

Take stock of personal, positive attributes – learn to see the good in yourself.

Get support from counseling.

Build an ego without being too self-centered. This may involve taking a class and learning something new or getting a makeover.

Make (and achieve) personal and positive goals.

After a breakup, everyone needs time to heal. Whether the relationship ended because of incompatibility, being miserable or infidelity, it’s a good idea to focus on personal positives before getting involved in another relationship. Use these tips to help you heal, stay positive and move past your heartbreak.

Source: https://familyshare.com/27456/how-to-stay-positive-after-breaking-up

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NASILELE MUNYANDI: PITY PARTIES (MY KIND OF PARTY)

It was 5 o’clock in the morning of July in 2008,my good friend joy called me to inform me that acca had released results for our June sitting, and she was so excited because of all four papers we sat for ,she cleared all. I was so happy for her and at the same time, a great deal of anxiety filled my whole system. Lying on my bed I couldn’t wait for 8 o’clock so I could go to the nearest café and check for my results. That semester I sat for three papers and I cleared one only, I remember sitting in the internet café ,wondering what to do from that point, how I would break the news to my parents, how I would tell my friends I had failed when they all had cleared their exams.it tore me apart and pushed me into a kind of frustration that awarded me an opportunity to throw the biggest party ever, “the pity party”

I remember how for almost a month all I could do was wonder why me, I felt it was unfair because according to me, I had put in my very best and I deserved to clear, I shut out every possible help to pick myself up and think of the way forward, it was like no one understood what I was going through but myself, I looked at every one as though all they did was mock me and not see my frustration. For a moment I really felt I was entitled to all hurt and pain and everyone should let me enjoy it because it was my pain and hurt, no matter how long it took, I should be left alone in it.

Pity parties may seem ok, and the world knows a woman for hosting the best ones….hahahaha ,but truth be told, we are living in a time where invitations to a pity party are never accepted, cry it out, but wake up, dress up and start over, we live in times where we are constantly reminded that the world owes us nothing, hence when we fall, even on our faces, we need to find courage, and pace to move forward, for those that hurt or disappoint us, for  all those that betray us, not even when we feel we need the apology ,will it always come, what we need is to find a place within yourself to dust yourself up and rise up, push until your circumstance move. I recall receiving a call from a friend I least expected, and the question that made me put myself together and get back to the drawing board was, who do you expect to apologize for your failure? And who do you expect to make it right if you won’t own up and do the right thing???i remember their words often when I feel low or rather want to give up, i remember he said, the world owes you no apology nor sympathy, if you need change, there is still a great chance to study hard and make it, but if the music at your pity parties is enjoyable, know you will party yourself into failure and serious depression.

Ladies, we need to get out of our entitlement mode and be willing to put in the hard work, we need to stop expecting the world around us to always understand our plight, mediocrity is slowly being dealt   away with, and soon, not even

About Nasilele

Nasilele is a Zambian writer and account assistant with a reputable company in her home country.

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“A LOT OF RELATIONSHIPS HAVE DIED BECAUSE WE NOW HAVE BETTER RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR PHONES THAN WITH PEOPLE” -TOYIN ABRAHAM

Nollywood actress, Toyin Abraham described people in this century as a generation that don’t want a real relationship, in a thought provoking IG post.

According to her, social media has taken over true bonding and it has caused a lack of sincerity, betrayals and depressions.

She posted this picture below to emphasize her point, in which she wrote:

“21st Century, the generation that doesn’t want real relationship. We want that social media relationship that everyone can like and comment on. True bonding are very hard now because, we now converse via DM, Ping, WhatsApp etc and epistle is our new way of expressing our feelings or appreciating people.

A lot of relationship has died because we now have better relationship with our phones than with people. We invest more time into our Instagram profile than we do with our lives. We celebrate our friends/family’s birthdays without knowing how the 365 days that lead up to them was.

Family meetings are now been held via Video calls and WhatsApp group conversations. People come to social media to write a long epistle for eachother, claiming WORLD’S BEST for them. When in actual sense, they know they are nothing close to COMMUNITY’S BEST and their intentions are not to filter them as good, but to impress social media audience.

There’s no relationship without social media anymore and that’s why relationships are no longer sincere; everything is now for the gram😥. We’ve forgotten that, the best thing to hold on to in life is eachother👭 and that’s one of the reasons why depression is getting common☹️.

We’ve built a wall around ourselves against our family and love ones. We share our burdens with riddles on social media instead of talking it out with someone. It has worsen to the extent that, someone about to commit suicide will take to Instagram story to write their suicide note.

I understand it’s hard to find a trustworthy person these days but you still have to trust someone! If you trust them and they betrayed your trust, then it’s not your problem anymore it’s theirs. Let them live the rest of their life with the burden of betrayal.

The best place to lean on is eachother’s shoulders. Don’t let social media steal your love ones from you cuz NOTHING CAN SAVE US FROM DEATH BUT LOVE COULD AT LEAST SAVE US FROM LIFE”.

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OYIBO HOSANNA: WHY YOU NEED A DETOX

Either as a single or married woman, working class or full time wife, daily you are in contact with harmful organisms, and toxins that pose a threat to your wellbeing.

Detoxification is the cleansing and nourishing the body from the inside out, by removing and eliminating toxins, then feeding your body with healthy nutrients. Our body has a natural detoxification system that functions to clear these toxins, but you can increase its efficiency by timely nutritional and lifestyle changes.

These toxins are in your water, food, and the air you breathe; it’s tough trying to get away from them, but you can have a defense against them. They include metals, chemicals, pollutants, artificial food additives, pesticides, and herbicides.

SIGNS THAT YOUR BODY IS SCREAMING FOR A DETOX

  • You frequently feel tired and stressed.
  • You experience unexplained headaches, mental confusion and lack of enthusiasm.
  • You repetitively feel colds and contract infections.
  • You have puffy eyes and distress sleeping.
  • You’re not at your ideal weight and experience irregular menstrual cycle
  • You have allergic breakouts and blemishes.
  • You’re exposed to common environmental toxins via smokes, household chemicals (perfumes, shampoos, paints etc.
  • You consume a high amount of fried foods, fast and processed foods
  • You always have irregular stomach bloating, indigestion and difficulty in defecating.

If you experience any three or more signs above, a detox is surely needed.

WELLNESS CUES: HOW TO DETOX

Having known the signs to watch out for, don’t you think you owe it to yourself to purify your body? Here are wellness cues on how to cleanse, balance and energize your body.

  • Increase your Water Intake. Your body basal function is driven by water, hence you can see it as the most valuable tool for detoxifying your body; we are advised to consume a minimum of 3-5 liters of water daily to aid its detoxifying function. Water first in the morning and last at night.
  • Decide to Eat Rightly. Choose to eat freshly cooked meals with organic fruits and vegetables over processed, fast food, alcohol, coffee, cigarettes, refined sugars, and saturated fats.
  • Detoxifying your body is not only about what you avoid, but also about what you consume. Fasting and adding natural foods like fiber foods, garlic, vegetable stews, cabbage, lemon, bitter leaf, broccoli and drinking green tea is vital in detoxification.
  • Develop an exercise and meditation routine to help you sweat out, release toxins through your skin pores, improve your mental attitude positively and boost your body energy levels.
  • Keep the Environments Air Clean. You can’t control the air in the environment you move in, but you can control the air in your home to reduce the number of smoke fumes, mold, mildew, and other microorganisms that are dangerous to your health.
  • Visit a Spa. The use of natural green herbs, brushing and oiling of your skin helps your skin peel off old cells and dirt, unclog skin pores to allowing the skin to perspire freely, which in turn stimulates cellular rejuvenation and slows aging.
  • Body Detox Packs. There are nutritional packs that offer a complete body detox, it is a step-by-step process of drinking health products that focuses on cleansing organs of the excretory systems (lungs, colon, skin, liver, and kidneys) of harmful organisms, chemicals, and toxic metals. Consult your doctor before using any health detox packs.

BENEFITS OF DETOXIFYING

  • It protects you from disease and refuels your body to maintain optimum health
  • Helps your body organs rest through fasting
  • Promotes the ease of elimination of body wastes from the excretory system.
  • Improves blood flow and mental alertness.
  • It provides your body with healthy nutrients that protect against free radicals, strengthening the immune system.

The source of many health problems is the toxins that have built up in our bodies over the years; to stay healthy and enjoy total wellbeing, DETOX.

About Hosanna

I am Hosanna Oyibo, a Public Health Coach. I am an avid reader, personal development enthusiast, network marketing professional and a volunteer. I’m also interested in travelling, gardening, and sports. You can read about me and visit my blog with a click on this link https://about.me/hosannaoyibo.

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LOLO CYNTHIA: BATTLE OF THE INNER VOICES

4:35 AM- Almost time for Lolo’s 5 am run. She is awake but still laying in bed; her body aches from the workout of last night but she knows she has to run to also release her muscles.

 

Lolo Cynthia Is a public health specialist, sexuality educator and founder of the social enterprise LoloTalks, that employs all forms of media (online and offline) to create awareness and sustainable solutions to our contemporary social and health issues in Africa.  She also doubles as a documentary and talk show producer and lends her voice on issues regarding interpersonal relationships, sexuality, gender, and social issues through her YouTube channel LoloTalks and her blog.

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HOW TO THINK POSITIVE EVERYDAY

Many of us may have heard of the importance of positivity but few can really tell why it’s important. When we are trapped with a reduced number of choices as a result of emotions coming into play, we make wrong regretful decisions.

So it’s really important to think positive.But… how?

Thousands of articles online teach us how to think positive in the most clichéd ways possible. You should cheer up, crack a smile, look on the bright side of life…blah…blah..blah…

Don’t worry! The tips you are going to see below are nothing like those. We aim to offer some practical and specific tips for you to start making REAL changes.

Start with your posture: sit up straight! It’s more than etiquette

While one may think cultivation of positivity always requires conscious effort, indeed it doesn’t.

Sitting up straight may appear irrelevant to positivity. But a study reveals the association between posture and positive thoughts.

The result shows that people are more likely to generate positive thoughts and recall positive memories when they are sitting up straight.[2]

So, sit up straight right now! Sometimes tiny things in life all contribute to our well-being without us noticing.

Have a teaspoon in your pocket

What else can a teaspoon do other than stirring our refreshing cup of coffee? Well, a Quora user, William Peynsaert, thinks of a brilliant idea to use a teaspoon for our evasion from negativity. [3]

All we need is a teaspoon. Nothing more.

Well, technically, we also need a pair of pants with pockets. In case we are not wearing any.

What we do is to put the teaspoon into either one side of the pocket. Whenever we feel like formulating a negative thought, put the teaspoon into another pocket. Just that simple.

The principle behind is that the action occupies our brains so we don’t have spare resources to bring up any negative thoughts. Usually we are quite impulsive to have negative thoughts and by the time we finished transferring the teaspoon, the urge is long gone and SNAP! We successfully stop a negative thought.

At first we may find ourselves doing it over and over again. But eventually, we will do this less and less.

After all, we can choose whatever utensils or stationery or anything that fit us. It’s just a medium.

It may sound silly but it does work.

Instead of news, read something uplifting in the morning

It is common to watch morning news reports. For the sake of keeping abreast of the latest news. This is definitely good not to block ourselves off the outside world. But, what news is mostly about?

Car crash. Terrorist attack. Natural disaster. All sorts of disheartening incidents.

I am not suggesting us not read any news but a trade off. Devote part of your morning on something more uplifting.

Start our daily confidence programming habit. Instead of news update, begin our day by reading a chapter of an empowering book. We can also go for our favorite spiritually boosting and inspirational materials.

 

List 3 things you’re grateful for every day

It is simple and easy to do. Try to list at least 3 things we are grateful for every day. In the end, we won’t realize how much it helps us.

Researches [4] reveal a multitude of benefits in expressing gratitude on a daily basis. Being grateful is associated with our well-being. It can also improve relationships and help with emotional maturity. Gratitude can simply promote happiness.

It’s true that we can always find dissatisfaction in life. Same to satisfaction. Half-filled and half-empty glass.

It’s actually a piece of cake to find things we can express gratitude on.

Start of weekend. Cats and dogs outside. Hiking trip cancelled. Meh!

Well, at least we have a home sheltering us. We even have Netflix to entertain ourselves.

Or, year review.. NO pay raise. Can it be worse?

You are not sacked, aren’t you? You still have a stable job.

Or even, back to very basic. We are still alive, right? We are still living in this world of mystery and amazement. We still have lots to explore. There’s nothing to mourn on.

There are always angels and devils in our brains. While we are usually the devil’s advocate, try to stand on the angel’s side now.

Use the app “Happify” to cultivate positivity scientifically

Ever imagined an app to ‘happify’ ourselves. An app to delight ourselves and brighten our day?

Then try Happify, an app designed specially for us to handle our negative emotions. It provides us with scientifically-proven tools and techniques to promote our emotional well-being.

It consists of short activities and games for us to relearn situations and be more aware of the subtle little things we should be grateful for.

While we usually the gadgets are taking a toll out of us, it is now possible to cultivate positivity right back from it.

Celebrate your small wins every day

One easy way to start cultivating our positivity is to write down our small wins on a daily basis. And research has reassured the potential benefits of doing so.

Progress is a lot more than just a step closer to success, as Amabile and Kramer suggest. In fact, if we properly record our progress, no matter how small it is, we instantly receive a confidence boost!

Teresa Amabile from Harvard Business School and Steven Kramer read through approximately 12,000 diary entries written by 238 individuals from 7 different companies. The employees were asked to write about their emotions and moods, motivation levels, and perceptions of the work environment as well as what work they did and what events stood out in their minds on a daily basis for 4 months. [5]

The result showed that any accomplishment, regardless of its size, activates the reward circuitry of our brains. Once activated, a chemical dopamine is released and this chemical is associated to the feeling of pride and achievement.

More importantly, the chemical also motivates us to continue on with the taking challenges and to attempt to repeat the same achievement next time. This forms a positive reinforcement loop that makes us more likely to be successful.

So pay close attention to what you achieved. Ran for 400m? Got up 10 minutes earlier? Mark these down and recognize yourself! It’s never too much.

By: Jefferey Lau

For: Lifehack.org

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LUPITA NYONG’O’S COVER FOR ANOTHER MAGAZINE‘S NEWEST ISSUE IS ALL SHADE OF ”WAKANDA”

Another day, AnOther Magazine cover for actress Lupita Nyong’o.

The movie star is simply described as “Majesty” on the cover of the magazine’s latest issue.

The magazine describes the Academy Award-winning star as “A Gracious Role Model for Our Times. Principled yet unpredictable, considered yet authentic…”

She talks to the magazine about her new movie “Us”, working with director Jordan Peele, her role in “Black Panther” and so much more.

Read excerpts below.

On working with Jordan Peele in Us: “I’d walk off a cliff for Jordan Peele. I was madly in love with the mind of Jordan from the Key & Peele days, and I remember putting him on my ‘one day I’ll work with’ list. Then I saw Get Out. I saw it in the cinema five times in one month. I was just so fascinated by it”

On how a meeting with Ralph Fiennes early in her career helped: “I was having lunch with Ralph (Fiennes) one day and he asked me about my interests, and I told him that I wanted to be an actor, I think. He said, ‘Only do it if there’s nothing else you want to do, if there’s nothing else you feel you could do.’ It wasn’t, ‘Here’s my number, I’ll be your mentor.’ It wasn’t that but he gave me a lot of food for thought.”

On Black Panther: “When I think what Black Panther has done for Africans and Africans in their diaspora, it’s this allegorical story about the relationship between Africa and America, reflected in the relationship between T’Challa and Killmonger. It’s a chance for both to consider each other’s perspective in a way that I don’t think popular culture has been effective at doing. It’s really the start of a long-overdue conversation. In no way does it call for answers, but it’s the opportunity to begin to [rexognize] what it is we have in common.”

For more from Lupita, visit AnotherMag.com.

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