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Raising children in this digital age is different from our days where we were raised with restrictions. In the digital age, there are no restrictions. Everything is out there , whether you like it or not. This makes it challenging for parents to raise their children, if they don’t become deliberate and intentional about it.

Recently, I was having a conversation with a client, and as we continued the conversation, I said “parenting is a business and it must be treated as such”. Immediately, I said this, I looked at her and I could see that it took some self control for her not to roll her eyes at me. In that moment, I realised that there were probably a lot of mums out there who would probably not agree with this statement.

I could understand why this lady thought this way. We know that a business is the act of making, buying or selling products or services in exchange for money; so, classifying parenting as a business sounded absurd to her.

If you take a minute to think about it, you’ll realise that God placed the business of parenting in your hands. He also gave clear instructions when He blessed you with that child which is to train him up the way he should go!

In this digital age, everything you thought you knew about parenting has probably changed. However, our role as parents remain the same . Therefore, you cannot continue to use the ancient method you were brought up with, with your children and expect to get great results.

I have come to realize that when things are practicable, we understand it, because we can visualize it better. So, let’s relate it to real life business. As parents, you will do everything you can to grow in your business or career. You will pay business coaches, take professional courses, write qualifying exams, travel for days or months, if necessary, to progress in your field. However, when it comes to raising your child, you prefer to figure it out, make mistakes and wait for God to sort it out for you.

Can you progress in your business or career, if the knowledge you use is outdated? Imagine using the knowledge of 5,10, 20 years ago to operate in 2019? You would be out of a job if you had a career, or out of business if you were an entrepreneur as your competition must have taken over . In fact, it’s no news that if you want to succeed in business in this day and age, you must continuously innovate.

Now, if you must continuously innovate yourself or business to stay ahead of your competitors, why do you think it is okay to parent your kids in the same way you were brought up 20, 30 years ago? Why are you not seeking new ways to raise your digitized babies?

We have left raising our children to chance, the internet, gadgets, schools, teachers and religious organisations. We don’t do this to our businesses/careers? Why do that to your children? Your children are given to you to nurture, teach, guide and train and it is a role you shouldn’t take lightly.

Raising children in this digital age is different from our days where we were raised with restrictions. In the digital age, there are no restrictions. Everything is out there , whether you like it or not. This makes it challenging for parents to raise their children, if they don’t become deliberate and intentional about it. The days of trial and error are long gone. We need to start to seek help where necessary, because in this day and age it is so easy to lose a child.

Why?

Because the world is moving too fast and children are easily carried away if they aren’t brought up the right way.

Want to learn how to parent right and excel in this business of raising your child? Here are a few helpful tips:

Be a role model
Your kids are watching. 80% of your parenting is made easier if you practice what you preach to your children.

Speak positively
Rather than label your child in the negative light, use a positive approach. For example, rather than say you’re a liar, say, you know you’re not a liar, so why did you have to lie?

Create and spend quality time with them
Spending as little as 30 minutes a day, intentionally, will have more impact on them than not spending any time at all. Your children will also appreciate spending this time with you.

Invest in your kids’ talents and gifts
If they’re particularly skilled at something say singing, be their number one cheerleader. Gone are the days you have to be a medical doctor to be rich and famous.

Involve them in your day to day activities
Even if you run a tight schedule, you can bond with them through routine activities like ironing, cooking and cleaning.

Listen to them and don’t be too quick to judge
Your kids are human beings too, ask for their opinion on issues concerning them and listen to them.

Be quick to apologize when you’re wrong
Some of our parents are guilty for always wanting to be right and never apologising when they’re wrong. Don’t be that parent. In fact, don’t be too surprised if your little one calls you out for not apologising. We are in 2019 after all.

Invest in getting knowledge
Some of us need more help than others when it comes to parenting. If you think you need more knowledge to raise your child(ren), get it.

Teach them through life stories
Children often connect better with stories, so ensure you teach them valuable life lessons in the same way. In addition, it is okay to be vulnerable with your children.

Teach them the power of choice and consequences of decisions
Help them to understand that the choices they make can make or mar them for life.

Pray for them and with them
Prayer is key when raising kids in this day and age. But, remember you have a part to play before God can do His. Some parents are quick to hide under the umbrella of prayers and forget their responsibility.

While it takes a village to raise a child, being an intentional parent, who puts in some work and thought, will surely help in the long run.

Source: Bellanaija

Rapper and writer, Eva Alordiah shared a post on her Instagram page on how to get over an ex after breakup.

In the post, she talked about how moving on from a breakup is very important even though it seems hard to deal with especially when one has invested so much time in the relationship.

She wrote:

Why is it so Hard for you to Get over your #Ex? Have you thought about this at all or are you simply just deciding that you cannot get over them?
Breakups are hard, especially when you have spent time connecting and building with someone.
Unfortunately, sometimes, things end.
They just do.
But it’s up to you to realize when it is time to let go and stop fighting to hold on to things.

Do understand that the #Universe will always, always, bring to you that which is good for the nourishing and full evolution of your Soul.
If someone is meant to be in your Life, they will always circle back to you. No matter how long it takes.

But right now, you cannot continue to fight, and to grapple and hold on to people especially when they aren’t holding on to you.
All you’ll be doing is picking at the wounds, making the pain worse and delaying your own emotional healing.

As bad as Breakups are, they are in fact good for us.
They help us reflect on who we were in the past relationship, and who we want to be moving forward.
Breakups introduce us to a whole new Self that we never before knew existed.

So I challenge you today to face yourself, to get back into the sweet rhythm of your life and to Live again.

And stop telling yourself that you cannot get over them, for this is a Lie and Time will prove you wrong.

Stop holding on to the past, stop wishing them back. Because you doing so you cut yourself off from the present moment which is where Life is really happening. In the Now.

Let Time glide you slowly through the stream of Life.
Let time help you Heal.

No matter how painful it feels right now, you are going to get over them ❤

Watch video below:

 

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Why is it so Hard for you to Get over your #Ex? Have you thought about this at all or are you simply just deciding that you cannot get over them? _Follow @evaxalordiah _Follow @evaxalordiah _ BREAKUPS ARE HARD, especially when you have spent time connecting and building with someone. Unfortunately sometimes, things end. They just do. But it's up to you to realize when it is time to let go and stop fighting to hold on to things. Do understand that the #Universe will always, always, bring to you that which is good for the nourishing and full evolution of your Soul. If someone is meant to be in your Life, they will always circle back to you. No matter how long it takes. But right now, you cannot continue to fight, and to grapple and hold on to people especially when they aren't holding on to you. All you'll be doing is picking at the wounds, making the pain worse and delaying your own emotional healing. As bad as Breakups are, they are in fact good for us. They help us reflect on who we were in the past relationship, and who we want to be moving forward. Breakups introduce us to a whole new Self that we never before knew existed. So I challenge you today to face yourself, to get back into the sweet rhythm of your life and to Live again. And stop telling yourself that you cannot get over them, for this is a Lie and Time will prove you wrong. Stop holding on to the past, stop wishing them back. Because you doing so you cut yourself off from the present moment which is where Life is really happening. In the Now. Let Time glide you slowly through the stream of Life. Let time help you Heal. No matter how painful it feels right now, you are going to get over them ❤ _ #TheTruthonTuesday #Throwback #EvaAlordiah #EnergyGiver #WaterWomanEvaAlordiah _ ♡ ♡ ♡ PLEASE SHARE THIS to your WhatsApp and #InstaStories to keep the good energy flowing. Tag me 💥 ♡ Wanna talk to someone? GET A PHONE CALL with me to talk about anything. DM to Request Access.❤

A post shared by #EnergyGiver |11:11 Lightwork (@evaxalordiah) on

Black women are out here diversifying the #BlackExcellence portfolio! 25-year-old Catari Jackson just became the Shreveport Police Department’s (SPD) first Black woman in Mounted Patrol, the Shreveport Times reports.

 Jackson has been a patrol officer with the SPD for four years. When she transitioned departments to Shreveport’s downtown area, she was informed that she would be going to “horse school” as a training requirement for officers in that area.

Jackson didn’t know she was literally blazing a new trail. While completing her four-week course to get certified in Mounted Patrol someone told Jackson, “Um, have you noticed you’re the first?” The thought never crossed her mind. Jackson spoke to the press saying, “It’s a great feeling…God placed me here to be an example for other young women.”

Photo courtesy of Emily Enfinger/The Times

The image of Jackson in uniform and with her horse is a welcomed one. After a Shreveport Police group on Facebook shared photos of the new members of the Mounted Patrol, the ones featuring her received a plethora of likes and shares. 

We’re excited for young kids and other women in Shreveport and beyond to see this type of representation. Congratulations Catari! We wish you and your horse, Rock, the best in your new endeavors!

Source: BOTWC

Reality tv star and beauty entrepreneur, Kim Kardashian opened up about her struggle with Psoriasis for the past eight years.

In an in-depth essay she shared on Kourtney Kardashian’s website, Poosh, Kim revealed she first experienced the condition in her twenties, but it came back strongly in her thirties and this year, it was at its all-time high.

According to Poosh :

Earlier this year is when it got extremely bad – it covered my whole face and a majority of my entire body.

Today I’m sharing with Poosh my journey with the autoimmune conditions psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis, including what’s worked for me and how I’ve adjusted my life since being diagnosed.

It’s been 13 years since I experienced my first psoriasis flare-up…. I am the only child my mom passed down her autoimmune issue to. Lucky me, lol. When I was 25, I had my first psoriasis flare-up.

I got a common cold, and since psoriasis is an autoimmune condition, this triggered it. It was all over my stomach and legs. Luckily, in my apartment complex at the time, my neighbour was a dermatologist.

I have learned to live with this spot without using any creams or medication—I just deal. Sometimes I cover it up and sometimes I don’t. It doesn’t really bother me

If you have psoriasis, you can’t let it ruin your life or get the best of you. You have to do what you can to make sure you are comfortable but not let it take over.

I hope my story can help anyone else with an autoimmune disease feel confident that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Click here to read the full story

See Photos below

Photo CreditPoosh

 

 

Credit: Bella Naija

Singer, Celine Dion has pleaded with Drake not to get a tattoo of her face, two years after he told her he wanted one.

The Canadian stars met at the 2017 Billboard Music Awards where Drake, 32, told Celine, 51, that he was “‘like a year away from a Céline tat” on his body.

Speaking at the time, Drake said: “It means the world, you’re very iconic. We love you. I’m like a year away from a Celine tat.”

However, now Celine has issued a public plea to Drake not to get the personal inking.

But in a recent video for iHeartRadio Canada, Celine said: “Please Drake, I love you very much. Can I tell you something? Don’t do that.

“You can write me love letters, you can send me autographs for my kids, you can come and visit. I can have you home for lunch or dinner… we can go for a drink. We can sing together. Whatever you want to do – I can talk to your mother – whatever you want! But please…”

Celine added she didn’t want Drake to get her face etched on his body as due to aging, the tattoo will eventually wrinkle and her face will look “not pretty”.

“This is not the money maker over here, first of all,” she went on. “But the thing that I want to say to you is that all of us here, we are going forward in life. I’ve always been very thin. And as time goes … as you go older — you too, when time comes — my face will go longer and it will go not prettier. So please don’t tattoo. If you do it, just do a fake one so you can change your mind.

 

 

Credit: fabwoman.ng

I was sitting at the hospital, cradling my six-month-old son, trying to process the information I had just received. How could I be more than three months pregnant, and have a six-month-old baby? How? I mean, I was exclusively breastfeeding. We had just introduced my son to water and puree foods. How?

I couldn’t believe it. I don’t know for how long I sat on that hospital bench before I decided I was strong enough to leave. The tests had to be wrong. Surely. Nigerian hospitals, probably my blood sample had been mistaken for someone else’s. There had to be a mistake somewhere.

I was really pregnant.

So we had two boys, exactly eleven months and three weeks apart. Crazy, right? During those nine months I completely shut myself off from everything and everyone, ghosted, like the millennials call it. I couldn’t believe I was in such a situation. Needless to say that it was one of the most difficult periods of my life. I couldn’t wait for it to be over. I believed things would get better once we had the baby. I was borderline depressed.

Labour eventually came, and I almost didn’t survive the day. I was in so much pain, probably because my body was tired and had very little or no time at all to recover from the first birth.

On that bed I kept wondering how I got into that situation, and if I could ever get out. But we survived. My second son came, finally, and I thought it was all over. I could move on with my life. I’d never have another child. All I had to do was return back to my normal self and raise them. Sigh. Little did I know.

We were completely unprepared for the reality of having two babies that were twins, yet not twins. We had to employ a series of helps and nannies that initially came to help, but took advantage of the situation and began to make all kinds of demands. We had to endure, because, I mean, we actually were helpless. The hubby worked full time, and so had to be away most of the time. But he helped as much as he could. I was a corp member then, and had been given maternity leave, so I was home full time. I can vaguely recall one of the nannies telling the hubby, “You know this your wife likes to keep her face somehow.”

At a point, we found ourselves completely alone with two babies, two of them so similar and yet so different. Most nights, with my sleep-clogged eyes, I couldn’t tell which particular baby was crying until I got to their cribs. Suffice it to say that it was a very trying time for me.

So I’m thinking that it’s either exclusive breastfeeding is not a reliable means of contraception, or I’m one of the very few it has failed for. Either way, it was a very difficult experience, one I never wish to relive again. Oh, and the boys are all grown up now, with the second one well over two years old, with a few weeks old baby sister.

I guess it all worked out in the end.

 

 

Credit: Rita Chidinma, Bella Naija

I have had so many sober moments but the most recent one came about a few weeks back while looking after a loved one at a clinic.

Granted that the hospital environment can be quite depressing, I was so unprepared for the sobering moments I experienced there. I saw every imaginable orthopedic/surgical case ranging from broken/disfigured limbs, gunshot wounds to severe burns, etc.

While there, I tried so much to confine myself to the room, as most of the sights were gory, but one could not help running into them every now and then.

It’s so touching to see someone in severe physical and emotional pains, being so calm, looking into their faces, one saw gratitude for being alive, acceptance of “what is” and hope for a new beginning.

My initial reaction was that of fear and dark imaginings, asking myself what I had to do if I were in their shoes, and then followed by an exclamation of “God forbid, not my portion!’’

Then it dawned on me that they probably said more, thus life never announces the misfortunes that can come one’s way, but what is important is how we choose to take it.

This changed my perception of things and I began to see each and every one of them as heroes, not just because they survived what came their way, but more because of the positive attitude with which they carried their crosses.

I began to reach out, remembering them more in my prayers, having a kind and encouraging word plus a ready smile for all that came my way.

Two lives were lost while I was there and the pain of the relatives cannot be described.

While there, I met a very beautiful lady, who survived (though immobilised at the moment) an auto accident that claimed the lives of her husband and their only child. Thus came the end of her three-year-old marriage. I have never ceased to marvel at her strength, much as I know she could be going through a lot emotionally.

Her calmness shames me!

I also met a young lady in her early twenties, a university undergraduate; she was going back to school when the accident happened. Her spinal cord was affected and she is confined to a wheelchair at the moment, she has spent over a year at the hospital.

I will not forget little Samuel, whom we all call “mulanky.” He is a gregarious two-year-old, very cute. Samuel had a name for everything and everyone; one became so fond of him that I felt bad the day he was leaving the clinic. He was there due to a broken limb.

In all, I believe this little “getaway” has once again reminded me how precious life is and how lucky those that are in good health are. It has also reminded me to remember the sick more in my prayers.

I was particularly impressed with the various church groups who found the time to come around, talk to and pray for the sick. That to me is priceless, letting someone know you care enough to make an effort to come visit them in the hospital, even when they are not personally known to you. The psychological benefit (to the sick) cannot be over emphasised.

This taught me that “it’s all in the efforts we make,” and in this sober moments, I have resolved more than ever to be thankful for the blessings of life, however small, to be a blessing to those around me and humanity in general and never take anything(life especially) for granted.

I am learning to live my best life daily because one is only sure of now…the next minute is not guaranteed.

The whole experience really got me thinking…how beautiful and humane it will all be if people begin to send a little something to hospitals of our choice for babies like little Samuel, who had to stay back after they had been discharged…for lack of funds to offset hospital bills. The Samuels of this world will have access to good and prompt medical attention if we all make efforts in that regard.

It’s the least we can do for the little ones in our world. Please look around you, choose a hospital or reputable charity organisation for this purpose.

I must also add that it is not enough to make this commitment, monitor how the funds are being dispensed; make an effort to meet some of the beneficiaries whenever you can. You have learned to appreciate life more and it’s so soul- cleansing to know you helped give a child a chance to stay healthy and alive.

I am currently compiling a list of general hospitals to recommend for charity purposes. If you need suggestions, please contact me via SMS.

God bless your efforts.

 

 

 

Credit: Chukwuneta Oby, Guardian Woman

 

According to the Chicago Sun Times, Joan Johnson, co-founder of the trailblazing Black hair care company, Johnson Products, has passed away at the age of 89.

In 1954 Joan and her husband George Johnson, started what would become the world’s largest Black owned business, Johnson Products. The two started the company with a $250 investment on the South Side of Chicago. The hair care company dominated the market for decades, with famous trademark products like “Afro Sheen.” Johnson Products sales eventually grew from about $4 million in 1967 to $40 million in 1976. Read that again, $40 million in 1976!

Johnson was relentless in her business pursuits and even more relentless in uplifting and empowering other Black businesses and business owners. Johnson Products became the first company to sponsor the hit variety show, Soul Train, helping to elevate it to a national audience. Johnson also helped to sponsor and organize the Congressional Black Caucus Fashion Show, served as a board member of the Museum of Contemporary Art and was a member of the women’s boards at the University of Chicago and Northwestern University. She also served as a trustee of Spelman College, where she donated to an annual scholarship fund.

Eric G. Johnson, the oldest son of the hair care maven said she passed away last Friday evening, after a lengthy illness stemming from a 2005 accident that caused her to undergo five back surgeries.

“I look at my mother as a pioneer,” Eric Johnson said. “She and my father had no provided path. They created a path where there was none.”

Johnson also said that while his mother spearheaded the business, his father served as the creative genius behind the products.

“My dad could come up with brand names and products, and [my mom] brought the culture of integrity to the company. People had a great deal of confidence in her ability to make the company successful,” he said.

As a result of the couples joint efforts, in 1971, Johnson Products became the first Black owned company to be traded on the American Stock Exchange. The company also frequently came in at number one on Black Enterprise Magazine’s list of the nation’s largest Black owned businesses. The Johnsons were awarded with the magazine’s highest honor, the A.G. Gaston Lifetime Achievement Award.

Eric Johnson said his mother “set a direction and standard” for the family. “Because of her, people have been able to accomplish things they maybe didn’t think they could, and they knew all the things they had to strive for.”

Because of Her, we can!

 

It’s worthy to note there’s is no one right format to write a CV. One rule you should note, however, is that your CV should be able to put you in the spotlight for the role you’re applying for, this will inform the HR manager or recruiters decision to invite you to an interview.

What is a CV?

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

A curriculum vitae popularly known as CV is brief synopsis or account of your educational, professional experience, skills and more typically used for job applications.

There are 2 types of CVs – the educational CV and the experience focused type. The former focuses on educational/professional qualification and academic work and is usually for applicants who have no work experience while the latter focuses on professional experience, skills and achievements.

Listing either educational or professional experience is best done by starting with them from most recent to oldest. It’s Important to always adapt your CV to a job industry and consistently tweak them for advertised job roles.

The CV Writing Format

1. Personal Details

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

This section consists of your name, address, age (not be compulsory), phone number, email. Put these in a strategic location and in legible fonts so that they can be easily seen by the HR manager or recruiter. Ensure the information provided are current.

Pro Tip: Never use an email that is not yours. Avoid stating your state of origin, religion (except if specified in the job advertorial) and unprofessional email addresses. Examples of this would be obiswag10@xyz.com or sexyprincess2015@xyz.com. Keep it professional.

2. Work Experience

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

Start with your most recent job role. For each job role, it’s important to state your role and achievements. An example would be:

Iceberg Communications Limited 2016 – (Present)

Job Title: Marketing Executive

Iceberg Limited is Nigeria’s number one marketplace for electrical home appliances.

Achievement:

  • Individually increased the monthly revenue from N15 million to N25 million in 6 months.
  • Worked with the marketing team to spread our products from Lagos to all the 6 states of the Western Nigeria within a year.
  • Won the ‘Salesman of the Year” award consecutively for November and December 2016.

Pro Tip: Always remember to tweak your job experience in line with what you are applying for. It will increase the employer’s preference for you.

3. Education

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

Always start with the most recent educational qualification. Professional certification that is relevant to the job should also be added to this section.

E.g. University of Port Harcourt – 2013

Qualification: B.A. History and International Relations.

  • Excellent diplomatic skills and versed in three foreign languages – French, Portuguese and Chinese
  • Graduated with a first class grade of 4.56 and won the ‘Best Graduating Student’ award.

Pro Tip: If you have a qualification from a tertiary institution, it’s unimportant to include your primary school first leaving certificate unless you’re a fresh graduate with no work experience. This section includes professional certifications, affiliations/membership, training and seminars; they can appear as a sub-section under education.

4. Interests and Abilities

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

This section should be kept short and simple. Key things to note here are:

  • Avoid clichés such as “creative” “motivated”, “team player”, “problem solve”, “self-starter.” Instead, be specific about your hobbies – Replace ‘running’ with ‘I jog about 300 km every weekend’. This shows you are disciplined and committed.

Pro Tip: Add interests that align with the prospective employer’s corporate social responsibility.

5. References

How to write a professional CV
How to write a professional CV

The standard number of referees is three, although some organisations request for two. The lesser the pages of a CV, the greater attention it receives. As an employer, you would not want to be bothered by CVs that look like handouts. A 2-page CV is excellent. Therefore, be direct, clear and convincing.

Pro Tip: “Never use a referee that you’re not familiar with and has knowledge of using them as referees,” – Prince Ihemegbulam, Jobberman CV Services Analyst pointed out.

Some Tips How to write a good CV

  1. Use active verbs wherever possible. For example, you could include words like ‘created’, ‘analysed’ and ‘devised’ to present yourself as a person who shows initiative.
  2. There should be no spelling or grammar mistakes in your CV. Use a spell checker and enlist a second pair of eyes to check over it.
  3. Avoid using generic phrases such as ‘team player’, ‘hardworking’ and ‘multitasker’. Instead, provide real-life examples that demonstrate all of these skills.
  4. Take a look at the company’s website, local press and the job advert to make sure that your CV is targeted to the role and employer.
  5. Decide whether the chronological, skills-based or academic CV is right for you. For more information, take a look at example CVs.
  6. Don’t put the term ‘Curriculum Vitae’ at the top of your CV.
  7. Provide a professional-sounding email address.
  8. Never lie or exaggerate on your CV or job application. Not only will you demonstrate your dishonesty to a potential employer, but there can be serious consequences too. For example, altering your degree grade from a 2:2 to a 2:1 is classed as degree fraud and can result in a prison sentence.
  9. If you’re posting your CV online don’t include your home address, as you could be targeted by fraudsters.
  10. You should always include a cover letter unless the employer states otherwise. It will enable you to personalise your application for the job. You can draw attention to a particular part of your CV, disclose a disability or clarify gaps in your work history. Find out how to write a persuasive cover letter.

Things Employers Look Out For

One survey of employers found that the following aspects were most looked for

(From the brilliant 2010 Orange County Resume Survey by Eric Hilden)

45% Previous related work experience
35% Qualifications & skills
25% Easy to read
16% Accomplishments
14% Spelling & grammar
9% Education (these were not just graduate recruiters or this score would be much higher!)
9% Intangibles: individuality/desire to succeed
3% Clear objective
2% Keywords added
1% Contact information
1% Personal experiences
1% Computer skills

So, there is it! Isn’t it time to give your CV another look? Another great way to get yourself an interview-landing CV is to get a CV Rewrite from recruitment professionals.

 

This article was first published on https://www.jobberman.com/

 

Credit: Pulse, Jobberman

I’d look at pregnant women in my class, struggling to meet up with one assignment or the other, always asking for lecture notes and sometimes looking completely lost, worn out and confused in their maternity dresses, and I would wonder why they didn’t just take it one at a time, why they bothered with pregnancy considering how stressful the final year of school was. I thought they didn’t have their priorities right.

I tried to help one in particular, Ugochi, as much as I could because we were pretty cool prior to her wedding and subsequent pregnancy. But, I have to admit, inside me I was insensitive. I thought she could come to school earlier, actually do an assignment before the deadline, write her own notes most of the time, “if only she put her mind to it.”

Well, guess what. Just a few years down the line, I became the pregnant lady in class. Here I was, with a son, pregnant and running a post graduate program. I never seemed to catch a break. There was simply no time to accommodate all I had to do in one day.

By the time I woke up, prepared breakfast, dressed and dropped my son off at preschool, came back to prepare for my own school, stayed in traffic to get there, I would be completely exhausted. I joined the no-makeup gang not out of my own will, but because I didn’t have the precious few minutes it would take to get some makeup on. I constantly asked my colleagues a whole lot of questions trying to make sure I was up to date on everything going on. I’d sacrifice hours of sleep, spending it on my table writing assignments, studying or doing research work. It finally dawned on me: I had become the pregnant lady in class. I had become the lady with the rounded belly and maternity dresses, always looking tired and barely meeting assignment deadlines, and who everyone unconsciously grouped as “not one of us.”

How did life become so busy? I was no longer in the “cool gang.” Lots of females dressed better than me in class (because they weren’t pregnant, obviously) and I never seemed to stop being in a hurry. My attention was always needed elsewhere, and so my day was always planned to the last hour, detailed. Take, for instance, me being in school by 3 PM. It meant I would be late to pick up my son from preschool. And how about lunch and dinner and chores, guess who that was on too?

I quietly dusted most of my colleagues in the first semester results, and they were all astonished. Most of them couldn’t believe I could still make good grades despite all my responsibilities. The results were a huge consolation to me for all my sleepless nights, but I couldn’t help but feel terrible for all the times I was insensitive toward pregnant women who were trying their best to meet up with family life and schooling.

Women are the real superheroes, and deserve to be celebrated. Ugochi, my classmate back in our undergraduate days, was probably trying her very best to meet up with everything. And the same goes for most pregnant and family women out there. Some have to work 9-5 every single day, and still find a way to meet up with other numerous responsibilities. Oh and they still find a way to be graceful while at it. Some play the role of wife, mother, nanny, cook, primary care giver, business owner and career woman, all at the same time, without breaking a sweat.

So if you’re reading this today, show some love to that pregnant woman in your class, or at your place of work. A kind word from you might just be all the encouragement they need to adjust their capes and go about their day.

 

 

Culled from Bella Naija

Credit: Rita Chidinma