New year resolutions - Women of Rubies

In lifestyle February 5, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

CHISOM WINIFRED: THE THING ABOUT NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

Feel free to blame it on the spur of the moment. Everyone is excited and feeling like they can take on the world. At this point, we can promise God anything.

We’re gearing towards that time of the year again, the time for New Year resolutions. I hope you had a jolly Christmas, with plenty rice and chicken? Good, because it’s time for a blast of the naked truth.

We’ve all done it. Promised heaven and earth on New Year day. God, I will stop smoking. I will read my books this semester. I will serve you more this year. No sex for me this year. I’ll give all my time and energy to my business idea. Blah blah blah.

9 out of 10 times, we don’t even keep our promises till mid-January. After the first few weeks, everything flies out the window. It is okay to want to be better, set goals, turn a new leaf, but I think the concept of New Year resolutions is overhyped. I’ll tell you why.

If a person truly desires to make a resolution about his or her life, I don’t think they would wait for January first to do it.

So in 2019, instead of listing those things you know in your heart you probably will never do, why not set a definite goal? Don’t call it a resolution, call it a goal and map out strategic steps to achieve it.

A goal is the ongoing pursuit of a worthy objective until accomplished. Ongoing means it’s a process because goals take time. Pursuit indicates that a chase is involved. There will likely be some obstacles to overcome. Worthy shows that the chase will be worthwhile, there’s a big reward at the end to endure the tough times. Until accomplished suggests you’ll do whatever it takes to accomplish the set goal.

Instead of our usual litany of things to do and stop doing, why not choose one goal and give it all your energy?

Another mistake we often make is creating unclear goals, vague goals. I once had a New Year resolution to buy a car. I was 14 years old and in junior secondary school. Was it a reasonable goal for a 14-year-old? I think so. We’re supposed to dream big, right? But if you asked me then, how do you intend to accomplish this goal, I would have mumbled a bunch of good sounding gibberish because I always had an answer to everything. But I wouldn’t have had a clear answer. In creating goals, use this trick: Be more specific. When you write your goal down, tell yourself, Be more specific, then write your new answer. Keep repeating this until the goal is crystal clear and measurable. There are no such things as unrealistic goals, only unrealistic time frames. If I had said as a 14-year-old, “I’ll buy a car before I’m twenty-five,” that would have been more realistic, wouldn’t it?

Last tip for setting your 2019 New Year resolution (goals): What can you create using your unique talents? What do you do that other people find difficult? What opportunities exist in today’s marketplace for your area of exceptionality? I don’t know about you, but the New Year is about working smart, not hard.

About Chisom Winifred

Chisom Winifred is a creative writer with a flair for freelance articles. She’s currently a content creator for Blueafric Media where she also heads campaigns that focuses on brand introduction, positioning and promotion of its clients.
A red carpet and TV host, she was the red carpet host for Blueafric media at the just concluded 2017 AFRIFF. Reach out to Winifred on Chisomwinnifred.cw@gmail.com or her blog http://blueprintafric.com/

In self development January 14, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

JANE UDOKA: BYE 2018! HERE COMES 2019: TIPS TO A BETTER LIVING IN THE NEW YEAR

All the 365 days of 2018 was a pretty eventful year for me and I’m sure for a lot of people out there. There were the joyous moments, the sad memories, the pretty memorable times and of course the life changing events. Cumulatively, it had it’s lessons and ones we’d be sure to take note of in the never ending quest to becoming better versions of ourselves

Whilst 2018 had a lot of self evaluation lessons in it, these are a few that are definitely worth working with into the new year:

1: Be kind to yourself:

It’s no big secret that the country economy is tough and there are just about enough reasons to worry and beat yourself up over about each day. But, in the midst of all those thoughts and moves towards a better life, never forget to talk to yourself kindly . The world will still be there, even when you’re gone so why not relax a little after a long day, take time off work on the weekends and just enjoy the little things of life, you might just be surprised just how refreshing that would prove to be.

2: Be Expressive yet assertive:

2018 taught me just how much differently people can interpret what we say from what we actually mean. Yes, in the long run, you can’t control how people perceive and interpret your energy but one thing you can do however, is be very clear about your intentions. It saves everyone a lot of stress trying to decipher what you mean exactly at the end and that’s certainly what we want 2019 to be, stress-free.

3: Act and think positively:

A saying goes thus, “ the world will throw stones at you, it is your choice what you make of the stones, a wall against your self or build a bridge to your dreams”. I’d say I’d take the bridge, build an overpass and add an intersection to the whole lot. For every negative thought that crosses your mind, we always have a choice to dwell on it or banish it from us and look onwards with positivity, cause it can only get better this 2019!

4: Find and fuel your passion:

2018 was an enlightening year for me. I got to find out what really mattered and phased out gradually what didn’t. A passion is definitely something you’d want to find and keep doing. It gives life a purpose, it doesn’t necessarily have to be money oriented at the moment, just basically something that lights up your soul and gives you a sense of achievement.

5: Break that routine:

A routine makes life mundane and boring. When done over a long time, it limits one’s thoughts and creates this monotonous outlook on life. Once in a while, take out time to reach out to loved ones, take that trip to that wildlife conservatory you’ve always wanted to see, go see the movies or just enjoy your own company.

Finally, friends are a basic necessity of life, great friends add quality to life, trust me. Make friends that hold you accountable, and push you towards becoming the best you can be.Let’s do better this year!

Happy new year lovelies!.

About Jane

21 year old Udoka Jane O is a trained Engineer, She is a professional freelance writer on Relationship and healthy lifestyles. Jane has written a number of mind engaging articles….

In self development January 7, 2019 By Esther Ijewere

IJEOMA THOMAS ODIA: HELP YOUR KIDS MAKE NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

Last year, my daughter saw me scribbling fast on my notepad and wanted to know what I was up to. I told her about my New Year resolutions and she was interested in writing hers, said Rita Bada, lead speaker for a teens-based outfit called Riospeaks.

“So, together, we embarked on a project of writing her New Year resolutions. She wrote down things she wanted to accomplish the next year and how to accomplish them. So far, she did accomplish most of them and I am glad we did it together.”

According to history, the ancient Babylonians are said to have been the first people to make New Year resolutions, some 4000 years ago. New Year resolutions have to do with making goals that we want to carry out in a new year. In summary, they are promises we make in order to live a better life. It is not enough to make resolutions. We must state the objectives of that goal.

The foremost teen coach stressed that children are certainly not left out, “I believe that great things start with small beginnings and as such children should be encouraged to start now so that as they grow older, it becomes a part of them. There is no better time than now to teach your children why and when they should write their New Year resolutions. From an early age, it teaches them to be purpose driven, focused and goal-oriented. This goes with them as they grow into adulthood.

Bada noted that when her daughter wrote down her resolutions, she pasted it on the wall and it was a constant reminder of what she was supposed to do from time to time. It guarded her daily actions because she had a column where she ticked done after she had accomplished any, and where she missed one she tried to make up for it. This really helped her to understand the importance of goal- setting.

It is important that parents guide their children in making New Year resolutions by intentionally having a simple conversation about it and then help them put it into writing with colourful descriptions and pictures. An example is, if the goal is to live a healthier life, then state when and how many times, snacks is taken to school in a week.

Here are five simple tips to help you and your child in keeping your New Year resolution.

Be Realistic: When setting New Year resolutions, be realistic. Do not set goals you know your child cannot attain. Make smart (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely) goals.

Outline your plan: After you must have decided on the goal, it is important that you outline steps that will help in achieving that goal. For example, if your child wants to be the best in his class, then there is a need to draw up a personal timetable and reduce TV time or time spent on social media.

Track your progress: It is important to have an assessment tool. Find a way of measuring your child’s success from time to time. You might need to talk to his teacher about his performance, constantly review homework together and find better ways to improve.

Celebrate small wins: There is a need to constantly reward your child when you see improvements especially in the achievement of their New Year resolutions. Get a small gift or take him out. This will further boost his morale to do more and stay motivated.

Stick to it: Sometimes, it’s easy for children to lose focus. It is our duty as parents to guide them through the process of achieving their New Year resolutions by encouraging them always.

Bada noted that children should be allowed to make age appropriate resolutions; an example is you cannot expect your five-year old to wash the toilet, but you can expect him to tidy his room by making sure all his toys are neatly kept away. “I want to urge every parent out there to remember that when it comes to resolution, it is important to lead by example.”

Source: Guardian Woman