They say dating is nothing but a game of craps where you’re either going to get lucky and hit it big by meeting the right one or you lose big and walk away with another disappointing experience, which gives you clarity on what you’re looking for.
Having been back on the dating scene for some years now, it’s safe to say that I have had more than my fair share of disappointments, so I’m either a glutton for punishment or am very hopeful that the right one for me is out there somewhere.
The key is recognising and avoiding the men that drain your energy and time, and trust me when I say that there are different types of men that you should avoid at all cost.
God’s Gift to Women
The man who seems to be the complete package is a blessing and a curse all at the same time, because he’s usually going to be physically attractive, successful and have minimal baggage. He’ll often remind you that he is the bomb and while he’ll do all of the things most women would be turned off by, he knows most women will put up with his shenanigans because he really appears to have it going for him. Avoid at all cost.
It seems like the main ones flocking to the dating scene are the same ones who have absolutely no business trying to date, especially if they’re jobless, homeless or just down on their luck. Something you might hear from this type could be how he’s starting over or that he’s trying to get back into the groove of things after a breakup. I’ve come across these men far too often and after a few exchange of messages or conversations, I must say, they can be very convincing and tend to have some of the best game when it comes to schmoozing a woman. You better-run girl, run.
I know women think it’s better to have a hard working man than one who isn’t working at all, but unless you like being on stand-by, are willing to put up with the inconsistent behaviour and the mood swings that come with high-pressure careers, he’s all yours. This type of guy is pretty easy to recognise. His profile will state he’s a “hard-working man who puts in 60 hours a week…” or how he travels a lot and would like an “activity partner…”.
Believe me, I’ve got plenty to say about this one because this type has drifted in and out of my life often. He really either has no time or more aptly put, refuses to make any woman a high enough priority to make time. This man is really looking for fillers for any downtime he may have; someone to exchange a few texts with to make sure he’s not lost his touch, someone to call on those long commutes home, or a bed warmer after a long days work. Bail out girl.
Damsel in Distress
These types of men can be a little confusing because they can be just as driven as the workaholic, yet will still make time for a woman of interest. The problem is that their interest usually comes at a price, because they will demand all of your time, energy and affection and even if you think you’re doing everything right, you’ll see that nothing is ever right or enough for the damsels.
Online dating is their playground because most of them have so many hang-ups, it’s likely they wouldn’t even know how to approach a woman physically and can be pretty controlling early on. You can expect mood swings and rants, find yourself arguing over the most insignificant things and find yourself wondering how much of your sanity is left at the end of every day. The damsel is a charmer indeed, but the clues are always in his profile. Always. So don’t miss that sign.
Get ready for some really confusing times if you happen to come across this type of man because I think he’s a combination of all of the above and will have a few clues in his dating profile that say things like how he’s “open to whatever” and isn’t “forcing anything, but letting things happen”. He’s the type who’s on the fence about everything not willing to say what he does or does not want and your interactions with him will be just the same; hot or cold, on or off and no explanations or talks about where things are going (or aren’t) because this guy isn’t committing to a damn thing. Pack up your shoes and run with your legs touching your back. Trust me.
So there you have it, a list of men you can only hope to avoid and while it isn’t by any means inclusive, it should hopefully give you a fighting chance at dating.
To our happiness. Cheers.