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The Communicator organizes first Elevate Your Communications Summit for creative people.

The inaugural event is scheduled for May 25th 2017, online via a webinar-styled conference with seasoned industry experts as facilitators. It is specifically designed for Content Writers, Engagement Mangers, Graphic Artists and other team members who form a Communications team either internally in an organization or externally in an agency.

Packed with a line up of speakers to dissect several topics are Nkiru Olumide-Ojo, Executive Head, Corporate Communications Stanbic IBTC; Aligning with a Business’ Critical Need, Oluwaseun Shobo, The Brand Master on Personal branding for Creatives, Nelly Abgogu, Nellies healthy foods; Community Building for brands, Mitchelle Defounga, Creative Director, Noah’s Ark, Design; Aesthetics versus Functionality and George Omoraro, Ragemedia Global on Growing in a Digital team.

This hands-on workshop will discuss the importance of communications in a Business and how their roles make them gatekeepers of several brands.

According to the lead consultant, Tracy Oyekanmi, also known as The Communicator, “Businesses need competent staff to be relevant online and we can also leverage the online space to organize trainings that would benefit people in such roles nationwide.  Twenty years ago, some of these roles didn’t exist and the need for capacity development is necessary especially for entry-level staff in these roles.”

Attendees will receive a certificate of participation, discounts on further training from Simon College of Marketing- Nigerian learning partner to undertake Digital Marketing Institute certification as well as gym membership for work life balance with B Natural SPA Group.   There will also be access to further mentorship in an exclusive online group after the event.

The submit is free to attend but registration is compulsory here http://elevateyourcommunicationssummit.gr8.com/

 

My Heart is heavy, no one deserves abuse. I’m inspired to respond to ignorant comments made to an abused victim’s brave story. In this month of Domestic Violence (DV) awareness, here’s some ways we can make a difference: Asking a DV victim ‘what did you do? is not a good way to give advice. Asking her to adjust ‘herself’ or do some behavior modifications does not address the root cause and places responsibility solely on the victim. Advocating ‘run’ sounds good on paper, but doesn’t offer her the practicality needed immediately. It doesn’t tell her HOW to go about it if she’s unemployed, in a situation where there are no helpers or family etc.

Any statement that doesn’t deflect the pain or impact of the abuse on its victim is unfair and unkind. It promotes a false assumption that the victim somehow contributed to his anger. The issue here is not to blame her, blast her or tell her to divorce, BUT to focus on the abuse. When a bloodied battered helpless woman is crying out for help and all we offer in her pain is distant unsympathetic lectures on her ‘adjusting’ her behavior and ‘taking it’, that’s not love. Whatever religion we practice, if we aren’t showing compassion then it is cold religion and biased judgment and is not the Heart of God.

The reason some people die in pain rather than ask for help is because of unsympathetic vibes from people around them. Why not offer support even if we don’t have all the facts? Offer kindness, and ASK the victim what help she actually needs? Dear Abused Woman, You are beautiful and worthy and you are a Queen.

You do not deserve abuse, irrespective of the facts leading to it. You are not alone and you will yet overcome. You will still experience beautiful dreams beyond this drama. Yes, you can go against popular grains to save your life. You deserve to Live. There are a variety of unbiased professional agencies that can help address this. You alone cannot change him, intentional intervention is mostly necessary. You already won because you cried out for help, it isn’t shameful, it is Courage. Dear Friend, Family, Onlookers of DV, Affirm the victim without endorsing the abuse. Offer support or be a listener without asking dumb questions. Be the shelter and safety net for them in their chaos. Ask how they would love to be helped, without bruising their boundaries.

Empower them towards financial independence until they can find their feet (some DV victims have no means to start a new life and are heavily dependent on their abusers for subsistence). Don’t enable the abuser or disable the abused by your action or words.

Take a stand against violence even if the perpetrator is your brother, father etc Protect the battered woman’s honour. Gossip a No-No. Pray for, and love them back into wholeness and confidence. Signed, One who believes in you. Eden A.Onwuk (C)dreden 10.8.16 #Enlightenmentoverarguments #Educationoverignorance

Keesha Hall, a 42-year old Chicago-based mother is on a quest to assist mothers in learning how to help their kids with developmental problems.

Keesha, who herself lived in denial for about 7 years after her fourth child was born, later became determined to learn how to become a champion for her son.

In an interview with Essence, Keesha who is an Entrepreneur and Chair of the Educare Alumni Network, shares how she went from being unemployed, broke and on the brink of poverty to helping mothers with children who have special needs.

What she does

I work privately with clients and go to their houses and help them with their children with special needs. Not all of my clients have children with special needs but the majority of them do.

How to Care for a Child with Special Needs

You have to be understanding and have the patience to be able to live in a household with a child who screams all the time or have difficultly going through life himself. With my son, I’m always grateful for progression rather than perfection because he’s perfect in my eyes and in his own way.

The Challenges of raising a child with Special needs

I’m a mother of four, but I didn’t have this experience living with a child with special needs. I was in denial for a while. He’s 10 now and I was probably in denial for about 7 years. I wasn’t ready to accept the fact that he would struggle or that he would be behind academically. It took years of therapy and years of educating myself, learning more about him and developing patience.

Why she does what she does

If I can help the next person, then they can pay it forward and maybe they can help someone else. So it’s always important for me to give when I have and help the next person.

Advice For Young Mother’s With Special Needs Children

You’ve got to dig deep and you can’t give up. You have to be patient and try to see the world through your child’s eyes.

Source: Bellanaija

Nollywood actress/producer Toyin Abraham on a new episode of Rubbin’ Minds revealed to Ebuka that she regrets ever going into a relationship with her ex, Seun Egbegbe.

The actress who was close to tears explained that it was a very emotional period for her and as such, she always empathizes with women going through similar emotional stress.

 

Maureen Nkeiruka Mmadu is living her dream in Norway where she is  the first Nigerian women’s football coach  attached to a top European club at Avaldsnes  and  the former international told PATRICK NGWAOGU that she’s the best woman to lift the Super Falcons from their present quagmire state on the continent.

MAUREEN Nkeiruka Mmadu was born on May 7, 1975 and hails from Onitsha in Anambra State. She is a Nigerian football coach and former midfielder. As a player, she most recently represented Avaldsnes IL, a First Division team based on Norway’s west coast. She played for several other teams in Norway’s Toppserien as well for Linköpings FC and QBIK in the Swedish Damallsvenskan.

She previously played for Klepp IL in the Norwegian Toppserien. Mmadu played for Kolbotn in Oslo, Norway, for the 2010 season, helping them to third place in the Toppserien league. She was seen playing for Avaldsnes IL in an off-season tournament in Oslo on 5 February, 2012.

She was the first Nigerian player to make 100 appearances for the Nigeria women’s national football team including appearing at four FIFA Women’s World Cups as well as the 2000 and 2004 Summer Olympics.Today, she is the only Nigerian women coach handling a premiership club in Europe.

“From 2012 to date, I have been the assistant coach in Avaldsnes team and chief coach of the same Avaldsens 2 division too,” said Maureen. “So, I’m in the Premier League as assistant and chief coach of 2 division in this same team.

“The club have a lot of respect for me because of my immense contributions to them as a player; I have my UEFA C license as a coach. I’m also a chief coach with a Division 2 women’s team here and an assistant coach in a premier league women team.

“I am also a coach developer in my team since 2012 and I think Nigeria should tap from my wealth of experience as a player and as a coach too.

“I have gathered experience over the years, having played in Europe for 13 years and also as a coach for the past three years with a Premier League women’s team and also a Division 2 women too.

“If I am given the opportunity to handle the Super Falcons, I am going to bring in my best with a lot of experience and teach them how modern-day football is played.

“We have good talents but we lack a lot of things about modern-day football but I  will change their African mentality and ways of playing because football now is not only kicking the ball, you also have to teach them what to do when we are not in possession of the ball too.

“I have worked with some of the best coaches in Europe as assistant in the premier league women here in Norway and I have also learned a lot at various coaching courses I have attended,” she revealed.

Speaking further, the former Nigerian international said she was not oblivious of the problems befuddling the Super Falcons following their failure to qualify for the Rio 2016 Olympic Games as well as missing the soccer Gold Medal at the 2015 All Africa Games in Congo Brazzaville.

“I’m not boasting, and I think I can help the Super Falcons at these challenging times when the team is really struggling,” she said. “I will do my best to change their mentality to the way modern football is played now but I have refused to lobby anybody for the job.

“My job should be able to speak for me and If you check the line up of my team, you would see the Colombian player that played in the last World Cup is here with me.

“We have players from different countries like Brazil, Iceland, Ireland, Colombia, USA and Norway too in the team; if the NFF wants the best for our female team, I should be given the job and honestly I will turn the team around; I don’t talk much but my work should speak for me.”

The amiable former hard working midfielder said she already has a strategy in place should she be given the Super Falcons’ job: “I would only take players who are between the ages of 20-28 years and honesty, I will not tolerate any player who is not ready to work for the team and the country.

“I want to be realistic here. There is nothing a foreign coach is going to teach that I can’t but I would want to stop at that. The difference would only be the colour.

“I have played football at the top level and I have worked with top coaches and I have also played under top coaches and I am now a coach too, so what quality of coaching does the Super Falcons need that I don’t have?

“We have talented players but we are missing a lot in formation, organisation, collective and tactical things to make our women football grow, and I think I have what it takes to handle the Super Falcons at this time,” she concluded

Source: http://thenationonlineng.nethttp://thenationonlineng.net

 

Asmau Benzies Leo is an Ambassador of Peace and Humanity, a Gender Advocate, Women’s Right Activist and a Vital Voices Fellow (a Global network of established women leaders from across the world which was founded by the former US Secretary of State, Senator Hillary Clinton). She is the founder and former Executive Director of the Centre for Nonviolence and Gender Advocacy in Nigeria (CENGAIN). Presently, she heads the Gender and Vulnerable Group Care Unit of the National Emergency Management Agency (NEMA) Abuja, In this interview with TOBI AWODIPE, she reveals how her background propelled her into the life of service, caring for the most vulnerable people in society including the Internally Displaced Persons (IDPs) and victims of Sexual and Gender-based Violence and why rapists deserve life imprisonment.

Tell us about yourself, educational achievements, growing up etc.?
I was born in an average home into the family of Mr Benzies Gangsomense and Mrs Mary Benzies, middle class civil servants in the mid 70s in Ganye local government of Adamawa state. I am Chamba by tribe. Growing up as a child was so interesting. I was so adventurous, I could do many things boys do, I could climb mango trees; make my own toys from the scraps around the house and stand up to any bully that wants to intimidate me. These traits in me from early childhood have helped me build a strong character as an adult and have made me always speak up and defend people that have no voice.

My father had 12 children and I happen to be the fourth child. He treated each of us equally; he never discriminated against us being girls but invested a lot in our education, in order that we might become useful to the society and ourselves. This was his cliché till death took him two years ago. I grew up as an independent minded child because we had a lot of other people staying with us in the house. My mother was taking care of us her own children and still catering for many others but you can hardly differentiate between her own biological children and the other children under her care, because she treated us all the same. I grew up seeing my mother take care of the sick and needy because my father was working as a Chief Nursing Officer in the hospital and when sick people come and they couldn’t afford to pay their hospital bills, they usually went to my mother for assistance and she went out of her way to help. Seeing my mother’s compassion for humanity made me develop the passion to become a humanitarian myself. My family was not rich but we gave out of the little we had.

For my education, I started my early childhood education at Capital Primary School, Birnin Kudu now in Jigawa State, and then when my parent left for Kano state, I continued there but finally concluded my primary education in former Gongola state (now Adamawa State). On finishing primary school I got a scholarship as the pioneer set of the Exchange Program (Unity Schools) in Government Girl’s College in Maiduguri, Borno State and from there, proceeded to the University of Maiduguri where I obtained a degree in Sociology and Anthropology. During my one-year compulsory youth service (NYSC), I was posted to Dutse, Jigawa State where I served. During the service year, as part of my community development project, I carried out a sensitization campaign on the ‘Importance of Girl-Child Education, Prevention of Early Marriage and HIV/AIDS’, which earned me an award. This was what spurred me to establish an NGO that would address the needs of women and girls, advocate for gender parity and the protection of the rights of women and girls especially in disaster situations, hence the starting of Centre for Nonviolence and Gender Advocacy in Nigeria (CENGAIN).

Again, because of my passion for female involvement in peace and security I went further to pursue a master in Conflict Management and Peace Studies from the University of Jos. I’m still hoping to get a Ph.D. soonest in gender, conflict and peace development very soon.

I have also worked with the United Nations as well as several local and international bodies and agencies as a consultant.

As the head of the gender and vulnerable group care unit of NEMA, tell us briefly what your job entails?
The unit I head is situated under the relief and rehabilitation department of the agency. Speaking personally and not officially, I facilitate the process of mainstreaming gender and inclusion of women and other vulnerable groups into disaster management programs and activities in the country. We work with several partners in the discharge of these duties.

What would be the role of women in the prevention and response to gender based violence that you are promoting?
Disaster affects both men and women disproportionately. There is no doubting the fact that cultural barriers, patriarchal norms and impediments have increased the risk and vulnerabilities of women to disasters more than their male counterpart.

Of course, not all women are equally vulnerable or exposed to the effects of hazards and disasters in identical ways. Women’s lives, like men’s, are shaped both by gender relations in a particular culture, or by everything else about them; their age, their physical capacities, their ethnic or racial status and economic conditions, to name a few.

Research conducted around the world from a gender perspective does suggest that women are likely to be especially vulnerable to disasters, simply because gender inequality is so widespread. The daily lives of girls and women may increase their exposure to all kinds of unsafe conditions and hazardous events. Women also tend to have less power in household decisions, just as they are under-represented in political decision making. When their voices aren’t heard, their immediate needs or long-term interests may not be taken into account.

This is why we need more women and girls to be involved in disaster management activities and humanitarian response in the country especially at the highest levels of decision-making.

Would you say your background in NGO and similar roles are helping out today?
I belong to a lot of professional bodies both locally and internationally such as Professionals in Humanitarian Assistance and Protection (PHAP), International Association of Emergency Managers, Global Network of Women Peace builders, Chartered Institute of Human Capital Development of Nigeria and Nigerian Institute of Training and Development, amongst others. I have also obtained a certificate in Executive Leadership from Howard University and attended the commission on the status of women at the United Nations among others.

So, looking at all these and considering how far I’ve gone in the NGO field, I can boldly say that it has set me on a good pedestal and guiding me to where I am today. It has been quite rewarding because through that, I’ve been opportune to work with a lot of people in government, private sectors, development partners, local NGOs, media and the academia. In fact it was because of my achievement in the NGO field that I got my present job.

How does your present position help in supporting victims of gender-based violence?
I work with women and girls and other vulnerable groups and I discover women suffer a lot in silence when they face violence, either domestically or in the public sphere. For instance, rape has become a major concern in our society today and many of us are keeping quiet about it, pretending it doesn’t exist.
Even the persons directly affected usually keep mute instead of seeking justice. The victims rationally fear the potential negative short- and long-term consequences for themselves and their families if people know their identities. Rape is a violation related more to power and violence than to sex, and yet cultural practices often unfairly place shame on the rape victim rather than the perpetrator, or consider rape victims as tainted or unmarriageable, creating significant consequences for victims’ psychological, physical and emotional well-being. Again, cultural and familial after-effects of stigmatization due to rape provide a significant disincentive to women and girls to publicly reveal their identities when discussing their rape before the law enforcement agent.

Women and girls who suffer from any act of violence need to be supported through trauma counselling, psychosocial support services, economic empowerment and encouraging them to speak out.

Rape in conflict situation is a crime against humanity just like genocide and the international community is taking it very seriously unlike here in Nigeria, we cannot continue to ignore the issue. I strongly believe and advocate that rape should carry a life sentence.

Who are your role models/who do you look up to?
I have great respect and admiration for a lot of Nigerian women and women who have dared to venture into fields that are usually perceived as male-dominated. I celebrate the courage and determination of most Nigerian and African women because it is not easy to be a female achiever in Africa because of the environment we find ourselves.

I look up to a lot of women locally and internationally and they include Hillary Clinton, she is a woman that stands out for me any day. I happen to be a Vital Voices Fellow and she is the Founder of Vital Voices Global Partnership and I happen to be a beneficiary of her mentorship. Another woman is Amina Mohammed, the current deputy Secretary General of the United Nations, she is a woman that has stood the test of time, Senator Binta Garba-Marsi and several other Nigerian women, both in the political sphere, in government, in all spheres of life in general. In short, any Nigerian woman doing great exploits. I consider her a role model, because it is not easy.

Your advice for women looking up to you and anyone that wants to do what you do?
I would simply tell them to have faith in God, for with God all things are possible and also very important, believe in your dreams and work hard to achieve them.

Source: Guardian

 In our society today, when a man is cheating on his wife with another woman, the other woman is called out and labeled a whore. But the man?

Sonia Ogbonna,who is also a life coach on her Instagram page complained about the double standard regarding this issue.

According to her, women should tackle the problem which is the man and stop shaming the other woman who may or not know whether the man is married.

In her words: 

I’M SO SICK OF DOUBLE STANDARDS. Help me understand this please: so when a woman cheats on her man, y’all don’t call a side dude “home breaker” and “wife snatcher”. Instead, wife is labeled as an irresponsible whore.

When a man cheats on his woman, it’s not a man that you will blame. You justify his actions just because,(even though in most cases his married self is the one throwing bread at them babes) and it’s all “side chick’s” fault.

She is the one you will abuse, insult and call names, “husband snatcher aka home breaker”..etc… I don’t get.. The most painful thing is, it’s WOMEN who support, accept and teach their daughters to live according such double standards, not even men sef.

It’s your fellow lady that will call you names and point fingers at you. Stop shaming one another all in the name of idiotic competition based on jealousy and personal insecurities among women. YOUR MAN DOES NOT TREAT YOU RIGHT BECAUSE YOU SETTLED FOR IT AND ALLOWED IT , NOT BECAUSE OF ANOTHER WOMAN.

The reason why women are so bitter, angry, unhappy, lonely and ready to tolerate and settle for nonsense is because they seek the approval of their own worth from men since they are not familiar with it themselves. Purpose of your existence is not all about getting yourself a man.

Getting married is NOT an achievement nor a proof of a woman’s worth. There is so much more to that. Get your life right before becoming someone’s wife. Seek your worth within yourself before you expect it from HIM to acknowledge it.

These ones are another kind of mischance.
Don’t get me wrong, nothing beats a partner who is really into you. A partner interested in every detail of your welfare is fantastic but borderline is when he is becoming too interested in your every detail.
I get, your partner wants to spend every waking moment with you but if this is infringing your productivity or happiness, it sure is a sign you don’t want to ignore.
It is not bad to want to want to be in control of happenings/situations in your life and as a matter of fact, knowing you have or are in control of your relationship can be a morale booster, a push on self-esteem but when your partner becomes dominantly manipulative and controlling, it is only a matter of time before you lose yourself in that relationship.
Obsessive partners are controlling and very manipulative. They want to be the final say, scratch that, they want to be the only say in the relationship. They don’t take no for an answer. It’s either their way or their way. They pressure you till you cave in.
You know what happens with controlling behavior, it fasts degenerates into emotional abuse.
Let’s be real, most violent partners/ relationships don’t start out being outrightly violent. There are usually the tell tale signs.
These are the signs that you need to look out for.
It is okay to get jealous. I mean, who doesn’t get sweaty palms with threats? However, extreme and excessive jealousy is very dangerous.
Excessive jealousy is when your partner has a constant conversation in their head that you are cheating or will cheat and so puts extreme and dehumanizing measures in place to curb this.
Wait, isn’t love supposed to be accompanied with trust?
Trust is fundamental in a relationship. Excessively jealous partners don’t have this. They think their spouses are so vulnerable, they can cheat with anybody. They suffer so much insecurity, it is limiting their reasoning.
Another thing an obsessive partner does is help or mandates you to cut ties with your loved one. This is very dangerous. They try to pull off all plugs that may be your succor should their be a fall out. They are sometimes harsh and brash in their approach of severing ties or they may subtly orchestrate ways to let these loved ones go. They are skilled in manipulation so this is no feat at all.
How do they achieve this? They make you feel guilty. You eat and drink guilt. You never give them enough attention they say. They make it seem like the love they have for you is so overwhelming, they can’t live without you.
Messed up reasoning? Yup! Their reasoning is not only messed up, they mess with yours too.
Your self esteem begins to dwindle till you lose touch with reality.
Experts manipulators they are!
If your relationship is not in its early stages where infatuation is allowed to some extent, you may want to check out what those extreme traits you noticed in your partner is about.

As Comedian/Motivational speaker, Alibaba, shared via Instagram this morning.

“People who have only sex to offer are the ones who get jealous, suspicious and quarrelsome. You know why? Because they know that you might go out one day and find someone who has more than sex to offer. So what does that leave them? So they start to put their spouse in the defensive.

Go take a critical look at most of those relationships where the guy or babe has only one thing to offer, they will keep talking of security. They want reassurances always. Tell me you love. Promise you will not leave me. Are you sure you are not playing with me? Am I the only one in your life? Do you really love me? Are you tired of this relationship? Do you still love me? …. blah blah blah! When all you have is a hammer everything is a nail. That is what sums up these kind of people. That explains why they get so angry when you are away from them for so long. Their only stake in the relationships needs to be activated regularly to remain relevant in the scheme of things and in their spouses thoughts.

“That also explains why many who marry because the sex is good, find out later that good sex doesn’t pay bills. Neither does it cook, run the home, guarantee respect, make your spouse a person you can rub minds with and not skin. You see you may not know it, but I will tell you, you may be extremely beautiful. That is good. But like sex, if that beauty is all there is to you, in the relationship, the day that beauty is discounted by someone else who has brain and beauty body and cooking skills, with a good dose of home management, last last na modeling agency go need you. So you are a guy, and all you have in your value proposition brief case is muscles. Hiaaaaam. No common sense. Nothing else. So Iet’s look at the sex sef… after a while, its bargaining value in the relationships could diminish. When that happens what will be your new bargaining chip? Same goes for cash. I know a top society lady who married a big time Lagos big boy, when she knew he was in bad times, she vamoosed! And went to kids for another man. How could she? She could, and she did. Some people too, if the marry you because of your Dad’s political office, when the term of office is running out, they run out too.”

Actress Regina Chukwu who lost her husband to the cold hands of death in June 2003, says she doesn’t like being referred to as a single mother. Speaking in an interview with The Nation, Regina said

“I don’t like being referred to as a single parent. The fact that I lost my husband does not make me a single parent. I just want to take God, for the way they have turned out to be. I am my daughter’s best friend”.

On why she hasn’t remarried, Regina says it is because of her kids.

“Actually, it is because of them that I decided not to remarry then. Like I said earlier, I won’t call myself a single parent, because I am Igbo. The fact that you have lost your husband does not mean that you are still not married to that family. So as it is traditionally I am still married to my husband family. I am still their wife and if they want to do any family function, I am considered and called upon. I still belong to the community wives meeting. When my husband passed away, I was called and asked if I wanted to remarry. The condition was for me to leave their children and go ahead. But I looked at my kids and they were still very young and I decided to stay. My children have been asking if I won’t remarry; they want a baby sister or brother. But I don’t know what God has in plan for me. I am open to whatever God is says will happen to me. If I decide to remarry now, it means whoever I want to get married to will pay my bride price and my parents will then go back to my late husband’s family to return the bride price they paid on me. It is tradition telling them this lady is no longer your wife. But when it is not done, I still remain their wife. I still paid my mother-in-law a visit last year”she said Regina says it hasn’t being easy being a widow “It hasn’t been easy. I started my career about 13 years ago and my kids were still very young at that time. But today, my daughter is 16 and my son is 14, I am grateful to God. But not that they are grown up, it gives me more time to be able to pursue my dream to the level I want to take it to. Not that I have attained that dream, because I am yet to receive some awards that I want my name on, but so far, it has been great. It is not that I don’t worry about their welfare, but I have my mom and my siblings to fall back on their wellbeing, wherever I am not around”.